What is the psychology behind fetishes? Is there reason for concern?

[regular-guy]

There are a lot of fetish questions here. Is anybody aware of the psychology behind fetishes? I know most fetishes are socially unacceptable and stigmatized, but are they associated with any dangerous behaviors? Are they linked to particular personality disorders or traits? Are they the result of traumatic experiences or social conditioning?

[Anonymous]

i agree with shelei...it depends on your childhood and experiences...and usually its about what you lack that makes you obsessed with something...

for example, I recently found out that after Michael Jackson's death, people felt horrible for accusing him as a pedaphile...but I think what really happened was that since Michael didn't have a real childhood, he would cry because he had to work and record songs instead of being with the kids at the park playing, he lacked the happiness and fun that comes with being a kid, and his dad abused him too as a kid making him work and become famous...so he grew up to love children too much, he wanted to fulfill his lack of a childhood by playing with them and enjoying innocent times...which mislead everyone to think he was a pedaphile...

i don't think he was, he was a great dad and family guy! awesome person RIP!

but in other cases...fetishes can be dangerous...

some are innocent depending on what degree you take them too..like if you're attracted to a certain feature the opposite sex has..and it makes you weak for them...then that's okay no one is getting hurt...and its great to be attractive! this one guy told me I have baby soft skin, and I took it as a compliment because he didn't freak me out or anything...he just had a crush on me and stuff totally innocent and cute

i heard legs are another popular one...and feet too (which I don't get the meaning behind)

oh and I remember reading Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck, and Lenni's obsession for soft-feel objects...now that is the perfect example of a dangerous fetish.

[Anonymous]

I don't know about the underlying psychology, but it seems like fetishists are obsessive and sometimes compulsive. For me a fetish is when something moves beyond just an interest or an attractive feature for a person, they become obsessed with it, overly interested, and for some odd reason sexually aroused. If I had to make an uneducated guess, I would think it fits in somewhere with addictive and obsessive tendencies. There may be some crossed wiring or some form of social conditioning that has gone on as well.

I mean, I like nice abs, chest and shoulders, and a tight butt, but I don't go around seeking out extra opportunities to see those things, and when I do see them I recognize them as attractive but it doesn't trip all my erotic triggers. I have seen websites dedicated to feet, pantyhose, BDSM, female muscle women, etc. I have also witnessed guys trolling social webcasting and chat sites asking girls to take off their socks and show their feet. Of course there are guys who do the same asking them to take off their shirts and show their boobs...in both cases you seem to have perverse voyeuristic activities, but the fetishists seem to take things to a whole new level.

[Cool-Relax]

Fetishism is a type of paraphilia. Paraphilias involve sexual arousal from inappropriate people and/or objects. There are often multiple paraphilic patterns of arousal, and there tends to be high comorbidity with other psychological disorders (i.e. people with fetishes tend to have other disorders).

The main types of paraphilias are voyeurism, exhibitionism, fetishism, transvestic fetishism, sexual sadism and masochism, and pedophilia. I would definitely say some of those behaviors are dangerous; some of them are even illegal.

As far as the causes of paraphilias go, they're associated with sexual and social problems and deficits. Inappropriate arousal/fantasies are generally learned early in life. And there's a connection between a high sex drive, and a suppression of urges/drive.

That's all from my psych notes.

Also, I don't think there's any direct link between paraphilias and personality disorders.

[WeaponZero]

So what you're saying is that trying to suppress these urges leads to the problem getting worse and development of paraphilias?

[Cool-Relax]

Assuming my professor's not an idiot, yep, that's correct.

[regular-guy]

Wow! This was exactly what I was hoping for. I appreciate the personal insights from everyone, but this more or less state of the art helps explain a lot. You say people with fetishes tend to have other disorders, but not personality disorders. What disorders do they have then?

[Cool-Relax]

Well, I just spent a fair amount of time researching it, and I can't find a particular disorder connected to paraphilias. I do keep coming across one thing though: In most cases, the individual with a paraphilia has difficulty developing personal and sexual relationships with others. There are a lot of disorders out there, and a lot that involve impaired social functioning. That's the best I can tell you.

[l-hedoniste]

The most sensible available hypothesis is that fetishes are ways of discharging anxiety about power relationships by eroticising them. Adoration, submission, masochism, impulses that could be anxiety-producing or inappropriate in most social contexts, can become fulfilling in an erotic context.

No consistent association has been made between fetishism and antisocial behavior, personality disorders, conditioning, or trauma. Anxiety is still arises from social ostracism and stigma, but this is to be expected; you stigmatize and ostracize those whose spirits you wish to wound.

[p-guy]

I think you are born pre-disposed to certain activities and fetishes are really no different than things like not eating beef. Take for example girls, what makes some girls "girly girls" and others "tomboys". Do you think they planned it that way, no their personalities pre-disposed them to that behavior. Fetishes are the same thing, its just that we label them because they have this social stigmatization as you say.

[Shlei3]

So someone who has a fetish for some hard core S & M...it's their personality and there is nothing they can do about it?

[jacquesvol]

I don't believe much in "predispositions" , but it's quite possible that people don't have insight in their own motivations.(or errors their parents made in their education) The old "Chaos theory"( a butteries' wings in the Brasilian forest can cause a storm in Alaska -Lorentz.: every thing that happens has a causal tie to precedent happenings/circumstances but these precedent happening/circumstances are too multiple and complicated for most people (even scientists) to be perceived as the cause.

[jacquesvol]

I believe we should consider fetishes in function of what harm they do to others, not in function of the desires of the fetishist.

[p-guy]

Shlei: I am not saying there is nothing they can do about it. I think it is an urge or a compulsion that you must keep under control. Some people are better at controlling their obsession than others. It's really no different than an alcoholic or drug addict, except you have an addiction to the behavior or some object.

[Shlei3]

People don't always want to control their fetishes and it becomes an obsession. And that is where it makes them dangerous.

[p-guy]

I agree Shlei, but I was speaking to your comment that "there is nothing they can do about it". That statement implies a wish to do something about it. People that do not try to control their fetishes may very easily create obsessions that can be dangerous to themselves and others. I stand by my statement that its no different than alcoholism or drug addiction.

[regular-guy]

I agree that there is certainly an addictive component to fetishism.

[hmhmmcaitlin]

I think fetishes are developed through experiences in childhood. Another possibility is that the fetishes represent what someone really wants. For example, I'm a lonely person and depressed quite often. I have a bit of a fetish for over powering men and bondage. I think this is because I need someone who's stronger then me to support me. So the want for a strong man also translate into my sexual preferences.

[Shlei3]

Fetishes can become dangerous (they are not always) if the fetish escalates to a level that can harm another person. For example: Ted Bundy couldn't get his rocks off unless the girl he was with was playing dead. This escalated into him murdering girls and then having sex with them. This is a fetish that got out of hand. There are some S & M fetishes that can get out of hand for example the practice of tying your genitals up as well as cutting off your air supply so the orgasm is much more intense can be dangerous.

The fetish of people harming cats has often been suggestive to the person having some lack of emotions and humanity. Reading psychological profiles that indicate this (i.e. skinned dogs, shot cats etc) indicate that they think this is a problem in the person's mental stability.

[Shlei3]

Fetishes are a reflection of a person's mentality and/or past. For example; it is common for a person who has expressed a fetish for abusing younger kids to have been abused themselves.

[jacquesvol]

"Fetishes can become dangerous" indeed (they are not always) the feeling of the partner makes the difference, even concerning non-dangerous fetishes: what if the girl finds the fetish boring? Or worse, if she finds it humiliating?

[jacquesvol]

"a fetish for abusing younger kids" is more than "just a fetish", it's a behavior that endangers persons incapable to consent because of their age. Criminal offense thus.

[p-guy]

Jacquesvol, I think you are full of sh....t, Pedophilia may be a type of fetish, but it is not all fetishes.. Fetishes are typically described as a compulsive attraction or obsession with a behavior or object. Sure Fetishes can become dangerous, but so can Driving a car. As I said below, there is still a level of self control. I don't really believe that harming cats, and pedophilia and serial killing are "fetish" behaviors, they are psychopathic behavior.

[bertftw]

Pedophilia is not a fetish its a paraphilia; there's a big difference. Fetishism is the fixation on an inanimate object or body part that is not primarily sexual in nature, and the compulsive need for its use in order to obtain sexual gratification. Kids are people not inanimate objects. Animals are not inanimate objects and usually they don't masturbate or ejaculate to the killing of animals. It's usually just the feeling of having the power to take a life. Therefore psychopathic behavior

[gotc147]

While fetishes can be related to a persons past or something along those lines. However you can't dismiss that some fetishes (mostly sexual ones) are had simply because of a want (or in some cases, need) for an extra thrill, and extra spark if you will. It is simply viewed as a fetish because nobody else really understands the fascination behind a particular way of getting that extra spark.