My first blowjob? And I totally regret it? Advice please?

Question

I'm actually really innocent, I'm 17 and have kissed 2 guys. And up into last month, that was the farthest I've ever gone. One of those guys, we were at his house and making out when he unzipped my pants and started to well whatever. I protested, obviously it was moving wayyyy too fast for me. 
After days he kept trying, so eventually I nervously agreed to it. Omfg it hurt. That SAME day he starts to go down on me, obviously I protest again, wayyyyy too fast. He starts to beg, like seriously beg. I let him, and I still physically cringe when I think about it. Then he asked for repayment? And I freak obviously, but eventually I do. 
He apologizes later on, saying he wishes he hadn't have done that, and THEN I SAY IT WAS ALRIGHT
i don't know what came over me. I'm not the type of girl to be pressured into things like that? Part of me doesn't even feel like I can say I was pressured? I'm just overwhelmed with regret, I wish I had never done it. I can't even tell my best friend, im so embarrassed. I haven't spoken to anyone about it, I regret it so much. If I think about it, I have to force myself to think of something else. 
I spoke to him for a while afterwards, he goes to my school and we had strong feelings for eachother, but I've lost them after a while.
somebody please just tell me what to do. How do I get over this? I just want to stop regretting it so much. I'm afraid he'll tell our friends. I'm afraid he'll tell anyone. I just need to know how to get past this and why I regret this so much. Thank you..

shelikeshimalot · Accepted Answer

Girl, u live once, and everyone, literally EVERYONE makes mistakes. It is sure u were pressured and you should not feel guilty about it. For first you should let go, it's nothing that bad, he should feel worse as he is the one who pressured and came up w the idea. Don't cry over spilt milk, you can't change your past. If about the boy, then I'd forget him, he's not worth you and your time, because a real man respects woman's opinion. Have no regrets, you will be happy for the rest of your life. He is the douche, not you. And also you should tell/text him smth like "I don't want anybody to know about it." I'd not care about it, and show the boy you're actually mad/tell him you're not alright bc of this. it will make u feel better if you tell him what you actually fell, being pressured on/mad. Life's too short to regret and think about past, tell him all you feel and want and let go.

BellePepper · Accepted Answer

Oh honey that's so hard and I'm so sorry you had a bad experience ((lots of hugs))

The best thing I can think to do is accept that it happened and then think about what made you uncomfortable in those situations and how to not let it happen again.

This is your body and your mind and emotions. You are the only one who gets to decide what happens to them. Draw boundaries for yourself and think about what you'll do if someone presses them. Then you'll be ready for next time.

Try taking time to get to know yourself and it will become easier to stand up for yourself. It will get better ((H))

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

If he has feelings for you, then I believe he is trustworthy enough to have a real talk with. I know know know it may and probably will be incredibly uncomfortable for you to bring it up, but let him know how you feel about what happened and get his word so he won't tell anybody.

As for the guilt you're feeling, it's okay. Sexual behavior is human nature. We were made to do things like that and there are so many other teens out their who have done just the same. As long as you are staying safe, it's normal and it was bound to happen at some point in your teenage life.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I'm so sorry that happened to you, sweetie. :( Unfortunately, there is not much you can do now. I know that's not what you want to hear. But, try to do the things you normally like doing! Hang out with friends, read, cook, etc.

I know it doesn't feel like it, but the pain will eventually go away, I promise!

Phantom-menace1234 · Accepted Answer

I think you are making a big deal out of nothing. You have some guy a BJ, so what? We all do silly things we are young. I don't think you are regretting giving a BJ, you are worried what your friends are going to think of you.

To be honest, no one really cares what you do, everyone has their own problems. People might think bad things about you, but really they don't give a shit about you.

I slept with a prostitute when I was younger, yeah it was a mistake. But I just of it as an experience, and I will never do it again. Just treat it as a experience, and don't do it again, until it someone you really like.

Life is too short regretting about stupid mistakes. this video explains it all.

TwistedLogic · Accepted Answer

Well, he pressured you a lot and you gave in, so he is selfish for doing that. However, you shouldn't feel guilty of ashamed of the experience. It happened and now it is time to move on. It is your right to explore your sexuality, not that way of course, but still you ought to change your view on sex itself. It isn't a bad thing. Don't make a big deal out of it.

Next time someone manipulates you into doing something you are not so sure about, stop them and be clear about it. But, once again, don't let this affect you more than it should. Hopefully the next time you do such acts with someone, the experience will leave you with feelings of lust and eroticism instead of guilt and regret.

Cheer up. : )

Goldie757 · Answer

Try avoid making out with guys who you are not dating and if a guy pressures you get up and leave. If he tells anyone tell them he has a small dick and sounds like donkey when he cums.

Michael-in-SC · Answer

You're 17, but your age shows as 18-24? A bit of advice.

CherryPieBlackCoffee · Answer

I'd talk to him about it and express how you feel. If you feel the need to tell your friends on your own, tell them how you feel.

ShaeNielson · Answer

Just move on, you'll probably give many hand jobs throughout your life, it's not a big deal.

Anonymous · Answer

The only way to cleanse yourself is to gargle with Drain-O you filthy harlot.

Anonymous · Answer

that's a good girl ;)

Anonymous · Answer

wait, so did you have sex with him? that confused me. but anyway. I wouldn't be embarrassed about it, sex is just a natural thing. since you're 17 'm sure kids around you have done way worse probably not even half of them are virgins, so I wouldn't be worried about it.

My first blowjob? And I totally regret it? Advice please?

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