Sexual Relationships
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Why do people care so much about what the opposite sex thinks?

•is my penis big enough, do guys like small boobs, do guys like a lot of makeup, am I dressing too inappropriate/modest, do guys and girls care about...

After 5 years of being on this site the opinions on here from men and women have absolutely no bearing in real. I believe it's because many members on here little to no life experiences. So my question is... why do people care so much about what the opposite sex thinks? It's all a matter of opinion that varies between each person. I get its a matter of attraction and self assurance but why can't people just be themselves and not give a shit about what someone thinks?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • We are human and have a need to be desired, loved and accepted, but have also been socially conditioned to believe we must fit a certain mold or cultural "norm" in order to get them.
    Our concept of value is defined by whether or not we feel we are being rejected or accepted by those around us.
    We are raised this way and its a survival instinct that we are born with.
    Its like a positive/negative reward system which is defined by and reenforced by our parents initially, and then by the culture in which you live.
    Sometimes, what is defined for us by our family and society, turn out to be wrong and cause us harm, but are so deeply ingrained in us, that they are hard to change in spite of being aware of the damage.
    As adults we either accept these definitions given to us and continue to conform to them, or we reject them and begin to challenge them and begin redefining our own value for ourselves. The latter often comes at a heafty price of societal rejection, of which you must come to terms with and make the decision to fight for yourself against the odds.

  • ... because we live in a World, where people only buy the book based on how the cover looks.

    Maybe it's about time we stop being stupid and just realise our imperfections are what make us beautiful. Look at a drawing the more imperfections the more it's a masterpiece.

    The human mind, which happens to be more complicated than the entire universe, is the last to go and we give it the least importance. Yet the looks which only last several years are given importance to the point where we spend millions on plastic surgeries.

    There are people dying in the world and suffering... yet we choose to only focus on something so small. Maybe because it's what makes the Upper Class rich, our low self esteem.

    • Thank you for MHO ♥

  • People ask questions because they want to know opinions. I grew up in a family of all girls & have no interactions with males. I'm not a man. I don't know how men act. It's not a lack of confidence or me not being myself. I'm just not exposed to the opposite sex enough to know certain things so I ask.
    It's also fun to see how the other side thinks. This question came off very condescending & judgmental. Where are humans & complicated. You said yourself that everything isn't black & white so let people ask there questions, take polls, & get feedback without labeling them as insecure people who don't know how to be & accept themselves.

Most Helpful Guys

  • My guess is we care about others opinion because we feel that if they think good of us they will stay with us. Then, usually we case about our SO's opinion. Or sometimes about our sexual partner's opinion. The point is we want they to stay with us.
    Why asking those questions here? Well, sometimes it isn't easy to ask your SO directly. Sometimes you don't have a gf/by but you want one. And you generalize asking to all females/males about it. Because that will give you an average.

    Taking this to a personal level I'd say that I wouldn't have a girlfriend I don't find attractive. I don't like big boobs. Should a girl who's fell for me be worried about her boobs' size? Probably. Then it isn't that crazy if I'm worried about my penis size, right?

    And please don't start talking about how the inside is more important than the outside. It's true I wouldn't have a girlfriend with perfect boobs if she's a b*tch. But the body is part of the equation. People knows that. That's why they worry about that.

  • This is a dumb question for the fact that this is a website to ask these sort of questions. This website is literally tailored so that we can ask questions of the opposite sex these questions.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KA_j7uhR4w0



    It's in our best interested to be appealing towards the opposite sex for obvious reasons. Logic tells me that we all care about what people think of us. In regards to dating, that's specified towards the opposite sex. People who say they don't care at all are the ones that care the most. We're very social creatures and strive to be accepted and admired by others. Psychology 101.

    • Once you start not caring about how someone feels about you and you start being confident in yourself then you'll never be happy. I'm 26, I truly do not care about what someone's says or their opinion because I know myself and learned confidence over the years. There are people who don't care. Don't always believe psychology 101.

    • "Don't always believe psychology 101." - I'm going to believe factual information that has been studied through trial and error for a multitude of years in a duration that can be described in a historical context over your opinion. There are people who have dedicated their life to studying this, and this concept that I'm explaining to you has been evidently proven as factual. You still care about other opinions just as everyone does. You're just in a rather optimistic mood right now. The next time you get rejected by a guy you really like, you're going to impacted by that. The same applies to the next time you lose out on a promotion to someone else when you worked your ass off for it. Confidence isn't to be described as not being impacted by these things. In the given context, it's to be described on how you handle the impact. Thinking that someone isn't impacted by the opinions of others is fallacious and driven to the extent of delusion. Your current mood doesn't transcend logic.

    • Psychology isn't always black and white. The human brain and emotions aren't fully understood and varies per person. You can believe whatever you desire however I choose not to go based on black and white studies. I've been rejected by a guy I like, I've been hurt, I've been turned down, I've been turned down a job and promotion. Overtime I became comfortable with it and realized there's other people out there and life isn't the end. there's always better opportunities.

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What Girls & Guys Said

9 19

  • It may be the more insecure users trying to find out ways to become more confident in themselves.

  • I've been wondering the same thing, I think it's probably lack of confidence and insecurities

  • You are so right, I asked people if they thought asexuality was weird and I felt shamed the whole time. I get input on here when no one seems to hit the nail on the head in my personal life, I just want to know what others think about it. But I don't ask people if they think I'm pretty on here I find that strange, also creates bait for trolls.

  • Because they want to impress them and be noticed by them

  • If you're truly liberated from caring what the opposite sex thinks, then why even ask the question? Why do you even care why other's care?

    On a side note: "Do these pants make my butt look big? "

    • It's not directed at me and how the opposite sex thinks about me. It's a question for the users. Difference

    • OK. I thought you were one of the users. I care what both sexes think about me. I pride myself on my appearance and work hard at keeping myself in shape. When a guy notices me, it makes me feel good about myself.

    • So you can't pride yourself in keeping your appearance up and keeping in shape to make yourself feel good in the assumptions of others? Gotcha

    • Show All

  • Because they have %100 of the genitalia we want if there was a neutral gender we wouldn't give a fuck what they thought about us.

  • People who are that insecure usually are for a reason. If I was a guy with a tiny dick I'd probably be self conscious about it too.

    .. this site also serves that purpose lol to ask what the opposite gender thinks of this and that. I agree that sometimes it can be like "come on-.-" but most times I can understand how things are from their perspective.

  • People by nature are extremely social and crave acceptance and validation. They want to know what the opposite sex thinks because that is who they are attracted to and want to win over.

  • ... Confidence is hard to come by so why not ask questions that will make you more confident going into a situation

  • Why would I care what other guys think of me?

    I'm not gay.

  • I agree with you... . Be yourself, people... .

  • cause hotter people have better genes and if you have something they want they will choose you, so we want to make sure we have what it takes to attract such attractive people and breed with them.

    basically survival of the fittiest with a twist.

    • So you're ugly and strive to be something you're not?

    • I dont think anywhere in my answer i mentioned anything like that so where did you get that from? are you the same chick from the other question?

    • From the other question? What are you talking about? You said hotter people have better genes. I'm asking if you felt ugly and feel as if you have to be "hot"

    • Show All

  • Because they want relationships or sex with the opposite sex.

  • As a FT working single dad... I certainly do not !! Agreed... an IDGAF attitude is actually attractive !!

  • Because people are low-key perfectionist when they want someone.

  • I don't

  • well unless you date yourself... you would want the opposite sex to find you attractive

    • Regardless of our flaws the opposite sex will find you attractive. Being insecure or needing self assurance is what makes you less likely to get a date. Men and women like confidence.

    • Yeah, I get you... I only meant humans are social and part of our sense of fulfillment is being accepted and recognized by society. It applies to relationship between both sexes. I like receiving compliments from girls and I know its the same the other way round. Self confidence is good, but sometimes its more satisfying when it comes from someone else.

  • Because if you are sexually attracted to them you want to be seen as a good mating partner. And if you are not you will get butthurt its called human nature.

  • We are genetically designed so. Its not only in human but in all living creatures. They want to show best to their opposite sex.

  • Asking why a heterosexual population is concerned with the opinions of the opposite sex is like asking why a priest might care what God wants.

    • Why does sexual orientation matter? Be yourself and you'll attracts someone who likes you, once you try being something and someone you're not. They like you for the person who aren't. Confidence is key for both sexes

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