Sexual Relationships
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Sex Games, Flip Side: Alpha Male FTW

So, a few days ago, I wrote up a MyTake called "Sex Games: Girls, You Have To Let Us Win Occasionally."

Boy, that went over well, didn't it? ;)

As expected, it got quite a few replies...and few were complimentary. But thank you, fellow GaGers, because it means I win my bet. Well, sort of. Let's just say I wrote it for a friend, who is always - repeat: always - whining about striking out with women, and he got this goofy idea in his head that if he acted all put-upon and depressed about it, those same women would suddenly find him attractive. My response to that? Kevin Butler's reaction at the end of this commercial:

Okay, so, his reasoning just revolved around the hurt puppy dog technique. If he played the despondent "oh, why are women always so mean to me" card, he thought he could actually get laid more often. Sort of like this:

"I can't believe I can't get a woman to like me...what's wrong with me?"

"Oh, nothing's wrong with you!"

"Then how come nobody wants to be with me? 'a little tear' I just don't understand."

"You poor thing...here, put your head between my breasts and you'll feel better."

WTF, that can't happen.

Problem with all this is, while I kind of understand what he's saying (it might appeal to the woman's more caring nature, I suppose), I'm convinced all women hear are variations of this:

Nah, no thanks. I don't play that. Women respond to forthrightness, candidness and yes, even a healthy stock of confidence. Just admit it, girls, you do. The "Alpha Male" might be the guy who gets slammed on a daily basis online but he might also be the guy who gets a ton of pussy, too. Am I that guy? No, but I'm simply comparing one method/personality to another here. And I think I'm right.

The Don Drapers of the world get the chicks. Or at least versions of him.

Sex Games, Flip Side: Alpha Male FTW

It's not about complaining. It's not about getting all down on yourself. Women don't mind sentimental dudes, of course, but I think they start to roll their eyes when you basically beg them for mercy. Hell, most of you ladies were rolling your eyes - with words - in those comments, right? And if you're being honest - yeah, honest - you're going to freely admit that guys who flat-out say, "yeah, I like you and I want you" have a better shot than the guy who whines about how other girls never give him a fair shake.

And hey, everyone's definition of "alpha male" seems to be different.

I just know that honesty is far more effective when paired with confidence, as opposed to honesty paired with self-loathing. Unless you girls would like to take issue...?

And by the way, props to Stacyzee for being the GaG Editor of the Week! You should read some of her great stuff if you haven't already.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I posted this on some other sundry "bad boy"-related thread, but, relevant:

    My boy is cold steel nails. He was thrown away by 2 different families, was shit out onto the streets at 15, and is hard as fuck. He doesn't have very many friends. He smiles maybe quarterly, and his dick gets hard when women cry.

    Our relationship was a LDR for the first year. One of the times when I went to see him, I arrived at his place earlier than expected, walked into the open door, and saw him hunched over a tiny baby bird. Something had hit it or injured it in some way, and this bad-ass motherfucker was nursing that tiny baby bird back to life.

    Right there I found this big-ass heart inside my own self, bigger than I'd ever known. And it was straight melted, into putty, lemme tellya.

    Been married to him for almost 15 years now (and you girls oughta see that man holding babies... oh jesus christ ::fans self::). I'm more extreme than most in my needs for that whole dark triad thing, but, yeah.

    You gotta have the yin and the yang, and neither means anything without the other. That's the name of the game.

    We want sensitivity, but sensitivity doesn't mean anything unless it has something to be contrasted with.

    Here's another way to look at it: WE want to ACTUALLY FEEL UNIQUE AND SPECIAL with that man.
    If a man acts like a sappy fool with everyone and everything... well, where does that leave us? No more special than any other chick on the street, that's where. Not special. Whoops.
    THAT ^^ is the appeal of a man who is, frankly, kind of a dick most of the time, if he's a decent human being to us. It makes us feel special. See, that's not actually that hard to understand, isn't it?

    Yes, this even applies if we are special girl no. 276 in the last five years. Doesn't matter. Emotions don't have memories like that. <3

    • "We want sensitivity, but sensitivity doesn't mean anything unless it has something to be contrasted with." I knew it. ;)

    • I guess that saying is true, girls want a bad boy who is good just for them while guys want a good girl who is bad just for them.

    • @Bandit74 Also good with kids, and animals, and old people, and the vulnerable. I mean, I'm not THAT selfish, lol.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • "Women respond to forthrightness, candidness and yes, even a healthy stock of confidence"

    Yes, it is true. I am extremely picky with whom I date, or even it's really few men who actually attract me... But when they do, I'm swept off my feet, and these few do have that in common...
    - Confidence
    - Fit
    - Sweet/charming personality.

    Your statement couldn't be more right.

  • Everyone has a different viewpoint/definition on the gag swear word a**** thus, making it a perfect storm for a gag argument lol. To me, it just means someone more attractive/intelligent/charismatic than others, thus more successful in life, in political elections, in business, in dating, etc. etc.

    • "Everyone has a different viewpoint/definition on the gag swear word a**** thus, making it a perfect storm for a gag argument" Exactly. ;)

    • It's really great you realize that. Tons of gaggers just start fighting like children and get butt hurt over literally nothing, it's ok for us all to have various viewpoints.

    • Sure it is! It's a fun way of interacting, that's all. Nobody should ever take it personally; for crying out loud, this is the Internet. ;)

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  • Lmaoo herewego. jpeg "Alpha" means not caring about anyone else and just doing your own thing and "alpha/beta" is based on strong/weak concept and ofcourse people would prefer stronger people OP. But if you relating this to chicks, you aren't really "alpha" lol and if some chick wanna be chased like that, she's prolly still 12 or still think she is so you won't wanna be with em neither lol

    • As I said, Alpha means a lot of different things to a lot of different people, and if you haven't heard it used by guys in relation to girls, you haven't been getting out enough. ;)

    • Brah I am 6'3 215 bench 225 for 8 reps and squat over 400 for one rm. I am what you dream to be son lol and girls? Bet I pull more in hour than any of these nerds can in all their life lol but alpha ain't that OP

    • I'm 6'3 as well but I'm obviously in better cardio condition at 185 and a resting heart rate of about 50, and I'll still out-squat and out-curl you..."brah." But I'm sorry, I missed the point of your comment. Which was? That your definition of "alpha male" is the only one that matters?

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  • If I see another alpha male bullshit myTake, bricks will be shat.

  • I'm gonna ignore the alpha male part of it.

    Women respond with kindess and sympathy to sad, weak things. Because they have maternal instincts.

    They don't want to fuck these sad weak things though.

    Nature demanded, -demanded- that women take from strong men, and give to weak children.

    So women can be sensitive and caring and supportive. Or they can be impressed and filled with admiration. But they only want to fuck in one of those two scenarios.

  • Don Draper spent most of the show as a miserable, lonely alcoholic who eventually wrecked his career, relationships and respect of his children. He had two awful marriages and ended up chasing a mediocre looking and despondent waitress to Minnesota because he was so empty,

    Why do people choose him as an example?

    • Wow, thanks for ruining the whole seasons I haven't watched! lol But hey, he is/was still very charming :) that's why he is used as an example. hehe

    • So sorry! I should have put a spoiler warning! There is still so much to see - most of what I wrote could be guessed as inevitable in the first episode, haha, Best Show Ever!

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