Worst ever sex story!!! An especially bad ending. Can anyone top this?

[Anonymous]

Had some drinks with a girl, took her home. She looked hot but boy had I made the mistake of my life! First I noticed she had a bad case of athletes foot but I'll also never forget the moment I took her underwear off, AGGHHH that smell, it was like I had stuck my head into a bucket of rotting fish guts. Sex was off the menu straight away but she came right onto me even tho she was bone dry. Putting my dick in her dry pussy was absolute agony and it burnt, as if the walls of her vagina were lined with sandpaper. She thought my moans were pleasurable even smiling at me and saying 'does that feel good baby'. I would compare the feeling of inserting my penis to the feeling of trying to squeeze your dick through a keyhole with hot glue around the edges. I just did not enjoy it one bit! I just tried to carry on because I was so embarrassed. Just when I think it can't get any worse she starts making weird animal noises that no human should ever make during sex while staring DIRECTLY into my eyes. I had to look away and avoid eye contact it was that bad. I felt so awkward and actually remember there and then thinking 'I want my ex back'. I faked an orgasm hoping she would stop but she said 'keep going, have another'. I thought 'FUCK' I have to stop but she wouldn't get off. The friction was burning my penis and I was in agony, I didn't know how she could continue. I faked a second orgasm but she had all her weight on me and I could tell she was trying to go all the way so she could have an orgasm of her own. Now, the worst bit. She said she was nearly done so I reluctantly let her go on top to finish. While riding me she bounced up too high and when she came down her bone dry pussy ripped my foreskin. I screamed in agony, pulled it out, dick instantly shrivelled up in agony as it bled. I held a cold compress on it while estimating how many stitches I would need and all she could say was 'oh, I didn't quite finish' before tucking herself into MY bed to go to sleep!

[Anonymous]

I don't think I can top that but, this was my second time ever having sex in my life. Anyway so, it's December and it's freezing cold outside and he takes my into a guest room converted into a garage with a tiny day bed. So we get to kissing and it's good but he bites my lip a little and it was incredibly painful. After a little while he starts to go down on me ( this would be my first oral experience) and it didn't feel good or bad, just really weird like a doctor exam or something.

Then when he decided to go from being it was this really painful pressure in my stomach and he was going way too rough but, I faked the orgasms. Then he lost his erection all of the sudden and kept complaining of stomach aches. So, we took a break and when I went to the bathroom I hear violent vomiting noises through the door. I get out the bathroom and witness him vomiting in the kitchen sink.

He apologizes and leaves the room for a while to wash his mouth out. Then wanted to start again I gave him oral and then he asked me to sit on his face so, I did. There was a lot of sucking and biting that was sort of painful and it didn't feel good at all. Then when he fingered me he finally made me climax and then wouldn't stop when I to said I was done and I had to pull his hand away because he didn't listen. Anyway after we were done I was swollen down there and I couldn't close my legs. This is why I don't like receiving oral sex...

[Asker]

That's strange, like WTF! I have licked many a pussy but it should never swell up from tongue action? Mannnn, did you maybe have an allergic reaction to something he ate? You said he puked before he ate you out…..

[Opinion Owner]

He had food poisoning from a restaurant I actually eat a quite frequently but, I mean he was biting me down there with his teeth kind of hard, I didn't know any better and I thought that's how oral sex worked. I don't know why I agreed to it, I guess I really liked him idk.

[Asker]

Huh, WHAT? Oral sex does not involve biting, certainly to the point where your clit or lips swell up!!! I'll admit I'll have the odd 'nibble' at her but it's a good nibble definitely not a painful one. He needs to learn how to do the job properly, that's actually scary. What a complete tool (him not you).

[AnimeDreama]

Dude, that's horrible. Dx I can't imagine that kind of sex o. o Thank God I've never had sex that bad. The worst sex I've ever had was when I was in a mood and could't reach orgasm. I got no pleasure at all that night. I jsut told my fiance enough and went to sleep. I was so moody that I didn't care that she was abut to cry that night because I was mean.

[DasBlaueKonigin]

Bet ya she had an STD. Vaginas only smell bad if they are infected or not cleaned.

Eh I pity you.

[BertMacklinFBI]

ooooh shiiit. DBK is in da HOUSE! :D

[DasBlaueKonigin]

Oh shit I am!! :O Infected vaginas for the win!!

[Asker]

She was a virgin so I doubt it was an STD. She said she'd used a dildo and that was it. I believe that too since her family are deeply religious and she'd never had a bf.

[DasBlaueKonigin]

Hmm then buddy let me tell ya something. She has no fucking clue how to clean her vagina and got it infected. Vaginas can get infected if they are not cleaned properly. You can tell because they will smell VERY bad, and be dry.

[Asker]

Yeah, no shit. Do you not think I know that she didn't wash down there properly? After all I described it as rotting fish guts smell… I had only just turned 18 and she was nearly 20. I would have kicked her straight out I think if she wasn't older than me. She certainly imposed authority over me when it came to the sex like she was in charge.

[DasBlaueKonigin]

Hey. Dirty and infected are two different things. She was both. You mentioned dirty not infected. Well she left a mess...

[Asker]

I'm not disagreeing with you one bit. Your last two comments were the most truthful I've heard all week!

[DasBlaueKonigin]

I would go to a doctor and get my penis checked out if I was you. That chick has some weird shit going on. And your penis could be in danger.

[Asker]

Haha I'm all good, this was nearly 3 years ago now. I've been in 2 more sexual relationships since, I definitely don't have any weird shit going on and I haven't passed on any 'weird shit'. One brutal thing though - after I had sex with that girl, no matter how many times I washed I couldn't get the smell of rotting fish off my dick and it lasted about a week to 10 days. I had to shave my pubes and buy a special spray, thats how bad it was.

[DasBlaueKonigin]

Oh okay lol. When I read about the anal poop thing I nearly vomited. Shitty girl for sure. Ugh. It sounds terrible.

[abundantlyrich]

Sounds like u had sex with an alien-reptilian.

[BertMacklinFBI]

Bahahahahaa I luv you Dassssyyyy!!! XD

[Plato]

I got used by a crazy girl. Went to my usual Friday's karaoke at the bar, this time my co-worker came and she doesn't ever stop bothering me. I told her to stop touching me or hugging me because she's just awkward and I don't like her, but when I got a little bit wasted, she put her hands on my inner groin which is annoying.

Well, I don't know how the hell I ended up getting so horny to do her, but she came to my place and started kissing my neck. After the lame foreplay, I ended up doing all the work, she couldn't do SHIT. I had to lift her up even though she was on top, I had to tell her how to fuck. Worst of all, at the end where I don't even have an orgasm (but she did after 2 minutes), she tells me "I love you" and I'm thinking (why can't her boyfriend just get rid of her for me).

Long story short, she fell in love with me after terrible sex and I quit my job so that she could stop harassing me.

[abundantlyrich]

You didn't find her attractive but you still let her come on to u

[Plato]

I was drunk and when she came on to me for the last time (although I kept telling her to leave me alone) I just said fuck it, bit the bullet and realized I was going to regret it the next morning.

[Asker]

That sounds bad too. I definitely LOL'd at the 'I had to lift her up even though she was on top' bit haha. What's worse with mine is this girl actually lives next door to me right now, our parents sort of hooked us up as they go to the same church. They wanted us to be in a proper relationship that is sex free but I won't even talk or look at this girl now.

[Plato]

Damn man, what the hell did you get yourself into!

[abundantlyrich]

Maybe i should talk to u when you're drunk. *joke*

[Plato]

Maybe you should, but you're paying (and believe me, my tabs tend to be over $150).

[abundantlyrich]

No, we would both have lemonade instead. :P

[Plato]

I squeeze lemons with my bare hands, it's the best way to tease out the juice.

[abundantlyrich]

Okkayyy lemonade foreplay@_@

[Plato]

Agreed. Let's squeeze these balls and whip up a cool beverage!

[Asker]

I would rather pour all that lemon juice over my ripped foreskin than smell that radioactive pussy again for a split second.

[Plato]

No problem, I can get you some fresh concentration with a little help from abundantlyrich.

[sobg71124]

Sorry. I don't believe this story. First of all, you were repulsed (naturally) by her fish-smelling, pussy, then you had to do her in a painful way, even though she was as dry as sandpaper, yet you were able to maintain an erection throughout such a horrible experience, even after drinking heavily beforehand? And the better question is, why would you have sex with someone like that in the first place, especially after seeing those signs. You are no obligated to, you know, just because she wants to. And why was she completely dry if she was supposedly so turned on? Some of these things just don't make sense to me.

[witzelsucht]

After this story I will never again claim there's no bad sex.

[sandyyy_]

How can a vagina rip foreskin? She's not normal

[Asker]

Simple… A bone dry, tight vagina that couldn't accept a pinky finger let alone an erect penis, comes down with weight of 140lbs and forces foreskin back suddenly and too far ripping it.

[sandyyy_]

i didn't think skin could cut skin. you learn something new everyday i guess

[Asker]

No, it didn't cut the skin. It literally rips it off with force from the friction involved. You're either a virgin or you've only slept with circumcised guys because I can tell you don't understand the mechanics of what happens when the vagina pushes down on a foreskin haha.

[sandyyy_]

yeah im a virgin. and i still dont get it, like did her vagina circumcise you or?

[Asker]

Haha no it just ripped it a few centimetres and made it bleed. The sheer force and weight pulling on a piece of elasticated skin is going to hurt and tear it... Right, grab your bottom lip with your thumb and forefinger. Gently pull down on it, your lip is elasticated and flexible moving, it moves downwards when it's pulled gently and stretches a bit. Now imagine 140lbs of weight suddenly yanking down hard on your lip to the point it rips open but doesn't tear off….

[sandyyy_]

ouch! i get it now. lol this is a funny story btw, hit her up so you could have another story to tell :)

[Asker]

Nah, I've deleted her number. I guess I could always follow the radioactive glow emitting from her pussy… Anyway her name is Ellie Sprunk. Or smelly skunk as I like to call her.

[sandyyy_]

Lmaoooo every part of what you said is so mean!

[Factualgirl]

That's one of the downsides of one night stands... a bad way to learn it... ouch! :S

[Asker]

It wasn't a one night stand. When writing on here you're only allowed to use 2000 letters so I couldn't explain it all. Her dad was a pastor at my parents church and they sort of set us up because they both wanted us to be in a non-sexual stable relationship and get married etc. Plus her dad didn't want her dating a black guy because they were all trouble in the area (according to her). She's 3/4 black, I'm white. We were speaking on FB, texting quite a bit she seemed ok and quite nice so we went out for drinks. The rest is history. Aghhh.

[swagswagswag]

... So let me get this straight. You take this girl home... pull her underwear off... it smells like "rotting fish guts" and you stick your dick in without a condom?

Lolololololol, your ripped foreskin should be the least of your worries

[Asker]

She was a virgin and on the pill to control her periods so it was quite safe. I didn't literally just meet her. Actually her father was the pastor at my parents church and she is rather religious too believe it or not. Before I took her home she admitted she was a virgin and had only used a dildo before… plus I had a few drinks and she was ALL over me!

[swagswagswag]

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHH LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AHAHA. She was down to fuck you on the first night, was all over you AND was on birth control and you actually buy the story that she was a virgin? ahhahaha were you born yesterday? Lmao, a virgin but on the pill to control her periods... classic... almost as old as the "my dog ate my homework" excuse

[swagswagswag]

twitter.com/.../493433170122272768 <-- I bet you were one of these 12 guys

[Asker]

Oh well fuck it. If i had the option to go back in time and avoid this monstrosity but also have to amputate my own penis in return then unfortunately I would be reaching for the nearest knife. She was a virgin though that was why it was major tight and hurt. The silly noises she was making and just how unskilled she was made it obvious it was her first time.

[swagswagswag]

i've had sex with virgins before and it was amazing. The good tight, not painful, thats just not normal, but regardless i'm 99.99999% sure she was lying about being a virgin. Probably so you won't suspect her when the test results come in as positive. Like do you seriously believe this girls paying 30$ a month for birth control just to "control her periods"? No shame though, I fell for the virgin lie once as well, after we fucked the first night i wised up & called her bluff and she admitted it was a lie

[Asker]

No I seriously don't believe this girl is paying $30 a month for birth control as you say because we live in the UK, use £ and birth control is free on the NHS…... She was a virgin man, I would bet my left nut. You can just tell right…there's signs and shit. If she's was as crap as she was in bed yet had experience then she's just a degenerate. Then again you would have to be a degenerate to let your pussy deteriorate to that extent. It was like a smelly swamp between her legs, just without the water and a shit ton of algae. Green waffle :P

[BertMacklinFBI]

was she hot at least? :P

[DasBlaueKonigin]

LOL

He said she was but her vagina was infected.

STD Power rangers to the rescue.

search.yahoo.com/search

[Asker]

Nah she wasn't actually that hot. I thought she was hot back then but she was older than me and I sort of looked up to her. Big mistake lol! I would say she was a 7/10 to me back then but now I would classify her a 4 or 5 out of 10. Actually taking into account the state of her baby maker she would be a 2/10.

[BertMacklinFBI]

Wooooow a 2. Daaaamn hahhahaaa xD

[springocelot]

it sounds like she had a yeast infection... you don't get awfully smelly vaginas for no reason

[GingersBurnTogether]

This should be made into a movie.

[Asker]

Good call. An over dramatic Jim Carrey can play my injured self and the actress pretty much picks itself: Lindsay Lohan. Actually Lohan will have to tone things down a bit and wash her gash out before she can portray the girl in my story.

[GingersBurnTogether]

I kinda feel like an arse for laughing so hard at your very sad story, but that's just gold. That made my day.

[abundantlyrich]

Did you end up catching stds from her?

no bad story to share here.

[Asker]

Nah I caught nothing surprisingly. She was a virgin though, or at least she claimed to be. I was worried a few monsters might have been living in her massive forest of a bush though.

[abundantlyrich]

I'd bet she prolly has internal infection

[Asker]

I'd bet she crawled out of some swamp before taking me to bed...

[abundantlyrich]

Or just a bad diet

[Asker]

Or a swamp

[icantwait]

I'm thinking she crawled our of a swamp >_>

[NovemberJoseph]

Damn, and I thought I had it bad when I tried anal for the first time and there was a piece of shit on my dick when I pulled out... I mean I at least had a condom lol

[Asker]

I've actually had this happen too… but I didn't have a condom on. Honest truth. Like there wasn't a lump of shit on it but my dick was brown pretty much. It was the girl straight after the one in my story above, she was a solid 9/10 and still the hottest girl I've been with. Anyway she rid me with it up her ass hole, it felt great and I cummed up there but as soon as I took it out to my horror it looked like my dick was made out of chocolate.

[NovemberJoseph]

LMAO!! At least you came though, I just pulled out and there was a little lump of shit on it

[Panzer103]

I. Am. In. Pain. After. Reading. This. You are a trooper.

[Princessofpersia]

Awwww I'm sorry that sounds like it was awful

[Asker]

Nah it could be worse I guess. An old friend of mine had a drunken one night stand (his first bit of action ever) and as he drunkedly moved his knee he accidentally hit her in the jaw and she bit the head of his penis off. He lost 2 pints of blood and had to have it reattached with like 20 stitches. The tissue died though so he had to have it removed again and because of his deformity he's too scared to try and have sex with a girl. Basically he's still a virgin at 22. That's got to be worse.

[Princessofpersia]

Omg! Whoa no need to share that

[Princessofpersia]

I hope he is alright tho poor guy

[Anonymous]

you were shocked at the smell and you still put it in raw? smart.

[Asker]

Well I had drank about 5 beers and a bit of whisky, wasn't a wise move. Plus she came right onto me literally sitting on my lap and putting it in. I almost didn't have an option. Believe me, I wanted to scream for help the moment the fishy pussy smell burnt off my nose hairs and eyebrows. I would say it was almost borderline rape actually, she must have realised I wasn't comfortable.

[Anonymous]

Couldn't have been that bad if you were still able to maintain an erection.

Just sayin'.

[Anonymous]

Here is a short version. I wanted on girl instead got her sister. Her sister had the clap and broke my virginity.

[Asker]

Have you got her sister's phone number still?

[Opinion Owner]

No this was many many years ago and have no idea what happened to her.

[Asker]

That's a shame. Do you know any other hot girls that don't have stinky trout smelling, radioactive pussies?

[Opinion Owner]

Like 80 yeah I do

[Asker]

Your sisters, mom and cousin's don't count though.

[Opinion Owner]

Mom is dead, sister is a cunt and I fucked em all and most are hot.

[Asker]

Erm, I don't know whether to laugh or cry at that last comment…. you sarcastic cunt haha thats some dark humour there man or you're just fucked up

[Opinion Owner]

Well happily the last statements by me were all true. And you are correct sir. I am fucked up and I frankly enjoy that about myself. Hey if I can make one person laugh... yes even if it's me.

[Asker]

Yes, you did make me laugh a lot but that's because I thought you were being sarcastic ffs. It's disturbing and upsetting if those statements were actually true though. Frankly I don't think they are true though, if they are you need help man. I don't know what more to say. In the words of Bob Marley, peace to you & one love.

[Opinion Owner]

I'm not sure therapy would help turn my sister from a cunt into a lovely gal and not sure if it would bring the dead back but sure. I will seek some personal attention for all of that asap and yes it's all true.

[Asker]

what about the fucking your family members part? You know it's fucked up to have kids with your cousins right...

[Opinion Owner]

You were not keeping up with the conversation very well. In my rebuttal I said "Mom is dead, sister is a cunt and I fucked em all and most are hot". I said this because you doubted my story. Re read what was written in order. I don't fuck family members but thanks.

[Anonymous]

Lmaooo wow

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry but I laughed!

[Asker]

You're sick in the head girl, have some sympathy! It was a very traumatic experience that left me scarred physically and mentally. Not to mention I can never eat fish again :(

[abundantlyrich]

Asked, you should use wipes to clean her pussy out if it grossed u out.

[Asker]

More like a firehose and 5 kilos of ammonia nitrate. That girl was a mess!

[abundantlyrich]

My guess is she smelt like garden fertilizer.

[Asker]

"Oh, by the way your pussy smells a bit too strong of fish. I'm just going to go downstairs to get some wipes so I can clean it up before we do it". You think she'll reply "ok babe, I'll wait here :)"

[Opinion Owner]

I didn't mean to that girl was just so ignorant. I wasn't laughing at you.