Should I tell anyone I used to be the slut at work?

When I was 18 my dad wanted me to get a job. His ex-boss, who became his "friend" said he could use an assistant at his workplace a couple days a week but I kinda knew his intentions since he was seducing me often. He was in his thirties and I was 18 so it was kinda fucked up. Also this guy has had an affair with my mom without my dad ever finding out, so not the best "friend". I didn't want to do it first but my dad kinda ordered me. I wasn't the smartest girl back then, was angry at my dad for making me do this useless job (I literally had nothing to do but bring coffee and papers so the rest didn't have to get up) and since I looked cute, I became the office slut at that place. Partially my fault, I know I let myself get into that situation. My boss was of course fucking me since day one, but I stayed there till i was 21 (easy money while studying) and after a couple weeks, my boss kinda told his colleagues they should try me cause I was easy. So yeah I really got around at that place for 4 years. Now of course I feel ashamed of that whole chapter in my life, and I'm still kinda angry at my dad for pushing me into that. Of course he doesn't know about what happened and he probably doesn't even know about mom's affair with the same guy. But I don't know if I should tell anyone about this ever happening. I have a boyfriend now and he doesn't ask about my passed but I would never dare to tell him. And should I maybe start by having a talk with my dad about his "friend" who screwed his wife and daughter? Would it do any good for him knowing that he kinda pushed his daughter into this? I know my question is vague but all help is welcome.
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Ok, let's look at this as objectively as we can:
    You had sex with multiple people at your last job. There is nothing wrong with having fun, just be aware that a lot of people might judge you for this. You are calling yourself a "slut", so I assume you feel guilty about it. It's the past, you I'm sure had some fun, just move on. Do not dwell on the past.
    Do not feel angry at your father, you chose to sleep with those guys. Yes, he might have told you to take the job, but maybe this was just because he wanted you to have a job for the summer to start learning to be an adult.
    Looks like you're a good bit (at least 7) years older at this point. As I said, it's the past. I would not tell your father at this point about either you or your mom, nothing good will come from it.
    You chose to do what you did, accept responsibility and move on. There is nothing wrong with sex, people have it all the time! Just be safe and any time you are confronted with this type of situation in the future, consider how it will effect you, and the person involved, afterward.

  • your father pushed you to take a job, not to willingly bend over a desk and fuck everyone at the office.
    You weren't the office rape victim, you were the office slut, and that makes a big difference. A slut is someone who is willing. You could have said no... and what, you'd have gotten fired? so what.
    This is your mess, and like most people who fuck up, you're trying to pass the blame, to your father for making you get what he thought was a respectable job. And what good will come from telling your father? He might hate his "friend," but he'll also know his wife betrayed him and his daughter was, at least for a time, a willing whore.

    If you actually feel shame about that, don't tell anyone, try to live a better life, and if you have a daughter one day, raise her to be smarter than you were.

    • This. Working and whoring around are two very different things.

Most Helpful Girls

  • ' since I looked cute, I became the office slut at that place.'
    ... You're 'partially' at fault? Unless someone was physically pushing you onto this guy's dick, as well as the dicks of several others... you're fully to blame. Stop trying to look for others to place the fault on when you're the one who consciously made the decision to sleep with these guys. You say that your dad 'forced you' to sleep with the first one, though you then kind of justify your actions in that respect by saying the ex-boss was seducing you anyway.

    I don't see any reason as to why your past would be relevant in this 'new chapter'. It's your call, though.

  • I swear your sister posted a question like this. That your mom was a cheating fluzy, and that she was fucking the boss and that her sister was falling in her footsteps. This was a few months ago.

    Lol People easily lose respect for people like this. Myself included. This is why I don't want a daughter, I don't want kids, but especially not a daughter.

    Tell your dad that he married a cheating whore and is possibly raising one too.

  • Who does that, why would you even want to tell anyone about that, have you heard about office gossip, it'll make your life a living hell if you do.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 20
  • If this isn't some kind of Troll question, I say just move on. Your past is your past. Unless the guy was raping you, it was consensual.

  • I don't see where that's anyone else's business unless you want to tell them for reasons I don't understand.

    • It's her boyfriend business, poor guy dating an huge slut and don't know it.

    • @Berethor He's dating a woman. If he trusts her and is into her, that's all that matters. In matters of sexual history, don't ask, don't tell.

    • Too bad for him that he don't ask and investigate, he is going to regret it, most likely.

    • Show All
  • Wow. If only you would have had free will.

    You should not tell anyone anything about your sexual history. That's true no matter what kind of a history you have.

    No. It would not do any good. In fact, it would do mostly bad.

    • That is one of the reasons a man have a hard time to trust non-virgin girls those days.

    • @Berethor Their sexual history is irrelevant. The only relevancy from that sexual history is whether or not they have an STD.

    • @Rawrzz that's what sluts and womanizers like to think, the sexual history is very relevant, and obviously that sluttiness runs in the family, like mother, like daughter, never trust a slut.

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  • What would be your goal in having this discussion with your father? Talking just for you to "clear your conscience" may sound like a good thing for you, but it could be a horrible thing for your father. After you have this conversation, your father may feel guilty about forcing you into that job (although he did not force you to become a slut and stay in that position for 3-4 years.) What good is accomplished by sending your dad in a guilt trip?

    Concerning your mom's affair with Romeo, perhaps you should discuss it with your mother first. It may be that your dad is kinky and encouraged it. If not, tell your mom that she should reveal it to your dad. If she does not do so, then MAYBE you should tell your dad. Discuss the situation with someone older, who you trust, before taking any action.

  • This is a situation where I'd really recommend therapy. Tough to say if you should tell your boyfriend and/or your dad. I'd say sort this out with a therapist, and it will also help with your understandable negative feelings regarding this chapter of your life.

  • Didn't read but the answer is NO.

  • 1) "Kinda my fault"? No it was 100% completely your choosing to have sex with everyone.
    2) Why would you ever tell anyone? it is nobody's business and it will only have negative consequences for you.

  • I pity your boyfriend for having a girlfriend like you, you hiding very dark past from him.

  • A couple things...
    First, i would file the whole 4 years away as a learning experience and forget about it... unless it really bothers you then seek counseling.
    Second, I would definitely keep everything from your dad, boyfriend, and anyone else, unless you want to open up a can of worms that will not ever go away.
    If anything, you might say that this 'friend' is not really a good friend to your dad and he should distance himself... stuff you saw at the job.

  • I don't see why you'd tell that to ANYONE ever?

  • That's a REALLY delicate situation... I think the infidelity on your mother's part is important.. But unfortunately and regrettably, I truly don't think there is any ground in blaming your dad for you giving in to your boss' seduction. If you had brought up the affair before you worked there, exposing your boss' sleezey deceitful character, then I guarantee your dad would not have pushed you to work there.. So the omission kind of put the responsibility on you. I feel terrible for saying it, but it's the logical conclusion of the situation.

    You knew he was a douche bag, you knew you would give in to his advances, you were an adult & did not have to listen to your father.. Yet you did it anyways.

    That being said, I think if you start at the beginning, and perhaps talk to your mom.. Tell her that you know about her affair, and that you had continual Ses with him and his coworkers for years, tell her you need to tell your dad... and then talk to only your dad, explain from the beginning about your mom's affair, then your involvement, and I'm sure he will feel terrible about the entire thing...

    • That being said, I would NOT tell your boyfriend unless you have a super stable trusting relationship that you both feel like marriage in an option

  • it depends on the version of help. it might make you feel better about that chapter but it could also destroy your dad and your family completely from it. So it comes down to weather you can live with what happened and be strong enough to learn from it and push forward, or if you wanna risk destroying your family?

  • Ya.. Totally his fault.

  • Not sure why anyone needs to know that. I'd say "no", provided you are trying to put it all behind you.

  • Why would you even think about telling your boyfriend
    And no dont tell your dad
    And stop trying to make it seem like someone elses fault to help with your guilt
    Your dad didn't order you to sleep with all the people at your job... this is all 100% your own failt

  • You awesome. There is nothing wrong with being easy or experienced and in fact a wife that knows her way around a cock is a blessing as well as one who will be able to do more naughty things like you will be able to. Don't tell anyone and be around not ashamed that you brought so many guys a fantacy

  • Don't ask, don't tell.

  • what happened is happened, now you have moved on, so no point of talking about the past, but in the future make sure that, you will do the right thing

  • That is awesome

    • Awesome for the men who was using her for sex maybe, but not for her boyfriend.

  • Are they still friends?

    Did the boss make you or force you to do sexual stuff or how did and why did it start?

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