Am I asexual or just insecure?

[Anonymous]

I could never decide. I've never really had sexual fantasies. I've never looked at a guy and thought sexually of him. I have noticed good looking men, good bodies and such, but I've never has sexual feelings or an urge to have sex with them. So, with my lack of sexual interest in guys, I thought, "I must be a lesbian!" and I accepted that idea. Until I started thinking about actually being a lesbian. I have no sexual OR romantic attraction to girls. Though, I have the potential for romantic attraction for guys. I have a boyfriend who I am really in love with. We have sex at least once a day. Sometimes 3 times or more. Whenever HE hastles me for it. Sex feels good to me, but I'm not sexually attracted to him or any other guy for that matter. I am in love with him, and I more so just enjoy the intimacy of sex. I masturbate often, too. But I have trouble getting horny lol I just do it before I sleep because it helps me sleep. But I was thinking... perhaps I'm just insecure? I don't enjoy sex because I am usually thinking about how I par up to the porn stars he watches. I don't see myself as a sexual person, because even though I have a great body for an average girl being the gym junkie and health nut that I am, I know I will never look like a porn star. I am self consious of my small breasts and broad waist, my tiny butt etc. I don't look like a porn star when I have sex, my body parts don't 'bounce' like that. I think back to before I met my boyfriend, two years ago, and I remember being a fairly sexual person. Still, I wasn't sexually attracted to other guys. I just liked the idea of sex. I hadn't really watched much porn. I used to read it. I'm a pretty jealous girl now, too. But before my boyfriend, my girlfriends and I used to check out other girls and I wouldn't be jealous of big breasts or pretty faces at all. But now when I see prettier girls, I just get really depressed. Is it possible to just become asexual?

[shessoheavy]

I am asexual. I know this because I have never found anyone sexually attractive and have never had a naturally occurring sexual thought. To me your description sounds asexual. It sound to me like you are both asexual and insecure, and insecurities sound to me more like a body image thing which can be related to sexuality but does not have to be. I do not see how insecurities can make you not sexually attracted to people, that just sounds like asexuality to me.

[Tarvold]

If insecurity is ever a possibility, it is always the problem. Always.

[Asker]

That's a very cool saying indeed. Stealing it :p But I agree. I should address my insecurities first and see what happens. I'm just lucky I have a boyfriend who puts up with it!

[Zendrya]

I think you are asexual but at the end of the day only you will know

[Neoishere]

toooooo big...

[Asker]

What's too big?

[Neoishere]

sorry... description... it's like an autobiography!!!

[Asker]

hahahah sorry! You should read my text messages. I'll write an essay to a "hru" and then wonder why people don't answer me until days later lol

[Neoishere]

see, self enlightenment.. rofl... but it's not just you... almost all girls are too expressive and guys won't complete a single thought in their mind!!! but you have a good sense of humor, keep it up... PS: i am so urged to read your question but won't do it coz it against our nature!!!

[Bards]

No not asexual. You are probably just insecure.