Sexual Relationships
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Sex is like Fattening Food For Men Analogy

Sex is like Fattening Food For Men Analogy

One of the most apt comparisons to me that can help women understand why so many of us men have such an obsession and worship of sex and why it can come across as though we enjoy sex more than women do when in fact it's quite the opposite in reality is that sex with a hot women is a little like eating a huge slice of devil's food chocolate cake in which a lot of butter and sugar was used in it's creation.

See, when there's resistance to something whether it be you choosing to resist or the object choosing to resist you, it creates a disproportionate sense of value to you that you only realize is disproportionate once you have it. This is why men guys complain that sex wasn't as great as they thought it would be or why guys tend to disconnect after having sex with a girl for the first time. It doesn't in fact live up to enourmous expectation. Now, this isn't to excuse the piggish guys who always get sex and then leave immediatly after but there's a difference between those guys and the guys who seemed interested in a relationship only to change their mind after finally getting sex (the former never really pretended to want more than sex.) Yes, girls, you were, in fact, not enough in bed to match his fantasies, but it's not your fault.

Sex is like Fattening Food For Men Analogy

So what, right? Your typical girl can't even eat bread based on society's pressures let alone chocolate cake. Your typical guy can't get laid more than a handful of times a year excluding relationship sex. Both are obsessed with what they can't have, but the reason I'm stating the obvious is because you can change the outcome by changing the attitude. You have to act like having sex is not a big deal and is not that important to you. Guys who have sex literally all the time see it as a very normal thing to do. Somewhat more than a hug or a handshake. It doesn't occur to them to obsess over it or worship getting to have sex with that really hot girl. They may see themselves as big pimps in the beginning of newfoudn success with girls but it becomes normal very quickly. It needs to be normal to you as well. Once it's no longer a special thing to do all that resistance you create will dissappear. The girl won't feel like she's giving up this huge thing to you because you won't treat it like it is a huge thing. You won't get as nervous once you realize you have a shot at having sex with this girl. You'll just do it like you'd go in for the hug and your sense of calm and normalcy will translate to her. Girls, more than guys, are affected by the vibes of others. That's why it's important that your vibe is that this is common and normal so that she thinks the same and her own resistance melts.

Here's the ironic drawback: sex with your dream girl won't be this huge victory that gives you this insane grin of satisfaction. In fact, you won't really even have a dream girl. Girls will just be girls to you. Sometimes you just talk to them. sometimes you have sex with them it doesn't matter either way. you'll get to orgasm much more frequently through actual intercourse which of course will be a lot of fun but there won't be a huge sense of accomplishment or validation. the reward is literally friction.

But to be a guy who has sex with lots of girls gives you a whole new lease on life. Once you realize how easy it is to have sex with girls if you just calm down about it, then you'll start having girls actually pushing you to get into relationships (especially if you get good at sex.) So, if you are a relationship guy you can now pick the right girl for you instead of waiting for someone to just accept you and date you like you're some orphan of the dating world. If you like variety and hate intmacy and don't have time for commitment you can constantly have new experiences and get to know all different kinds of women. Just be careful protection wise but you will because you'll always have condoms on you because sex is like taking showers...just something you do pretty frequently.

So, boys, eat that chocolate cake until it no longer holds so much temptation for you and then realize it just to be cake...

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm not sure if it's what you intended, but this article has made me want more cake and sex!

    Actually I think this is a good article. But then, in a way, it's like telling someone to relax. There are very deep reasons why people are the way they are, perhaps stemming back through 30 years of unconscious habits and childhood trauma. You tell these men not to care about sex, but really, sex is about validation, a sense that you're worthwhile and valuable to others. People have deep wounds and issues with self esteem, that need a lot of hard work. To whom a certain facet of life, be it success in any front, comes relatively easily, there's a tendency to also see it as straight forward as for every one else. But lo, a different, more meandering path, where one often goes awry, beckons for another.

    • i like the way you write. I like it a lot. I do feel, however, that what you're proposing isn't quite fair to the woman. She shouldn't have to heal his wounds with her vagina unless that's what she wants to do. i personally think seeing a therapist is a better solution to the problems you're identifying.

Most Helpful Girl

  • "Girls will just be girls to you. Sometimes you just talk to them. sometimes you have sex with them it doesn't matter either way. you'll get to orgasm much more frequently through actual intercourse"

    So how does any of this actually get you good sex, because all I hear is that men have a problem with reality matching fantasy (in my view because so many of you get your sexual gratification through a screen and your dick doesn't know what a real pussy feels like, just your own hand) and that if you act like sex isn't anything then you won't get disappointed when it happens.

    Pavlove, this is really depressing "advice" which only seems to make sex boring for all involved. Lower the bar but get more? Is it really quantity over quality?

    • no it's not about lowering the bar it's about not worshipping the bar. when you think in terms of "getting lucky" then yeah when you get "to feel a real pussy" it's like omg my life is so amazingggg because you feel like you've done something insanely special/lucky. when you have sex regularly it won't feel like getting lucky it will just feel like a Tuesday. this has nothing to do with the quality of the sex, but rather how much importance you put on it.

    • It's about putting the pussy on a pedestal, or not doing so but you've made it sound like you're telling people to just have lots of mediocre sex just for the sake of it.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • there's no woman that can't eat bread. yours have to know beyond nothing about nutrition to think that way. and cake is nothing like sex. there's no comparison. i don't even like cake. i dont see why you need to give women a comparison as if women dont love sex. women are the ones who get called sluts fort loving sex. so obviously we know how great sex is if were willing to put up with that bullshit.

    • claws outttt

  • Finally, a sensible mytake. Sex is naturally high risk for females. That makes it important that they determine who they sleep with with caution. After all, if they choose the wrong male, that's 9 months of wasted reproduction time. The difference is, in modern times, sex is significantly less risk for females than it used to be. If they're open to abortions and take birth control, then there's not nearly as much reason to fear sex.

    Though, even if sex became no-risk for females, they would still approach the concept with caution. Especially when society looks down on 'overly' sexual women, as women are typically highly influenced by society--more so than males--to determine the right male to sleep with and the wrong ones. After all, a male's worth is more accurately determined by majority opinion. They would still have the instinct of being overly cautious in who they sleep with. In general.

    Though. The difference remains. Sex is mental for females. Sex is a physical urge for males. I wouldn't go so far to say sex is like a bit more than hugs. But it is a very natural, normal thing. Namely because sex is pretty much no-risk for males. Although, it's more risky than it used to be, given child support and the fact that they have no control over whether or not a female that gets pregnant keeps the baby or not.

    Whereas females usually only want sex from someone they 'love', meaning they have to be mentally invested to really want sex; sex is more a bodily function for males. An attractive woman is all it takes, no matter how much males scream personality. Though, we're not immune from social influence either, especially when it comes to female desires. After all, if we ignored female desires, then we wouldn't get laid. "Yeah! Totally! No. I definitely don't believe in sex before marriage!" /in the hopes of eventually having sex.

    It all boils down to economics. When you have more of a product (near infinite sperm), it becomes cheap, when you have less of a product, it becomes expensive (eggs). Incidentally, this also influences male and female value in society. Women having innate value and males must prove they have value. Male lives are cheap. Females aren't.

    So. Sex is higher risk for males than it used to be, and lower risk for females than it used to be. Eventually, we'll even out. If only damn STD's didn't get in the way. Hopefully we can cure them all and create a 100% method of non-absitance to have sex with as many and whomever we wish.

  • I think it's so immature for men to think that somehow women not immediately giving them sex is all about them and what they lack. It just goes to show how narrow minded and selfish some men can be. Women are just different. We love sex too, but we're created and wired differently - there is no reason to take that personally. All a man has to do if he wants sex without all the drama of chasing it, is settle down with a woman who thinks he's hot.

    • a lot of men also want variety... you don't always want chocolate cake sometimes coconut cake sometimes lemon cake sometimes red velvet

    • Well they have to be realistic about it. It all depends on the man and how attractive he is in the eyes of women... but even in spite of really feeling attracted to a man recently, because I got the vibe that he slept around, I didn't bother. So maybe it's this that makes them NOT get the variety they crave. It's more acceptable in younger men, but in my case, when a guy is in his 40's acting like a 20 year-old, it's hard to overlook lol

    • lol you mean you're not a cougar? :( Damn it! ;))

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  • Hahahaha Hilarious comparison.

    Seems like a sequel to a mytake that said - "Sex is just like hugs." -which I just can't agree on. o. O

    • hmmmm question... whens the last time you had a chocolate cake?

    • Can't remember... Not that into chocolate to be honest.

    • You, madam, have just made my point.

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  • I'm a girl and I think I'd actually prefer sex over any food at any time lol

    • stop ruining my examples

  • Wow, without reading the take, the title and picture made me want cake and sex..

    • Wow wow

    • @Green_Block86 haha

    • @IdkimJustMe I was referring to something. on your photo

  • I suppose you could call me something of a mild feminazi. I'm the first girl to bite a man's face off when he says something about sex and women I find ignorant. I used to hate porn, (though now because after a year of the same sexual partner whom I love and am incredibly attracted to, I want to bring some porn into the relationship). I can't stand men and their sexualities. My man has a lot to put up with, but he loves me so I'm a lucky woman.
    But, this Take made good sense to me. I found nothing offensive in it, and I enjoyed the analogy. It's very straight forward and informative. Great Take, and I totally agree with every bit.

    • Thank you!

    • You are everything you hate, it would be kind of funny if it wasn't so sad.

  • I guess you can say that though there are way more tasty correctly cooked cakes. Than there are guys that are good at sex to cause the woman to orgasm. Cakes pleasure women more than they do from sex. Due to rushing into to just fucking which majority of the time is why it's so bad. The dudes suck at fully turning the chick on. They only care about their pleasure and not trying to pleasure the chick at all or make it enjoyable. So in that case most guys are like horrible tasting cakes that make you want to throw up. They put nothing extra good to make it any good when they don't care as long as their getting what they want.

    • Nah most guys love pleasuring women they just don't understand how exactly to do that. The male and female sexual response is so different it's nearly impossible to intuitively understand the other person. Which is why it's so important for women to properly communicate what they enjoy and how they enjoy it, if the men your sleeping with are rushing through sex in your opinion then it's on you to communicate that, you can't blame a man for not having a female sexual response. Expecting men to be mind readers, then being frustrated with them when it turns out that mind reading is impossible is a really stupid way to try and get what you want.

    • @Jager66 sometimes when the chick doesn't really communicate with the guy that can mean she's not truly into the guy. That or doesn't know what to ask since they don't know. The guys should also ask the girls what feels good and ask them if they want to try different things. Which if the guy never thinks of 4 play ever. That's not really going to arouse the chick to much. Women do love the teasing just doesn't seem like guys do that. They just let the women do all the teasing.

    • If your having sex with someone your not into and choose not to communicate then the bad sex is your fault. If you don't have any idea what feels good to you sexually then that is your fault. If you don't communicate that you don't know what you do or don't like that is your fault. Yep guys need to communicate too for sure! but it's not his job to pry it out of you, it's your job to offer the information. Also plenty of women, in my experience, do not like it when a guy is constantly asking "do you like this", it's much more sexy to simply say "harder", "slower","lick my ****" etc... If what you want from a partner is someone who is constantly asking "do you like this" then it's on you to tell him to do that. Of course it's easy for men to blow past foreplay, the sexual response is very different in men. A man can have really good sex with an amazing orgasm by diving straight into the deep end from the word GO. Don't expect men to be mind readers.

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  • Hahah this is amazing😂

    • ... i feel like i remember you but i dont know who you are..

    • Okay😂😂

    • I'm pretty sure we've argued in the past

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  • I just clicked on this because of cake.

    • Same

    • proving my point lol

    • lol me too

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  • Yeah, it' so true :P

  • There's nothing wrong with anything in moderation, but I think this just explains why men masturbate more than women. If desire for cake exceeds amount of cake in your cupboard then eat a chocolate biscuit or some lower level of chocolate-based gratification. If you're happy to just go out and buy more cake (or sleep around with people who are willing to accommodate) then so be it but in this analagy it can't be healthy right?

    • perhaps but i think there's a lot of judgement associated with it. it's not like men are eating chocolate cakes everyday but when we do we don't have any judgement about it. It's that push and pull... that resistance that creates more attraction to it. I think if a woman thought nothing of eating the chocolate cake it would be less tempting. It's the fact she makes it so forbidden that leads to lowkey cake worship

    • but there is no emotional element to eating chocolate cake, yes it creates a feeling inside, but nobody is going to judge you on how often you eat chocolate cake (unless it becomes an obsession or damages your health) and your favourite chocolate cake is not going to be upset if you eat a chocolate biscuit for a quick fix.

  • This is how I "see" movies lol, I don't like watching trailers or knowing to much about a movie I'm interested in watching because I don't want to be let down... Kinda... Good comparison/explanation I liked it.

  • That cake looks so fucking good

    • Don't it though?

  • I guess you are right, nice Take :)

  • I see things differently.

    I think the whole stereotype that women don't like sex as much as men is a lie. Women don't like mediocre sex just as much as men don't like mediocre sex, and women love good sex just as much as men love good sex. The only difference between men and women is that men are largely terrible at sex, but at the same time, relatively easily satisfied.

    Once a guy becomes good in bed, he'll realize that there's more than enough women wanting good sex (and not getting it) to keep him satisfied.

    • Correction... not just satisfied, exhausted.

    • I think maybe you misunderstood my point. My thing is that women love sex but because they can get it abundantly without much obstacle they don't value you it the same way even though they love it and get it more. Men love chocolate cake but because we can eat usually without getting fat (or even if we do get a little pudgy who cares) there isn't this sense of OMG CAKE! Ironically, we eat a lot more cake than most women do and so we get more joy out of it, but we don't worship it. I agree with your ideas and like the thinking.

    • No, I think I got your point. My point is still that there is huge difference between regular sex and exceptional sex for women, and since exceptional sex is extremely hard to find, women will value it perhaps even more than men do.

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  • I don't really see it in those terms but then again i don't really like analogies outside of fiction tbh. Too muddy when talking about cake

    • Lol! Omg i meant to say "when talking about facts!" That cake just looks so fucking good

  • "Guys who have sex literally all the time see it as a very normal thing to do."

    .. because it is, I don't see why you all treat it as some sort of sacred ritual.

    • media mostly

    • And society too!

  • What if you like having sex with women, but aren't into having relationships, but you also aren't into dumping women when they get too attached to you, or stringing them along, or otherwise hurting their feelings so that you can fuck them occasionally?

    • there are plenty of girls who feel like you feel and don't want commitment but they require you to go out to be bars and nightclubs mostly

  • So basically dehumanize your sexual partners and render them as generic pieces of meat.

    Wai... Wh... Ah fuck.

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