Should I keep waiting for someone special for my first time or just have sex with some random girl?

Im 21 and I have been waiting for a special girl because I would like it to be special and great and not just having sex but making love but at the same time this is starting to bother me because everyone I know have had sex and I feel weird even when nobody knows, also I would like to know how it feels having a woman and get to know her naked body and touch her. I'm not saying I want to marry my first girl but I do want it to be my girlfriend or someone special but sometimes my body is asking for sex and my head is telling me no. Should I keep waiting? and how long?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • I think it would be best if you were in a relationship with the first girl, and have feelings for her! I have 2 reasons for this:

    1) First sexual encounters can be basically really fucking awful! I'm not saying yours will be - but for some people, when they're actually put on the spot to do it, their mastery of all memorized porn blanks out, and they don't know what to do. This way, if you're in the relationship with you, she'll be patient and supportive of you. You'll even work through any problems you may have, and sex with this person will get better and better. A one night stand might get pissed, and you'll never get to practice, meaning sex will be ruined for you for a while... :S

    2) I don't know, surveys have shown that sex feels better overall if you do it with someone you have feelings for. Things just feel more special. Can't really be described. Feels more... full?

    Don't worry about other people you know having sex before you. People, especially guys, won't tell other people this, but a lot of people have had sexual encounters they wish they hadn't... Yeah, it's a notch on a belt you can boast about, but it's just a gross memory. So don't worry about them - some guys lie about this crap anyways - just look out for yourself!

  • Well done u saving ur virginity for sm1 special... n ya it would hv been tough for u as usually guys doesn't wait as they r curious to know about female body
    I hope u'll save it until u find her as I believe sex should be not done for hving fun... it is more mixing of souls... if u will hv it with ur special girl u'll find it a heavenly experience rather than having it with random girl with whom u don't hv any emotional connections... think about it n try meditation when u r exited I was a biology student n I know this all...

    • N yaa u will always remember ur first time so better make it special for u too

  • One night stand/random sex is only satisfying on a pleasurable level and even then it might not even be pleasurable unless you are into cold, meaningless sex with no romance. If you actually want it to be special then wait. There's nothing that can beat having sex with someone who actually loves you and cherishes you and who you feel love towards too. It's such a bonding experience that no amount of one night stand can give.

Most Helpful Guys

  • Here's what I've experienced man. I was just like you... waiting to have sex with a special girl... but by the time I was 24... I realized that just about every girl who is in my age range already had sex 10 times over. So basically... have sex with that "special girl" would feel special for you, but it won't feel special for them since they've done the deed already.

    keeping that in mind, I decided that it was time to fuck around. I lost my virginity at 24 to a stripper... and then I've had sex a few times after that. To be honest... it felt fucking amazing! Great experience... HOWEVER...

    Hooking up with a random girl only feels good in that moment. After the sex is over, you feel great but then that experience just becomes a memory and then you start to feel empty and crave sex again.

    I actually envy those that are in relationships because they get to have sex every night or however often they want... instead of having to always talk to a new girl and try to find sex.

  • Your first time is probably not going to be great anyway, just awkward and short. I say have sex with some random girl so you feel no pressure and have nothing to lose. You will then be experienced and not as nervous when you do meet a girl you really like.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Its entirely up to you. You are the only one that can make the hat decision. I'm 24 and I've never had sex, because I want my first time to be special and with a guy a actually have strong feelings for. I also get sexuall frustration, but I fight the urge to have one night stands as I know its not what I want. I've had plenty of offers but I refused them.

  • If you just want to get it over with then go for it. You will find that the sex will be way better with the right girl at the right time in the right place. Hold out a bit longer!

  • Every decision have it's cost, it's can be hard to wait for the right girl, but if you would lose it to some slut you might regret it, and it's an bad way to start you sex life.

  • wait for the right one

  • I still wonder what gives people the impression it's really going to be anything special, rofl.

  • Wait until you find someone who you connect with and really want your first time to be with. You don't need to stay together forever, but it shouldn't also be someone random, who you'll forget

  • Im waiting. Its tempting though sometimes i think maybe i should itd be easy but then i side against it

  • I would suggest that you wait for the right girl, if she exists.
    Sex without love is hollow.

  • if you have waited this long to find someone special why just give it away in your heart you know it needs to be special or you would have done it by now.
    I know you should follow your heart when you make this decision

  • You should wait, it is worth it. Its not worth losing your virgin to a stranger.

  • I wish I'd pursued casual sex more before entering relationships. Not because I prefer it but because the experience would have been helpful. It also would have helped me have better expectations around sex and not been overly attached from having it when I did.

  • You've already made your decision you want to wait.