Why Is Virginity Important?

First off,i am 16 years old and a virgin.But I've always wondered,why is virginity important.Here's my thought,or opinion,everyone is born a virgin,virginity isn't something to be proud of or ashamed of because it isn't an accomplishment,it's just a natural part of life.Being a virgin doesn't make someone a better person,just as having sex doesn't make someone a better person.And in my personal experience,although I am a virgin,i notice some virgins[not all] have this "holier than thou" mentality,as though they are better than those who have had sex.I don't look down on people who have sex,i say as long as you're educated about safe sex,use protection and understand the consequences,then go right on ahead,of course there are certain circumstances that don't include what I'm saying.I'm not trying to push my views on other people,if that's what it sounds like,nor am I judging others for their sex lives or virginity,as I am one.I understand everyone has different views on sex,virginity and premarital sex,but I'm just wondering,why is virginity so important?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • A good question, well thought out and well written. I hope I can give you a worthy answer.

    In my opinion, it is not important. It is merely an individuals choice and that choice should be kept too oneself, not broadcast too the world. You are exactly right about the " "holier than thou" attitude many individuals display. Perhaps it is a way they can feel superior. Many people have self image problems and derive some satisfaction from feeling themselves superior too others.

    The origins of this myth are bifurcated by economics and religion. Priests were supposed to remain celibate and if they couldn't have any, they didn't want others to get any either. As they rose through the hierarchy of the church they eventually arrived at the level of making the religious rules and so they ordered no sex unless you are married. Some of the real Zealots went for no sex except for the purpose of trying to get pregnant. Probably the modern day prize winners would be the Shakers. They dictated no sex ever for any reason; which probably explains why the group eventually became extinct .

    The other reason is economics. It used to be that finding enough food was the major effort of mankind. We used to devote most of our effort just too producing enough food to survive. When you think about that you can easily understand why parents would be opposed to their daughters bringing home unwanted additional mouths to feed. In order to prevent pregnancy these parents fed their daughters all manner of propaganda with the intent of making them believe sex was a bad thing, that virginity was something to be cherished. They were in fact very successful as the attitude still exists today and modern day parents are still feeding daughters the same propaganda without even knowing why they are doing it. You see they are just parroting parental techniques they were exposed too as children.

    This will also give you an understanding of why it is that female virginity is such a treasure, but no significance is attached to male virginity. You see the sons never come home pregnant so no brain washing of the males was needed. In fact male promiscuity is sometimes applauded, the "stud".

    There are significant benefits too being a virgin and also significant drawbacks, just as there are both with benefits and drawbacks to being sexually active. In the end, sex should be delayed until the participant is able to deal with the ramifications in a responsible manner. One needs to be well informed on birth control, disease prevention, be emotionally stable and be able to financially and emotionally deal with the results.

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    • MAINTAINING virginity despite crazy hormones IS an accomplishment. Falling into fornication is NOT an accomplishment

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    • Are you kidding buddy? Anyone can choose not to have sex despite their raging hormones. Easy task. We choose to have sex because we want to.

    • There's a practial reason to it also.
      It's a bit important if you live in a small town and are bound to meet that first guy/girl every other day when shopping or daily on the job, even after both of you married another person: that could be a bit delicate given the fact that our education isn't able to cope with sexuality.
      In a big city or when you move out of town that isn't likely to happen.

What Guys Said 18

  • Well said!

    "wondering,why is virginity so important?"

    A belief stemming from history when

    -childbirth could cause death

    -even a minor ilness could cause death.

    It also was a question of money:

    -it was important to keep the family fortune in the family through arranged marriages. To expand the family fortune through marriage.

    -for lots of girls it was the only "quality" they could offer since education and schooling for girls were nearly non-existent.

    A girl had to be worth the dowry and lots of girls couldn't offer much. Non virgins brought a smaller dowry.

    Who thinks about a dowry in 2010?

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  • Virginity is one of those things someone can boast about without having to do any physical or mental effort to get it: "merit" free for all.

    Of course, getting a degree is more difficult.

    Basically, virginity is just a word to describe the period in ones' life before he/she had intercourse or the first time. Nothing more.

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  • You're absolutely right. Too bad more don't turn out like you.

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  • There's the rift between people who think casual sex is okay and the people who think that sex is something that's special and not to be taken lightly. Those two differing opinions mean that there's gonna be a lot of conflict. The casual sex side has stated what they think pretty well, but for the other side (I have mixed feeling on the issue) they see sex as something more than primal nature. They sort of see someone who just gave it up to any him/her out of curiosity or to get sex off their to do list as someone who just threw away something you only get to experience once, and think that the first time should be remembered fondly, not as something you did with someone you didn't really think was special. I myself, think the first time should be special, but by special, I mean you should feel strongly for the other person, but you don't have to want to marry them, but definitely feel more than just physical attraction. Of course sex is a big thing, but it's really primal too, and perfectly natural for people to want it.

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  • >Here's my thought,or opinion,everyone is born a virgin,virginity isn't something to be proud of or ashamed of because it isn't an accomplishment,it's just a natural part of life.

    I think this is one of the smartest things I've read on here. 5 stars!

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What Girls Said 18

  • it's important because in a way it is influenced by male preference

    if a guy truly loved a girl, he'll take her even if she isn't a virgin because what matters is inside, not the physical characteristics of a person..through age, your appearance and other physical aspects deteriorate.

    in terms of some religions, cultures, they value virginity

    but it seems shallow to soley base mate selection on just whether or not a person is virgin or not

    and if you're concerned, make sure you don't give it to some random guy if you hold it as something valuable to you

    it is what you remember for the rest of your life.

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  • i think its important because in my opinion sex is something to save for marriage. I see no point in giving up the most sacred part of you to someone unless you know your going to spend the rest of your life with them. and don't you want to be the first and only person your spouse has sex with?

    And I completely agree with how some virgins think there better, but its not our place to judge them on their choices, its something they gave up so why should we care its a choice they made, not something that effects us.

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  • I was wondering the same thing.

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  • your virginity is something that you only have of to give. I'm Catholic so the religious aspect comes into it for me. but aside from that I don't want to just give mine away to just anyone. to me sex should be a sign of love and there's not greater love than someone saying that they want to spend the rest of their lives with you. these reasons combined is why I'm saving myself for marriage..

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  • For me, virginity is a gift that you can only give once. It's the gift of yourself.

    And I want to share that with the man who loves me enough to commit to spending his whole life with wacky old me.

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