Why would my husband have the need/desire to look at other naked women on the computer?

I don't mean to sound silly but I am a HOT 30yo woman. I do anything and everything in the bedroom for him, keep him totally sexually satisfied, and we have fun doing it. Our sex life has always been awesome. I am a great wife. We have fun together. We laugh and play and tease each other like kids. I totally busted him when I found some crap he looked up on the Internet (girls with big fake boobs, wet t shirt contests, big asses, muscular legs, sh*t like that). I was beyond hurt. My last marriage ended because of this and he knew what kind of emotional damage it has left me with. I feel like he chose those other women over me. He says that it's ridiculous to think that! Umm hello?! I told him before we got married that I could basically deal with anything BUT THAT! I'm TRYING with all my heart to move past it but I think about it constantly. He wants me to forgive him but I can't, not when he KNEW the extent of the damage my ex did to me. Now we can't even go to the pool together because I feel that he's eye f***ing every chick that may be up there. I don't want to feel that I'm married to a perv. We have 2 kids together. 10yo boy and 3yo girl. Please someone help me get this sorted out in my head. Thanks.

 

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What Girls Said 26

What Guys Said 37

  • You want honesty? Everybody's "normal" is different. I'm not going to press my beliefs on you but answer your question. Truth is you were up front with him about how you felt. He obviously agreed or you would not be in a relationship right now.

    Yeah, maybe you have issues. I mean the reality is this is fantasy pictures on a website. But the truth is what it represents to you is more than an image.

    You had a devastating past experience to your ego. It matters. It effects your self image and by the comments you made you obviously try hard in all areas of your life to please your guy. You need that affirmation to give you empowerment. Your sexuality seems to feed off that. So the fact that he looked elsewhere made you feel the hit. Why can't you be enough?

    Am I on the right track?

    You are a beautiful, strong woman fighting against a world of accepted human behavior. Unfortunately you are going to have to sit down and decide,

    Can YOU buy into your own empowerment or not?

    If you can't and he cannot give you what you need you will just battle yourself for all the issues and no one wins.

    Bottom line- Respect yourself enough to give yourself a break. You are amazing but you cannot hold yourself to the comparison of a fake person in a fake internet world. If you can't reach that place in yourself to let it go then this "normal" behavior is not YOUR normal. If it hurts you then you have to remove it from either your brain (coming to terms) or removing it from your life.

  • men what if the guy keeps doing it like every time he check he's phone he check that to and its not p*rn its naked women not men and women just women that look different from us



  • I'm sorry but most of the guy's answers about it being "normal" are BULLSHIT. It is absolutely NOT normal, it has BECOME normalized over the past couple of decades but this species went thousands of years without it! It has also been proven to RUIN relationships, so again saying p*rn has nothing to do with relationships is BULLSHIT. There have been psychological studies which have proven that it rewires men's brains, and watching p*rn just trains the brain to watch more, watch harder, watch nastier, watch more degrading p*rn. It completely changes the way men view women, in molds men's minds into believing that that is what's hot, that's what's sexy, and that to turn men on they need to be complete whores. Men who watch p*rn also have a MUCH harder time getting as turned on by real women as they do by p*rn. P*rn ruins men's imaginations, makes them lazy thinkers (the sexual fantasies they have are based on sh*t they've seen in p*rn, not actually being creative), and it COMPLETELY devalues, degrades and objectifies women. P*rn has turned from a women laying out in a playboy mag to chicks now getting pummeled by a group of guys, used and degraded, and now that it what men have been molded to be turned on by. P*rn addiction is no f***ing joke, it ruins men's minds, it is ABSOLUTELY perverted ( I mean hello sex was designed for procreation and love expression, not 20 guys cumming in some chick's mouth), and it ruins relationships. Any guy who does not want to face the harsh realities of p*rn, what it has done to relationships and to men's views of women, what it does to shape their own f***ing minds, is in denial. They're in denial because they don't want to have to own up to a bad habit, they don't want to acknowledge it as problematic, they don't want to stop doing it. That's the bottom line. Since other guys do it too it's "normal". Well, in China they harvest organs on the black market, a lot of people do it, even the government's in on it, does that make it normal? Absolutely f***ing not. What's perverse and wrong is perverse and wrong no matter how many people are doing it. And not ALL men watch p*rn. Many do, but there are plenty of straight men out there who respect women and CHOOSE NOT TO watch it! Imagine that! A guy with some dignity and taste, imagine that.

    • Oh and by the way, if there's nothing "wrong" with watching p*rn, why the hell are men so embarrassed by it? They're not too embarrassed to jack off to it but they're embarrassed if anyone else sees or knows what they've been looking at. Good deeds are done in the light, bad deeds are done in the dark. If there's nothing wrong with it, why hide it? Why get embarrassed by it? Why have that shameful demeanor? Because it IS wrong, it IS shameful, and they f***ing KNOW IT.

  • Mans think that we women don't the same desire as they do infact I now some woman's who have such strong desire see man fail to realized that some of them at not even good looking at all but they think in their head that they are all that wake up the majority of does p*rn star woman don't mind getting laid and pay but they also HAVE A STONG DESIRE FOR THE SIX PACK MAN OR AT LEAST THE WELL FITTED MAN . That is all you see let's be real in does video because is not just about sex but also image so the gentlemans in this fascinating world YA THINK WE ARE LESS BEAUTIFUL A HAVE GOOD NEWS OS LESS ATTRACTIVE TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT YOUR SELF FIRST. And if p*rn is not going away neither are we wives and girlfriend.

  • He has a dangerous addiction, and is a douche.

  • My boyfriends the same way. I give him anything he wants sexually, and he still insists on watching porn. What I've learned? Men are horny. You are probably super sexy, but he's just being a man. Once they've seen one woman naked, they want to see them all. What I've learned to do? Next time you catch him masterbating to porn either on t.v. or internet, walk up to him confidently and begin giving him oral. Invite him to enjoy a porn with you the next time you enjoy intercourse. ...you never know, This could turn you on just as much as it does him.


    Don't freak out. He's just being a man. He knows you're beautiful. And if you can't beat him, join him. Sit down beside him and start watching it. That'll turn him on more than you know.

  • * READ ME THIS WILL WORK! *

    I had the same problem. It was driving me nuts everywhere we went I was constantly thinking about what he was thinking about! but that's different now... what I did was I toke pictures of myself, like if he was searching for example wet t-shirt I toke a picture like that and put it on our computer desktop under DON'T OPEN.. (I knew he would open it ) and every picture he searched there was a picture of me, and if he searched videos there was a video... the second thing I did was I had another item on our desktop called DON'T OPEN 2 (once again knew he would open it) and in that document was a little msg from me telling him how if he wants to see more to leave a document on the desktop marked OPEN. This really helped save my relationship and it sparked a little bit of excitement for the both of us.. it was fun! and when he got home and I went on the computer there was a document marked open with a little msg inside. I talked to him about it that night and asked if he would be cool if I left those pictures for him instead of him searching and giving us viruses! lol he agreed and I haven't had that problem since! but if you can't use your computer because of the kids... ViA text ;) its a huge turn on for guys or even leave picutres on his phone for him but just let him know that they are there. so that he does'nt go showing co-workers pictures of the kids and OOPS ! trust me if this doesn't work I don't know what will!

    best of luck!

  • Speaking from the perspective of a grown woman your age, there's nothing wrong with you or him. This has nothing to do with you. It's just a fantasy he has, and it's involving pictures and not real people. It doesn't mean you aren't enough. You've never fantasized about another man? It's not meant to be anything that materializes in any realistic way. It's a harmless hormonal thing. I suggest you invest in some toys and have your own fantasy life so you won't feel bad about it anymore.

  • Unfortunately, I see this kind of attitude all too often--still. Why some people choose to embrace the sentiments of the 1950's-1980's is beyond me. This new age puritanical revival fueled by very insecure and overly damaged people (championed by their women and abused and bruised by their men) is over. It's done. Let it go. Women are powerful and are not afraid to grab what they want and do what they want. This includes watching or making porn. This includes doing whatever they wish to do in the bedroom because THEY want to do it, not because they have a wifely duty to serve their man like the 1950's brought back into American culture after WWII, or especially NOT because they fear losing "their man" if they don't. I hate to get into politics here because this is NOT the proper forum for it so I will end my rant there.


    Like some of the others have suggested, try watching it with your husband. What exactly is it that you are afraid of regarding him watching porn? All people look at other people (real life, porn or wherever) in a sexual manner. Mostly this is on a subconscious level that one is never aware of but often it becomes obvious (even to others if you drool). This is NORMAL. It is biology. If you don't operate this way then you are abnormal. Healthy biological beings all have this drive. The psyche is also designed to kick in here by giving you sexual thoughts, little fantasies or just urges and attractions to make sure that the biology does what it is supposed to do--MATE.


    * You may be a gorgeous woman (to a degree. real attractiveness is mostly attitude).

    * You may be a wonderful wife (in a limited capacity. attitude is a great trait).

    * You may be great in bed (but being amazing means that everything you do is of your own volition; mind, body and soul). I may be wrong but are you sure that what you do sexually with him is FULLY enjoyed by you? At one point you say that you "do anything and everything in the bedroom for him, keep him totally sexually satisfied, and we have fun doing it." and then you later imply that he is a "perv." There is a major conflict there.

    * It doesn't sound like you are healthy. Both of you get advice and get help. You both have two children. Don't you dare follow the party line and split up. Selfish selfish selfish! Get your self (and your husband) straightened out. Get your sh*t together. Your children come first.

    * It doesn't sound like the proper communication is being shared from either of you.

    * Relax. Try to have more fun. Try to be more open.


    I truly wish you and your children the best of success and hope you both find a way to more greatly enjoy life.

  • Ya know what.

    I am in the same situation your in. I'm a fine ass girl who does everything in the bedroom.

    But yet when guys are with me they have the desire to look at other women, although guys that walk past them are looking at me.

    I have come to the determination that men may be satisfied with their women in the bedroom,

    but they will always have the desire to look at other women.

    It is something natural and it is something you have to get over. Eyes are made for looking. As long as he isn't disrespecting you and getting other girls numbers. Everything should be fine.

    • Exactly. As he's looking at other women, the other guys with them are looking at you. Nobody is in imminent danger of jumping ship. Guys always look.


      (Or they stifle themselves with great effort even as they remain intensely aware of the women they're "not looking at.")

  • Porn has nothing to do with how he feels about you or what he thinks of you.Porn is for entertainment and to help people get off.A person can be with the sexiest person on earth,have earth shattering orgasms and the best sex with them,but the best sex is always with ones self.Why?Who knows yourself,your body and your pleasure better than you.Men are visual,and porn just allows them to be turned on.You're insecurity and jealousy is what will push him away.porn is just to help people get off,if he wanted someone else,i guarantee he would be with someone else.You can't be there every moment of his life every time he gets horny or needs to release

  • i would say let him do what he wants girl.if not this will cause strain on ur relationship its just video or pictures anyways if you can't stand him doing that am sure you could not stand him cheating..so let it be he'll get tiredor find ways to enjoy it with him...me and boyfriend does I'm always happy when he does because sex is always great after...

  • Tell him how you do really feel about the situation. Ask him if you don't satisfied him enough so that's why he sees pornography, ask him if he does really know how you do feel.


    Independently his answer, you should keep up your self steem and think about the most important thing: your family.


    But most important, tell him to shut off all that porno, not because you "want to ruin his fun", because of your children, what will happen if one of them busts him like you did or sees it accidentally? As advice, you have to do a parental block in your computer, but also tell him before you do it.

  • It hurts you, so he should get rid of it. End of discussion.

  • Wow, I understand how you feel. He should have respected your view on the whole shabang on porn -- especially if you try and succeed in keeping him sexually satisfied. Heck, I'd be frustrated beyond belief... but sadly, porn is a form of eye candy. Not saying everyone likes porn, but everyone likes eye candy.


    But in this situation, he needs to let it go... it's hard as hell, but he should if he loves you.

  • as long as he's with you , that's what matters but he's got to stop it and just tell him that directly and hopefully he gets over this addiction of his.

  • my boyfriend is the same way and I'm a hot girl and we have a great life together



  • he just likes to mix it up a bit.

  • maybe he has an addiction

    =[

    get help asap

  • I know exactly how you feel! I told my boyfriend that I couldn't tolerate cheating and I felt like watching porn was a form of cheating. I grew up with a porn addicted father who eventually cheated on my mom and left her along with me and my two younger siblings. My mom was devastated and to this day doesn't date because she is afraid of having another broken heart. She and I feel very similar about the situation. I feel like I'm not good enough, as does she. My boyfriend swore up and down that it had nothing to do with me. He is probably right, but I still feel as if I don't make him happy.


    I have a 3 month old daughter now, and I refuse to let her live in the same kind of household I did when I was a child. I remember finding adult magazines hidden all over the house. I remember turning on the computer and finding XXX rated pictures and videos my father had downloaded. My boyfriend swore he won't watch it anymore as soon as he found out I was pregnant because he is afraid of losing his daughter. It's a hard habit to break, I'll tell you that! He struggled with it my entire pregnancy. He has yet to watch it since she's been born. I think our daughter is my answered prayer.

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  • Selected as most helpful

    It hurts me to know how you feel.

    I don't think I'm the best to tell you this because I'm not your age, nor have I ever been married.

    I'm a guy, so I know how I feel when I look at these images.

    I never really search for it, unless I'm already looking at it through maybe a pop-up or something.

    I honestly though, don't think he's in the state of opposition as you are.

    I know how much it hurts to see him do something that you don't approve of, but in his defense, its more momentary enjoyment, and trust me, they don't even compare to you in his mind. Why he did it is something of a phase that he was probably going through.

    It shouldn't be expected that he wants out of what you two have built.

    I know you've told him before how you feel about that, and not that he forgot, but now that he sees the seriousiness behind that, I doubt he'll ever do it again.

    I know you feel like he's fullfilling a need else where, but its really not the case.

    Maybe he's uses it to get ready for you... just maybe...


    Older men would always tell me "Looking is okay".

    Men will look...

    My thing is "Look but don't touch"

    I seriouly hope things turn around for you.

    Good Luck



    Sincerely,

    A Loving Black Man

  • 2mo

    you man may have p*rn addiction. YourBrainOnPorn Dot Com

  • It sounds like you both have very healthy sex drives. Your husband also has very very mild taste in p0rn, considering the range and depth of what is available.


    This really does sound like a problem for you. You seem like a perfectly nice person, and your husband sounds like a normal human being.


    But this problem is one of your own making. You say you told him that you would stand for anything except him looking at p0rn. And then you say you “busted” him by going through his search history. So he wasn’t doing it in front of you. He was doing it secretly because he knew how you felt about the subject. And you went out of your way to find out the details


    Most men, and many many women use p0rn. Does this make them “pervs”? Of course not.

    Guys who rig cameras to look up dresses at the mall are pervs.

    Guys who google “wet-t shirt” are not.


    There is an old saying –“it doesn’t matter where you get your appetite, as long as you come home to eat”.


    Are you really (and I mean REALLY) saying that you never cast a secret look at the guys at the pool and think “Oooh. He’s yummy”? Never, ever?


    Because if you haven’t you may need apply for sainthood, or seek counselling about your repressed sexuality. And if you have, even once, then it is pretty hypocritical to call your husband out for the same behaviour.


    Is your husband really comparing you to these images, or are you just worried that he secretly is? Is he actually saying to you “I wish you had boobs like this girl”? Or are you just annoyed that you aren’t the exact centre of his universe 24/7?


    Because if it’s the former, that is something you should both sit down and talk about. If that is the case, he has the problem and you are right to be concerned.


    But if it’s the latter, then YOU have the problem. And you need to get your crap together , and take a really good long look at what is causing you to think like this. Or you risk losing the man that you obviously love, and the father of your kids, over such a trivial and normal behavior that it’s hard to believe that you’re even asking the question.



    Relax and listen to his side. He is NOT your previous husband. It’s time to move on passed your last marriage, and make your present one work.


    Good luck. I hope it all works out for you

  • looking at p*rn is normal. he may be checking other girls out but I'm sure youve checked out guys too before, its not fun when it happens to you but its normal and EVERYONE does it. it doesn't mean anything will come out of it. I think you need to relax.



    but anyway you sound hot so you should message me please

  • If you ask me looking at porn is normal. If a cut guy goes by you with his shirt off you look don't you? If I see a girl in wet look leggings I look it's just normal. I look at some porn on line once in a while my sister ogles naked men on line and her and her girl friends send pictures of naked men to each other. I don't see what the problem is. Unless you husband IS some kind of pervert and he's constantly surfing porn and e mailing these women etc It seems just like a person looking for natural sexual release. Being jealous of a bunch of porn women and cgi images that he looks at seems a little odd to me. Maybe you should go and see a professional if this persists it doesn't sound healthy.

  • I went through this with my ex wife. She felt the same way you do. However, guys like some alone time to themselves as well as wife time. He may like to see something like that once in awhile or he may like something and not want to tell you about it. We enjoy our time with our wives but he may just want to do a quicky where he doesn't have to worry about pleasing anyone but himself.

    Things you can do to help alleviate it all. Be open to try some things he is looking up on the computer at a spur moment. put on a whtie shirt and wet it down when he walks through the door "on accident" , darn that sink faucet.

    Offer to watch it with him. Tell him you want to put on a porn and watch it with him. See what excites him.

    Just realize that sometimes we want a quick thing that involves jsut us. It isn't always about wahts on the other side. maybe take some photos and put them on the computer for him. Or if he has a porn folder delete it all and put photos of you in it.

  • I think its more of your problem than his.First thing when you knew he watches it and you don't like it then you shouldn't have married him.Second thing is that after 10+ year old marriage and you are still stuck with the reason that failed your first marriage to me it looks like you have ego problem as well as insecurity issues.Probably you really don't want your marriage to work otherwise getting divorced over some stupid reason like porn doesn't make sense.

  • just so you know, the parts of a woman's brain that light up during conversation are the same areas that light up in guy's brains when they look at hardcore porn. I look at absolutely crazy things that don't get translated into real life, like triple penetration, stuff like that. you are insecure and misunderstand why guys masturbate

  • your not married to a prev. your married to a man. all men are prevs to a certain extent.

    that said, pornography can be more addictive than heroin. its not that he isn't getting what he needs from you, its that its VERY easy to get on the computer to pay taxes and end up looking at naked women... easier than you would think.

    dont be hurt, but maybe he should get some counseling... I'm not a big fan of most of the advice that shrinks give people... but like I said, to men porn is really really addictive.

  • I answer this same basic question a lot here and in real life too.


    I personally feel that it has NOTHING to do with desire or intent and EVERYTHING to do with primal instinct!


    Very few species on this planet actually practice monogamy. If you look at the natural world you see males mating with as many females as they can. Why? Diversity. Spreading the strong genetic characteristics that allowed him to get the females in the first place.


    Well, News Flash. Human Beings live under the same natural laws that the animals do. Yes, he have opposing thumbs and walk upright... but according to a lot of scientist dudes we didn't always! Our lives are made up of our experiences AND our instincts! Every time we try to mold the laws of nature around our humanity and our MASSIVE human egos it ends up in disaster.


    Then again, I could be full of sh*t!

  • You have every right to feel upset. While some people will tell you that porn is "normal", it's also your RIGHT to be with someone who shares your view and only wants you. If he knew from the start that you didn't like porn and how it felt for you, then he should have respected that. In this case, he didn't.

  • Nothing wrong with it, or just feeling insecure it seems. Your hot and established but give the guy some credit he is a male. He has erges you can't simply put out. Plus sometimes it leads to better ideas in the bedroom. If you really hate it. Then do this.




    Watch it with him and get an idea of what he likes and wants. Then form a plan and do it. So you can build some confidence and he can see you care. You can even cut a deal.

  • this will sound harsh, but I see this tpe of question a lot and it makes me sick thinking that people are breaking up over it.

    LET IT GO. you ruined one marriage already, don't do it again. ALL MEN ALWAYS LOOK AT AND APPRECIATE EVERY HOT GIRL THEY EVER SEE EVER!

    if you think otherwise you are kidding yourself and all girls need to get this through their heads.

    stop trying to police people's minds. he doesn't tell you what is okay to think about and look at, so don't tell him. that fact that it bothers you so much speaks volumes about your mental state. you have a serious insecurity issue. some girls see sexuality as unseperable from love and relationships, but this is JUST PLAIN WRONGHEADED. I'll masterbate to pictures and the thought of my girl's own friends or anyone else I find sexy. big f'n deal. I never cheat on her. I never do anything gross or inappropriate.

    let him get the stuff from porn that he doesn't get from you. would you rather get fake boobs or let him jack off to it once in a while?

    guys just really don't get the problem with this. we don't feel lie we are doing anything wrong and it is because we aren't. it has nothing to do with our wives or relationships at all, it is just jerking off. stop confusing the two.

    • Well, "Lady Nike", there you go again.........why do you ALWAYS have to come up with the best answer.................damn, give me a chance once in a while.


      FYI............I have not see you post in quite a while.........hope you are alright /


      Bruce

    • Women too. A lot of guys need to stop saying "..all guys look at porn..." Tell all your friends: women love porn too. All men AND women look at other people (porn or real life) sexually whether they are conscious of it or not. It's basic biology and psychology.

  • Because they are there. Women are beautiful. Sexy women even more beautiful. As simple as that. Nothing "pervert" about that.:


    Endymion ( John Keats)


    A thing of beauty is a joy for ever:

    Its loveliness increases; it will never

    Pass into nothingness; but still will keep

    A bower quiet for us, and a sleep

    Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing.

    Therefore, on every morrow, are we wreathing

    A flowery band to bind us to the earth,

    Spite of despondence, of the inhuman dearth

    Of noble natures, of the gloomy days,

    Of all the unhealthy and o'er-darkened ways

    Made for our searching: yes, in spite of all,

    Some shape of beauty moves away the pall

    From our dark spirits.


    Read the complete text here: link One of the most beautiful English texts.


    You can't expect a man not to look at girls on the beach or near the pool either.

    He's looking, but you call it "eye f***ing". That's the difference.


    "My last marriage ended because of this"

    Then I suspect the one who has a problem is you.

    "I am a HOT 30yo woman."

    Yes, probably.


    "I am a great wife."

    Are you that sure about it?


    Jealousy comes from fear, fear of being inferior (that fear -or feeling- hasn't to reflect a reality! ! Just fear or the feeling is enough. )

    I'm NOT saying you are not a great wife, I'm saying you're not sure about it at all !


    Think about it. Seriously.



  • One thing should reassure you: the more women het looks at, the less chances there are that he will get obsessed or in love or both with one particular woman and dump you.

  • Guys just can't resist it "unlimited free naked women" it has nothing to do with you. If you are worried about your husband looking at other girls that's probably because he is but that is just human nature if you married him that means you should trust him and trust that he won't do any thing but look.

  • Your last marriage screwed you up to an insecurity issue...Now I'm a big fan of internet porn to an extent and I have an awesome girlfriend. At this point...if your homeboy is talking, communicating, chatting, or got the skanks in your home. You shouldn't have nothing to worry. If you are that secure in your marriage that is. But think of the reason why you married this guy...then ask yourself has he gone too far? What is too far? Texting, chatting, skank in your home is too far...none of that is going on. And you are probably in a better marriage anyways. Think, us men will look at a walk-by chick at the pool, beach, or computer...its how we re-act to the "walk-by" situation. At most times its innocent...Geez, when guys go to a live football game do you think they would actually ask their wives "Honey, may I look at the cheerleaders perform at half-time or should I go to the toliet and miss that routine for you?"...thats how lame it sounds. If he is looking its innocent on the computer...what he is doing with it is totally different. My buddy's wife won't let him look at porn...but he can have risky photos of her in his Iphone...so you decide. Get back if you need more advice.

  • Hmm when I hear anyone doing anything like that I think of the 80/20 complex saying when a man/ woman is only getting 80 percent out of a relationship the person will go to another source for that extra 20 but this idk. he might not be perverted but I would talk with him about it. ask him if its something about you or if its him. its hard to tell. good luck! I hope everything works out for you and your family =[

  • Well, it can't be removed from your head because it is YOUR problem. Being a guy, I can understand him looking at porn. From my standpoint (being a guy) you'd have a lot to worry about IF he didn't have porn as an outlet. Notice I didn't say the "only outlet". He has a lot on his plate. The job, you, and the kids to provide for.

    And I KNOW "Sex Time" is relevant when it comes to Men & Women's views. What you think is a good pace for your sex lives may not be anywhere near enough for him. And if it is, he still a guy! We have that drive! It's there. It's always going to be there. It starts at 13, for some of us sooner, and won't end until we're in our late 60's from what I've read. Married or not married; kids or no kids it is a NEED FOR RELEASE. It has nothing to do with porn. It went from France to the Underground in Prohibition times to Magazines in the 50s & 60s to VHS in the 70s & 80s and then to Internet porn. All of which just made it easier for guys to satisfy a need when the wife was not in the mood.

    You're dad was a disillusioned scumbag. He thought the girls in those magazines could be his. Today smart men have no disillusions about the shaved blonde slavic and califorina barbie types who are a dime-a-dozen in porn. All they amount to is a quick & easy way to get Rosy Palm to be more efficient.


    You need to get that through your head. The only way you make it a threat is by making an issue of it. In a backwards way you are going to force the scenario you don't want to happen.

    I saw you asked "If a wife or girlfriend got on the phone to talk to some guy to fufill her "needs" then would we be okay with that? And if that was the case then what did the women need thier bf/husband for?" This is where Men & Women differ. You just added a sense that is not there. For men it's all visual; only visual. NO interaction.


    It's a what a lot of people refer to as a "guy-thing." Women have thier "thing" too. Like planning Weddings or putting those damn sailor suits( with that damn hat that has the ribbon hanging) on our infant boys! And the insufferable need to stop at Bed, Bath & Beyond 15 minutes before kick-off! But do we pose ultimatums over those towels you hang in the bathroom that we are NOT supposed to use? No! Why? Because we know there's porn. You have Registrys, baby clothes, shoe stores, & Soap. We have sports, Barbeque & porn.

    Look, you're obviously (and unjustly. But that's only MY opinion) making your current husband foot the bill over some baggage caused by your ol' man and 1st husband. Get some help and maybe have him go with you. And you two can work it out like that. Because I've read some of your responses to some of the other answers long after you posed your question. You get extremely closed minded when one of the guys is openly blunt and (sometimes) hostile. So maybe getting yourself some professional help, not counselling, is in order.

    TTFN!

  • Hi Ladies, I am going to be frank with you'll. Guys you have to stop lying to you'll women. Most guys looks at porn for different reasons. For example, it has nothing to do with the lady they are with. Guys just don't want to feel like they are the lesser dogs and be called a dummy when they don't certain things like different sexual positions. Furthermore, it natural for guys and girls to look at other people it is called quasority. To be frank, I think all women should know what their men like about them. But on the other hand most women uses this as a weapon against them to get what she wants. Most guys are turn on by different things like the breast, lips, hips, ass, hair, facial feature, eyes, and the way she walks or sits. For me, several years ago I had a serious problem I just believe that are girls were slut even it God said that they were a virgin, this was due personal experiences and because of catching girls lying to many times. But to keep on the subject, I does look at porn but I cannot remember what I saw as soon as I close the browser. However when I look at porn, for example I would used to girls that I have seen during the day and try to look for girls that look like them or a beautiful girl that I am trying to talk to and see what they would look like naked. For example, if I see a girl sitting with short skirt on and has on no undies, because if I would look at her to long and she sees me I would be pervert to her so I just check the Internet to see what a girl v's look like in that position and how it look. You see most girls thinks that guys are perverts if they are sitting down bad and he look at their product but that not true. They are just so happy to see it, they forget to look away so girls think they are when they just want to capture how beautiful it look. As for me I don't care about this, just want to see if you have a 10000 girls if all their v look alike. I think people or girl should sit their children down and tell them that it is ok to have small breast, or 3/4 of all girl insert things down their even if they have not been with a man. Also, that 98 % of all girls masturbate whether or not they admitted it. When I look at porn I usually get a cac girl , negro and a Asian girl and see the different in their v's. However most guys looks at porn just to knowledge about a women body because most girls never let their boyfriend sees them naked. stastic shows that only 20% of all women are comfortable with letting their boyfriend see them naked so to fulfilled this lust to see their girlfriend naked they turns to the internet to get whet they want. To be frank, if you want your boyfriend to stop looking at porn go sleep naked and walk around in the room naked when he is there and he will stop. There are certain things men wants to know about a lady but because they don't want to offend you'll they turn to other sources. A guy just want t see V's when they want to see it and not bagging every time for it. That's why God created us naked!

  • get over it, guys look at porn, that's the way it is. he's not doing anything with the porn star in real life and probably wouldn't even if given a chance. the idea of porn is that its imaginary, its not real, doesn't really happen (do you get the point?) guys look at porn and that's never going to change. it doesn't matter how long you have been married, some times you just have to get off on something and porn is so easy to do that. he still loves you, still does things with you...so why would you care if he looks at porn? have you ever just been horny and wanted to do something about it? cause that's all he's doing.guys get horny and jerk it asap

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