How to get over craving someone sexually?

[Anonymous]

So here is my dilemma: I met this guy two years ago and it was instant fireworks. Instant intense sexual attraction. But he was taken and I had heard he had cheated on his girlfriend already. I have no idea if it was reciprocated but the behavior he had around me led me to believe so which just made me obscessed more. Anyway, nothing happened because I don't like messing around with other girls' boyfriends. The year ended, we moved apart. And to my own despair I kept fantasizing about him in a sexual way. I kept wanting him and lusting for him. I very rarely saw him though, and I don't know what his "feelings" were ( lust or not.. whatever..) I only know that he kept the reationship with his girlfriend, she got pregnant and that he recently became the father of a beautiful little girl. I know this because we sort of kept in touch in a friendly way. But still, even though he's taken, even though he now has a family, I still crave him sexually. And I feel guilty about it. So how can I stop this? I am not in a relationship right now and there is no one that I am "eying " for future relationship prospect .. or even sex prospect.. Am I right to feel guilty? (I mean I'm not doing anything harmful since it's just a fantasy..)

[Fiorie13]

you didn't do anything wrong, so don't feel guilty.

But I mean he is a dad, so don't act on these feelings.

Just take out this frustration on your next partner, and if after a few times you still feel built up towards the other guy then maybe consider telling him?

Because suppressing something for too long is bad for you.

and if you have this guy in the back of your mind while you're with other guys it might turn out to be bad...

[l-hedoniste]

He's hot, he's loose, he's into you--I'd be all over that. Like hell he's taken, we both know he's not invested in that relationship at all.

He's yours for the asking. Don't be silly, go and claim your man.

[Asker]

haha, pretty straight to the point. Though I don't know if you're being serious or not. If you are, well I don't know if you're right but I'm not a homewrecker. And if you're not, your answer really made me laugh out loud.

[l-hedoniste]

Totally serious. Homewrecker? Don't make this something it's not. We're not talking about some thirty-year marriage here, but a girlfriend that he's iffy about. If anything, you have *more* of a place in his life than she does; at least he's hot for you.

[Anonymous]

You're not right for feeling guilty, you haven't done anything wrong.

You can't really stop yourself from fantasing about it. I'd say over indulge yourself in the fantasy and do it more often. Eventually you'll get bored and sick of the same fantasy and should stop thinking about him (Aversion therapy).

I had something similar happen with someone and I found that this helped.

[Chrissy1986]

nothing to feel guilty about if your not acting on these feelings

[ROTFLMFAO]

You need to date a man who's superior to him (then you'll stop fantasizing about the guy in a sexual way).