Is role playing online cheating?

[Anonymous]

So I've done role play online for a few years now. It started out as cute little role plays where we'd act out a date or something but then I started getting good at it and it went into dirtier things. I started roleplaying sex with different people online. It's through my roleplaying account which has no personal info about myself or photos, and I'm just using words for the roleplay. I never send photos or do it irl. Does this count as cheating on my boyfriend? And should I tell him that I do this?

[Matt21]

after reading your post and responses to other people's opinions, I have to say that it surly sounds like emotional cheating.

you said you tried roleplaying but it doesn't work with your boyfriend. So you two need to find a way to work things out. He could be a little more willing to participate and you guys could try and be happy with being together in real life.

sometimes you can get bored when you're not with your boyfriend but try and turn that energy into something positive and plan him a surprise or something. I always do this with my lady and she does the same.

[Asker]

Thank you

[Matt21]

I hope that you two can't work things out :) it's just amazing when you can find someone to put all your effort into and if that guy doesn't allow you to do that then maybe you two are just too different

[ATuairiscean]

This is a depends situation - How open minded is your boyfriend - Some maybe threatened by it, others may see just as a kink on your part and not be bothered once they know you are not going beyond certain things

[Asker]

He's a very jealous guy, but expects for me to not get jealous

[ATuairiscean]

To me it is not cheating but it sounds like it is to him - I think it is a symptom of a larger issue from your remark

[Asker]

What do you mean

[ATuairiscean]

He is jealous of you but you can't be of him - Hints of control freak and double standards

[Anonymous]

Well I've done role play dates and sex online and I've had a boyfriend for three years in real life... I kinda dont think its cheating cause all they know us as is our characters... like, its my avatars boyfriend not mine... then again cheating is considered things that you wouldn't be able to show your partner Sooo... I don't know. But just letting you know you aren't the only one who has done it.

[SteppingOnRoses]

yes it is cheating

and i think you're addicted to it now

you should either:

a) tell boyfriend or not, but stop it for good. maybe ask help to a counselor.

b) break up with him if you dont want/cant quit the roleplaying.

and yes it is cheating. you're just too used to it now to notice.

[nationwantstoknow]

agree

[Wonderer89]

If you're getting explicitly aroused or giving/receiving sexual stimulus with another person then I'd call it cheating. Your partners definition may vary, so talking with him is probably best

[martyfellow]

You're paid for this I assume? It's just a job... but it's something most guys would find disturbing when you reveal it to them, I would have to say.

[Asker]

I'm not paid no

[martyfellow]

Really, just for fun? I've done that but not systematically with friends at times... most offs probably have.

[septemberangel118]

If he doesn't know and you are ashamed to tell him about it, then yes it's cheating.

[thatawkwardchik]

yes, it counts as cheating. but it's up to you if you tell him.

[BertMacklinFBI]

so you're sexting with strangers online whilst in a relationship.

lol

[ilovesexyfeet]

It can be viewed by some as cheating and I don't think he'll be too happy, however, you haven't actually done anything physical so I'm on the fence

[HonestGirlAlways]

I started typing this and changed my mind halfway through it. It's really just another form of masturbating. I don't think it's a big deal.

[Caaarl]

Yes.

[Caaarl]

Sexually or romantic role-playing is cheating. in my opinion. It's not possible to completely separate a role from reality 100%. Look at the Stanford Prison experiment as evidence.

[Caaarl]

Sexually or romantic role-playing is cheating. in my opinion. It's not possible to completely separate a role from reality 100%. Look at the Stanford Prison experiment as evidence.

[Caaarl]

Didn't mean to double post wth

[sadgirl2002]

Emotional cheating is still cheating lol

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I wouldn't want a girlfriend who role plays sexual with strangers online i would move on.

[JustinTheGreat]

It's basically sexting, I would say sexting is cheating

[savalisk]

If you are in a committed, serious relationship then I would stop this.
DnD roleplay is always fun. If it leads to two fictional characters ending up in a relationship, it doesn't seem like a problem until it turns into what you describe.

[ravedave]

Only if you're keeping it a secret from your partner. If you're upfront about it and he's okay with it, then it's fine.

[Asker]

So I should tell him?

[ravedave]

Definitely. I'd be prepared for him. To be a little upset, but it's better that you just tell him the truth.

[Asker]

How would you react if your girlfriend told you this

[ravedave]

Me personally? I'd be fine with it, both me and my partner are free to talk/sext with other people as long as nothing every gets physical

[Asker]

Do you sext with each other

[ravedave]

Occasionally, yeah. Usually we prefer physical pleasures though haha

[Asker]

Cause my boyfriend never does I've tried to with him but he won't even try it...

[ravedave]

It's definitely not for everyone, some people just aren't good at, or don't enjoy improvising and making up narratives.

[Blake0048]

Its fun but I don't know how I feel. On one hand it kinda is but at the same time its all stuff you'd never actually do with people you won't ever meet.

[SteppingOnRoses]

it is still cheating same as she went to a have ons with people she never will see again.

[Blake0048]

@SteppingOnRoses is it though? There's no physical contact. I just can't consider both examples of cheating. Its not that far off from looking at porn when you really think about it.

[SteppingOnRoses]

porn is a fantasy where you dont interact with people. it's watching a movie. in the other option you interact with other people, other than you partner, for some form of sexual pleasure. If it isn't physical cheating, then it is most certainly emotional cheating. cheating has to do with being disloyal. And that is what you are doing if you are with other people other than your partner, for things you should go to him for. Also there is the hiding...

[Decentguy]

doing that while being in a relationship? yes its cheating

[g30r9399biatch]

well kinda because cheatings is with your mind too not only ur body

[Akash72]

If u like it so much tyen u should do it with ur boyfriend
Problem solved

[Asker]

He doesn't want to though, that's the thing

[Akash72]

You take things in ur hand After all ur a girl Seduce him

[Akash72]

And by the way whats ur Roleplay account Hahahah joking

[Asker]

I've tried starting them with him and he always says that I shouldn't send him that stuff

[Akash72]

It means he knows u like roleplays Then ur free to do it on urself , and don't think ur cheating him because you already asked him for it

[Dalesmith]

nope it doesn't, i had one like that too when i was 18, it's just harmless fun no need to tell anyone lol

[DopeDuck]

Only if you show photos and do nasty things and type that I think would be cheating

[Asker]

I don't send photos. Just messages. Like what I'm doing now but it's a roleplay of some scenario

[DopeDuck]

That's fine I don't see why not

[tommy323]

no, plus they are super fun

[raul254]

I don't think it's considered as cheating as you're not physically doing anything wrong. Yet I think you shouldn't be hiding it and let him know about it. maybe some of those rp's could get real ☺