I think my boyfriend raped me?

For the past week i have been with my boyfriend and his family staying in their beach house. Im very close with his family because we have been together for 6 months and we have always gotten along really well. My bf and I have what seems to be the perfect relationship, I'm 17 and he's 19. He's always been really understanding and caring, as he knows I'm a virgin, and only had 1 boyfriend before him. His family left to go to the beach while i was asleep and my boyfriend stayed behind too. He woke me up and said finally we could spend a bit of time together. We went to sit in the like living room and watched some tv and began to make out. I told him i didn't wanna go any further and he said "we'll see" and i said "no we won't haha" He started pulling my pants down and stuff and i said "its not happening" sorta giggling cause it was really awkward. He then continued and had sex with me even though i said stop a few times. I started crying after and he just hugged me and said " i didn't know you were so serious about it" and i fell asleep. I feel used and like a slut. What can i do?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • Agree with the vast majority of comments here, this is rape. Please try and get some help now and tell you parents if you feel able. Things like this don't go away even if you feel like you can brush it under the carpet now. It will continue to affect you if you in some way. I speak from experience. Please get the help you deserve now and don't put it off. In terms of what to do legally, that is entirely your choice but speak to someone and arm yourself with all the information and support you need. So sorry this happened but you will come through it, especially I you get support now. Feel free to PM me if you want to chat or have questions.

  • Giggling "stop" can be confusing when having fun
    especially if you have caved in before using this tactic.
    That said, I'm sure a lawyer could make a case of rape for you with only a few of the jury uncertain = guilty.

    Yes, you were used by a privileged, self-entitled guy
    but there may be a chance to train BOTH of you into using a "safe word" that completely stops even a raging locomotive in its tracks... this will take work, practice & dry runs.

    Once you have this BF under control, next job is to practice a blood curdling STOP that not only would end an assault by stranger (s) but also summon others to your aid.

  • I would have told his family as soon as they came back. Don't sweep this under the rug; you have to tell someone as soon as you can or he may not face any consequences. Definitely break up with him when you get the chance. I'm so sorry this happened to you.

    You said "we're not going any further" and he said "we'll see"... how messed up is that?

Most Helpful Guys

  • I'm so very sorry this happened to you. You were raped. What to do next is a difficult decision. I'd suggest that when you get back home you find a therapist who's experienced in dealing with sexual abuse victims. Spend some time sorting your feelings out and discussing your options with your therapist. I hope you decide to go to the police but depending on where you live, you'll get widely varying receptions and your therapist will know all about that and can help you decide what to do.

    Again, I'm very sorry and hope you can get past this soon.

  • Your boyfriend is an asshole. Tell his parents, break up with him, and tell the police if you feel like you need to. This is a serious action and I hope you realize that it is NOT ok. Also, and I mean this lovingly and seriously, you should go and get some counseling. This is such a tough way to lose your virginity. This guy pisses me off.

    • True thing. @asker make sure to talk to someone about it.

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What Girls & Guys Said

5 14
  • Yes, that sounds like rape. You told him you did not want to do that and he continued without your consent. You should distance yourself from him immediately. If a guy can't respect your wishes, especially regarding sex, that's not someone you should continue to be with. Contact the police.

  • He did not respect you.
    He had sex with you without mutual consent.
    He committed a crime.
    Whether you choose to acknowledge this fact and do something about it is your choice.
    You know exactly what to do...
    confront the issue, tell your parents, call the police.

    Sorry, this happened to you.
    <3

  • you said no and giggling? this is look like you said 'yes'

    there are alotof girls have rape fantasies too.. this is more confused thing than you think for a boy..

    but if you pushed him away during sex.. and cried.. but still he didn't stop.. than i am sorry this is rape..

  • If you said no and he persisted its rape. which is what happened. call the police and brake up with him.

    • Said tomboy...

    • tomboy says yes

  • You have not given enough facts to form a legal conclusion. The sops in your jurisdiction will know what additional facts are needed to make a case.

  • You need to call the police immediately.

  • Yes he raped you should report him to the police and cut his dick off / balls
    any man does that to girl he doesn't love you and I hope you can get some
    closure..

  • Yeah, standard rape.

  • Were you crying after the sex or during?

  • Yes, that is rape and it needs to be reported. Stop means stop and no means no.

  • Girls in south America n Europe r being used, even they like to do so, n change their bf often like clothes, hunt another dude n it continues even after marriage,,, is this fucking life?

    • sikerim lan ne diyon

  • It's rape. Call the police immediately !

  • Probably it could be considered rape, however you won't be able to prove it, unless he actually made use of violence.

    • Not true. The law of evidence is a complicated thing. Please don't quote it unless you know what you're talking about.

    • Maybe you should just shut up, as you probably have no clue whatsoever.

  • You should break up from him

  • If you did not want to have sex it was rape. If you did then it was not.

    Very simple concept. Unless your jurisdiction has a resistance requirement, then you might be f**ked

  • wtf, that's not rape. rape is when its forceful which is clearly not the case here. you know you could have easly stopped him if u really wanted to. did he stopped you from leaving his house, did he tied you, did he threaten you? No.
    even you know that he would have stopped if you would hv tried harder. would you have just said " No don't do it " if someone tried to kill you? wouldn't you hv tried harder?

    this is such bullshit

    • Let's run with that last example you used. If someone was trying to kill her and she said "No don't do it," but they kill her anyway, that would still be murder, right? It wouldn't be excused just because she didn't try harder to defend herself. Bottom line, she said "no" and he did it anyway. That's pretty much the definition of rape. And just to spell it out for you: Dictionary. com definition of rape: unlawful sexual intercourse or any other sexual penetration of the vagina, anus, or mouth of another person, *with or without force*, by a sex organ, other body part, or foreign object, without the consent of the victim.

    • @snowangle what you said is correct but in a relationship we say lot of things which don't really mean. and I don't think I have to tell you that girls say things which they don't mean all the time. that's why we guys say its impossible to understand a women. if you take her NO as a no for the first time, the next thing you know is that she's upset & you don't hve any idea dafaq you did wrong. So all m saying that the might hv thought the same at that time wgen she said No for sex. a way to make sure you mean NO just act like you mean it. and when was the last time you heard to murder case where the victim just said No & didn't do shit about it. if you don't get it even now I don't think I can make it any clear. I rest my case. \/

  • I doubt you said stop. Stop lying

    • Why wouldn't i say stop. It was painful. Im not lying.

    • Because girls have sex and then makeup stuff out of regret.

    • I haven't made anything up.

    • Show All
  • Tell the police.

  • Tell someone I had a similar thing just after I turned 15 it's a horrible feeling and feel like it's out fault it's not please tell someone it's not easy but it gets easier if you tell someone and yes I know it's hard telling someone be strong please❤