Are You Ready For Sex?

[ParkAvenuePrincess]

Losing your virginity is a big deal (no matter what anyone says) and you only get one chance to lose it. These days teenagers are doing it because their "friends are doing it" or because they want to "get rid of it." Both of which are NOT good reasons to start having sex.

Lost my virginity but now I feel like crap?

How do you know you're not ready?

• You don't know the risks (pregnancy, STDs)
• You only want to do it because everyone else is doing it
• You think it'll make your partner happy
• You have high expectations (your first time won't be like a scene from The Notebook)
• Talking about sex makes you uncomfortable (if you can't talk about you won't be able to do it)

How do you know you're ready?

• You know the risks (pregnancy, STDs..)
• You know how to prevent those risks (condoms, birth control)
• You can openly talk to your partner about sex
• You’re comfortable with your partner (emotionally, physically..)

Remember kids, sex is a big deal. Especially when you're about to do it for the first time. Always be safe and never left anyone pressure you into doing it.

[dartmaul15]

can we PLEASE add "you're above the age of concent"?
Just so we're sure we avoid those cocky young teens who believe they're ready simply because they don't know better?

Yes, i know i'll piss off a lot of said people by this, but it's true.

[Frost_Byt3]

And people magically turn mature enough when they turn 18? Maturity doesn't have anything to do with age. There are some people under 18 who are more mature than my friends my age and in my opinion are ready for sex if they wanted to. And there are also dumbasses above the ag of 18 who aren't ready for sex. Your argument is invalid.

[dartmaul15]

@frost_byt3 sorry but maturity have A WHOLE FRIGIN LOT to do with age. IT's all deeply rooted in your brains development, and we al KNOW the brain isn't done developing until into your 20s. Besides, this is also about judgement, and in that area it's even worse than maturity. There's a reason parents have the right to decide over their kids, and that's not because kids are equally able to make smart decissions as their adults.

[Frost_Byt3]

That is generally true, but there are always exceptions. Some people develope and mature faster than others and some people develope and mature slower than others. That's why i don't think age should be the only factor when deciding wether someone is "ready" or not. I started having sex at a young age, i was aware of all of the risks, knew how to handle them, was willing to except the consequences, and infact i was paranoid about pregnancy and STDs. I matured very quickly and i know that some young people are like i was back then. I lost mu virginity at age 15 and (as i did constant research, and played it smart), nothing ever went wrong. Technically adelescents are physically ready for sex between the ages of 10 and 13, and when they are mentally ready depends on the person ENTIRELY, and cannot be determined by their age and age alone. I was physically and mentally ready for sex when i lost my virginity. And i don't regret it at all.

[dartmaul15]

@frost_byt3 true, you might've been an early bloomer. But what about the ones who are (As i described them) too stupid and immature to realize they're not ready? Especially for the girls this can be dangerous! Hence why i beleive the age of concent should be an absolute.

[Frost_Byt3]

Well yes, there are some people who are too immature, but think that they are, but there is really no way to determine wether somebody is ready or not. And it can't be deternined by age either. I think people should have the freedom to decide wether to have sex before the age of consent or not. If people are educated properly, and develope good judgement (like myself) there are no problems. But if they don't have good judgement and maturity, its their own fault, nothing can be done. Unfortunately there is no realistic way to enforce this, its up to peoples judgments, but the poeple who are ready shouldn't have to hold back due to the poor judgement of their peers. And what are we gonna do about the poeple above the age of consent that STILL have poor judgement? Age cut offs won't solve any problems, and no person can he defined by their age.

[dartmaul15]

@frost_byt3 age of concent is also made to protect the individual from those with more power. So twist it as you wish, but the age of concent is there for a reason. And i think it should be respected. Besides, if a kid is mature enough to have sex at such a young age, (s) he should also be mature enough to see the statistics to why it is a REALLY bad idea, and realize it's better to wait. if not, well, is said kid really mature enough? Just wondering...

[Frost_Byt3]

I'm not saying all kids are ready before the age of consent, I'm not even claiming that the majority of them are. I'm that there ARE exceptions, and in my opinion, those who are exceptions to the rule, shouldn't he subject to follow the rule. Just my opinion...

[dartmaul15]

@frost_Byt3 so the exception should be allowed to not follow it? Let me put it in perspective. Speed limits; they're there to protect lives, right? so i am mature and skilled enough to judge my driving properly and thus also go above the speed limit if i deem it safe. So it's prefectly fine of me to be speeding, since i got the skill and maturity to do it safely? Because that's more or less what you're saying. Also, keep in mind one thing. Those who are under average in something tend to overestimate thier abilities (the weaker you are, tha more you overestimate), while those who are good in something tend to underestimate (the better you are, the more you underestimate). Am i the only one seeing your logic combined with the reality i made apparent to be a reciepee for DISASTER?

[Frost_Byt3]

I'll happily admit that that is EXACTLY what I'm saying. And if some problem is supposed to he evident, i don't see it.

[dartmaul15]

@frost_byt3 WHO decides who is above the law? WHO decided you should be free to fuck arround when under the age of concent? WHO decides? The rules need to be absolute, or else everyone will just give themselves exceptions from it as they see fit. "oh, i'm 10 minutes late. Eh, i'm good enough to be speeding". "I know it's illegal to beat the crap out of someone, but i'm smart enough to do it responsibly". See the problem? People will just excuse themselves. And the ones least fit to make those excuses are on the same time the same people who will most likely use it, for personal gain! In short, those not mature enough for sex will determine they are mature enough to make sound decissions, claim they're smart enough to be the exception, then fuck arround. Boom, the moron just got a 15yo bitch pregnant!

[Frost_Byt3]

The ones who are not truly an exception to the rule and mature enough to do what they want will suffer the consequences. Those who are matuer enough, and have good judgement will have no consequences to suffer.

[dartmaul15]

yes... and those mature enough to break the laws are also smart enough to see why we got the fucking law there in the first place!

[Ferretman21]

Typically AROUND the age of 18, a person becomes more mature GENERALLY speaking. It's not done by '' Magic'' it's due to life experience, and a persons brain becoming more developed and capable of making those decisions.

[miserybusiness]

CALLING ALL TEENAGERS

a1.ec-images.myspacecdn.com/.../l.gif

[glamgamergal]

Lmao I'm pretty sure that's from mean girls

[miserybusiness]

dingdingding, we have a winner

[its_that_brown_gir]

I believe in waiting until marriage. But if I were to forget those views, I still would not. I have 7 friends prego right now and only one is still with the biological father. What kind of life will that child have? That's sad. But focusing on the 2 partners, even if the possibility of children were not there, I still would not. I do not desire sex, I do not want it, not do I care to hear about it from others. I feel like "love" is loosely said and people have sex with someone they "love", but after the first big fight, they break up. I think of a body as a rose. Roses are absolutely beautiful. Every time you have sex, in my opinion, a petal falls from your beautiful rose. So by the time you truly find love, Your rose is horrid looking. You have a stem with painful thorns and that's it. I do not judge people who had or are having sex, but I do not agree with them. This is just my opinion. I love everyone and I do not mean to offend anyone whatsoever.

[Solaayy]

This

[QueenofArcticFoxes]

No, I know I am not ready. I am too young, don't know much about STD's and just simply don't want it yet. Even if I had a stable partner, I want my first time to be special not in the back of a car -_-

Oh did you know birth control can have negative consequences? So I would also have to find something better than that!

Too much work.

[MaisGem21]

I lost my virginity at the age of 18 to a friend with benefits.

I do not regret it. I repeat DO NOT regret it.
My story is basically the opposite to the example's experience. My number one worry about losing my virginity (with STD's and pregnancy aside!) was that he would fall off the face of the earth.
I still talk to him to this day, had sex several times. He didn't tell me to change my appearance and made me feel comfortable in my own skin.

I lost it to him for one simple reason; it felt right. I had other opportunities to lose my virginity before him and I can say I would have definitely regretted it. Reasons: Too young, abusive boyfriend, forced himself on me/didn't respect me, drunk and he thought having sex for the first time in a dark alley would be essential. All of them was different guys.
I lost my virginity where there was just me and him, quiet place, no disturbances, comfortable and warm. No pressure and he was gentle and soothing.

[VioletCouple]

I actually like this.

[Scrambled]

If sex and virginity is a big thing, why do women dismiss men who complain that they can't get sex? If its that important, surely there must be a hint of truth to the pain and trauma suffered by men that can't get it, that same trauma and dysfunctional psychology that fuels the sex trade and the multimillion dollar pick-up-community. I say this because I followed advice like yours when I was younger and it actually destroyed me and my sex life. I am still sexually immature and dont meet all your "ready-for-it-tick-points" confidently because advice like this implies that a person has to wait for a perfect moment (which doesn't exist). Your advice is dangerous for men and you creating "nice guy syndrome". Im a repressed grenade now thats going to manipulate and fuck whatever I can because I can, and missed out. That's what your type of advice really creates.

[Alex_lovesmusic]

With all these confusing things going on in society nowadays, I feel it is best to avoid sex altogether. I can't keep up with life, it is frightening. I just sit in my room listening to music in my spare time.

[kheserthorpe]

I didn't try to have sex just to have sex, I waited till I was in a relationship where we both wanted it.

Probably should have tried to have sex sooner, tbh.

[ObscuredBeyond]

Not so fast. Your partner could be a lying con artist. Then, all that confidence is in vain.

See this link for more: dozerfleet.wikia.com/.../What_Condoms_Don't_Protect_You_From

[AleDeEurope]

It doesn't have to be made a big deal, I lost it to a random girl and I don't regret it.

But I do agree with what the pointa you made.

[ParkAvenuePrincess]

Well, for girls (some) it kind of is a big deal

[AleDeEurope]

I don't understand why it should be treated as a big deal, it's not like it's gonna change you as a person.

[ParkAvenuePrincess]

Well, that's debatable

[AleDeEurope]

Did it change you? Why wouldnit change someone?

[NexAngelus]

if u play games ull lol at this. girls are more like BOP ;) guys can more freely change owner. if u dont get the joke just know that girls bond a lot more to their first.

[smexiliciousss]

This is so true! I hope people don't do it just to get it over with

[ParkAvenuePrincess]

I know a few that have

[sammy_31]

Yep definitely am, first time won't be dandy and will be slightly uncomfortable if done slowly and correctly. I'm aware of the risks such as STDs and pregnancy, I want to take care of my body so I'm not going to lose it to some random guy.

[NexAngelus]

if u do it right it won't hurt or will be one of those hurts so much it feels good things. taking care of ur body has nothing to do with NOT having sex. sex is very good for the body. preparing and understanding are the key to ensure it stays healthy. sex is not evil as some people like to try to get across.

[sammy_31]

@NexAngelus True very true

[MrBubbles]

You're not ready unless you're properly MARRIED! X (

[ShaeNielson]

You gotta test it before you buy it. Sex is a great thing, why miss out on it for a long time, just so you can have one time of painful sex, with someone you'd call your husband? That doesn't make sense.

[MrBubbles]

No, you don't. A spouse is not a car. Sex is a beautiful designed for a husband and wife alone. Sex doesn't necessarily have to be painful or awkward at all. If two people (man and woman) love each other very much and genuinely care for one another, they're going to want to make sure that both are comfortable for their first time together. It makes perfect sense because it's what God designed, and God is never wrong.

[ParkAvenuePrincess]

You do you, but I could never wait until marriage

[itsgucci]

I too am waiting for marriage, it's how I was raised, it's what I believe. But may I just point out that calling people out so abruptly is no way to get people to see your side? You can't tell people that this is black and this is white without giving a reasonable explanation and one that people can understand. Also, advice not sought is advice not wanted. The taker made a very informative post about sex that I think everyone (especially girls) should read. Because despite what you believe to be right or wrong, most people don't save sex for marriage. So this is important information for people considering sex. She wasn't asking if you thought it was wrong to have sex out of marriage

[MrBubbles]

I suppose. I'm just very passionate about God and what's right. It's anyone's choice when/with whom they want to have sex. I just wish everyone would listen to God more and follow Hi statutes. :( And we ALL NEED the same advice - namely, to follow and do the will of God. :)

[Xylem]

I have given your downvote bro.

[abundantlyrich]

What about those horny 9-12 yos?

[Dipsy]

If your 9 year old you shouldn't be horny though

[ParkAvenuePrincess]

Ew, no

[glamgamergal]

Lmfao but she's right they get horny too

[abundantlyrich]

Dipsy don't be silly. I personally counselled a father who had grief dealing with his nine yo daughter having sex with teenage boys. (ENGLAND). They also had a support group that had other parents who couldn't stop what their kids were doing at school.

[KBob93]

Good take!

[R3d_Anonymous]

That cover picture turns me on.

[glamgamergal]

😂😂😂^^

[ParkAvenuePrincess]

Oh boy

[Phoenix98]

Sure I've been ready to do it for years but I've been purposely waiting until I get married. And I don't find that changing anytime soon.

[ParkAvenuePrincess]

I respect anyone who can wait in a society like the one we live in.

[Phoenix98]

Thank you and I won't lie it's tough lol.

[Star_Lord]

I'm ready all the time but with who? Chinese girls? I have to say NO NO NO, And No Way.😖Thank you share a such good take😊

[puncakegirl]

Why not Chinese girls?

[Star_Lord]

You want know the turth? If I say here those people who like Chinese girl will bash at me. But I can tell you , In my opinion they not made for me, And thier mind too conservative, Because thier Traditional culture, influence them.

[Star_Lord]

Lol The girl under me is A Chinese girl,

[front2back]

Your take is great, but I think some more details would really enchance it. Or at least links to where you can find out about stuff (like birth control, STD's, etc.)

[ParkAvenuePrincess]

Thanks, I'll remember that for next time

[Diego9O]

Great post.

[Kshppatel]

I'm as ready as I'll ever be but there are certain things stopping me and preventing me from actually going out and pursuing it

[WitchKing]

Cuz teenager want to "get rid of it" or because "their friends are doing it" is not why i lost my virginity at all. Its cuz i was horny as hell and wanted to have sex. So i did when i was 15. So worth it. Been having sex ever since.