How to cope with being cheated on?

[Anonymous]

So about a month ago my boyfriend went on a trip and then he came back and everything was fine until I started getting symptoms so I went to the doctor and I had an std. I knew he had cheated. He lied about it but I still broke up with him. He then confessed. We were together for 4 years. I now am very happy to be out of that relationship and I am healthy again after treatment but I still have so much anger towards how selfish he was. I just cannot beleive how immature and inconsiderate he was to have done that to me. I was always an incredibly caring and loving girlfriend who did not deserve any of that. He was very remorseful and he looked utterly devastated which was good to see because at least I know he suffered. How do I get rid of all of this anger and sadness? Others who have been cheated on how did you cope and get over it? Are you in a better relationship now?

[Anonymous]

I actually know exactly what you are going through. My ex did something similar. He was very lucky that I was visiting family so I wasn't in the same state as him when I found out. I was really heartbroken about it at first, but then I got pissed. I erased all of our pictures off social media, off my computer, etc. I unfriended him. I then decided that wasn't good enough. So I gathered all of our tangible photos, the jewelry he had bought me, the clothes he had left at my place, stuffed animals and all that. I sold the jewelry to a pawn shop, gave all the decent clothes to Goodwill, gave the stuffed animal to a local thrift shop that had a lot of kid stuff. Then all I had left was a few shirts and a hoodie and of course the photos. I then decided to invite a few of my girls over and we lit a fire and burned everything. They brought things from their exes too so we made a girls night out of it. After that I found things that let me release that anger in a less psychotic manner. I got a punching bag and hung it up in the basement, I went on runs everyday, and I even went to a shooting range. I would go out on weekends in my best with my girls and just had fun. It took time, but in the end, I felt so much better. Turns out some of the methods I found to release anger are also good for relieving stress to this day. I hope you get through it!

[Asker]

I did very similar things. I flushed the necklace he gave me down the toilet which was a satisfying feeling. I'm just having a hard time not taking it personally. He said he didn't even know the other girls name. Just the fact that he threw away everything he had with me for some no- name girl he didn't even know crushes me. Sometimes I'm angry but right now I just feel very sad.

[Opinion Owner]

That does happen.. I find lots of girls nights and ice cream help with the sadness. My ex did the same thing to me multiple times and it does hurt. Especially the not knowing the name thing. Its so frustrating! But you have to realize that you don't need a guy like that. This isn't your fault at all so don't take it personally. This was just a guy who only thinks with his d*ck... It takes time to heal after something like that. Surround yourself with good friends and family. It may not take the pain away, but it takes your mind off it.

[Opinion Owner]

Thanks for MHO :)

[HyperOrphic]

I've been cheated on before so I understand what you're going through. You did the right thing by leaving the relationship.

All you can honestly do to cope is recognize that it's over and it isn't worth your time. Purge all of the anger by making a list of everything he did that pissed you off and even write a letter about everything including the infidelity about WHY it pissed you off. Once you do, you should feel better enough to think clearly and realize that he isn't worth being upset over. After that, remove all traces of him from your life. And I mean ALL TRACES.

[emerald77]

Only time will make you get over it! Trust me, I would know =]

[Roboto]

Just drop that bag of shit you're carrying. Move on.

And dont assume the next will be like that too. No matter how many times the story repeats itself. Somewhere is the right guy and you gotta have a clear head when you meet him. So always let go and move on. Forgive, forget, walk away. Start fresh.

[JSmith925]

It is devastating. Unfortunately, time is the only cure. Have you considered a support group for divorcées? After four years, you are as good as married.

[Klaatu51]

4 years r a long time.. but i believe it'd b better if u try 2 deal with it :)

[DelAiden]

What a douche!!!

[DaveyBaby107]

You move on. My ex scammed me out of a lot of money. I found out she was just using me cuz I stumble upon another guy she was using. These are the scum of the earth. It's hurts, but just keep moving forward, they aren't worth your time.

[KidanisCortes]

I got cheated on got left by a guy whos wayy better looking than me and I'm not okay yet and not in a relationship this type of thing is never easy on ones self esteem

[Anonymous]

just dance