It's the big deal in these times for a lot of guys to think lesbians having sex is hot, but it really does not do anything for me, no. Neither do bi girls either. Don't get me wrong, I've known some lesbians and even if I don't agree with them I still don't care about what they do, and I don't hate them. But it's not sexy to me to see two women kissing or having sex, nor does it impress me that a woman could show she can have sexual feelings toward her own gender either.
I think my gripe is mostly with bi's and straight women who like to flirt with lesbianism. True lesbians do what they do and don't try to make an example of it or try to depict their sexuality as sexy for the most part. In fact a lot of true lesbians keep their sex lives private and personal. To me a lot of the bi and lesbianism of these times is mostly trendiness. Female homosexuality is depicted as sexy, especially since a lot of guys think so, and porn is overflowing with it, so it's like a lot of women are going with that.
Women are said to be "more sexually flexible"...
I remember reading some studies last year that said that the reason so many women are gay and bi nowadays is because women are more sexually flexible than men, and even noted how the majority of 'pansexuals' (people who basically have no racial or gender preference in who they fuck) and people with other types of diverse sexualities are women. I think that idea is really just meant to glamorize lesbianism and bisexuality, encourage it, and make women seem more sexually superior to men - if not to also encourage it to satisfy guys who like it. It's funny though. Guys who sleep with many, many people and have no hangups about their sex lives and sexcapades are often joked as "fucking anything that moves," yet women are the ones fucking anything that moves and we're all just calling it being "more sexually flexible." Just because a woman will have sex with anybody regardless of who or what they are doesn't spell flexibility to me, nor is it impressive, noble, or significantly sexually intelligent either. And if women really are like this, that would actually mean they're more sexually focused and driven than men. Society's contradictory thought-processes can be both amazing and appalling at the same time.
It's also been researched that among women who watch porn, lesbian porn is the No.1 search for both gay and straight women. There was also one study done where a number of men and women watched both gay and lesbian porn, and both the men and women thought the lesbian porn was way hotter than watching two guys go at it. Women have been taught so much that their gender is sexier to the point where they can watch themselves fucking each other and finding it hot.
A lot of straight women do say they feel their own gender is sexier than the male. There's a thought process in many where they can look at their own gender and feel that it’s more appealing. Some women have been angered by me noting this, yet often prove my point when they themselves say they think women are sexier because of their curvy figures in comparison to the straighter, harder figure of the male, basically with the idea, “Yeah, I can see how guys think we’re sexy.” What's also odd to me is that it's just fine for women to see the physical appeal in their own gender - and can even be vocal about it, but feel it would be “shallow” or only being focused on looks to see it in men, and would much rather see sexiness in their female gender than to see it in guys. Basically women are fine being "visual" with each other, but to be visual with men - or admitting it anyway - is what they see as showing weakness for them as women. It really just seems to come down to that egotistical issue: women like being seen as sexy or sexier than men, and like entertaining it by even declaring a sex appeal that they themselves see in their own gender. So they like entertaining the supposed science of women being more sexually flexible because it implies an ability or quality that would be superior to men. They're not really more flexible and don’t really desire women more, they just like the image that the idea gives them.
Insecurity...
But to be honest, I think the root of bisexuality and lesbianism is insecurity in most of those women. And a lot of women have turned to it out of frustration with guys or because they're not getting good sex from them, so instead of trying to work with men and learn to understand them as their opposite, women would rather just turn to other women because "women understand each other better." Some women have tried to tell me gay guys are the same way, but I really don't think so. Sure, you may have some like that, but the vast majority of gay men tend to be sincere about it, feeling like that's really who they are. I have only ever once in my life heard about a guy turning gay out of frustration with women. It is far more common for a woman to do that than a man I think. Some people even use the excuse that women who turned gay did so because of past sexual abuse. Maybe for some, but using a history of sexual abuse to explain away everybody's present behaviors and choices is just too much of an easy way out.
It seems to be that straight women who have sex with other women yet claim to still be straight is that they simply don't have the courage to be a woman with a man, or are too proud to be. I’ve talked to a lot of women like this online and that's basically what it boils down to, at least from my experience. I remember talking to one about it for days on Experience Project who pretty much admitted that was her case, and she felt "inspired" by me to take a second look and re-think her attitude toward guys. They don't know how to woman up and communicate with men or even try to learn about men, so they’d rather just get frustrated and blame the guy’s performance in bed. Women like this aren't up to the challenge. They’re too proud to face differences and too proud to try to work with a man in the way they want him to do for them, so their pride tells them they'd rather just get satisfaction from other women because “women understand each other better” before they will humble themselves and have to do some work with men.
So, no. I don't find anything sexy about a woman who does or would sleep with other women. None of it says to me that there is anything impressive or intimately profound about a woman who will have sex with all kinds of people. It says that she allows herself to be used by them in a blind notion that she’s more flexible, when she's really just doing them a favor more than she’s doing for herself. In the new age scientific communities, men are said to be more close-minded and singular for not having this “flexibility” that women have, and I laugh at that. We straight men don’t want or need to be able to screw just about anybody regardless of their gender. Men want women and have sex with them because that's what we like, want, and are attracted to. We don't feel that we need or want more than that, and I will unapologetically say that we are often more secure in our sexuality and desires and know what we want, and are satisfied with that. Women being “more open” to sleeping with other women ultimately seems like a lame excuse for a woman’s lack of understanding sex or even understanding her own self, not understanding it more in some sexually profound ability.
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