How do I get my girl to masturbate?

[quietbutsexyman]

Ok so here's the story. I've been with her for about 2 years and although we had a rough last year sexually (I was fighting a UTI that really took all my sex drive away), we're normally really steamy in bed. We try everything, when we're on our game our sex is GREAT, and I have no complaints. However, my girlfriend has NEVER had an orgasm. I last more than long enough to give her one and I've had previous experience with oral and physical stimulation as well, it's just that I have no direction in terms of how to give her an orgasm. With previous girlfriends, they all knew what they needed to get an orgasm and so I could easily fulfill their needs when they would tell me what to do. But my present girlfriend was a virgin before me, and she refuses to masturbate or do anything to give herself an orgasm. I've been trying to get her to open up but all she says is that she "loves what I do" and that she probably just can't get an orgasm. I, on the other hand, think that she hasn't ever really tried to get one or give herself one. And how can I give her one if she doesn't even know what she needs to get one? All I want is for her to explore her body and tell me what feels best for her so that she can climax. How can solve this problem? Any suggestions anyone? And for you girls out there, were you able to get your first orgasm from masturbation or from a guy? And for guys, any way to handle this if you've faced similar situations?

[burlkitten414]

I think she's uncomfortable for some reason. Maybe she's a little insecure about you pressuring her or insecure about herself? Have you tried turning off the lights and slowing down? Maybe sex isn't what she needs, maybe it's just foreplay alone, NO sex (sorry that might be hard). I know it took me forever to finally have an orgasm the first time(s) with a guy, but I definitely knew what I did right for myself. Like your gf, it took years for me (and sometimes still feels a little awkward) to feel comfortable having someone watch me masturbate. Don't put the pressure on, she probably does know how to please herself, just not in front of you. I know watching porn helped to put me in the right mood, but I don't know if she's that kind of girl.

[John-Bee]

I can see why you would feel uncomfortable but boy it sure is a turn on for me. I like it if I walk into the bedroom & she is getting started.

[cutekate]

I'm a virgin, so I've never gotten an orgasm from a guy. But, I have gotten one from masturbation. If she really wants one. she'll masturbate in her own time. Try not to pressure her, she seems to be insecure about it. It seems like you really want her to have pleasure too, you're not just focused on your own pleasure. which I think is so sweet. Keep trying to make her feel good, as long as she feels comfortable with it.

[mimi4]

you have to do it yourself to get an orgasm first time. you won't be able to get it from a guy first

[istagreatone]

lots of women will not be able to orgasm unless they are totally relaxed and totally comfortable. apparently she is not totally comfortable. she has to let go of being shy in the bed, especially if she is a virgin. she has no past horrors that should keep her from opening up to you. I had a girlfriend that could come when she was on top, the way she got off, I couldnt. then I had a girl who could only get off by oral. you need to make your girl totally comfortable. start with a massage to loosen her up and just have her relax. once she gets there, her body may do the rest for her.

[sanam]

Very nice!!!!

[dakadan]

I wouldn't worry about it. She probably has had an orgasm and just didn't know it. Many women are expecting these big fireworks to happen and sometimes they don't. Don't worry it is not a reflection on you. Having said that you could buy her a vibrator and make that part of your sex play. My partner and I use them all the time.

[WaitingAtTheDoor]

I expressed how important it was to me to better understand her body and how I can provide for her. In this situation, my ex now, was just embarassed for me to see how she did it. It wasn't wierd, she just thought it was.