I caught my sister! Why is she having sex?!?!?!

my sister is only 12 years old, why on earth is she having sex? and why is my dad letting her? I think that is HORRIBLY TOO YOUNG! but my dad is letting her... mom isn't in the picture at the moment. our parents are going threw a divorce rite now but my sister seemed to be handling it the best. is this some sort of breakdown for her? she I even talk to her about it? wen I went to ask her what she was doing all she responded with was " I'm old enough to make my own decisions, and you don't need to know what I do"
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Most Helpful Girls

  • first off, what do you mean by your dad is letting her? as in he knows and is not doing anything about it?

    second, no she is not old enough to make her own decisions. and you NEED to make sure she knows that. yes, she has the right to have her secrets and personal info. everyone does. but this could be life changing for her. she shouldn't be getting herself into this just yet. and now you know about it so don't ignore it.

    being able to make your own decisions involves the person realizing their actions and effects of said actions, good and bad. and is willing to fully understand them. which she is not. she does not truly understand that she could get pregnant and hurt. she is a kid. not even a full teenager yet. I know that around that time is when kids her age really start getting into talking about all the things people can do sexually. because if I recall, I think I was in like 7th grade when I was 12? junior high nonetheless. and that's when you become surrounded with that topic, I definitely remember that. but still.

    going through a divorce at the moment? that could very well be something that is pushing her to have sex right now. whether she was already doing it before the divorce was announced or not, I assume your parents had a lot of trouble and arguments and fights already. and a lot of times if someone, especially a girl, doesn't feel they can have a steady reliable relationship with the parents and mainly dad, then she may end up in a desperate search for it elsewhere. in other guys.

    and if your dad is letting her have sex with these guys, no offense to your dad, but that is saying something about him. he doesn't seem that involved in your sisters life. which could be another reason.

    yeah I'm thinking it may be her way of dealing and getting comfort and feeling loved and wanted. because divorce tends to make you blame yourself and feel alone. not all the time. but it happens. her private way. because you said she seemed to be handling it the best?

    talk to your sister. don't leave her alone with this. and don't let it go. try your best to get your parents to see what's happening. I wish you didn't have to handle her alone. just be there for her. but also, try not to make her feel like you judge her.

    good luck hun

  • Look if her parents aren't in the picture for her now and are having their own problems, I think you should talk to her and know the reason why she is doing that from her not from people here because she's the only one who knows the reason behind what she is doing. Don't leave your sister like that because no she's not old enough to make her own decisions and many youngsters are starting this these days and someone has to stop her, and right now that someone is you. Be her older sister and stand up for the right and wrong what she is doing even if you have to be harsh on her, remember its in her best interest in the end. Gl, and hope you make the right decision, Maggie.

  • wow I'm sorry you had to see that, your sister probably feels the need of a guy being close to her so she can feel wanted or comfort. I listen to loveline a lot lol so I'm gonna have to say this is some type of psychological thing, like trauma etc.. she is WAY to young and you have to tell an adult right away you def don't want your 12 year old sister pregnant! you have to ask her 'are you using a condom and are on birth control? if not you can get pregnant' you have to scare her into waiting for sex, she's just a baby herself

Most Helpful Guys

  • its really embarrassing moment, I'm sorry for you , but c is not old enough, for this let her stop by as you can if c is at her age then it was a point to think, but c isn't too young rite now!

  • That guy simply is ABUSING HER. Read the Law

    You or your mother and father should intervene to protect her. Where is your mum in this? A divorce is no excuse to neglect a child.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • 12 is way to young you are really still a child and I hardly even knew what sex was at that age. I get the feeling that she's having sex to cover up her problems some way and to make her feel better about stuff like your parents divorce. You should tell her that she is not old enough to make her own decisions and that she needs to be 18 to do that and until then she's needs to listen to an adult.

  • Wow. Uhm, when I was 12, I barely even knew what sex was. I'm 14, almost 15 now, & I really have no desire to rush into sex. I mean, of course I've thought about it, but the thought really scares me. If I were in that situation, I'd definitely talk to her about it. Even I'm too young for sex.

    • I agree with you there about sex. Like we can't even pleasure ourselves cause we were told it's bad. But do u think that is bad as well

  • its nature...every living animal on earth is driven to have sex ...its only nature

  • how old is the guy? either way 12 is way too young, I just hope the boy is her age otherwise you need to intervene. It's way too young to even be doing anything sexually related, I'm surprised she even has a sex drive that young.

    • I have no idea how many times she's done it, but I do no they guy she was with. and he's almost 16. and I do know she started having her period about 3 months ago... lol long story.... maybe that could have something to do with the sex drive

    • That guy simply is ABUSING HER. You or your mother and father should intervene to protect her. Where is your mum in this? Indeed, getting her periods can cause sex drive.

  • id would say 12 is way too young but she sounds more mature than you so let her enjoy it

  • Yes, you should talk to her about it. You are right she is way too young. She isn't old enough to make her own decisions. She is still a little girl. Try to have another chat with her. If that doesn't work I would try talking to the boy's parents. Good luck

  • She was doing that I'm sure before the divorce, has nothing to do with it. What can you do right? She's gonna do what she wants and in her mind she thinks cause its her life she can make that kind of decision without worrying about the consequences. Hard-headed is what you call that. So all you can do is talk to her about it. You would have done your part by caring but really she's gonna do it still no matter what you and your parents do.