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Tips on preparing for first time anal sex?

I've finally decided to give anal sex a try. Today my boyfriend kind of helped me be willing to give it a try after sort of feeling around the area and inserting a finger and kinda fingering me for a bit. I enjoyed it physically, though it did feel a bit weird. I'm not sure if it was still me being mentally not fully comfortable with it or not, but I didn't' want to go all the way with that just yet despite him asking. So I guess 2 questions; 1) As we give things involving anal more time and do them more often, will I get more comfortable with the idea and able to better enjoy the physical aspect of it? 2) How do we prepare for anal in terms of lube, condoms, some stuff about enema/douching?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • 1) It depends on how you see yourself sexually. If you see yourself as more submissive sexually, then I'd suggest you see anal play as the very submissive thing it is and revel in submitting. If you're more dominant in bed, maybe you can see it as being serviced. In any event, try letting go of the taboo nature of it.

    2) An enema isn't usually at all necessary but if you're extremely uptight at the thought of even a tiny bit of fecal material, then a thorough enema 3-4 hours before can be useful. You both might enjoy him giving it to you. Just going to the bathroom good is usually plenty good. Condoms are not necessary. There is a slight chance that he can contract prostatitis, a prostate inflammation easily treated with antibiotics. I personally really, really hate condoms so I never wear them.

    The absolutely most important single aspect of first time anal sex is for you to fully control the initial penetration. There's no hurry so just take whatever time you need. I suggest the spoon position. Use a little Astroglide gel to get slippery. Reach back and place him against your anus and push back with firm, constant pressure. He needs to stay completely still until you tell him to move. Be patient as it may take your sphincter a little time to relax. Breathe deeply, relax, and push back a little like you're using the bathroom. There may be a little "pop" sensation as the head clears your inner sphincter but there should be no overwhelming pain. Continue pushing until he's fully in. Then slide him out and do it again. It'll be much easier this time. Once you're ready, have him start with slow, short strokes. As you get used to it, he can use longer and more forceful strokes. Sometimes playing with your clit can help you relax and enjoy it more. Once you have a little experience, he can just take you but with a slow initial entry.

    • We'd love to hear, here or via message how it's going.

  • Learn to say NO!

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Most Helpful Girls

  • 1) Yes. The more you play around "back there," the more comfortable you will become. It definitely takes time for some people to fully be able to get there physically and mentally to be able to enjoy it. Don't rush things. Start out with simply fingering and then as you get more comfortable, gradually move up to anal toys (such as butt plugs). They come in many different sizes so you can start out small and increase the size over time.

    2) You will definitely need LOTS of lube as the anus is not self-lubricating like the vagina is. The more lube you use, the easier it will be. You also definitely should use condoms, it does not matter what brand or kind. You do not have to use an enema although some people like to. Just make sure you have gone to the bathroom recently and thoroughly washed and cleaned down there and you should be fine.

    • thanks. when you say washed and cleaned, you mean just a quick rinse in the shower and nothing more right?

    • Well yeah. It's a good idea to take a shower before doing this.

  • Ya, use lube, otherwise it's super painful. And I've been doing it for a few years (once in a great while) and I'm still not use to it... I actually would rather just not at all. To be completely honest, and sorry for the gross thought, but it feels like you gotta poop when it's happening.

  • I'm no expert but I guess fingering is a good start. I would recommend using a condom to prevent spreading bacteria and either him or you getting an infection. Make sure to apply lube and that your anus is relaxed and moist or else it will hurt a lot.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 4

  • Ouchhhhhh D:

  • 1- if it's done the right way most likely you will enjoy it and feel more comfortable
    2- he should rub the hole with lube so the muscles will be stretched the the hole will get wider then he can use finger smoothly, then go for it, take your time with rubbing or it will hurt :P , condom is recommended.

  • One word, lube... a lot of it.

  • Always Fast for 90 days before banal sex. That means only drink water for 90 days, no lube. And make sure you put a pencil in your mouth so you can bite it

  • a lot of lube and doggy style let him pound your ass like never before

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