Sexual Relationships
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How can I tell my husband he is not the father?

We have been married a little over 1 year and I am 7 months pregnant with my first child. I have been sleeping with my ex boyfriend over the course of a year and he is the father of my unborn son. I have no idea how to tell my husband and as time goes on he will eventually find out mainly because my husband is white and the baby's father is black. My family knows about it and they think I need to tell him but I don't want to break his heart or our marriage. I am freaking out right now. How can I tell my husband? It was a huge mistake!
0 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • What the actual fuck?

    You don't want to break your husband's heart or your marriage? Maybe you should have thought about that before climbing all over your ex's dick this whole time?

    You don't love your husband, and you don't give a shit about your marriage. You never did, or you wouldn't have been cheating on him this entire time. People like you disgust me, and you deserve whatever happens to you.

    I'd tell you to leave your husband now, and save him the pain of being married to you, but you've already proven that you're selfish, and don't care how he feels.

  • Ok, I'm not going to be like pretty much everyone else here and comment that what you've done is bad and it's already over and stuff like that. The best thing you can do is tell him. The worst way to present it is when you have the baby because guys absolutely hate it when they are told stuff right at the last minute when there is no real time to talk about it, that would probably create a scene you don't need. Best thing you can do is tell him as soon as possible and lead off with how you regret what you did but how you couldn't abort because of your outlook.

Most Helpful Girls

  • "Break your marriage"... I'm not judging you, but if you took have consistently been sleeping with your ex there really isn't any marriage left. The least you could do is be honest and tell your husband. I'm not sure if it will work out the way you want it to, but he deserves the truth no matter the outcome.

    • She doesn't care about the truth she only cares about herself and how she will look coming out of it.

  • You might want to tell him before you go into labor. You seem pretty close. It will be a bitch to deal with a divorce and separation with a new born.

  • *Faints* poor little fella. well you need to pray first, and then have a serious talk. And then see where it goes from there. Good luck.

    • Thank you for not judging like everyone else. I am going to tell him this weekend. I will understand if he doesn't want to be married anymore. I screwed up big time

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What Girls & Guys Said

4 16

  • Damn your husband should leave your ass

  • If it were me I would prefer my wife didn't tell me and just quietly smothered me to death in my sleep.

    Seriously, I would rather be dead than be told something like that.

  • ...
    ...

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vt2i0ts-uck

    • Omg read my mind looooooooooooll

    • I just died haha!

  • (This is Tinkerbell) ouch... that's not gonna be fun. You should tell him sooner rather than later. I certainly can't tell you how he will react because I don't know him and I've never been in this situation. But hopefully he will be forgiving. But I'm sure it will be a very hard conversation

  • Your marriage is already ruined, your husband just doesn't know it yet.

  • Are you 100% sure?

    • I'm pretty positive. He was on vacation visiting his family during the time I got pregnant

    • If you have a hard time telling him face to face then you should write him a letter explaining what happened. Do you still want to be with him?

  • didn't you say you were pregnant by your brother in low before? stop messing around you fool lazy black underage prostitute.

    • What? No sorry that is not me. You have me mixed up with someone else here

  • Yeah sure. It was a huge mistake. At what point was it a mistake? It wasn't a mistake while you were having fun with the ex bf was it? It was a mistake after you found out about the baby y. That's wen it was a mistake. You are fucking disgusting. Your husband should dump your ass and kick you out of the house.

    • Everything was a mistake. I will always love my ex boyfriend but had to move on. He left for awhile and we reconnected and it just happened

    • Bullshit. Lol at it just happened. No it didn't just happen. Shit doesn't just happen. There are a sequence of events that take place. A decision leads to those sequence of events. You made that decision.

  • Admit it to him. Don't be surprised if he breaks up with you.

  • I hope he leaves your ass

  • A huge mistake? it's the biggest of all time

  • You fucked up that is on you not on us so stop asking your nasty

    • I can ask anything here and ask for advice just like you can ask girls if they have small breasts c cup and under and what they would do to you for the day. It's gag. I needed advice

    • Why did you do that to him

  • Is your bf is ready to become legitimate father?

    if he s read then tell your husband about it...
    OR

    if you are ready to brought -up ur child alone then can tell aybody..

  • Be straight up and honest, start by telling him that he has a right to know the truth, but be prepared for the consequences.

  • Guess you can still try to flush the illegitimate baby down the toilet. Perhaps you're gonna need to do a little chopping before flushing, but still.

    • Wow you are really fucked up in the head to say that. Yes I made a bad choice but wow you have some problems

  • Solution.

    assets0.ordienetworks.com/.../...on_width_640x.jpg

    • Accidental cheating etc, my daily dose of laughter.

  • But what if it turns out your husband is the father? How can you know for sure before the baby's born?

    • It doesn't matter. She still cheated.

  • Wait until he sees the kid in the flesh. That way he can feel doubly betrayed. You're currently on track for it.

    When the divorce papers come in, be decent. Don't ask for anything of his, no alimony--and since he isn't the father, don't put him on the birth certificate so he doesn't get hit with child support. Put the real father on it.

    • I don't want him to sign the birth certificate. I think I will tell the nurses I just want my name on it

    • And what about the actual father? You aren't going to hold him responsible? And I don't seriously suggest waiting until the day of birth--tell him today. Tell him you have something very hard to tell him and let him know you'll take full responsibility for your actions and that you won't put him on the line for anything. If you think he'll kick you out, arrange alternate housing before talking to him.

    • I've talked to the real father. He is going to help out. He has another child and is a great dad to her so I'm not too worried. I will tell him this weekend

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  • Wow, you should of aborted... you dont want to hurt him or the marriage? it's already over... how you gonna explain once the baby pops out with a fro? You need to get it over now not later... Disgusted

    • I believe abortion is murder. The child didn't ask to be here and it was a choice I made. I love my son. Abortion never came to mind

    • Where were your morals when you were getting railed by the ex behind your husbands back?

    • Well you don't love your husband thats for damn sure or you wouldn't of been a stupid little slut behind his back. Hell you know he can murder you and get away with it right? It's call passion of crime... best tell him before it's to late... and you should pay for the divorce since your ass is the one to ruin the marriage... and don't expect to get anything from him... he could sue you for adultly and get money from you... so you best suck his nuts through this whole thing... I hope you get what you deserve

  • I don't know how you tell him, but you definitely need to tell him BEFORE the baby is born!
    Don't allow him to get attached and pay for a child that isn't his. He has a right to get the hell away fro the situation.

    • by the way, Mistakes happen without preplanning. Fucking a person who is not your partner, is not a mistake, it was a personal choice you later regret. Don't expect him to stick around.

    • I agree and the closer my due date comes the more I am freaking out. I just need to tell him but it's so hard

    • No its not hard. You know what is hard? Playing child support for a kid that isn't yours. That hard. You are so selfish. You only care about yourself.

    • Show All

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