Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
It seems to be a very common misconception around GAG that a hymen is some physical representation of virginity and that it must be destroyed, popped, torn, ripped and so on. I find this really concerning especially when grown adults believe this myth, which is scientifically very very incorrect! I am here to explain the science behind the hymen!
All it takes is a basic preschool level understanding of the human body to get why the "magical disappearing hymen" myth is ridiculous. When you were a toddler and you scraped your knee did you expect your body to reject your knee completely and have it fall off? Did you expect the injured skin on your knee to disappear forever leaving an open skin-less patch where you injured yourself? I would hope not! Even as a toddler you knew that damaged skin heals and rebuilds itself, you knew that you would look under that band-aid one day soon and that your scraped up skin would be healed up like new! So why do we think differently about the hymen?
THE REALITY: The hymen is just like any other skin on your body if it is torn or ripped it won't fall off! Studies have shown that a torn hymenal membrane takes on average only 48 hours or two days to heal completely! The hymen is also NOT a complete seal over the vaginal opening it is usually more of a crescent moon shape or that of a ring. The only reason a hymen might cover the entire vaginal opening or even partially cover it is because of a rare physical mutation, these types of hymens can not be "broken" or "popped" during sex either, a simple surgical procedure to give the hymen a normal crescent shape is required in these rare cases.
*fun fact: Hymen comes from the Greek word hymen, meaning membrane. Another name for it is the Vaginal Corona.
Bleeding from first time vaginal sex usually isn't even from the hymen!
Hymens are actually very elastic and difficult to tear, they usually just stretch easily out of the way. The real reason women bleed during sex is because of friction against the vaginal walls, and the blood some women find after they have sex for the first time usually wasn't from their hymen at all but from the walls of their vagina! Stress and fear during a woman's first time can cause her to clench her vaginal muscles so much that the walls of her vagina get scraped up from the friction and bleed a little! Bleeding during first intercourse does not necessarily indicate breaking of the hymen. The concept of “first bleed” could be caused by tense vaginal muscles, inadequate lubrication, rushed entry, or vaginal abrasions not related to hymenal tears. So make sure that you are relaxed, lubricated enough, fully aroused, and trust your partner to go slowly at first when you have your first time to avoid pain and bleeding!
The hymen changes during pregnancy!
We all know that hormone's in a pregnant woman's body cause many changes, well the hymen is no exception to this! The hymen gets thicker in preparation for birth! Though it does go back to normal after a while, just like a woman's breasts may shrink back to the size they were before pregnancy, after she is done breastfeeding.
“[The hymen] is composed mainly of elastic and collagenous connective tissue, and both outer and inner surfaces are covered by stratified epithelium… The edges of the torn tissue soon re-epithelialize. In pregnant women, the epithelium of the hymen is thick, and the tissue is rich in glycogen. Changes produced in the hymen by childbirth are usually readily recognizable.” Williams Obstetrics, p. 17
You can however, lose some of your hymen during birth or other extreme trauma to the area, it doesn't go away completely though and leaves behind what are called hymenal tags. Most women do make it through birth with their hymen intact and the most common cause of this permanent damage is due to Hymenotomy. This refers to the doctor having to make a small incision into the hymen in a difficult birth to reduce the damage caused by tearing and control the tearing. If this cut is done improperly a woman may be left with hymenal tags instead of a full hymen. It is difficult for giving birth to even badly damage / cause you to lose part of your hymen, which makes the "cherry popping" myth even more ridiculous.
"Hymenotomy refers to the cutting of hymenal tissue during birth. “The hymenal ring will usually tear during the first term birth. [You will often note a trickle of blood during crowning as this occurs (insert from page 474)]. As a rule, this happens easily, but occasionally the tissue is tough and resistant. Some practitioners find that snipping a tough hymen down to the center, flush with the yoni wall, will direct the tearing and prevent ragged skin tags with difficult-to-repair deviations." Healing Passage, Anne Frye, p. 253.
Some women are born without a hymen, and all hymens look different.
The top two examples on the right in this picture would require surgical intervention to correct, the rest are examples of a normal hymen taking on various shapes in various women! The hymen is quite fleshy and stretchy and all of these shapes would stretch out of the way during intercourse, and then return to the way they look in the pictures. As you can see it's not this mysterious hard to find or super thin membrane. When relaxed some may be jagged, some may be smooth, some may form a ring or a crescent shape and some may even form a line as you can see bottom right! These are all depictions of a relaxed hymen as nothing is being inserted, during sex, use of a tampon, or a sex toy the hymen should stretch comfortably to fit around whatever is being inserted. Some women can even be born without a hymen or with very little visible hymenal tissue, this is normal!
Fun informational videos! *
Conclusion: You can't use the hymen to "prove" virginity because some women are even born without one, every hymen is different, and please for the love of god ladies do not try to "break" your own hymen to avoid pain during your first time!! It will just heal anyway and you will have hurt yourself for no reason! Friction on the internal vaginal walls is what causes bleeding during first time intercourse, so make sure to be well lubricated and take it slow at first! May your first times be pain-free, blood free, safe, and fun!
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