Sexual Relationships
+1 y

How do I hook up and have a one night stand?

So, I am currently single. I am in my mid-forties, but men I've dated recently say I am beautiful, sexy, smart and fun. I am just the messenger here, I am not trying to boast. I have never had lots of men chasing me, getting boyfriends has been a slow process meeting them through friends. I am outgoing and I'm told my personality is naturally flirtatious. So, I think I have what it takes, but I don't for the life of me know how to go out, hook up with a man and have a one night stand. I tried going to a bar by myself once, but it was half empty and didn't get approached by anyone. Should I approach men or let them approach me? I don't want to act like a tramp, and I feel pathetic showing up on my own since it might look like I am after a one night stand, which I am... ugh! I have no one to go with since my small circle of friends are all married couples and they don't want to help me out. Huh... help!
Updates:
+1 y
This is really what I want now. I am not looking for dating or a serious relationship at this time in my life. Later yes, but I just want to experience this even once... or twice.
+1 y
Don't want to go on internet and post my picture for lots of people to see, due to professional reasons. Plus I can be more immediately selective if I do it in person.
0 0

Most Helpful Girls

  • There is nothing wrong with a woman getting a one night stand. If we want equality we have to stop labeling ourselves as sluts for doing something that is in our nature. So, you are not a slut or doing anything bad.

    Seriously, just ask them. A lot of men like women who are honest about what they want. Most would rather know where they stand with you rather than play games all night. I say most because some guys like the hunt.

    Pick a man, ask if he is single, if he says yes ask him for one fuck with no strings attached. Most men always want to fuck but if they say no, don't take it personally. He could have many reasons for not wanting a no strings attached one nighter. Keep asking, you will get one.
    There is nothing wrong with a one night stand and having a little fun. Trust me one night stands are hott and soo much fun.

  • If you dont want to come off trampy do not approach men when your intentions are for a one night stand. Unless you can truly handle your own emotions/feelings the next morning. Personally, it being 2015, I see nothing wrong with it. If you are confident and dont go off the judgments of others, then get yours boo... because that is what is needed to have one night stands. What makes them "trampy" or "pathetic" is when one tells their stories. Private moments should stay private. Men are attracted to confidence and a chase, go out confidently with out it written on your face that you looking for anything other than drinks, and you might just get one. Good luck.

    • Thank-you for being open minded not judging me. Your comment about not telling my story is a good one. I would have treated it like a get to know you first date thing. Instead, sounds like you are suggesting keep the conversation flirtatious and, well, not deep. Just fun. Thanks.

  • Go to a popular bar/club on a Friday or Saturday night. There's always guys there looking to hook up. Wear something nice, let your outgoing and flirtatious personality out, and you won't have any trouble landing a one night stand. Don't look at it as "I'm approaching to see if he's down for sex", just don't be afraid to talk to people, flirt, and have fun. Meet a lot of people, and you'll come across the guys interested. Then you spend time with the one you like, make out a bit, and grab a taxi and hotel room. Done.

    • This all sounds good. the only thing I might have trouble with is the fact that I'm going to be by myself. How do I insert myself into the conversation of a group complete strangers in order to meet people and find the one I will go home with.

Most Helpful Guys

  • That is your problem, if you want a one night stand. You need to be the tramp, and by all means be aggressive and approach a guy that attracts you interest.

    A few play it safe rules for a one night stand, don't go hunting at a place you socialize at with friends.

    Get a hotel or motel room for the night, do not take a guy to your place or go to his. Take a taxi, to the hunting grounds and not your personal or company car.

    Do not use your real name or at the least use your second name, and try not to give your last name.

    Use a condom.

  • Wait a minute... you want only a one night stand? If that is all you want, I'd think it would be easy. There is of course craigslist. There are a million men on there looking for a one night stand. If you want a date, I would suggest an online dating service like match. com

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 4

  • Let them know right up front that you are not looking for a relation ship you just want a friend to hang out with and have some fun with. tell them it may be a one time thing and that you don't want to be pursued. You have the power.

  • obviously u must finnd guys who r into yer age group, and they r seeking hook ups only :)

    • Are you talking about online? I don't want to go online. I want a good old fashioned have a drink at a bar, have a guy approach me and let the magic happen. For a night. Non-online advice from anyone would be great! Thanks for answering though! :)

  • Go to cougar. com or do a site search for women who want to have random sex.

  • u can find on internet

    • have u tried online chatrooms?

  • Go onto Craigslist. or Go to a bar.

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