Girls, would you stop dating a guy if you found his fleshlight?

[Anonymous]

A Fleshlight is a thing we men use to masterbate with. Its basically a fake pussy. If you've been dating this guy for about a few weeks and while visiting his house and looking around his room, you found his fleshlight. Would you be creeped out? Would you stop dating him?

[udolipixie]

Girls, would you stop dating a guy if you found his fleshlight?
A. I would stop dating him

To any potential commenters that may claim double standard since gals can use dildo/vibratory and not get judged but guys can't use a toy for them'... yes yes it is a double standard just like guys can be promiscuous and not get judged as a slut/whore/skank/cumdumpster/lacking respect for himself but gals can't and instead are seen as damaged/used up goods. I don't see much male outrage at the slut/stud double standard if anything I see defense ie master key/sh*tty lock and pseudo biology rationalization. So yeah I'll stick to a societal double standard considering I don't see much outrage for other double standards when males are at the advantage.

[JRICHARDS1996]

Hey, as a male virgin I've actually always been somewhat sympathetic to slutty women since I know they face a similar social stigma and double standard. In either case, I don't use a Flashlight because it would make me feel like a loser. I'm already a virgin struggling with some insecurity issues as a result. Do I really want to add to it by using a sex toy? I just can't. It is the same reason I try to avoid porn.

[Asker]

You know. Straight men aren't trying to marry other men. So we don't care if he fucks around. We are trying to find miss right so we do care if a women sleeps around. Not to mention that women are the ones who create the double standard. No man calls another man a player or high fives him except other man whores or douche bags. So get out of here with that shit. Women want to sleep around? Sure go ahead. But don't go getting offended when other men don't want to date you because of it.

[udolipixie]

@JRICHARDS1996 It seems suited to resolve why you would feel like a loser for using a fleshlight or viewing porn. In my view it's simply a masturbatory aid and masturbating and aiding such is not being a loser. It seems really suited to work on the insecurity issues ala not tying your self-esteem/self-worth to your sexual prowess.

[udolipixie]

"Straight men aren't trying to marry other men. So we don't care if he fucks around. " I'm unsure of the point of this statement unless it's some bs hamster wheeling to defend the slut/stud double standard. Nowhere did I state hetero guys are trying to marry other guys or should care if other guys sleep around. I did state there is a slut/stud double standard I find most males defend so I see no reason for me on the behalf of males not to engage in the dildo-vibrator/fleshlight double standard. "Not to mention that women are the ones who create the double standard. " This is your opinion as I highly doubt you have credible factual evidence to support this claim. Considering how it seems most males vehemently defend this double standard I highly doubt gals bear the responsibility for creating it. Especially considering this double standard seems to be present in historical times where gals had no to little control ie female sexuality shamed and female purity reigned.

[udolipixie]

"Women want to sleep around? Sure go ahead. But don't go getting offended when other men don't want to date you because of it. " Egh I'm not offended. If anything I thought the reasonable conclusion would be I support male double standards in this as it means I can engage in double standards against males... and if guys take offense I can easily hand them their own double standards to shut them up. It seems you missed that in your seemingly defend/rationalizing of the slut/stud double standard all while laying all the responsibility for it on gals (despite your acknowledgement that there are men that encourage the stud perception... o. O). Unsure what seemingly upset you so much. I'm not trying to state you can't care if a gal sleeps around... so I'm unsure why you bring up why you think guys care about it. I'm not trying to state who created the double standard... so I'm unsure why you without any support claimed gals did.

[JRICHARDS1996]

I agree. But it is just so difficult because in our society today a man's value seems to be so tied to his sexual prowess. What dieting and being thin is like to girls, so sexual prowess is to men. I feel alienation and estrangement because I'm choosing to stay a virgin.

[Asker]

Did you forget the part where I said that only women call man whores studs, players, ect? Not other men. So there can only be a double standard if most men support man whores. Which we don't. Most men see man whores as douche bags. And the point of "Straight men aren't trying to marry other men" is, the reason women don't hear men shaming man whores, is because we don't care. Because we're not trying to date them. And there is no double standard until women decide they want one. Only women call men studs, players and all that. Other men don't call the man whores that. We don't praise them and we don't support their sleeping around. Women think men say its okay for men to sleep around when in reality, most men don't believe that.

[udolipixie]

"Did you forget the part where I said that only women call man whores studs, players, ect? " No I did not as I addressed that part as being your opinion considering you don't have any factual credible evidence for such. I highly doubt you could gather any factual evidence considering there are plenty of males that call promiscuous males players and studs ala guys who post about the master key/sh*tty lock scenario. Earlier you even acknowledged there are men who encourage this behavior. This is not an only women thing. "Not other men. So there can only be a double standard if most men support man whores. Which we don't. Most men see man whores as douche bags." Again unless you have credible factual evidence it's your opinion that most men do not support promiscuous males. You do not speak for most men. You only speak for yourself and perhaps the men you know.

[udolipixie]

"And there is no double standard until women decide they want one. Only women call men studs, players and all that." No it is not only women that call men studs, players, and all that. There are many males that tout and defend this double standard and call promiscuous males studs and players. I find it quite telling how you are making extremist reality-bending claims to evade any male accountability and responsibility for this double standard... even when nowhere am I holding males responsible for the double standard. Why are you so set on blaming gals for this when nowhere was blame even mentioned? o. O "Other men don't call the man whores that." Yes they do. You may not call promiscuous males that but there are other men who do. Again you do not speak for all/most males. You speak for only you. "We don't praise them and we don't support their sleeping around." There are plenty of males that praise and support males sleeping around hence the master key/sh*tty lock analogy.

[udolipixie]

" Women think men say its okay for men to sleep around when in reality, most men don't believe that. " It's your opinion most men don't believe that. Whether it's reality is a tossup. Unless again you have credible factual evidence that speaks to what most males believe and that *only* women call promiscuous males studs/players. Which I highly doubt you do as you don't know what most males believe and your extremist claim that only gals call promiscuous males studs/players is easily shown false ala master key/sh*tty lock male postings.

[udolipixie]

@JRICHARDS1996 It may be easier for you if you didn't let society influence your perception of how a man is measured. Alienation and estrangement may not necessarily be a negative thing if you regard it as a choice that you made because you are willing to decide for yourself in a way that goes against the grain what it means to be a man.

[Asker]

Holy hell I'm done talking to you. I've argued with people like you many times before. Your head is so far up your own ass the only person you can hear is yourself.

[kaylaS91]

It wouldn't creep me out. I guess a flesh-light is no different than a girl having a dildo/vibrator, and desperate times call for desperate measures sometimes, especially if we'd been dating for just a few weeks.

The only reason it might bug me with my boyfriend would be as to why he would feel the need to use that if he knows I'm DTF 99% of the time, unless in class or studying for a big exam. :P

[xobrowneyedbeauty]

i would find it amusing because i have no sex toys and i've never actually seen a fleshlight except pictures online. i would totally give him a hard time about it. but i wouldn't care haha

[Anonymous]

i think you're going to get a negative reaction... it's more ok for a girl to have a vibrator, in part because we recognize most women could have sex with 20 guys a month easily.

but if a guy goes that far into the self help category, it implies he either lacks the skill or the will to get a woman at all.

[Other_Tommy_Wiseau]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGSLWVSH8EU

filler

[samhradh_leannan]

It would bother me and creep me out a bit, but it wouldn't necessarily be grounds for an instant breakup. (I don't use sex toys so there is nothing hypocritical about my opinion.)

[heywat]

Eh I have a few vibrators I'm not worried

[Miyonis]

Um.

I don't care. It really shouldn't be a big deal. It's just a masturbatory aid.

Haha.

:\

[EmpatheticLady]

It wouldn't bother me.

[Poppykate]

I would just laugh!

[summiter]

What if the girl has toys also? Some mutual fun?

[Sportygal111]

What, girls can use dildo/vibratory and not get judged but guys can't use a toy for them? If some girl broke up with a guy over that she outta be ashamed

[Boomer123]

I would roflma but hey what do I care... he isn't risking getting diseases outside of a relationship

[thewanderingme]

I'd ask if I could use it on him. I like to watch! (:

[Asker]

That early on?

[thewanderingme]

and then he could use my vibrator on me. fun for us both!

[thewanderingme]

oh. I didn't read the details. just the question.

[Asker]

Ah. Alright then. I'm surprised. I thought women would look at the fleshlight like porn. You know, that whole, "What? Am I not enough for him?"

[thewanderingme]

I don't care about porn, as long as what he watches has adults only and isn't degrading or violent. I'd be a hypocrite to say I can still enjoy my vibrator, but he can't enjoy his fleshlight. I'm actually surprised more sexually frustrated men don't get one.

[Asker]

There's a lot of upkeep that goes into one. You have to take it apart, wash it out, dry it, put powder in in, then you have to leave it out in the open for like, ten minutes. very big hassle just for a 5 to 10 minute one shot, you know?

[thewanderingme]

lol. vibrators have to be cleaned too. you don't want bad bacteria breeding i n those things.

[FrenzyP0W3R]

@thewanderingme Because if we are frustrated we can still go on without it? @Asker That's damn a lot of taking care when it just comes to fleshlight and no I didn't knew it takes so much time and stuff to do for about 10 minutes pleasure. lol.

[thewanderingme]

@frenzypow3r I never said you couldn't. it's not like I absolutely need a vibrator, I simply prefer it to manual

[JoannaB]

I don't think I would care if he doesn't use it when i'm available :D

We got dildo so guys can have toys too ^^

[clampfan101]

Sounds gross. :/

[Jessicocoa]

I don't care lol. I don't think it's any different from a chick using a dildo.

[Jared____]

I doubt they'd care at all

[Polocrew]

You mean pocket pussy OP? It's a ritual, fuk em if they don't want it lol

[ManicMadness]

Not unless he gets pissed at my collection of sex toys.

[Anonymous]

She probably has toys for her.

[Anonymous]

I'd probably wanna use it on him

[Anonymous]

It's not much different to my vibrators