ok so my guy goes pretty darn fast, is that my fault, ok so ya I guess it would be but is that bad? what can I do to help out with that, at least he doesn't stop after he cums the first time but just wanted some thoughts on this.
everyone says take it slow.but its kinda hard, I try to slow him down, by pulling him close to me (he likes to sit up and go at it) so he doesn't really like to slow it down.any other suggestions?
Some guys need to learn how to last longer. Others just can't last that long the first time. You can help him with both problems.
If he just isn't experienced. Try to tease him a little, but when he gets worked up, pull back a little and leave his penis alone. Allow it to get used to the attention. Don't let him come so quickly. If he starts getting excited.make him stop thrusting. Keep him completely still. when the urge to come passes.he can start thrusting again. the more sex you have, the more you work at it, the longer he will learn to last.
If it is the other problem though, most guys can last a whole lot longer after he cums once. If the first time is really really quick, then try giving him a bj first. After he cums, keep sucking him off until he is hard again. When this happens, get on and go at it. Chances are he will last much longer for you, and he will be delighted that sex wasn't over in a few minutes.
Generally, slow down. Most of the work is his, learning where his "point of no return is" and learning to come off it. Your job is when he gets to that point, slow down. Nibble his ear, shake hands, make biscuits, whatever, just don't push him over the cliff.
P.S.: If you can be helpful and patient while he works this out, he'll adore you forever for it.
Some guys just have an over sensitive penis. There are condoms that have a desensitizing solution on the inside so that the penis will not feel as much for a few minutes that way he can last longer, they also make a topic cream that does the same thing. Just be warned for some guys this works and for others it works too well meaning that it could make his penis so desensitized that he doesn't feel anything and can't keep a hard on, if that happens it's not him and it's not you and please don't make him feel insecure about it. Just wait a few minutes and then have a go at it again.
It's not your fault and it's not his fault. He can't control his and it is a huuuge problem for guys with it. I have it myself and it kills me. I don't try to get with any girls because I know I will just be a disappointment for them.
The best thing you can do is take it slow. If he feels like he might come have him eat you out for a while and then let him go back at it. The first ejaculation always comes sooner than the second, so maybe give him head first and then he can finger you and then f***.