Ex wants to be FWB?

[Anonymous]

So my ex of over 4 years ago told me he thinks I should be his FWB... I told him no that I didn't want to ruin what we have now... which an awesome friendship.. I'm not going to lie I do deep down want to and because I miss him and only he could make me feel the way that he does... yes I KNOW this is already starting bad because I'm playing with fire being that I know all he wants is a friends with benefits and I'm being hopeful.. (kinda)... before he told me this and I was around him I could hold my ground I could be myself and not care about what or who he was doing anything with... now that he's told me this... when he texts me I get overwhelmed.. when he calls I talk to him… we don’t have any kids we were together for 1.5yrs… he cheated on me TWICE.. so we called it quits.. we did the friends with benefits before and I was OK with it… or led him to believe I was… but I stopped because I knew I was going to get territorial again and I didn’t want to screw it up again… so we stopped… how do I stop thinking about this and go back to the way It was prior to him telling me this? oh and then we start hanging out just us again… lunch movies… etc… he said all he wants is a friends with benefits is he really trying to get me to do it? or should I cut ties while I’m ahead… I love this guy I will always love him.. but I don't know what to do

[binkybabiii]

The whole point of having friends with benefits is to have discreet sex with no strings attached. by no strings, this means you guys CAN NOT have feelings for each other. You said that you'll "always love this guy". You can't be FWB in these circumstances. Things will only get in the way. If he starts seeing other girls and you 'love' him then emotions will fire and you two will just be chasing each other on a merry-go-round. He's wasted nearly 2 years of your life already move on and find someone better who won't CHEAT on you. The whole fact that you're still seeing him shows that you have interest for him. A guy who has cheated probably says "I've changed" but the fact that he insists on casual sex shows that he's in no shape to commit. Ditch the wanker.

[reeltaulks]

Love him from a distance until whatever feelings you have for him dies! Love, well I should say the power that the word love describes goes way beyond this guys character as well as intentions. Maybe you do sincerely Love him, but he doesn't Love you! The essence of Love does not promote self centeredness, pain, unbalance, the list goes on. Cut whatever ties you have or just man up and discipline your emotions. I don't see anything wrong with you entertaining him at your convenience, but I see something wrong with you having him string you along. Did you forget that in your committed relationship he cheated on you twice. He's a zip zero, be stingy with your coochero lol CiaO

Vonda G. Nelson

[seashore-pal]

Cut all ties with this guy! He's not worth your time and you deserve way better. I agree with the users on here who have said he's manipulative and douchebag. You should be with someone who knows your worth and treats you with equal respect and love that you'd be willing to give. I say cut your losses and run, honey!

[islands7]

Deep down you want to, so do it.

If he gets territorial, stop again.

Keep shopping in case this becomes a carosel and you want to get off fast with another guy, instead of worrying on GAG. You have control over this situation, unless you are afraid of him. If so, run now!

[Asker]

YOU'RE RIGHT! I did want to... I gave in but it was differnt... so we stayed friends...

[Anonymous]

Sounds like he's a master at manipulating you. Eventually he will probably get his way. I would advise you to cease all contact with him so you can move on instead of getting hurt over and over.

[Asker]

you see I've tried that time and time again... sounds like a broken record... HOWEVER we bowl together and not intentionally... it always just happens that we end up on the same team or at the same place... he knows what kind of hold he has on me and that sucks... so when I do give him the cold shoulder he knows how to work his way back into my life.. :( but you are right

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe go to a different bowling alley? I know it seems unfair for you to have to move... but you have to do what you have to do to move on. Or at the very least go at a different time/night as him.

[Asker]

i know what you mean but we are in the same league majority of the time because we have the same friends and such and we are also in the same bowling club and lol yea I think these are all excuses...

[LostWonder94]

No,this guy just wants your body,not you,You are a woman,do not disrespect your body like that,Find a guy that will truly appreciate you for who you are and love you not just your body,This dood sounds like a bad person

[Asker]

Thank he is a DOUCH!

[LostWonder94]

Welcome!And he sounds like it,most guys are douche bags xD you just have to find that right guy that will love you for who you are,not for your body :) good luck ^^

[lolabee]

WTF? This guy who was your boyfriend at one time is basically telling you he just wants to have sex with you for HIS benefit, not yours. This isn't even a respectful friendship. He seems very manipulative...not healthy.

[filiasan]

I've dealt with this kind of guy before. He misses the sex. Of course he doesn't care about you. He's just too lazy (or coward) to get himself a real girlfriend. If you really want to, just have a one night stand. Maybe it'll remind you of why you left in the first place.

[Anonymous]

screw him