Sexual Relationships
+1 y

What happens now? We kissed and he kinda fingered me but he has a girlfriend?

So I really like my bffs cousin (we are both 18). He'd hug me n tease me about me liking him, I never admitted to it. My bff asked him if he liked me, he said no. Once he spent the day with us n he'd hug me by my waist n hold my hand. We spooned on the bed, n he'd tickle me n fell on the floor wrestling. His face was so close to mine I tought he'd kiss me but didn't. He then ignores me for 2 weeks & shows up with a gf. They've been dating a month. Recently we went to Hershey for spring break. My bff, another guy friend (his dad who went as chaperone since they r minors 15 & 16) him and I. He'd tease me n hug me. Once he leaned near & I kissed his cheek, later that day he kissed my cheek back. While at a gas station he leaned in close again I pecked him on the lips. At the park, he'd tease saying to "do it here & now" & he'd ride a ride with me if I gave him a "blow". That night I gave him my ice cream and he kissed me on the lips, then again when he got in the car. They were quick pecks though. On the ride home, he was sitting in the middle seat n I in the back. Both our friends were asleep. He reached back n started rubbing my leg. Then started fingering me through my leggings. We made out as it went along. He tried to put his hand down my pants but I wouldn't let him. I told him to stop but he said that he knows I love it. I let him keep touching me through my pants though. The next day we sat near each other n he kept touching my thigh & butt. He has a gf though & I feel horrible but also happy bc 1) it was my first kiss & 2) I enjoyed what we did. Do I talk to him and ask what's going to happen now or if it was just a fling? Should he tell his gf & if he doesn't should I? I don't want to be his play thing.
Talk to him about it
Vote A
Ignore that anything ever happened
Vote B
Tell his gf
Vote C
Don't tell his gf
Vote D
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Girl Guy
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+1 y
I talked to him about it and I told him I like him he said he likes me back but also likes his gf. He told her we just kissed so I told her everything. She hates me now n avoids me. I asked him to keep his distance from me n he is.
+1 y
They are still together, she gave him a 2nd chance n wanted n apology from me. He keeps telling me he likes me n doesn't wanna lose me n if we can still be friends...I don't know should we?
0 0

Most Helpful Girls

  • You mentioned here as well, that You have a boyfriend. So it appears you have this Big thing, Now Fling, going on as well with his kissing cousin. You're no longer saying "No," to anything he does, and although he has this so-called "girlfriend," is telling me he is Not Into her as much as he is----More Into you. I don't see you as his "plaything."
    Time for a pow wow. Sit him down and have a talk. I am seeing some chemistry here, and for some reason, I don't think it's All about octopussy arms. If he really cared about the Other girl on his arm, he wouldn't be fingering and feeling you And----Possibly trying to nab you from his cousin.
    Have this talk soon. Find out where he stands, and do some serious soul searching yourself before---anything else gets out of hand.
    Good luck.xx

    • I could be mistaken that this is "best friend female..." okay? You don't have a boyfriend...

    • No, I don't have a boyfriend. He's my best friends cousin. She's been telling me that she can feel the chemistry between us. Their family has noticed also but they don't know he has a girlfriend because of his overly religous mother. These feelings have been going on for almost a year now. I've been trying so hard to soul search but I keep getting drawn to him. I honestly thought there would be something between us but just recently he gets a gf. It made me feel like it was my fault for not showing like I was interested in him when he'd hug me or tease me. I'd treat him like the annoying brother but only cuz I was scared he didn't like me back n was just fooling around. Then this happened n it just makes me feel horrible bc I helped him cheat on his gf. And even if he did break up with her and went out with me what's stopping him from cheating on me with someone else?

    • It hit me about the boyfriend thing last nite, and quickly changed it...sorry...Long day..lol...I do see a chemistry, is why my inclinations told me he liked you for more than the sex...And being he did fool with you with this gf, tells me he is not into her or he would have stayed loyal...I know what you mean, can you trust him if he were to leave her for you? I always say life is a gamble, although in love, it is always this. You should have a talk with him. Is it certain, could you really know, if he would Leave her for More happiness, for I see his scenario here? And if he did, if he really would come to love you in a relationship, he will stay loyal. I know, for Now, he really is Into you...it's a start. Don't make the mistake of being friends with benefits.xx

  • Well, you are currently his play thing and you seem pretty darn happy about having that position. So MANY times you could have stopped his actions, or not initiated getting physical, and yet you continued to do so because you loved every bit of it. Morally, I think its gross behavior. If you had a boyfriend who was out fingering another girl, would you appreciate that? Exactly.

    You can talk to him if you want about where things are going, but don't expect him to leave his girlfriend for you. AND, if he does, dont expect him to be loyal to you. After all, he is cheating on his GIRLFRIEND with YOU.

    Be careful how you get a guy, because you just might lose them in the very same way.

    • I am not happy about having this position. I want to be happy because I had never been kissed before and being a hormonal teen I enjoyed what happened. It makes me sick to my stomach though. I'm not that kind of girl, I don't know what happened to me. And I know I would be furious if my boyfriend would be kissing and feeling another girl. I really doubt he'll leave her for me, and I wouldn't be comfortable being in a relationship with him if he's a cheater. But what if his feelings are actually real for me? And he truly likes me and there's chemistry (unlikly but what if) and thats why what happened happened? I really do like this guy, and I know his gf she's a friend of mine, we're not close but we've known each other for years. I hate that I did this to her and she's clueless about her cheating bf.

    • Sorry, but I'm not buying what you're saying. You sound smarter than what you're leading on to. Saying things like you being "a hormonal teen" does not excuse behavior. Why? Because you are knowingly doing something that is hurtful to some one you claim is your "friend". And don't use the excuse of having never been kissed. You continue doing what you're doing because you honestly DON'T CARE. And you not caring says something about your character and lack thereof.

    • Its like you can't be that desperate to hurt someone else and to have absolutely no dignity. What you're doing lacks class, self respect for yourself and anyone else. But if this is how you wish to handle the situation, then do what you must. But whatever you put out, that is what you will get in return. One word: karma

  • I doubt he wants anything more from you than to mess around now and then, but if he does happen to want to leave the other girl for you, he will cheat on you too.

Most Helpful Guys

  • I'm no expert on relationships but first talk to him if he says it's over then don't let him be alone with for a little while weeks maybe months try not to think of him like that, if he says he will dump his gf then tell him he won't be able to kiss or touch you until he does if he tell his gf and ends up with you ask yourself do you trust him. Maybe cheating for him isn't a one time thing. If you feel guilty or not I recommend you tell his gf if he continues to hit on you while still in his relationship

    Respect yourself and others everyone is important
    Hope this helps

  • yet another example of a girl falling for an asshole. he is cheating on his gf , doesn't that tell you right there what kind of guy he is? he is only using you as a sex toy and you like it

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What Girls & Guys Said

2 1

  • You might have enjoyed what you did but don't be fooled. He saw the chance to play and have fun with you, but I don't think it will go anywhere else.

  • Nothing should happen now he has a girlfriend. Tell him if he wants to be with you then he needs to break up with his girlfriend.

  • He is OBVIOUSLY playing you.
    Cry a river, build a bridge and get over it.
    Don't let him touch you ever again.

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