Why I Admire Cheaters

I don't think I would actually ever cheat on someone, but it is a tempting idea to me. I like it because...it seems to be the ultimate taboo. It's like the ultimate NO. It's irresistible. I do think cheaters definitely come off as really selfish but I admire them in a way. Just a little. Because they did the ultimate. The ultimate betrayal. The ultimate lie. The ultimate heartbreak. Even if it's cruel, they still did it. Knowing everyone would hate them, I think you honestly have to be pretty tough to be able to do that. Or drunk and selfish but still, to not care that much about how other people feel, it's interesting.

Why I Admire Cheaters

I have people like this in my family, and I do not get why they're so stable. Like instead of being shattered when someone dislikes or hates them, they just do not care. And I don't mean that they hide their hurt; they'll just laugh at the person or insult them, and feel like 'if anything how dare the person insult them?'

I've always envied that. So, after reading the comments from people talking about how awful cheaters are, I just started remembering all of that. I'm not saying it's right to hurt people. Just that cheaters may not be awful. Or if they are, that may not matter. Lots of their partners want them back, and the people like that in my family get plenty of respect from everyone even if they have horrible reps.

People insulting you, breaking the rules, but not caring...it may not be the cheaters who suffer the most but their ex partners. Like it's not breaking the rules that hurts you but taking them so seriously that does. Because when things finally fail, it's the people who can't handle that trust or just the established rules being broken who are hurt the most. Not the people who get insulted or who do the rule breaking, and that's so interesting to me.

Like even writing this was a bit hard because I can imagine the comments and stories people will share but I wanted to share my perspective, too. I like not having to always make things so...like appeasing to the people who read it you know?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I for one admire:
    - Honest people
    - People who don't run away from problems but face them head on
    - People who aren't afraid to break up with their partner
    - People who aren't afraid of being single/alone
    - People who are self-aware
    - People who refuse to hurt others
    - People who have self-control
    - People who are worthy of trusting because they make sure to never do something that will make you distrust them
    - People who don't go behind other people's backs
    - People who are straightforward, not two-faced

    You'd have to be quite the sociopath in order to hurt someone and not care about it. I don't understand why that would ever be an admirable trait for a sane person.

Most Helpful Guy

  • What's next? Are you gonna admire murderers cause they did the ultimate thing a human should do: kill another human?

    This Take sucks.

    • Fully agreed!

    • Mentally ill people... I'm not talking about them.

    • You don't have to be mentally ill to kill though.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • While I, too, think that cheating is a selfish thing and don't think it's something to be admired, I do admire the honesty in this take.

    Many people enjoy the "taboo" feeling of doing something they shouldn't be doing. An individual admitting the appeal of a *thought*, does not mean that such a thought would (or should) translate into *actions*.

    Going against the grain and admitting to feeling some sort of appeal in your mind about a socially unacceptable topic isn't a negative thing and I don't think a person should be bashed or shamed for that. If the person took actions, however, and hurt another person.. then bashing/shaming would be much more understandable and justified.

  • "what i admire about cheaters"Wtf. Have you ever been cheated on? I hope not coz if that happens then I don't think you will admire him after cheating on you.
    what courage does cheating get? Absolutely non. Thats a cowards act. If you ain't strong enough to tell your partner that you don't want to continue anymore then you have no guts (or heart in this case).

    A few days ago I saw a question of a daughter who slept with her MOTHERS BOYFRIEND... for 4 freaking years. She's strong for sure *sarcasm*

  • I hate it when people try to sugarcoat these things. Cheating can never be good, it destroys people, stop advertising to something that hurts people.

  • I can understand your line of thinking. But I can't say I agree with it and it is definitely flawed. One of the core things of being a human being is empathy. People who cheat do it for a reason. Usually to get something they aren't getting at home and they're too scared to confront their partner about it. Though I understand why you'd admire the whole "I don't f*cking care what you think" attitude you understand that, that attitude and line of thought can quickly lead to developed sociopathy correct? Cheaters are seen as awful people because they cared so little about another human being that they were willing to dismantle their emotional well being for personal gain, not because they were unfaithful.

  • No you don't have to be tough because they hide it, they pretend it didn't happen they lie and try to make it out as if its not their fault or its not that big of a deal so its not them performing the ultimate betrayel, something which should never be admired (seriously might as well say you admire rapist or child killers because these are the most taboo things in our society far more then a cheating) its selfish to the extreme and impulsive. Its despicable and quite honestly disgusting. If people where allowed to react (especially men) the way they would have historically to cheating you wouldn't be saying that. Originally in several cultures a cheating spouse had their nose cut off so that everyone in the world would know what kind of person they truly where. Its the worse thing a human being can do because its the betrayel of the one person your suppose to be loyal to the most. If you cannot be loyal to that one person then you can be loyal to no one. And if you cannot be trusted then you have no place in society you are literally worthless as you have already showed that you will hurt any one with no thought or care about it making you a danger and a liability. Personally I think that's a disgusting view to have. Its the ultimate weakness, its hard to put others first and very easy to do what you whant when you want. Might as well admire those people who get so obese they have to knock down a wall to get them out of their house, after all they clearly don't care what others think and they are doing what they want right? Again, disgusting.

  • so you admire people who do the ultimate even at the expense of others?
    murderers, rapist, pedophiles, terrorists... all are people who do "the ultimate" betraying what it means to be a decent human being

    i'm not comparing cheaters to the aforementioned criminals but i am comparing admiring people who do low character things

    a cheater is not necessarily a bad person but there is nothing to admire about a person who hurts others to satisfy their own selfish desires

    • I wasn't talking about mentally ill psycho people. You're the 3rd guy to mention rapists and pedos...

    • well what's the difference? not the difference in rape vs cheating or murder vs cheating but the antisocial behavior that all those things are why would we admire people for being dishonest? unfeeling? selfish? thoughtless? and hurting others that's the comparison i'm making. do you admire other people who do things to hurt other people? who behave selfishly? why would we limit it to cheaters if is just about appreciating that they did "the ultimate"?

  • Sorry. Cheating on someone is the 2nd worst thing you can do after abuse. Cheaters are pigs and a person should be able to legally beat them within an inch of their life. Once a cheater, always a cheater. nobody is forced to cheat. You basically tell yourself your a lowlife and you never had any respect for your partner.

  • I feel bad for whatever guy ends up with you, smh -_-

    • I've seen bird shit on my car that's more admirable than cheaters.

  • There is nothing I admire about cheaters.

    • Why do you say that?

  • Nothing admirable that I can see...

    If you cheat and you care then you're self destructive, stupid, weak or all three...
    That's not real strength that's weakness.
    The truly strong thing to do is to stay loyal when tested, that takes character and strength. lying and deceiving takes no strength.

    If you cheat and you don't care then you're cold and manipulative...
    That doesn't take any internal strength whatsoever either.
    It's not admirable because it's not something they're overcoming, they just genuinely don't feel empathy, remorse etc... In a way it makes them strong, but I wouldn't envy them because if you can't feel empathy, you can't feel love and that's a pretty huge emotion to miss out on in your life.

  • I'm sorry so many people have attacked you for writing this take. I think I understand what you mean. You aren't condoning cheating, you're just amazed by some people's ability to just not give a fuck about anything or anyone else. Pretty sure many of us have felt the same... but people got all sanctimonious on ya :p

    • Aw thanks! I wish people had read the 'Just a little' part in the beginning. It sounds like you read it but I doubt most did... I figure if they can't read why care what they say at all.

  • short and to the point. bam 😎

  • If you cheat once pray hard that it doesn't become a habit of doing the ultimate 'NO'

  • Cheating is not admirable lmao.

  • So you basically admire sociopathic behaviour. Not saying this to be mean, hey many of us are fascinated by deviant behaviours. For example, the psychology of serial killers interests me and I find it intriguing. But admire it? No way. So I think you took your own fascination a tiny bit too far.

    • DI anyone read the 1st paragraph where I say 'Just a little bit' of admiration? Anyway, I'm not talking about the mentally ill, you're like the 4th person to mention that...

    • Sorry to upset you, that was not my intention. Also, a lot of what we used to call mental illness is considered ok in our time. Sociopaths are all around us, no one thinks that is a problem anymore. Many of them are political leaders, actually. In the case of cheating it is still sociopathic behaviour, even if does not lead to murder. However it does allow one to hurt people knowingly without caring, so yes it is sociopathic.

    • I feel fine lol But sociopaths are cheaters? I think many. many people cheat...

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  • "Like it's not breaking the rules that hurts you but taking them so seriously that does. Because when things finally fail, it's the people who can't handle that trust or just the established rules being broken who are hurt the most. Not the people who get insulted or who do the rule breaking, and that's so interesting to me."

    That's true. Like when a man rapes a woman and people call him scum like he totally doesn't care, but it hurts the girl more because she takes it way too seriously. Or like when a paedophile abuses a child and people say they want them hung they don't care, they don't get hurt, but the kid does. That's like so interesting. Because it's like they're doing things that most sane people find abhorrent, it's like the ultimate NO, and yet they don't care, so they might not be awful people right? That makes complete sense right? Liking people for being cunts and not caring?

    • The people who rape and do pedophilia are mentally ill... Not talking about them ofc.

    • The point is that you're admiring people for being cunts and not caring.

  • Cheating people should be publicly shamed. Like bound to a wall where people throw tomatoes

  • I honestly think cheaters are missing something and if someone revels in it, it would make me even more wary of them as a person. One of my friends cheated on his partner and when I found out I lost all respect for him.

  • Cheating does not take "courage" or "guts".

    It's a coward act of someone who can't tell their partner they need something else or can't realize that relationship is already over.

    There's nothing to admire.

  • Some cheaters cheated some poor villagers by taking away their kidneys. Is this cheating good. If anybody removes your kidney , by cheating , how will you react? Will you like it?

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