Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
A while back I wrote an article describing in erotic detail things I wish I had known when I was very new to having sexual experiences with girls. It got a little bit of attention and I was asked to do one for girls. So after spending a few weeks doing absolutely nothing else with my life, I decided to take a shower and write this Take.
Lower your expectations
In a way, I feel for girls. I think most girls have this image in their heads where their first time should go like a scene in a Disney movie where they are wearing a beautiful dress and a strong, charming man carries her into a soft and beautiful bed in a wonderfully cute and cozy room and then the image changes to a blossoming flower where everything is very nice and pleasurable.
Let me tell you how it's more likely to go down: You're probably gonna look slightly better than you have all month, a guy you have a budding romance with makes you feel really pretty and attracted to him which makes you go to his room messy room (which probably smells like a sock) where you two fool around until he undresses you puts it in too quickly and you have no idea if you want to make him stop or keep going because you really want both.
Then when it's all over you start hating yourself and the guy who you did it with having remembered how it was supposed to be.
That's probably like every story averaged together. So just realize it's not gonna be perfect. Your first time is gonna suck (unless you keep reading). Plus, if you just lower them, you might find yourself to be pleasantly surprised. Either way don't worry to much because no matter how your first time goes down, no one can ever rightfully say anything bad about you because of how it went down.
Fight for yourself
The thing that's really messed up about first times is that it's really easy for a girl to do a good job, but it's pretty hard for a guy to do a good job. Make no mistake, a women's body can be just as confusing as the woman itself. Some guys are partially horrified their first time and it's the confident ones you really want to be scared of. I once stuck myself in and I just kinda jammed it in and the girl literally couldn't go on. I had to wait like a week before she wanted to go again.
You gotta tell the guy what to do because as confused you may be as to what to do, there's plenty of stuff that guys will never ever think of because we just don't understand. You gotta tell the guy to go in slow. If he just tries to stick it in and you haven't "relaxed" yet, get him to give you oral or finger you or something. Don't let the guy do something stupid that will make you enjoy yourself less and understand that he has no clue how to make you feel good.
Relax
I'm not just talking about your pussy. Take some deep breaths, visualize how you want things to go down realistically what your gonna want to do when he does certain things. I understand that you may not feel comfortable moaning or something and I totally get that. But if that's your thing, don't totally conceal it. Maybe suppress it only a little. Not because the guy won't like it but because maybe it's a little hard for you to come all the way out of your shell your first time.
Try not to cover yourself up and remind yourself that the whole reason this is happening is because this man is genuinely attracted to YOU. He is nervous of YOUR attractiveness. let your legs relax, try to keep calm. If you want to put your hands on him, do it. My first time, I gave the girl oral and she liked it so much she literally grabbed my hair and pushed my face into her. I didn't think it was weird, I thought, "Shit, I guess she likes it." If she sat there doing nothing, fighting the urge to do it, I would have thought something was wrong and it could have made things awkward.
You're not kinky yet
I can't tell you how many times I've gotten to a point with a girl where I start asking her what she may be into (there's a lot of different ways to ask this) and she says something like "Oh me? I'm a freak, I'm bi, I wanna do (something nonspecific)" and then we spend a relationship in missionary.
Now here's the thing. I think porn has a way of making people think that we can just want to be tied up and teased for 20 minutes straight and that's how it will play out because we decided that's what we wanted. I really want a hot pastrami sandwich on Rye but I still gotta do something to make it happen.
If you get into this talk with a guy, don't tell him your a freak or that your into this or that when you have done it twice or not at all. You gotta tell the guy that you have always wanted to try it or something because then he will know that he has to find the right pace to try new things with you. Basically your making it so that it's two people exploring what they like rather than a guy getting disappointed one day when you get mad at him for talking dirty. I've been on the amateur side of this one believe it or not and looking back I wish I had known this.
Different guys like different things
One thing I've noticed about girls is that they all have different little things that they do. I don't feel like getting graphic right now but it's little things and I have always wondered why because some girls seem to do very specific little things. Now I think I figured out why. When a girl has her first time or two, the first guy who she's with sort of programs her. He tells her what he likes and she carries the advice on for the rest of her sex life because doesn't realize that what she's doing is a specific thing, she thinks that's just how you do it. Or maybe that it's like a special trick she knows now or something.
Don't get me wrong, it's not necessarily a turn off. But just keep in mind that it's always good to try to figure out what the guy likes by trying different things. It could be something as simple as how many fingers you jerk him off with or if you handle his balls or something. Something one guy absolutely hates may be something that turns someone else on like crazy.
The Head
Everyone knows how easy it is to sexually satisfy a man. But the basics aren't always enough for girls to feel like they are doing things right. Well just like a vagina, the penis has it's ins and outs.
First of all there's the head, the very top. It's kinda sensitive you should avoid touching it directly with your hand. It's hard to explain, your not gonna necessarily gonna do anything bad by touching it but lets just say that you can do more harm than good. What you CAN do with it is put it in your mouth or use your tong to play with it. That will pretty much always feel good.
The Shaft
You know what really sucks about men? They cum to quickly. Some of us are lucky because we can keep going immediately after but some guys may need a minute and others might be ready to fall asleep (to be fair, I think all guys get that sometimes). Either way, you should know how to touch it and not immediately make a man cum.
here's the shaft, it has no sexual arousal value other than the fact that it's a penis and a girl's touching it. Okay, so that's an exaggeration but let me explain. Basically when you jerk a guy off you need a good lose grip. Not too hard not too soft. I would say start off soft and get harder until he seems to not like it and then back off a little. The top is the sensitive part, the bottom isn't so much but if he's close to cumming it can still finish the job.
Know when to stop
Here's a big one. When a guy cums not from sex but from a BJ or a hand job or something, it's like an instant fatigue. You wanna keep going while he's cumming but once it stops coming out, just slow down and do whatever your gonna do to clean it up. Which reminds me-
Help him clean up
I get it, cum is gross and you don't want any more of it in your mouth than needed. But when the guy cums he needs your help. Here's something that happens to me all the time. I forget to bring something to wipe the ater effects with and the girl just kinda sits there waiting for me to do something, or worse, she tries to help and lets go of my dick, letting the rest out.
Have a towel off to the side, or help him get something to clean himself up with no one expects you to KNOW WHAT TO DO, but it's good to remember that he's gonna cum and your gonna have to deal with that so try to be prepared because if he's anything like me, he's gonna forget.
Dirty talk
Talk dirty to him, tell him he has a big dick or that you want it inside you or something. Don't freak out if he calls you something "bad" he's not calling you his slut because he thinks you are one. Show him you want him, you can moan. One thing that really annoys me is that sometimes I feel like I'm doing all the work. So don't be afraid to initiate the dirty talk. If your shy even ask him if he likes what your doing. Literally say "You like that?" and that right there is a super casual thing to say during sex to help make sure every things going right and unlike when a guy says it to a girl, it's usually pretty hot.
Bones tip (pun intended)
Have some alcohol before you do the deed. Not a lot, just a light buzz. Take a shot, a beer or two. It will take the sharp edge off but keep you concerned enough that you don't do anything stupid. The most important thing is to relax and have fun. Be interested in his enjoyment and be interested in your enjoyment. Oh and for God's sake, please bring condoms, it's so much easier for you to hold them then guys.
Hopefully this made sense and helped some people and made them feel a little more confident in themselves. Let me know what you think. Did you know these things your first times?
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