Is this sexual assault? Should I tell him?

[Anonymous]

I was at a party at my friends a few weeks ago and there was some underage drinking and I ended up really drunk so I went to go lay down on one of the beds in the room. I fell asleep and I remember waking up and this guy was on top of me kissing me hard and grabbing me. He kept trying to pull my pants down but I kept pulling them up and told him to stop and get off but he kept going he put his hand down my pants and under my shirt. I was really dizzy I could barely move and he was biting me, then I don't really remember, someone said they came into the room and kicked him out. I just feel so embarrassed and violated now. Now every time my boyfriend tries to be sexual with me I get so anxious and nervous but I don't tell him, and I start thinking about this. Do you think I should tell him about this? How would I even bring it up I don't want him to judge me or anything. Even if I did tell him I don't know how I'd say it should I tell him every detail of what this guy did? I just feel very uncomfortable now because of what happened and I don't know what to do.

[Lovelinefan]

Sexual assault 100%. Talk to your boyfriend about it, he'll probably be upset but more at the asshole who tried to rape you than at you. It's certainly not your fault (well, getting drunk to the point where you're passing out probably wasn't the smartest thing to do in that situation, but we've all been there, and it's not your fault that someone tried taking advantage of you... but keep that in mind for future parties where there's booze)

Consider going to a therapist to talk about this too, it sounds like it's had a pretty big impact on you and probably won't get better on it's own. For the sake of your own sanity and sexual enjoyment, and the sanity and sexual enjoyment of your boyfriend or any future partners, take care of this problem NOW rather than letting it fester. It's not your fault. No need to feel guilty. Be an adult and seek treatment and get your boyfriends support. I'm sure that since he cares for you he will do what he can to help you deal with this unfortunate situation.
Sorry you had to go through that, good luck to you!

[madhatters4]

i think you should definitely tell someone about it. maybe your parents first, so they can help with how to deal with it

it definitely sounds like sexual assault

[SarahsSummer]

You need to find out who was on you at that party and report him. You might also think about discussing it with a counselor or therapist. If your boyfriend noticed you not being into him then explain, before you met him someone tried to attach you when you were drunk at a party. Do you think he would be judgmental of you passed out or anything.

[reptocarl]

Yes you should tell him. Tell him you need to talk to him and do it face to face and just lay it all out there. I'd be a little miffed that you got so drunk but I'd get over that. I'd be homicidal though at the guy

[logesh]

Yes it is a sexual assualate & rape on the druken stage. If you till him he will have break up with you.

[Skydas]

It is sexual assault and do tell him. If he really wants a relationship he will understand if not you know your answer..