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Why do girls want sex?

I can easily see why guys like sex - because the vagina is a soft warm delicious tunnel of love that being inside makes it effortless to orgasm.... Show More

Most Helpful Opinion

  • Sexuality is different for everyone, it's not just something that can be labeled for a male or female. Every person has their own types of turn ons and offs, and how much drive they have. Yes, some girls prefer cuddling and talking, but that's just a personality trait, not an explicitly female trait. I consider myself to be a very sexual person, if I see a hot guy it turns me on. If we hang out and he seems sexually driven too-I just want to touch him and be all over him. I want our bodies to intertwine and just to feel the closeness and the lust and the drive is enough pleasure for me to be content and relatively happy. If I have an orgasm, It feels even better and just adds fuel to the fire that I call a sexual experience. But I have a different personality than some girls, so the "want" for sex could be completely different for them. Having an emotional connection makes sex wonderful and it makes girls feel safe and comforted, but if you have a physical connection it could make sex hot and fun and experimental and wild, in any case orgasm is a bonus. It really just depends on what your mentality is and what you expect going into the situation. I hope this answer cleared any of your questions up :)

    • Thanks for your response! You mentioned that "it depends on what your mentality is". What IS the mentality of women and sex (for you, at least?) Is it to feel good, or is it to be close to someone? If you could be close to someone without having sex, would that be better? Is sex ever a "bother" or a "chore" you have to deal with to keep your guy happy?

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    • You think too much. I do the same thing but I try to manage it. Here is some encouragement, just relax and don't over process things too much, I promise life will be much more enjoyable that way. Roll with the punches, keep your mind open, and a perfect woman will find her way to you. Be spontaneous, chicks dig that (I know I do). You seem like the kind of guy who'll be the lucky 1 in 10 to be with a girl that'll make your dreams come true. :) Any girl would be lucky to have you.

    • OMG that's so optimistic! I gave up looong ago looking for Ms. Right (joke: we all know fairy tales are frauds), I'm so fully aware of the deep-water odds of finding a girl who likes sex that my ship is drifting, powerless, and lost at sea.

What Girls Said 17

  • it feels good to us also.. and our body craves it just like yours

    • Wow! It's weird to hear you say that girls "crave' sex...I'm having a really hard time imagining that's even possible...Is it possible?

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    • So many girls are describing "closeness", "to make him happy" and "love" as strong motivators but so far yourer the only one that I've read that has said a girl can "crave" sex. Would I be wrong to assume you prefer all those 3 things ~first~ before you get all craving horny? Or does your body have a "crave" mode independent of your emotional objectives?

    • no I don't need to feel like I love him.. if that was the case I would rarely have sex... love is hard to find but your body wants what it wants...

  • Depends on the girl, me, I want sex only with someone I wnt that kind of deep connection with. it's the ultimate setting down eachother's guards and it get's mroe appealing as time goes on, not having shared it with anyone yet. For me love needs to be apparent, if I feel like he doesn't really love me, then sex is very unappealing.

  • I'm a virgin, I've never had sex, I have a couple toys and honestly I might not be as horny as a guy (ive heard they think about sex every ten seconds) but when I'm really craving sex I have to masturbate once, sometimes even twice a day. I'm not a virgin by choice simplly by circumstance I mean I don't have any need to have random toughtless sex with a random person. so to say I crave it like a man, I don't think that would ever be possible. but we do crave it. Also I could never get turned on enough to simply do it with someone I wasn't attracted to, I've heard some guys say it doesn't matter as long as its got a vagina. I crave sex and I've never even experianced the real thing yet. and even if I didn't reach my orgasum it does feel good its like water on the driest of day even a little can help and a down pour can't really quench your thirst but it still feels good. I've heard friends say that often if the guy cums before she does the guy will often finnish her off with oral.

    • You're not demanding too much, trust me. It makes your first time much more meaningful and amazing.

  • I love sex. I love the initmacy, the feeling, the ways the body's intertwine. I feel like a guy for saying this but I can't live without sex. I have tried. I was abstinent for 2 years, and it was terrible... I didn't need emotion during sex, because sex to me was just a physical fullfillment. Crazy I know, but sex with my exFWB was completely different from "making love" with my crush. There are just different levels of love, lust, intimacy, feeling, and the bond. I had never experienced "making love" until recently, and my whole perspective of sex changed. Maybe because there are real emotions involved now, but sex has become more than a physical hunger. I do it to make him feel good and not for my own orgasm anymore. It's just the satisfaction that he enjoyed himself is enough. Maybe this guy is just really special to me, but the two times we have had sex I didn't come either time but I keep going back to him. =]

    • Wow! That's fascinating. I wish I could understand why girls want to have sex because I see so many reasons why she wouldn't want it at all...

  • I've had sex several times but have never reached orgasm in sex which is a little sad... The reason I like it, is because it feels good..mostly, and I'm secretly searching for the guy that can make me come! I just love the whole experience, foreplay and talking...and hopefully one day orgasm :P

    • I believe in the "pleasure principle", but girls are not guaranteed pleasure; more like a "comfort condition" where the guy gets an exceedingly disproportionate amount of the "pleasure" compared to the girl...is it a fleeting pleasure for girls? Because it sure doesn't seem like a sure thing for her.

  • For girls, sex is not just something physical. It is something emotional as well. Girls can be just emotionally satisfied during sex and thus not have an orgasm. Girls just like the closeness with their men and of course they like to feel so loved. But some girls just love the physical side of sex..

    • Just is such a great answer and one I've heard a hundred times before...but as a guy...I just don't get it! I must be an idiot.

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    • What would you tell a guy that feels guilty for seeking his own pleasure knowing she may not want to have an orgasm? I mean he -tries- to give her pleasure, and maybe she does get pleasure, but she falls short of "orgasm". To a guy this seems so incredibly selfish and, in a way, that he's "using" her...know what I mean? I don't want to be seen as a selfish d*** (sorry for the pun), but I get off knowing she wants me...and not feeling "used" in the process...see what an idiot I am!?

    • I love my boyfriend very much and sometimes it is just enough to simply have sex. I don't always want to orgasm. Having no orgasm can be satisfactory too! No need to feel guilty!

  • I mean craving physically. Girls get horny, and our bodies "need" sex, if you will. I know for me, there are times where I just really want to have sex in the same way that sometimes I'm tired and need sleep, and sometimes I'm hungry and need food.

    • I just don't see girls acting (or especially) thinking this way...I find it so impossible to think that girls crave sex when they could easily have it any time they want...Craving (to me) involves some amount of 'scarcity', because it's impossible to crave something that is so easy to get. I would have to say I categorize girls as closer to repulsion towards sex because they -know- that IS what guys are after and (it would seem to me) that girls would more "resent" guys for being pigs than craving them.

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    • Don't be sad, and you're definitely not a loser. Your concern is genuine. Many girls are intimidated by sex, but very few are actually repulsed by it. You may be involving yourself with girls you "just aren't read", but girls who are comfortable with themselves and comfortable with you will enjoy having sex just as much as you do.

    • I wish it were true. I've heard that people should be casual and free to express themselves sexually but so far I haven't met any girls who are like this...

  • 1) Our bodies crave sex just like yours do. We want it, it feels good, and it is actually physically really good for us.2) It makes us feel close to somebody we love. If I really love somebody, it's a sign of intimacy, trust, and commitment. 3) We like making guys happy. If a boy we love wants sex, it simply feels good to know that you are doing something nice for someone you care about.

    • It's hard to imagine a girl "craving sex" since I'm not a girl and I've never heard of a girl ever saying anything like this. Do you mean "craving" as in hypothetical, not physical; like a girl might "crave" a new pair of shoes? When a guy thinks of "craving" it's like we get all light headed, because all the blood rushes to our penis away from our head! Craving to a guy is an insanely powerful rush that overwhelms every cell and every thought. I've never met a girl describe anything like this.

  • i love this question. Sex is more than just the amount of orgasms that you can get if you can't even get one. it's the relationship that you build with your partner. even casual, one-night stands are relationships...just brief ones like some people's marriages. for girls...most girls, it's all about that connection you have with your partner...it's trust...security...comfort...closeness and every conceivable mushy word you can think of. the other part of it is that just as guys need to have sex so does a girl. we're sexual beings and once that "cherry has been popped" the need is always there clawing you like an itch you can't scratch. I know I feel like something is missing when I go too long without

    • I wonder if this "need" is actually "real" with girls, though...I mean, I want to believe what you say, but there is a very real discrepancy between what people "want" and what they "get". Guys want sex but can't get a girl so some go to a prostitute...if girls "really" liked sex, the prostitute would be more than willing to provide sex for "free" because she (ostensibly) wanted it on the same level as the guy. If girls "really" liked sex then why aren't there more gigolos (or less prostitutes)?

    • you see there is stigma attached when I woman proclaims that she wants sex as badly as any man. you call her a whore, prostitute, a bad thing...taking the whole "a lady in the street but a freak in the bed" so far that it is inhibiting. so why voice the fact that we like sex when the ramifications of uttering such a context is so high? yes we do like it but not when your name has to be dragged through the mud and your whispered about behind your back

  • cuz its awesomethink of it this way, you orgasm when you masterbate, the orgasm just feels better when your with a woman. for a woman, it feels better the whole time, but she can orgasm later when she masturbates lol.women come when they do very specific things, so that's why its hard for lovers to do that for them..

  • I like sex because I need it. I want it. It feels great. I can orgasm with a guy I don't love, but for me to fully enjoy it I need to have an emotional connection with him.Sex with someone I love is the best thing ever in the world. Ever ever. There are a thousand conversations that take place and not one word ever has to be spoken. There most often is, but it's not completely necessary. I crave the heat, the noise, the touch, everything about it, more than I crave sleep. Being able to say my preferences to him takes a lot of trust. Then when he acts on them with stunning accuracy while not really knowing if he's doing it right (barring my immediate response), it tells me that he truly cares about pleasing me. It is like winning an auditory lottery if he can't help but make noise or say things when I'm lovin' on him. I don't always need to orgasm, but I will admit that I sometimes feel it's not fair if I don't. Sex is the one activity in which I think everything should be fair. I don't need to orgasm every single time because...well, I like marathons and sometimes it's not physically possible. Sometimes I just want his touch, and not so much the intense physical sensations.The only bad sex I've ever had was when I garnered "extraordinary" and "phenomenal" for my efforts, and the jerk blamed me for the fact that he never could make me orgasm.

    • It's answers like this that give a guy truly false hope. You describe sex as if it were told by a guy-- but women don't feel like you do or it would be common knowledge. Common knowledge is that girls avoid sex, hate guys for "wanting their body" and would much rather cuddle and talk than have a penis inside them. It makes me very sad to hear stories about girls like you because I think you're lying and being mean by saying these things. I WANT girls to like sex, but it hurts to know they don't.

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    • It's so sad to hear you want sex like this because I know it would never happen. If your guy looked at you like that every day after a while you'd reject him because you'd accuse him of "only wanting sex"...

    • Hmmm...don't go putting thoughts in my head, now. Some days clearly won't work for reasons out of my control. My guy and I are only in the beginning stages. If it goes long term, he stays faithful to me and still looks at me with lust every day -because I don't cheat and I think he's sexy- then isn't regular sex the best way to show someone you love them unconditionally, the ultimate acceptance of another person?

  • i enjoy the emotional closeness and the physical feeling. I don't always orgasm but I can honestly say I don't always feel a need to orgasm! whether or not I come I find sex with my partner still amazing. emotional aspect is imponrtant for me though. I tried casual sex once, we didn't love each other, and I can honestly say I couldn't orgasm and felt pretty rubbish after because having had sex like that I realized it wasn't the sex I missed, it was that closeness to another person and I just felt very empty and down for the next few days. happily, now I'm in such a great relationship and having the feeling of love running parallel with the lust magnifies the experience and the feelings a million times and that is what my body craves. its why I don't get aroused by seeing a random fit guy walking around naked, but if I think about my other half I get all sorts of urges!

    • That is so amazing! As a guy I really have no way of empathizing with what you say about not "needing' an orgasm. I get the "physical reaction to your partner" part, but as a buy I can see a beautiful woman and get very sexually aroused (not in a bad way where I want to rape or anything, but it does -feel- good to see a beautiful woman) Rambling now...So essentially sex for girls is more emotional than physical?

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    • So a great connection on an emotional level is the right key to her pants?

    • yes definitely lol .. though if I found out a guy was only pretending to feel an emotional connection with me I would be pretty devastated so be careful and don't hurt anyone just to get laid :P

  • I like the pressure. I like the fact that it's with someone I love. I like that it makes him happy also.

    • Clear trend here for "closeness" as a motivator...Can you elaborate on this feeling you describe as "pressure"?

  • Sex is about more than just an orgasm. The organism is the end, which seems to be the main attraction for guys, but for girls, the journey is just as important, if not more. Sure, I would love to have an orgasm every time. But the lead up to the orgasm is what is really enjoyable. The best sex I've had has not been when he was trying to get us to the orgasm, but when we went slow and just enjoy it, lived in the moment. It feels amazing to have sex. It's not just the orgasm that makes it feel good. Girls crave sex too because we want the physical pleasure. Yes, sex is a physical craving for girls as well as for guys. Because it feels good for us too. We want the pleasure like you do- for us it's just more about the journey than the destination.

  • Because we enjoy it ?

    • If girls enjoy sex, then why is there so much difficulty getting a girl in the mood? If she liked it, would she naturally want to do it?

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    • My girlfriend says the same thing that you do. Oh I wish I could have sex right now, she says, but when I offer she always says, maybe later. ALL girls are ALL talk and no action.

    • woah, don't judge us all by what your girlfriend does, I'm my own person.

  • I think for some reason, girls just aren't as open about wanting sex. But I agree with the answers here in that it's just something we desire for whatever reason. It's definitely about the physical touch and feeling really close to whomever you're with. And, we also happen to be caring, loving, and relatively selfless. We don't always mind if you get greater pleasure than we do.

    • Do you find it easy to say "no" to sex?

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    • You never know until you try.

    • That's my point! You would rather wait until marriage not having any idea if you were sexually compatible...It must be very easy for you to say no to sex with such stakes at hand...

What Guys Said 2

  • Girls its your answer time !

    • I guess by the very few girls who respond that they REALLY don't "want" sex. Without ANY doubt they certainly don't want it on any level even remotely approaching the "desire" that a guy has... It's more like girls are trained to ~resist~ sex; NOT "want" it...

  • From what I understand, girls have a very different set of feelings and expectations from sex. First of all, they have way more nerve endings in their vaginas than we do in our penises. This is why girls will frequently act like they're being over the top...because it is actually more intense than we experience it. Women can have two different kinds of orgasms too so if it isn't working one way, it's good to try it the other way (I actually just found out how to have the other kind of guy orgasm but I won't get into that now). I've been with several women who weren't interested in having an orgasm at certain times. They just wanted to feel sexy and desirable and close to me. They also wanted to just focus on my pleasure because it made them happy to make me happy. They get a huge emotional kick out of sex generally and that is what non-orgasmic satisfaction tends to refer to.Also from what I understand, a lot of what you said in the second part is true, it's a huge disappointment with certain guys. No one likes having a selfish partner, sexually or otherwise.

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