Sexual Relationships
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Boyfriend blames me for ejeculating too quick. HELP?

I am trying my best to understand this but can't seem to understand nor accept it. Am I doing something wrong? So I have been for a 9 months. my boyfriend ejeculates (climax) so quick. I feel so sorry for him when he tries to apologize, cause I know he can't really control it, even if we have lasted for many minutes before (that means he can control it?). I have tried almost everything I can do. I have tried cutting down on foreplay (cause even just normal making out gets him very erected), riding him slower (he hates when I do it, cause he ejeculates faster).. etc so much. I really don't know what to do anymore. I have also noticed that he gets very exited. Too exited. He wants everything done fast, and blames my body for making him ejeculate too fast. This also goes for handjobs. We are in our 20s. It is all messy. what should I do?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Actually thats a pretty good compliment for you :P What he's basically is saying is "its your fault for being too hot" because u make him ejaculate too fast with minimal effort.

    He should work on lasting longer in bed. I find that the best way to last more in bed is to tell him to masturbate to his imagination on what will happen in bed a couple of hours before you guys do it.

    So basically 3 - 4 hours before you do it he goes in the bathroom and masturbates. Then by the time you guys get at it he'll still be recovering but at the same time would still be able to have sex and will last longer.

    Also whenever he feels like he's about to climax then get off of him and stop for 12 seconds. This should be enough time to calm his body and then go at it again. You guys can do this for as many times as you want. The more you stop the better and stronger the climax.

    These ways have worked for me and hopefully they'll work for him. But he shouldn't be blaming you.

    Good luck =)

  • He is young and sometimes that happens. Have you tried giving him a handjob first? That might slow him down for sex. Maybe encourage him to jerk off more often which also might slow him down. Have you tried two condoms to lower the sensation?

    Encourage him to slow down that sex is not a rush and about his orgasm. Have him get you off with his tongue first.

    How often do you two have sex? Do you go for round two or three? If so does that slow him down? Anyway try a handjob first and encourage him to jerk off more. What do you think?

Most Helpful Girls

  • Lol honey, he has low self esteem and feels like less of a man when he does that, therefore he's trying to project his insecurities on to you. It's nobody's "fault", that kind of thing just happens sometimes but he needs to not try to blame you for his short comings.

  • I think they actually have stuff for guys that makes them less sensitive so they last longer. My best friend went to a sex store and got some. She had the same problem with her boyfriend.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Wow, Well, I would suggest that he spends some time (a lot of time) pleasuring you first, either with just his tongue, or with a dildo, or a vibrator. After you've had at least one orgasm, or several, then have some sort of sex with him. Like, a handjob, or a blowjob or let him fuck you really fast and hard.

  • He shouldn't be 'blaming' you at all.. he sounds a prick.

  • This guy is so ignorant how is it gonna be your fault?

  • When this happens, why not just continue foreplay until he gets hard again (should take like, 5-15 minutes), and have another go at it? Guarantee he lasts longer the second time around, and it'll give him more time to get used to the feeling.

    Seriously, sounds like you're his first, and he's just not used to the feeling of being inside a woman yet.

  • It's neither your fault nor his. I'd say he must look for a doctor to see what's going on and if it can be fixed.

  • He's just projecting his insecurities onto you... after the first orgasm men can generally last longer.
    Let him ejaculate during foreplay... wait some time maybe during then he can go down on you then just get back to it depending how fast he can be ready again.

  • Blame the minute man lol tell that cowboy to slow down. There's nothing you can do only he can. tell him what you feel and what you want.

  • Get a new man, a real one this time.

  • It's not your fault! it's his mindset of not enjoying the action and focusing on finishing instead. Probably he is too sensitive too. He can train duration by masturbating a lot with a death grip and really focusing on not cumming. Also controlling his breath could help or trying to think of thomething that turns him of.

  • Sounds like P. E. You should try not touching him and see if cums

  • He can blame only themselves. He needs to learn to delay your ejaculation. In addition to can learn how to have multiple orgasms without ejaculation.
    https://www.bookpump.com/upb/pdf-b/1125135b.pdf
    universaldeity.yolasite.com/.../...asmic%20Man.pdf

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