Sexual Relationships
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Unfair assumptions some men make, about women who do not have sex with them early or easily

In my opinion, these are some unfair assumptions that guys make when they date a girl and she's not easy. Of course these are just my opinions and I do not think that this applies to all men.

1. She wants to get to know you and she wants you to get to know her

Unfair assumptions some men make, about women who do not have sex with them early or easily

Guys have you considered that a girl might actually want to get to know you first? Just because she's not giving it up like its going out of style does not mean she does not like you.

2. She's a lesbian

Unfair assumptions some men make, about women who do not have sex with them early or easily

Just because a girl does not want to have sex with a random guy she just met does not mean she Is not straight. Some guys are so full of themselves and think of a girl does not want them they don't like any guy. This one applies to guys who seek random hookups and one night stands and then get mad if she says no

3. Manipulative

Not all women are trying to use sex to get what they want. Not every women is a gold digger just like not every guy only wants sex.

Unfair assumptions some men make, about women who do not have sex with them early or easily

4. Traumatic experience

Some guys think a girl went through a bad sexual experience. Have guys ever considered that she just doesn't want to have sex with them? She may not find you sexually attractive.

5. Playing games

Some men don't respect women who have sex with them too soon but that does not mean she is playing games with you.

6. She's a prude

Some men think just because a girl is sexual that she's having sex. Having sex and being sexual are 2 different things sometimes depending on who the woman is. If a girl is a tease it does not always mean that she is down to fuck.

What are some other assumptions you think some men make about women who don't have sex immediately with them?

1 2

Most Helpful Guy

  • if a girl doesn't want to have sex with me I just asume she doesn't like me I don't take it personal or attack her but I do back off imediately

Most Helpful Girl

  • number 1 is confusing to me... do you agree or disagree?

    • Thanks for pointing that out

    • It started off as reasons but I should have looled over it

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What Girls & Guys Said

3 15

  • Forget sex, I'm still working on getting friends that are honest. Turns out, work is a terrible place to look. Especially if you work at a grocery store. Can't trust anyone.

    • It will be ok hang in there

  • I agree with this, #4 is one I've encountered

    Had a guy FRIEND get on top of me and try to finger me and I stopped him and he was like "have you been raped or something? "

    No? I just don't want you like that. Is that really hard to understand?

    • Wtf that sounds like sexual assault

    • Did you push him off you?

    • Nah he was drunk and sincerely thought I wanted it. He wasn't being sleazy. I just told him I don't want to do that and that was his reply but he backed off

  • If a guy feels that way about what a girl chooses to do with her body, than maybe it is best not to see that guy again.

  • I think guys generally just assume the first one. If they've been dating for months and still no sex, then they might start considering other possibilities. The lesbian thing is not likely to be considered seriously..

    • lol because guys like lesbians

    • not really. Guys like bisexuals, I suppose, but not lesbians. Not that they dislike them or anything - that's not the point. Guys are not likely to consider the possibility that a girl is a lesbian because if she were, she wouldn't be dating guys.

    • The lesbian reason only applies to guys who randomly approach girls to ask for sex not women who they are already dating. I'm pretty sure I typed that under the lesbian reason

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  • We all make assumptions, it's part of life. A day doesn't go by without making at least 1 assumption.
    I assume based on the individual. I know there are many many girls that will sleep with any guy, have random hookups and friends with benefits, but then start dating a guy and don't want to have sex for like 1-2 months. If that type of girl does that to me, she's just using me for my money and/or getting sex somewhere else.

    I don't mind waiting to have sex, but if I know that girl has had random hookups, I'm not gonna believe the "I'm not ready" bullshit, I'll be out in less than a heartbeat.

    I know some guys assume without reason, but many times assumptions just don't fall from the sky, they're generated by something.

    • So if a guy slept with a lot of women and he wants to wait to have sex with a girl then why is it not ok for the girl to assume that he is using her?

    • When did I say it's not ok? This Take is about women, if it was about men, or both, I would have included men in my comment.

    • why is it not ok for the girl to assume that he is using her? what would the guy be using the girl for? unless she makes more money than him and she is paying for all the dates, it's unlikely that a guy would be using her.

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  • I don't hate prudish women. I have more experience being a prude than they probably do. In fact, take any prudish woman you can find, and she can "withhold" sex from me as much as she wants, I could still defeat her in that competition. I wouldn't bat an eyelash. Nobody on this planet can last longer not having sex than me.

  • I'd just assume I'm not as attractive as the other guys who she did sleep with right away. I've heard that a lot of girls actually have higher physical standards for the guys they hookup with than they do for the guys they want a relationship with. So in a way it's more of a complement for a girl to sleep with you right away than it is for her to make you wait.

    "When it came to hooking up, my partners prerequisite were higher; at least superficially, than those I deemed necessary in a man I was dating. Seems weird to see that admission in type but quite frankly my criteria for a man I had a one night stand with were all superficially higher; looks, swag, attitude, dress, etc. When dating, the qualities in the men I sought dealt more with depth of character and intellect."

    dirtyinpublic.com/.../

    I know it's very common for girls to have sex right away with hot guys they meet at parties or on tinder but then when they meet the stable relationship material guy they play hard to get and make him wait maybe 1-3 months in some cases.

    I know it's up to the girl when she wants to sleep with me but id definitely prefer sooner. It makes me feel pathetic to have to spend months dating a girl to get something she has likely felt comfortable doing on the first or third date with other guys.

    Now I wouldn't pressure a girl to have sex with me, that defeats the purpose. Like you wouldn't want to pressure your boyfriend to buy you a gift for your aniversary, you want him to genuinely do it on his own.

    That's how I feel. I don't want to pressure a girl to sleep with me right away. I want her to genuinely be excited to sleep with me and do it on her own.
    I'd much rather be the guy who she is excited to sleep with than the guy she plays hard to get with.

    • THIS GUY RIGHT HERE IS MHO. DUDE YOU NEED TO DO A MYTAKE TO AWARE FELLA ABOUT GIRLS WHO MAKE THEM WAIT.

    • I never said it was not ok

    • @Bandit74 why do you feel the need to reply to his opinion if you are talking to me? Why didn't you just reply on you opinion instead?

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  • Very good take!

  • Only a minority of guys will get sex on the first few dates or a ONS. most of this is silly for your average Joe.

  • No. 1 was a reason and 2 - 6 looked like they were myths.
    I'd restructure that.
    I would, also, say this is only applicable when on a date. If it's not a date, then one more reason is that she's not into you at all.

    Otherwise, good take.

  • Generally speaking, I will take rejection to mean she's not interested, because that's generally what it means.

    The issue for me is that once I've decided I have non-platonic feelings for her, I won't let her keep the relationship platonic. I will either make it sexual, or let it fall apart.

    I'm sorry that doesn't fit in with your plans. No, I won't change my plans.

  • I have more respect for a woman who would share her body with me sooner than others. It makes me feel entrusted with her.

    Only unfair thing I would assume honestly is just not fair to myself, thinking I somehow might've came off too 'creepy' or negatively affected her in some way.

  • It's sex after one month for me, NO EXCEPTIONS ! I have no patience or time for women who won't put out !

    • So you want a easy girl who puts out after the first date even though you are not her boyfriend?

    • No, but a month is an adequate fair time before sex happens. But I won't hang around a nanosecond longer when there are literally millions of women who will be good girlfriends and take care of me sexually. The days of women witholding sex for an infinite of time are long gone. Trust me, if a woman makes a man wait too long he will leave. And he should !

    • If you rush to have sex with a girl who you are not in a relationship with she will think you only want sex from her I wouldn't blame her

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  • Guys please do not buy this BS mytake so women can use you for time, money, and as an emotional tampon.

    • If your not piping her. You damn well sure some nigga is after your little "date" session with her.

    • You sound bitter

    • Not all women do that You just date the wrong women

  • Since I've never asked girls out and girls never asked me out, I'm certain girls don't like me. I lost my virginity last month. I had mediocre sex with prostitutes. Now I know sex isn't special. It's extremely ordinary and I should've gotten sex for free. I think it's stupid that girls think their vaginas are special. I hate the pimps more for selling girls like commodities. The best part about sex was the oxytocin release after having sex. It lasted for several weeks. Then, the effects wore off last week. Now, I'm depressed again. Fuck this planet. Why are girls the gatekeepers to something so powerful? Why are men allowed to cockblock other men? Why do guys who have nothing to offer the ones that always get laid. Guys worse than me get laid everyday for free and I have to become God in order to get laid. What kind of twisted BS is this? Honestly, the prostitutes benefited from me a lot more than I benefited from them. They all said that my cock was the biggest one they ever had. Their pussies were very tight, warm, soft and wet. Then they got paid by me also, even though they enjoyed the sex more than I did. This planet is too fucked up. I'm not going to tolerate BS like this from girls ever again. I'm going to have sex for free, otherwise I don't care anymore, I'd rather die alone then have a batshit crazy girl fucking with my mind 24/7. I didn't always think like this. I gave every girl a chance to prove me wrong. I was too nice for my own good with girls. Instead, they dropped all their standards for men who were much worse than me. This BS has gone on long enough. I'm going to destroy this planet. I will obliterate Nibiru and Earth in one event. I'm going to create a new human race, one that hasn't been contaminated by evil. I'm going to mold a perfect human girl, I will turn Earth into a good physical world. But before I do that, I need to wipe out all humans that exist today. Enjoy your last breath, humanity.

    • "I should've gotten sex for free" So you think people owe you sex?

    • I don't know. I don't really care anymore.

    • Thats hilarious

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  • I try not to make assumptions. But based on experiences where I deeply emotionally invested with women who never wanted to be sexual, there's just no way I'd ever stick around again if she wasn't enthusiastically sexual, fast.

    I don't know if she's just careful, or a prude, or doesn't like me, or something else. And if it's the first, that's unfortunate.

    But it's too big a red flag, and too many of the potential reasons tell me to run and not look back.

    I -can- wait for sexuality for a long time But I -have- to screen for her sexual interest and enthusiasm early. That doesn't mean first date, but soon And it doesn't mean intercourse.

  • Life is unfair.

    Men will make assumptions about women, the same way that women will make assumptions about men.

    Deal with it.

    The only thing within a guy's power is to not do the kinds of things that may cause women to make reasonable negative assumptions about his personality or the kind of person he is.

    What's outside of a guy's control is trying to grab a loud speaker and broadcast to all females listening that they "should not make 'unfair' assumptions about men."

    Men will make assumptions about women based on what women do, and do not do. Employers will make assumptions about employees. Friends will make assumptions about friends. That's just the way life is.

    • I never said life was fair

  • I only dated three women who didn't want to have sex with me within the first three dates, two were definitely virgins. I never put the slightest pressure on a woman for sex, it's entirely up to her. I wouldn't say they were prudes exactly but sex meant something to them it didn't mean to me and that left them in some trepidation.

    In each case I thought this difference in our views was too great an obstacle to a relationship and I broke it off without sex.

    • The 3rd date is too soon especially if they are not in a relationship

    • Most of my girlfriends, nearly all of them in fact, already knew me and had 'decided on' me. They were friends, co-workers or relations of previous girlfriends. the few who weren't were friends of friends who also knew me before we went out. I never picked girls up.

    • Well I'm not talking about girlfriends I'm talking about if I'm not in a relationship with him but we are going on dates I'm not going to have sex with him. That's just the way I feel

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