Why are people in such a rush to lose their virginity?

[Mustachekitteh]

[godfatherfan]

My question would be why do so many women try and hold on to it like it is the most precious thing on earth? All while having very unrealistic expectations of their "first time" being in rose peddles with special music in the background and disney animals surrounding them. That never works out that way.
Sex doesn't really get good until you have had it a while and get experience. as long as your careful, get in there and get as much as you can. Why not? it is fine to just make each other feel good. It helps build confidence and relieve stress.
in the beginning parts of any relationship women have all the power when it comes to sex. 100% of women that want sex when they wake up in the morning can have sex by that night if they choose. I am not saying it will be with the guy they really want, but they can find a guy.
men are at the mercy of the woman. It does even out once you get into a relationship however.
It is ridiculous to wait.
...
that being said... I do think 16 should be a minimum age. even then kids are not all kids can truly able to handle it emotionally. but it is vital that all precautions are taken. When my ex wife and I were engaged both of us used protection. I always used condoms, she used either the pill or the sponge (when they made them). We were engaged 5 years before we finally were able to get married. once we got to the point where we would have been ok with a pregnancy, we only used 1. but when she did get pregnant, it was while she was on the pill. so it happens.

[YourFutureEx]

Actually, no. It's a matter of perception and you are misconstruing. People are not in hurry of losing virginity, people are in hurry of having sex.

Now, you'll say that they are the same thing but no. There's vast difference between the desire of losing the virginity and the desire of having sex (first time, second time or nth time). Virgin and non-virgin are just vague credentials and you can't even define how a specific person can lose virginity. By having sex? Masturbation. By having sex with another person? Blowjob. Still no? Confusing right. If that's what you're talking about then, it is just because we are humans. We live in a society and desire to have several accomplishments in our past and for our better survival, we need to achieve. It is nothing but peer pressure of the society and a trend or better say pseudo competition to keep-up with the other people.

They are heavily influenced by overly sexualized advertisements, magazines, pop culture, company, aristocracy and college life etc.

But that's not why people do sex. To just show people that they had sex. Is that it? No. We do sex because we WANT sex. We have our own sexual drives, desires and curiosity. THAT'S why people lose their virginity so early AKA start having sex at teenage because it is a feeling, an experience, unworldly sensation. You know right? The moment our sexual organs get developed and we start crushing on people, why won't we want to have sex with them as soon as we can?

[YourFutureEx]

YAY! Thanks! \(^-^)/

[ConfusedGrocer]

I'm surprised how many people buy this. I mean, who thinks they're a loser for not having sex? Why can't people see the big picture? Sex isn't necessary or important to survive.

I mean, the way I see it, it's something you do if you get the chance with someone you want to do it with, not something you start chasing around at a certain age. It's not bad if you do it a lot, it's not bad if you don't do it at all. It's your life. Why in the world would anyone call a person a "loser" for that?

[ConfusedGrocer]

Thanks for the MHO!

[XRabbitHeartX]

I think it's a mix of pressure and curiosity. Some people think they'll be shamed if they don't lose it by a certain age or that it makes them a loser. I obviously disagree with that. I'm glad I waited till the right time as I can look back now with no regrets.

[cinderelli]

well because now many people want someone who is ''experienced'' .. i really don't get them tho.. it is not that big a deal to have sex with a virgin..

[Bandit74]

when you say people want someone who is experienced, are you referring to girls or guys? or both?

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 well i deal with guys.. lol.. but i think girls do that too.. so it is for both..

[Bandit74]

I never really got the logic. Like people often equate having a lot of partners to them being better in bed. I see no reason why a person with 2 partners couldn't be just as good as someone who has had 15. As far as virgins, even the wildest most promiscuous people had to start somewhere, so why not give an inexperienced person a chance. All their lessons can be learned with you and you could get the satisfaction of watching your student progress lol

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 EXACTLY!!! why does a girl or guy need to fuck others before you.. i mean if someone is a virgin.. it doesn't mean he or she will be bad in bed.. who knows they can be the wildest one for them.. lol..

[Bandit74]

Yeah also since they've been waiting longer they probably have more sexual frustration that they need to unleash. It's like the person who never drank in high school and then goes crazy in college. I think with guys they are just lazy and dont want to teach her and assume the virgin will make them wait longer. With girls, it's probably that they generally prefer to be more submissive and are turned off by inexperienced guys because of the assumption that they won't be as dominant.

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 well it is bad tho.. i would have no problem with a virgin guy.. we can gain experience together... :)

[Bandit74]

do you have a preference tho?

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 not really.. i am okay with both..

[Bandit74]

are there any histories that would turn you off? like if he had no been with 15 people, would that be a turn off or would you feel indifferent?

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 it would be a turn off he was really into one night stands and sleeping around.

[Bandit74]

Hmm ok what would be more of a turn off a guy who has only been with 3 people but they were both one night stands or a guy who has been with 15 people but they were all relationships?

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 15.. for sure..

[Bandit74]

even though they were all relationships

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 that shows he is not capable of having a long relationship..

[Bandit74]

what about 8?

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 LOL.. what are you trying to ask... so many questions XD

[Bandit74]

Well 1 I'm kinda bored and 2 I'm just interested yo see what your tolerance is. Everyone seems to have different tolerances and its interesting to me. Especially when comparing male to female. I feel like when a girl is turned off its often for slightly different reasons than when a guy is turned off.

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 alright then tell me about guy's tolerance..

[Bandit74]

can I message you so the asker doesn't get a lot of notifications?

[cinderelli]

@Bandit74 umm.. I don't like the pm thing..

[existing_not_living]

I have no idea. It's not that big a deal. I don't see why people are making it out to be one.

[JohnScofield787]

The don't understand what sex is about. It is that simple.

OH yes... and we live in a world where people are dumb enough to believe that what they do is everyone else's business. I really, really, REALLY don't care what you do in the bedroom. Get over yourself... (Not speaking of YOU per se, just saying."

[MeltedCheese89]

Because a lot of them, guys especially, are brought up to believe that the "normal" thing to do is to get laid around the age of 16-17 and that that needs to happen by college at the latest, and if it doesn't, you'll be a loser for the rest of your life and you'll die poor and lonely.

This is the message young people get, again, mostly guys, from their friends, from the movies and TV shows and magazines and advertisements and other media they consume, and from a variety of other sources.

It's a combination of peer pressure and cultural messages that convince people they've GOT to have sex at a young age, which is pretty sad.

[Red_Arrow]

It seems a similar pressure is laid on girls. they are not told that they have to have it before college, but they often get told that there is something strange that they have not yet had it during high school. Very similar message, but not put the same way. Peer pressure on both parts.

[oldsoul82]

@Red_Arrow But a young male whos a virgin after 18 and female who is after 18 get viewed very differently by their same sex peers...

[Red_Arrow]

@oldsoul82 - Differently, yet similarly. Many women get "the look" from their peers and often teased about being a virgin. so it is not "very" differently.

[oldsoul82]

@Red_Arrow True... as a kid I seen that happen in a movie "Ridgemont High" or some shit like that. But while similar, still not in the same depth. Women will be a little bit more sensitive to another woman who is still a virgin. Men will generally either not say much of it or flat out make fun of that guy...

[Red_Arrow]

@oldsoul82 - I, and many other like myself, will not look down on a virgin male. I made a choice and remained a virgin till I was in college, and then was not as active sexually as most guys my age. I ended up marrying and extremely beautiful and intelligent woman, and had a great family. Far, far from ending up poor and lonely. Have no idea what channel you are watching your fairy tales on.

[oldsoul82]

@Red_Arrow I didn't make any declarations. Whatever I've said can easily be proven but I wasn't saying it as the template for everyone in life. You are a special case. Your also CLEARLY not of this generation if your age is correct and that plays a HUGE factor believe it or not. I lost mine at 13 which is very young and I discourage anyone to do so that age; I know I shouldve waited but I dont regret it. I have an 8-year old son that lives with me and I am very well off as a lawyer.

[elew4too]

Sex is like gravity and money: the more you have, the more you get.

[brocha]

Agreed. It's more special with someone special. And also not everyone is lucky to meet people who are attractive and nice who they might want to be intimate with at a young age. I think it's fine to wait as long as you need to even into your thirties to meet someone hot and nice. Not saying it has to be the one, but there are so many reasons why you might not meet someone to lose that first time to.

Wait, it's worth it.

I think it's a great question! Could you help me on mine pls. It's about a female friend who is being suggestive. I don't really want to lose my virginity to her. It's on my profile page if you could help would appreciate it!

[JuicyBrain]

Sex is fun. What's so bad about wanting to have sex?

[Mustachekitteh]

I just mean when some people get to the point of being desperate to lose it.

[JuicyBrain]

Because it starts working against you after a while. Why has a 30yo guy never had sex. Is something wrong with him? Same for a girl...

[JuicyBrain]

I also don't get those who worship virginity. What's so great about it?

[AleDeEurope]

Because we live in a sexual society, where sex is seen as the best someone can do. Just look at shows and movies, well, and even music.
When you grow up watching and listening to that, you want to know what exactly that is about.

[JustinCaseUDontKnow]

I agree with you i don't know why... i never had sex with girl / woman cause it was
by my choice ,

[Ben89]

I never understood it. I was 19 when I finally did and that was with my partner of 11 months of whom I loved. I think men simply want sex and women (not all) feel pressured by society to lose it

[allahu_snackbar]

Virginity is a terrible disease!

[Spencer10]

Our society has become highly sexualized. The pressure to partake in sex is significant. It is difficult to fight and wait for the moment you are comfortable with not the time society tells you you should.

[Bandit74]

They are horny and impulsive

[Oxi112094]

Society and the media portray virginity as something young people get rid of in order to gain experience.

[ClariceOwen23]

It's mostly peer pressure. Virgins-shaming happens just as much as slut-shaming.

[HighlanderTheOne]

Because society says so.

[BlackMac97]

Cause you're considered a loser/bum if you're a virgin in today's society.

[Bards]

They feel pressured

[AmeerX]

No excuse to lose it. I think a strong willed person would resist the temptation when the time come.

[Bards]

@AmeerX yeah. Humans are weak creatures😢

[AmeerX]

I think some a very strong. They will not even consider it. I myself am Virgin but since I am from a culture that looks at sex before marriage as sinful so I think I don't count but there are people who live in western society but don't indulge in it.

[Bards]

@AmeerX thats true. I haven't bothered because I want something meaningful. I could extremely easily sleep with just about anyone I wanted but I would regret it. a lot. Sometimes its annoying but its better to wait.

[AmeerX]

So, you are a Virgin? I salute you. You are the first U. S who said he is virgin

[Bards]

@AmeerX LOL I'm a girl But there are a lot if virgins around

[AmeerX]

Pardon? What do you mean?

[Bards]

I am a "she" And many people are virgins @AmeerX

[AmeerX]

Oh, okay, my mistake. And no I haven't any western people here who are virgin and they are 26 or so. They all have slept at some point with a person just to blend on here.

[Pink2000]

I don't know but I'm trying to hang on to mine for as long as I can.

[Spotme]

So that they don't get sacrificed.

[tyrantfuryre]

It's probably the media's fault.

[JSmuve]

Because everyone wants to be desired and accepted by the opposite sex. And sex is viewed as the ultimate form of acceptance. It's all about validation and fitting in. People have it in their minds that if you haven't done it by a certain age then something is wrong with you.