If I use dildos, should that count as sex experience? Should I tell him I'm a virgin or lie?

[Anonymous]

I've used dildos to masturbate since highscool and let's just say some that I use now are kinda big😓 I'm not a "tight" virgin.

so I have lots of questions all in one, here goes:

1) would a guy say I'm lying if I told him I'm a virgin? I guess guys expect a virgin to be really tight but I'm not anymore. I am a virgin tho so it wouldn't be a lie at all.

2) would guys think I'm a slut for liking bigger dildos?

3) would many guys be ok we me having toys at all? Or is it something where a guy would want his dick to be the only one I use.

4) last question, and I know it's tmi but that's what anon is for. My biggest one is 9" long, not many guys are that big I don't think so is that intimidating, or would a guy not like me as much and worry that he's not enough?

sorry for long question but I feel so insecure about all this. I don't want anyone to call me slut or run away because of it.

[Anonymous]

Despite your dildo size, I'm sure you're plenty tight. Relax. After you have kids is when you have to worry about getting loose.

Answers to questions:

#1. I don't think you're thigtness is an issue, certainly not one that would cause a guy to think you're lying. I know you think the 9 inc killer might have loosened you up a bit, but it's girth not length that would loosen you up if anything. The vagina is semi elastic. Also you're way young, I'm sure your tight enough to make diamonds out of coal, despite what you may think.

#2. Most guys wouldn't think you are a slut for using bigger dildos. I sure don't. I think most girls are lying when they say size doesn't matter. I think almost all girls are happy with 5-7 inc or more in length and good girth. Obviously that's going to feel better than 3 inc and small girth. A slut is a girl who sleeps around a lot. You haven't slept with anyone... but your self. What might happen though is a guy might feel intimidated by your dildo in the sense of he's smaller in girth and length, he may feel inadequate. That he might not be able to please you. I would not care. I'm pretty well hung. Even if I weren't I still wouldn't care. I'm down for whatever makes you feel good, and me as well. by the way I think it's hot you like the bigger ones. If I were your husband I'd want to see you use it on yourself for certain.

#3. Almost all would be. I not only would be cool with it, as I stated earlier I'd request it. The #1 most common fantasy for guys is to watch a girl masturbate. #2 is Lesbians by the way. Since you already have dildos, that's a plus and I'd know you'd be down to take a trip with me to the local adult store to buy a few more for me to watch you use. Hell, I'd get you a whole arsenal of dildos.

#4. I stated earlier before I read the question about guys possibly being intimidated and why. It wouldn't be that he wouldn't like you, it would be he would be insecure.

Don't be insecure about any of this. I honestly have half a chubby right now just from reading your questions. Relax, enjoy your dildos, and on a side note, dump any guy who has an issue with any of this. If he does he's an insecure douche bag. Happy masturbating.

[Bvroon]

There are a few things you might want to consider. 1. Depending upon how you view and define sex, masturbation might be considered sex (just with yourself) and yes you are still a virgin as you have not had sex with another person. 2. Your vagina is the way it is, and like many things in life is unique to you. Look some guys have really large penises, some don't and then some fall somewhere in between (average), this is also true of vagina size, breast size etc. So I'm sure your vagina size is just fine. 3. Vaginal size and "tightness" do not correlate to sexual pleasure either giving or receiving. Just as I mentioned in the previous point there is a range of sizes for peoples genitals, as such having a large penis or a tight vagina doesn't necessarily mean that the sex will be great, within this subject the size of your dildo shouldn't be an issue unless you make it one, in the sense that unless you whip it out to compare sizes just as he drops his drawers for sex and you declare that "that" simply won't do! (just an example, not saying you would do this) then it shouldn't be an issue. We all have our preferences, however these preferences shouldn't dictate our choices as we interact with other people.

Lastly I know this sounds so cliche' but it is really what you do that influences sexual pleasure and satisfaction, so while it is true you might like your large dildo and he may not be 9 inches, how you caress and touch each other can still mean that you have a very satisfying and magical sexual experience. To help illustrate this point, my wife likes to use a vibrating egg during sex, as it happens I can't replicate the stimulation the egg provides, but by accepting this and helping her by touching her in other ways as she uses it, helps to enhance the overall experience, so she is able to climax one or several times, and I was a part of that so it becomes an overall experience rather than a series of isolated events. At any rate I hope this helps and helps put your mind a little more at ease.

Just try to remember to not stress so much about it when having sex, as sex and stress don't usually go together very well, and the more relaxed and comfortable you are the better it will be. :-)

[Asker]

Thanks🙂

[Bvroon]

Np :-)

[Anonymous]

1) only a dumb , inexperienced guy would accuse you of lying , lots of girls who are virgins but have popped their cherries aren't the "tight" virgins, some girls are even naturally wider down there even if theyve just had sex once.
2) I dont know if they'd think you're a slut , you haven't had sex with anyone and you just happen to like bigger sex toys , a lot of women do. most guys assume this already
3) seems to be a personal thing , a lot of guys dont care if their girlfriend uses toys to pleasure themselves but some guys would prefer if she didn't , it depends on the guy
4) guys may feel a bit intimidated that you're used to that size if they aren't that size themselves, though I don't think something like this is going to make them not like you as much , dont over think this , its Also not necessary to tell the guy the size of your biggest sex toy if not asked, sex is something that shouldn't be worrysome and make you feel nervous about. I dont think this is as much of a big deal to a guy as you may think , as long as you're clean I think a lot of men won't care about these things you've mentioned

[Questioner5813]

There's a lot going on here.

First of all, "virgin" is a personal term. You'd probably be considered a virgin by most people's definitions, but what does it matter? I would just avoid the word "virgin" entirely, since it is loaded. Instead I would just say that you've never had sex with a man before. That way you are clear about all of it.

You don't *have* to tell him about the dildos at all. I probably wouldn't bring it up unless there is a natural opening (no pun intended) in the conversation. And you definitely don't need to tell him about the size of the dildos. That is just weird information to give -- unless you are hoping that he will use the dildos on you. But if your goal is to have intercourse with him (using his penis) then there doesn't need to be talk or showing of dildos at all.

[Zendrya]

you realize that using a dildo doesn't make you less tight right... that isn't how anatomy works. Yes you are still a virgin... don't tell him you aren't when you are, a slut is someone who sleeps around and you don't so no, dependent on the guy, guys always worry they aren't enough so yes he will be very self-conscious if he knew about your 9in dildo.

[Asker]

You sure it won't feel different to a guy? They wouldn't notice a difference?

[Zendrya]

no... the vagina is elastic.. it goes back to its original size

[Asker]

Well yeah it stretches, but still even I notice that my bigger dildo used to feel huge when I first bought it, but now it fits better. Isn't that stretching out?

[Tdieseler]

Technically you are and aren't a virgin. i mean, biologically not, but are still one experience-wise.
Secondly, guys dont mind toys... but when its dick time, its dick time, no toys allowed.
Thirdly you aren't a slut for liking big dildos, you know what you want/like, real guys can respect that.
Lastly, and i know this sounds a little dumb, but why not find someone with 9 inches or close enough lol... get the worry out of the way...
I recommend black, but thats just me :) lol loving this question.

[blazerock44]

what if a girl falls on the ground hard and a bit blood comes out of her vaginal? ... does that mean she lost her virginity and has to tell her husband about it in the future?

[Tdieseler]

@blazerock44 depends on a person's definition of the word virginity.

[blazerock44]

well the real meaning of virginity.. I don't think her hymen was tore... if so. only a bit

[Tdieseler]

@blazerock44 forgetting the biological aspect... she still didn't get a dick a dick in her so she's still a virgin in my book. Until she gets that with some guy slapping her ass while giving her the goods; she's a virgin lol.

[blazerock44]

lol Thanks man.. after all girls have to move and play and stuff.. so a lot of girl have had a torn hymen probably

[Tdieseler]

@blazerock44 when i first heard that was possible, i was surprised lol... sigh... funny how that works huh. and since im traditional, i also heard of third-world country stories where the hymen had been torn and the girl was assumed not to be a virgin... i'd laugh, but in some of those stories, the poor girl was executed, brought "shame" to the family and all... fucking morons. Virginity ain't shit today though, matter of fact, i feel if some idiot wants to hang on to it, that is exactly what he/she is... an idiot. Its all about experience now, since divorce and cheating rates have shot up.

[blazerock44]

yeah true.. it's 2018 almost.. and there's still girls making a huge deal of it... a hymen has a high chance of getting torn... but it won't get all ripped until the baby goes through it or a dick goes in it a few times

[Tdieseler]

@blazerock44 why do you think im using the word "moron". no one cares anymore. I've been with enough virgins to know im gonna burn somewhere :) , and i still get approached by more, but im done. And in my Take, i wrote that those ones that say they are waiting for marriage... those are the biggest morons of all. I almost cried when i read a guy say the same like 2 days ago... like the female morons, i went off on him too for joining the female moronic mentality. Then again, the reason why some of them keep this "virginity", for the males, they can't get none, for the females, no one wants to fuck em, so they hold on to that one thing in the hopes that it makes them seem valuable or desirable... Morons... i have one phrase for either side that will make them desirable instantly lol.

[blazerock44]

jahahahahahah lol but man.. there are religious people so yes

[Tdieseler]

@blazerock44 ... yea..😒.. morons..

[blazerock44]

lol.. I don't think so man... there isn't right and wrong.. its how people think... it's everyone was the same.. the world wouldn't be a beautiful place

[Tdieseler]

@blazerock44 If everyone was the same, it WOULD be a beautiful place. diversity creates controversy and thats why we fight. we aren't of like mind. Not everyone appreciates someone with a different mindset. Look at what is happening in the Middle East.

[blazerock44]

yes that's true.. but we can't do anything lol...

[Tdieseler]

@blazerock44 yea... fuck em.. i hope they eliminate themselves.

[blazerock44]

how come your not affected by society slit shaming females? aren't all females like this and hide there sexual desires and stuff

[coachTanthony]

Why so many anonymous users! Why oh why LOL... the answers you seek differ depending on age.. im sorry but that is just the way it is.. some younger guys may be insecure about a lot of this where older guys are like... bring it on.. lets party. So again... enough with the anonymous ! GAG doesn't charge a sign up fee LOL enough already.. ugh

[Teenwolf18]

your answer did not relate to her question.

[coachTanthony]

@Teenwolf18 I keep getting distracted by the Anonymous users! She should never lie about being a virgin... toys do not count. Toys can't make you a non virgin!

[BertMacklinFBI]

don't be stupid lol

[wankiam]

just be open and honest and if he doesn't like it then you will be sure to find a guy that does.

[abundantlyrich]

9 inches? This sounds like a troll post!

[Bandit74]

1. Yes, but not because of tightness. It's just that most girls are not virgins and its hard to believe any girl is a virgin after HS.

2. Some might, but I don't think what kind of dildo you use has anything to do with whether or not you are a slut.

3. Depends on the guy, but I would be ok with it.

4. Also depends on the guy. Now personally, this is where I would start to be turned off. I am fine with a girl having sex toys, but if she is always using dildos that are 8-9 inches long with like 6inch girth then I would feel like I am inadequate by her standards. I would rather not waste eachother's time and just let her find someone who is closer to her preference.

[VirginiaBeachBum]

You are still a virgin. A dildo doesn't count. :-) And I wouldn't lie about it. If a guy has an issue with you masturbating or using toys, this is something you really want to know about before a relationship gets too far off the ground. That's indicative of a basic sexual incompatibility.

But to your other questions, if you and I started dating and you told me what you had done with the dildos, my first question to you would be, "Where are they and why aren't we using them?" You have absolutely zero reason to feel any shame about pleasuring yourself. Keep on being you! :-)

[03FreeBird14]

All you can do is be up front with the guy you are dating and don't lie about it, just tell the truth and how you feel about what you are doing and why you do it coz lying gets you no where and once you start you won't be able to stop

[xKirito]

I would prefer a girl kind of like you. One who is a virgin because I'm a virgin but I would never want to hurt her by popping her cherry. And that way you're not so worried about it hurting

[clampfan101]

Masturbation isn't the same as sex. Sex involves a man and woman together.

[Try6Curious9]

Even if virginity were not a social construct, a toy would not "de-virginize" you.

Play however you want with whatever you want.

[Blitzkrieger]

It shouldn't be a problem at all. Its good to know because we always wonder if girls are sexually active or not. Its good to know that they are. The 9 inch dildo shouldn't be a problem either. Guys grip their hand tighter than any vagina can grip during masturbation, so why shouldn't girls masturbate with bigger than average dildos?

[realworld2017]

Dildos don't count as sex at all. Only use glass dildos though. Don't ever use plastic.

[Justin85283]

You're a virgin until you have Dick. Guys don't care if you have toys especially if you tell them that he's the only one because you use toys.../

[Seppelson]

You are still a virgin

[That1guy2]

You're not a slut, you just have a kink. the right guy will accept that. Hell, the right guy would want to help you use them on yourself. Nothing wrong with enjoying sex your own way, as long as no one is hurt.

In my experience, guys won't really care about how tight it is as long as we can put it in you. if a guy questions it, explain your kink. if he runs, he wasn't right for you.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure the guy would ask, but if he did, tell him you are indeed a virgin. But tell him you play with sex toys, if he thinks that counts.

Also, tell him you have a large variety of toys and you'd like it if he'd help you use them.

[Anonymous]

no you shouldn't

[Anonymous]

I'd be more than fine with a girl using dildos. Heck I use em myself. :P

And nah, I know I wouldn't judge you. And it could count as experience, but just know that a dude's little guy isn't as sturdy as that. We can bleed. But don't worry, as long as you're not doing anything completely crazy you're pretty much fine.

As for the size... If I know I can and I do satisfy you, and I continuously do without the help of a dildo, then I am okay. But if I see you preferring the dildo over me, well... I'm gonna feel very insecure about it. My suggestion is to keep it away from them for the time being. If you know you can trust them then go ahead. Otherwise, I wouldn't try it.