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Why Do Guys Fall Asleep After Sex?

It is the sweetest feeling, after a good love making, to slowly fall into dream world.

To me as a man, it is also very romantic to fall into this other plane of life with my loved one next to me. Yet, sometimes I am misunderstood. It is a well known fact that men get sleepy after sex. And this can sometimes annoy their partners. At the very moment a woman is in need of affection, a delicate show of love, a reassurance of togetherness, trust, and safety, the expected provider of all these femininely human needs turns his back and falls asleep.

The woman who was just blissfully pleased, her eyes still closed, trying to remember and relive the moment, her body still in a crazy fluid traffic, reaches her arm to her partner expressing the need for cuddling, is suddenly awakened by a wild snore coming from this human being sleeping with her in the same bed.

It does not matter if they have been together for ten years or thirty years. At that moment of bewilderment the woman may still think that this man is a total stranger. A stranger to woman kind. Someone who does not know anything about feelings. A brute. A wild man.

Gogus olculeri
But it is not the man's fault, rather it is a genetic and biological necessity for man to sleep after sex. After orgasm, both men and women release chemical bodily fluids like oxytocin, gamma amino butyric acid, endorphins, and prolactin. The hormone oxytocin helps the establishment of maternal behavior, stimulation of uterine smooth muscle contraction at birth, and stimulation of milk ejection.

Oxytocin also stimulates the brain so that the body feels a bond and a feeling to be close to his or her partner. Gamma amino butyric acid and endorphins have a calming effect, a relaxed feeling which tickles the brain to signal for a serene sleep.

And here comes the most important verdict, the prolactin. Prolactin is produced in the pituitary gland and it is a stimulant for milk production. Both women and men have certain levels of prolactin in their bodies. However, after orgasm, the body releases a higher dose of prolactin, possibly to relieve sexual arousal and take our mind off sex. The prolactin levels are naturally higher during sleep.

In fact, animals injected with prolactin become quickly tired and immediately go to sleep in a corner of their cages lined up on the wall of a university laboratory. Prolactin seems to be the answer, scientists say. And I believe in science.



Yet, there is one other hypothesis that I have personally developed and would like to share with you. In the beginning there was hunting. Men must go out to hunt to feed the women and the kids waiting in the cave. It was a daily routine for him. He must reproduce, get some sleep, and go out hunting again. If he did not feel the need for some rest, he would not sleep, could not rest and it would be a bad hunting day. In those times, a bad hunting day means starvation.

There also those practical reasons that we cannot deny. Most of the time sex is staged horizontally, lying on a bed, at night, or under dim lights which are all good reasons to fall asleep.

So the desire to fall asleep after sex is in our hormones and our brains - not in our hearts.


What Girls Said 16

  • 2mo

    I feel tired myself after an orgasm.. Despite this, I'm still happy to cuddle and even shag my partner if he wants to have sex.. I masturbate when tired sometimes. I don't know why men can't at least cuddle you as they drift away.

  • 2mo

    This may be true with most men. But my husband never falls a sleep after unless it's when we go lay down for bed. Even then he just gets tired. In my life I've known some men to pass out immediately After.

  • I love it when my man falls asleep afterwards, it shows that he trusts me and that he feels safe. Nothing better.

  • Women had to be up early to you know take care of everything and make sure no one died. i dont think sleep was ever less paramount for woman. lol.

    as far as wanting to show love but needing seep paradox- its simple. you just put your arm around your partner and sleep.

    I don't know about all guys or all women, but im totally exhausted after i cum. im out. very deep peaceful sleep. used to use it to fall asleep asa kid when i was restless. working like a charm for 12 years. ;-)

  • I do it too like after he's gone down on me since he likes to keep going for at least an hour it takes a lot out of me! but he will kiss me on my forehead and hold me until we fall asleep and it's lovely. But like turning your back to them and snoring would be obnoxious. I get the other argument though that it's too hot to cuddle after and you feel suffocated, my boyfriend seems to be immune to this he will be peacefully sleeping pressed up as close to me as he can get and I'm laying there feeling like I'm melting trying to stealthily move the blanket off of me without waking him haha. But I don't mind because I love him, it's not that big of a deal and I do like being close to him.

  • Don't assume ALL women get annoyed with it, I am just as happy to drift of to sleep with the guy. I can lay my head on his chest, he can sleep, I can sleep or think. Personally the whole cuddle buddy thing after sex is kinda annoying. sleep is good.

  • I'm glad I read this, it was very detailed although I had suspected hormones were the reason why anyways.

  • Great article :)

  • Hey girls will too as well. If you & your guy had a major workout or marathons. You 2 will want to just roll over and passout.... with a smile that is :) I personally like to rest myself after all the excitement I am good with a few little kisses and say that I enjoyed it (if I really did that is) then I just take a deep breath of relief and close my eyes or every ounce of energy was used so I may need to get some food and drink to re-fuel.

  • This was a good story:)

  • This was a cute article. And I agree with it

  • Aww that was cute. I didn't understand why they always needed to sleep.. it really annoyed me until now. ;D thankks!

  • It never bothers me that my man falls asleep after sex as long as it never bothers him that I have to go pee directly after sex, which is also a natural bodily function. cute article though, I liked it :3

  • I am a girl and I'm always flat out asleep after one session.

  • Hunting was never the main stasis of food. Women did not wait at the cave. Women did hunt as well as Men. Women also foraged for food to stock during times when animals were scarce. They searched for lifesaving medicine as well. Starvation & sickness would be less controlled without Women gathering & hunting.

  • It's not only men who do that..I often fall asleep after sex or at least take a nap.

What Guys Said 16

  • 2mo

    Prolactin is only released with ejaculation. Ejaculation are two separate processes that occur at the same time. It's actually possible to separate the two and keep going without a refractory period. But the vast majority of men don't know this, which is why most men orgasm once before stopping and going to sleep.

  • GREASE MONKEYS LUBRICATE THE BANANA!!

    • Great take, informative as well as personally interesting.*

  • I always heard it was just the oxytocin.

    Either way, I can put it simpler: Ladies, the reason we fall asleep is mainly because orgasms trigger the release of hormones that are relaxing and hormones that put us to sleep.

    Don't forget that it's the end of a long day at work or the middle of a lazy Sunday when a nap is inevitable.

    And sex can be physically tiring.

  • Very well articulated and full of facts !

    2 thumbs up !

  • If you look at the healing Tao they identify post-coital phenomenon as a loss of chi. Chi is the energy in the body and men will send that energy into their partners which wakes them while drains the men. One way I have found to relieve this symptom is to not ejaculate during intercourse. The energy is built up and then stays with the man. Also, the healing tao suggest that depending on your age you only ejaculate so often as it reduces the life energy abating the body.

  • Haha if I fall asleep after sex with my girlfriend when we decide we're ready (I'm not yet and doubt she is) and she asks why I will use the "alternate hypothesis" XD

  • It is the same reason women fall asleep after sex. The orgasm releases hormones that produce euphoria and sleepiness just as you noted. But this is not unique to men.

  • Yes, good sex stimulates chemicals in the brain that result in causing most men to drift off to sleep

  • Please do, the more women know about this the better for MEN-kind :)

  • Ok i'm so forwarding this to every girl I know

  • Now we just need our girlfriends to read this.

  • I agree with your personal thopughts on this topic as well

  • What else are you going to do talk?

  • I always get SO effing exhausted the moment I finish cumming inside my girlfriend! I can harly maintain consciousness for more than 60 seconds after I've blown my huge come load inside of her pussy. - The worst time was 2 weeks ago where, like I said before, I completely emptied and blasted all of my come in my girl & I must have just flat-out COLLAPSED! My entire body - my 190 pounds of football player body was crushing down on my girlfriend's body (110 lbs) and she couln't wake me up for 5 min.

  • I don't think most women realize how much WORK a guy has to do either. Think trusting like that is easy? Even if a girl is riding she still gets to sit if she wants to.

  • One night I fell asleep on my girl. she got so p*ssed she left and let the dog jump on my bed. later my mum walked in and got scared she said your moving in with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air. I whisted for a cab and when it came near, the license plate said fresh and had dice in the mirror, if anything I could say that this cab was rare, but I thought nah, forget it, yo home to bel-air!

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