Sexual Relationships
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Dirty V-Day Cards That Might Help You Get Laid

Valentine's Day is projected as a day where romance and appreciation takes place. One can draw that conclusion, by looking around at their surroundings. They will see flowers, candies, and gifts being displayed as a way to profess one's love.
When I reflect back at the very beginning of my relationship, it's hard to ignore one of the personality traits that wheeled me in. I remember that my partner's sense of humor was one of the things that appealed to me the most.
I am a person that at times takes life too seriously. My partner's ability to make light of situations and find humor in them, is one of the personality traits I love about him the most. Life is highly stressful at times, so much so, that often times we forget to laugh.
If you're a person that loves to laugh as much as I do, then you will enjoy these Valentine's Day printables I have below.
Even if you don't have a Valentine, I am pretty sure there's someone in your life (a sibling, parent, friend) that you can give this to as a joke, as you perfectly seal it in an envelope.
Who knows? maybe having this type of humor will leave you closer to getting laid out.
Don't worry, I'll carry the bandages, icepacks, and medical equipment!


<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

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Dirty V-Day Cards That Might Help You Get Laid

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Oh my! What a way to remember some of our favorite childhood movies, and music artists.
Don't say, I didn't warn you (points to the title of this article).
Which card will you be printing out as a Valentine's Day joke?
If you choose not to, which card made you laugh or give an expressive reaction the most?
Even if you're single this Valentine's Day, remember your outlook is what gives you your entire perception of those 24 hours.
Are you going to be moby doby or full of life with a positive attitude?

Happy Valentine's Day!

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Haha, these are fucking awesome.

    Girrrlll I have a 4-year-old, a 7-year-old, and a (in a couple days) 13-year-old. Why you gotta ruin my perfectly pure mind RIGHT NOW.
    Of all the times.

    lol

    • She did it now to give you time to get it back in order before V-Day. Of course, someone will probably come along and screw it up again. lol

Most Helpful Guy

  • Wow i'll never look at Disney the same way again lol

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Hahaha OMG I seriously Laughed out loud & Blushed! These are crazy but hilarious. Thanks for sharing. :)

  • that's funny...
    :)

  • ahaha yesss i love these this made my night! although i will admit for some reason the d, u, and i one took me a long time to get - i couldn't understand it was a joke about his DUI lol. the little mermaid song was literally made for this. i want to print a bunch of these to give to my boyfriend... i can just make him a collage lolol

  • lol, childhood=ruined. :P

  • Hahahaahahahahhahaahhahaa

    I love puns.
    I fucken love puns.
    Oh man they were all so brilliant!

  • These are great!

  • Childhood Ruined ;_;

  • I love your sense of humor!

  • My oh my , aren't we naughty :p :p :p

  • I can only think of anti-Valentines using my character stock:

    Lemon Witch: "I ain't writing you THAT kind of fic!"

    Ciem: "I have 12 legs, and you're getting NONE!"

    Katrina Cantina: "I don't need YOUR paintbrush!"

    Zwingli the Iguana: "Screw it, babe! I'm gonna tongue-flick somewhere else!"

    Gray Champion: "This sword... is not meant for you!"

    Liquidon: "You're not the cure I'm looking for!"

    Lobster: "My gears would stall if you cranked."

    Volkonir: "Forget it! I was never THAT kind of toy!"

    Col. Flix: "It's all very academic, but the simple answer is no!"

    Yes, these are mean rejection cards. But... best I can get you.

  • so many dirty thoughts from disney 😂😂

  • Haha, I always love these.

  • I actually made a few of there for my ex last Valentine's day

  • Hahaha. They're certainly funny, but I think some of them might actually PREVENT you from getting laid, lol.

    • Lol, notice I said "laid out" in the first paragraph

  • NUMBER TWO
    NUMBER FIFTEEN
    NUMBER TEN

  • *sounds of obnoxious laughter mixed with choking*.

  • Very funny, but cool Take, as always ;)

  • I put one of these on Facebook and girls found it offensive. 😳

    • Really? I'd find it funny

    • I'm single and girls don't like what I find funny I guess.

    • Which one was it?

    • Show All

  • Oh boy these are just pure gold...

  • Wow
    Got one similar to this from my fiance. He was giggling while I read it

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