Why Porn is Totally Screwing With the Heads of Men

Why Porn is Totally Screwing With the Heads of Men

Sadly, watching porn these days is about as common as going to the movies for young men. It's not only tolerated, it's expected and even encouraged by certain "experts" and other members of the community. But as many women will say, including those who have direct experience in such matters, porn is really, really messing with the heads of guys.

If you think porn is harmless, perhaps you should read this article. It's pretty explicit so if you're easily offended (or even squeamish), maybe it's a pass for you. But it's essential for most guys between the ages of 15 and 25, I think, and I'll guarantee that just about every woman will appreciate it. This isn't so much about giving men unrealistic expectations about themselves (the consequences being low self-esteem and anxiety about their sexual performance), but about completely false depictions of women.

Porn is highly stylized and directed; in other words, it's basically artificial. The higher level the pornstar(s), the more likely it is to be absurdly glossy, to the point of being so sheer it's comical. On top of which, there's that extreme focus on the women, and what they're supposedly enjoying. As an example, there's a mini story in that article from pornstar Jenna Jameson and frankly, it isn't pretty, and men should pay attention. Not that most men could actually do what that guy did (and I'm guessing that despite the story, many men want to), but Jenna's reaction to it should prove enlightening.

Why Porn is Totally Screwing With the Heads of Men

Right here on GaG, there's that Mia Rose interview, and she flat-out says people shouldn't watch porn, especially when they're younger. It screws up women and men, which results in legions of people who are so sexually dysfunctional that sex therapists and analysts are just getting richer. Porn has managed to eradicate the one element of sex that is most important: the human connection. It's all about being as close as possible to your partner, loving them and reading their reactions, knowing what they like and don't like, and experiencing pleasure together in the most intimate possible way. Porn is somehow the antithesis of that precept.

In general, the more people spend time removed from reality (i.e., sitting in front of a screen as opposed to real interaction), the more difficult it is for them to function in reality. So, when they're forced into the bright sunshine, they're hindered by whatever their brain has digested and processed and many times, that information is not only false, but dangerous. While claims of rape are of course at an all-time high, perhaps one of the reasons is because some porn depicts women who appear to enjoy pain or inordinately rough sex. It isn't hard to find porn where the woman starts by trying to resist the man but in the end, he basically just takes her and she loves it. Expecting that to happen in real life can - and should - lead to a rape accusation.

Why Porn is Totally Screwing With the Heads of Men

There are just so many reasons why an overindulgence in porn can be damaging to both men and women. But as the above article shows, porn is almost entirely about carnal desire and is incapable of showing how the mind is critical when it comes to sex, and why this act is supposed to be the epitome of closeness for two human beings. Sex is the ultimate perversion of that act, as it removes everything that's great and magical about lovemaking and focuses exclusively on that which is most disgusting. And in the process, humanity disappears and all we're left with is an illusion...but beneath that illusion is just a couple of grunting pigs in a sty.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • "The vast majority of women due to uncontrollable hypergamy are chasing top 20% of males (80/20) rule. This leave 80% of men to fight over 20% of remaining women. The result of this is we have an imbalance on the men side for available mates with many men in 80% only getting attention from women when they are post wall (over 30) after they've failed locking down an alpha."

    cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...e-8c22-0391141d0d0b.jpg

    However, men have sexual needs and are horny in their teens and 20's with their libido going down into their 30's and beyond where they start thinking more clearly and less with their dicks. Now, what is a young man suppose to do when he is not able to experience sex in their teen's and 20's because women don't want him and he is horny.

    Well the answer is simple, he turns to porn to satisfy his sexual needs. He get to see and vicariously live out the sex he would have liked with a girl he loved but never got because he was deem NOT GOOD ENOUGH by women.

    cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...d-b07c-5ca27880fd36.jpg

    Masturbating to porn is like a drug addiction and when you get accustom to jacking off to a certain type of female body for so many years it's kind of hard to not feel disappointing when you look at normal girls and see their bodies are very much under whelming and big contrast from female pornstars. Also many men over time need even more perverted sex acts to get off.

    cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...0-8556-b1277a93f63c.jpg

    cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...3-aa9d-2fae6654379a.jpg

    In addition, men use porn to fight off feeling alone. Being considered NOT GOOD ENOUGH and looked at like trash for so many years by the opposite gender can cause one to feel like shit, lead to psychological/mental damage and body dysmorphia issues. Many men use porn as an escape from reality and release.

    cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...1-a4a9-58777405e719.jpg

    The root cause here isn't porn but uncontrolled hypergamy on the woman's side and the discarding of men"

    • Utter BS from top to bottom, in my opinion.

    • Very interesting. Makes sense. And I love "Lord of The G-Strings". Seen it three times and wanna see it again. Some great music in it too.

    • @sovetskii13 One who believes one's failures are entirely the fault of others is destined to keep failing.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • "While claims of rape are of course at an all-time high, perhaps one of the reasons is because some porn depicts women who appear to enjoy pain or inordinately rough sex." <---- so wrong. There are tons of REAL women who enjoy rough sex or elements of pain, myself included. It's necessary for me and basically a guaranteed way to orgasm.

    Of course that doesn't mean all women are into it. People still have to use common sense and realize that everyone is different. That's why it's important to TALK to your partner and figure out what they like rather than assuming your partner will like something just because you saw it in a porno.

    Claiming that rough sex depictions in porn is a reason for an increase in rape claims makes no sense to me. There's a MAJOR difference between consensual rough/painful sex, and actual rape. Those two things should in no way be compared.

    I don't personally have an issue with porn. Pretty much everyone masturbates and porn gives a visual stimulant to help people with that. As long as it doesn't interfere with someone's every day life and they aren't addicted to it, then it's not really a problem. The important thing is to realize that porn is just a video and when you're interacting with your partner, communication is vital for a healthy sex life. No one should make assumptions about what their partner will like, it's important to talk about likes/dislikes beforehand.

    • I never had any partner to have sex with. I always had to pay for sex.

    • I have been with more than one woman who wanted to be tied up, tortured in ways that ranged from light play torture to serious pain and physical injury, then 'raped' while tied up.

    • @cth96190 That was the point of my opinion, many women like those things, but it's all still consensual, it's not actual rape.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Read the article. Everyone who watches porn should have to read that and understand the humiliation those people (especially women) go through to make it.

    • I worked behind the scenes in the porn industry for five years. All the females with whom I came into contact were enthusiastic volunteers, who did it for the sexual thrill/excitement, not the rather modest amount of money that was offered. We specialised in amateur couples. It was my job to put an advertisement in the newspaper, then spend the next two weeks interviewing single women and couples who wanted to do porn. I was kept busy, day and night, for those two weeks. You might be amazed by how many people (especially women) fantasise about doing a porno.

    • @cth96190 Nothing really surprises me, quite honestly, when it comes to sexuality. But I still see porn as immoral. But interesting perspective.

    • I have made porn, and I tell you that what a woman goes through is nothing compared to the men. Guys in porn are easily replaced, paid crap and ate treated worse. I was told "I've got a line of guys just waiting to take your place, shut up and do what you're told." So don't give me "especially women" that's absolutely BS. Female porn actresses make 10x what the guys do, and are treated with at least a little respect.

  • Seriously, Porn is like WWF Wrestling!! Everyone KNOWS it is fake!!! Porn is not reality!! It is meant to be FANTASY, to make some who like that get horny!
    It ISN'T REALITY!!! It isn't the Porn industry's fault, that some people are too stupid to realize it is FANTASY and NOT REALITY!!
    Do we need disclaimers, now, like on cigarettes?
    Warning: This movie is all fantasy, and if you do these things with your partner that you love, you are a total D-bag?
    Have some sense, people!!

  • I absolutly agree! Porn is creating unnatural affections in men and women. Men are constantly wanting more violent themed sex and there is constant pressure on women to appear as underage and sexually immature by having them shave/wax their pubic hair. Porn in general creats unrealistic expectations. People have forgotten how to actually make love. Its just about the mechanics of it now where a woman is an object to be used as they are used in porn. There is no love associated with it even though sex is supposed to be an expression of love and connection between two people who love and respect each other. It destroys sexuality, not enhance it.

  • ME: *wipes my hand on you*
    YOU: What did you just wipe on me?
    ME: My faith in humanity.

  • This might be the case for some but not for me. Both my man and I enjoy watching porn sometimes during sex. We still get that connection, we don't get insecure about not having their bodies. I'm secure enough to know my man loves my imperfect body. I watch it by myself when I play with myself too. It's a visual that turns me on.

  • Considring I even watched porn since I was 6 years old this just seem nuts to me. Its kinda the same like all the people who blame video games for causing violence, when if anything it makes people less violent. Which I think is pretty true for porn as well. Cause is kinda funny that pretty much all the countries where porn is pretty much banned and illegal are all the countries where women are treated like objects, where they are abused and seen as way less valuable than men and raped the most.

    I think guys and humanity in general works the complete opposite. Video games makes people less violent cause they get to live out their fantasies there, release aggresion that way. And guys for example get rid of their sexual frustration for example through porn. So they may even treat women better with more respect if dont feel so frustrated, which might make them more pushy and manipulative instead. All the biggest douchbags I known in life have never cared about porn. They are too busy "hunting" women. Using them.

    Even if I watched porn since I was 6 years, it has never given me any unrealistic standard or thoughts in reality that way. I treat everyone as an individual, dont base people on illusions or fantasies. I think only stupid or brainless people do that really, the same kind of people who can't separate video games from reality, cause im sure is a few of them, but far from majority. A tiny bit of common sense is enough. Which speaking of reality again. Certainly a compliment I gotten from everyone I been with as well, how respectful I been with them. So yeah I wouldn't say it dosent screw with the heads of anyone unless they are complete idiots.

    And for the record though, are obviously women who like rough, kinky, crazy sex, pain as well. Same with guys too. Some who even prefer "hate" sex. Whatever floats their boat.

  • Good myTake!

  • I guess most of this stuff is true. Unfortunately porn is the only sexual stimulation I can get and ever will. So, let porn mess with my mind because I will never need to know what sex or lovemaking really is.

  • I can tell you that, as a compsci student, I spend a good 10-12 hours a day in front of one of those computer screens that are "removing me from reality" and "impairing my ability to function in reality".
    Any time I spend watching pornography lasts about 10 minutes. Even if you were to argue that pornography was somehow a more powerful catalyst of this "dysfunction" you're describing, the exposure difference is not even close.
    Should we all be condemning programming?

    You sound like all those wackjobs that claimed that grand theft auto games were turning America's youth into sociopathic hardened criminals. Watching porn doesn't make people rape...

    • I read that article, figured I'd do you the favor of checking your sources since you apparently didn't bother. Here's a quote from an article by the same author that was "recommended" at the bottom of the page: However, punishing men does not move us toward this goal. In fact, in many ways it moves us further from it because as we villainize men who are far enough gone to actually commit crimes, we let off the hook those who contribute in smaller ways. My point was not to let rapists “off lightly” — it was to implicate all men. Or, nearly all men. Most men in American society profit from unpaid emotional labor from women. Until this is recognized, these sexual abuses of women will keep arising. And, as long as men keep seeing “the rapists” as a completely different beast from themselves, they will continue not to improve their own behavior. tl:dr: Your "author" believe that all men exist on a spectrum of "rapeyness" and that we're all jsut a few steps away from becoming monsters.

  • Porn is completely healthy its not my fault you date guys who think throat fucking and ass tearing anal and zero foreplay is normal!!! if u have a problem maybe you should date someone whos at your level

    I've watched gangbangs and bukkakes all the way down to Asian girls with tentacles its never hinder me once from having passionate sex and foreplay and being romantic?

  • ". . . porn is almost entirely about carnal desire and is incapable of showing how the mind is critical when it comes to sex, and why this act is supposed to be the epitome of closeness for two human beings. Sex is the ultimate perversion of that act, as it removes everything that's great and magical about lovemaking and focuses exclusively on that which is most disgusting."
    You write that "Sex is the ultimate perversion of that act [sex]. . . . So you're saying that sex is the ultimate perversion of sex. That makes no sense. You don't make the distinction with "lovemaking" until after saying sex is the ultimate perversion of sex. And then you really denigrate sex further by stating that it "focuses exclusively on that which is most disgusting." Why are you disgusted by sex?

    • Are you and @band47 friends?

  • I don't disagree with your overall message. But rates of rape aren't at "an all-time high". Like most other crime, rape has been steadily going down, even as porn consumption has gone up. Also, not all "porn" is the same. I'm not sure that erotica where love and tenderness are realistically depicted should be grouped together with perverted rape and gangbang porn. Arguments against porn only focus on the most depraved, extreme forms. They also focus on straight men watching it, while giving women, gay men and lesbians a free pass. If it's bad for one group, it's bad for everyone. It's not just young straight men who need to be lectured, as though they're the only ones with a problem.

  • Great take! Some guys really base high expectations on porns which is really not healthy at all whether they think or not.

    • Agreed. Women do the same thing though. I mean how many girls think 7 inches is average? The average is according to medical professionals 5.5 and most ranging from 5-6.5. How many girls say they want an 8+ inch penis... those are rare as fuck... i doubt most girls have had a legit 8 unless they sleep around a lot.

    • @Jamesol1 I agree with you as well. Some girls really do expect a lot. I don't have much knowledge on this so I can't say much about the sizes.

  • If someone has any kind of expectations based on porn, he's a brainless idiot. Porn hasn't been invented for expectations, but for enjoying to watch. Usually I forget what I see few moments after I close the browser. I know it's not real and I take it. It's also a reason why I would never ever judge someone's body or sex with someone just based on what I saw in porn. Porn is kinky fun for adults and I would say, leave it like that.

  • It may be true that porn messes up men's heads but men tend to watch porn because their woman either doesn't give them enough sex or the type of sex that they want. Most men are never going to stop watching porn because most women are never going to give them what they want so its a stalemate and its not going to change.

    • Perhaps if we respected them more and they weren't made to feel like an object or porn star themselves to compete with the porn, they would be wanting to make love more. When love is pulled from the equation, they don't want involvement, and rightfully so. Who wants to be treated as an object for someone elses pleasure only to realize that the person receiving all the pleasure doesn't even care about them or love them?

    • @James1986 Oh great. What are you a male feminist or something? Do you understand that due to our biology men have higher testosterone levels and therefore higher levels of interest in sex? Do you know that men have evolved to pro-create with as many women as possible and that women have evolved to pro-create with few men so that they can have the time to nurture their babies? That it is how the human race managed to survive and evolve over time. I'm always amazed at guys like you who always take the women's side. I'm not taking the women or men's side. I'm simply saying our levels of interest in sex are different due to our biology and that will never change. People can theorize and pretend we are both the same but we are not and never will be. Thats just how life is.

    • I'm not a feminist sympathizer. I can't stand that crowd. I actually agree with what you are saying. People make fun of the ages old practice of polygamy but you are correct. Men are naturally meant to be with multiple partners. Its in our drive and its strong. I don't disagree with anything in your last post. All I'm saying is that I have been around long enough to not be stupid. Women function in a way in which they need the connection and don't want to feel non human, like an object. If you can acomplish that, you will probably get more sex than you can handle. If not, then she has some serious issues she needs to address and should seek some help.

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  • If there are so many women agreeing with this they ought to stop fucking emotionally and intellectually stunted boys.

  • Pornography is a masturbation aid. Nothing more, nothing less.
    Religious nutters oppose pornography because it allows people (especially men) to achieve sexual release, which makes them less receptive to the mind control of the churches.
    The three Abrahamic religions that slithered out of the deserts of the Middle East stigmatise sex as a way to create guilt/sin, which, in turn, requires forgiveness from their vengeful and sexually neurotic gods. In terms of a way to exercise mind control over a mass of people, it is genius.
    Some women oppose pornography because it allows men to achieve sexual release without the involvement of a female. This reduces the sexual market value of all women and, consequently, the ability of women to use their sexuality to manipulate men.
    I have not touched a woman for 15 years and have no interest in doing so. Release is a mouse click away. . . and it will not take my house, my retirement savings, my investment portfolio, demand child support, or make a false rape allegation.
    All things considered, pornography is a rather attractive alternative to the real thing.

    • How sad of an outlook.

    • @James1986 Sad? Perhaps, but it is also realistic, based on what I have experienced and observed. You might come to agree with me, after you have been arse raped by a divorce court and sentenced to a life of poverty via a child-support order. In some jurisdictions, you can be ordered to pay child support for the bastard offspring of the woman's adulterous affairs, or children she had already before she met you.

    • Well I would agree that paying for everyone elses children isn't right ether. Nor is paying an unreasonable sum and losing everything you have worked hard for. But surly you agree that all women are not like this. There are some women who really are sweet and would probably be hurt by the man in their life long before she would ever do anything back which then throws an imbalance the other direction. When I said I am sad, I meant I am sad for you that you would deny across the board everyone because of one. Love is beautiful when its with the right person. Sometimes we have to be with the wrong people before we can identify the right people in life. Ether way, porn will only make it worse. It is not fulfilling even though it may seem that way in the moment. It will lead to a buildup of ever increasing sexual frustration over time.

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  • This article is cringe worthy.

  • Pretty good - liked it.
    And I agree. She better be having huge O's or you're doing it wrong.

    My wife said her former boyfriend never wanted her to orgasm so she would 'want it more'. Hmmm... right.

    Always let her come first, unless it's just YOUR session. They will do that too if you treat them right.

  • People watch porn to get their rocks off. Only on this site do people are dumb enough to actually think that porn is reality and feel the need to tell people about it 😑

    • *... Site are people dumb enough...

    • Lol its just not people on this site it's people off b it too. You know how some people are so stupid irl 😂

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