Why do guys lie about jerking off?

[Bunni26]

My boyfriend used to watch porn all the time, pictures, Internet, dirty magazines, go to strip clubs, before I started going out with him. I then learned he was a virgin before me, and didn't admit it till 6 months later (he lied about being a virgin!) And at beginning of our relationship, he said he never masturbated, and then I found out he was lying. He said he was too ashamed to admit it. I'm like what's the big deal?! I also tapped into his bank accounts and found out he was still buying porn from adult bookstores (he had spent hundreds a month on it before) on two occasions. This was a while ago, and I even caught him looking at porn on my computer. (he denies it until caught red handed) ever since I caught him so long ago, he swears up and down that he does not do it, But the thing is, I don't mind or care if he does, I think its healthy, what bothers me is that I know he has to be lying and is hiding such an obvious human thing. . If he would just not be ashamed of himself and just admit it, I would feel a lot better ! I haven't had sex with him in a month, and he can not admit to doing in even once since he got caught a year and a half ago What should I do? also he is a J/W and they are really modest people. I think his idea is that I could never know if I am not with him

[skurge65]

I've found that people only tell their truths to those who can handle them. Then there is a closeness because of acceptance. Since I've realized this I've tried to be more accepting and understanding since I want the truth. People want to tell the truth but also want you to think highly of them too. I think that's why girls can actually be closer to other girls even over their special guy.

He was a virgin, I assume to a ripe ole age of 20 plus? That's so shameful to most men. They feel ashamed that no one wants them. They feel a girl would be insulted to find out that they are with someone no one else wants. I think people turn to porn to begin with because we think no one attractive wants us.Your boyfriend may actually now be addicted to porn and thinks no one including you can accept that so he will lie.

So, try to accept his dark side. It is a difficult side in each of us that is difficult for others to accept. Here's the catch. If you only ACT accepting of him, he opens up to you, and later you use that against him then he may never ever open up to you again.

[Bunni26]

Wow, Thank you all and Skurge what a detailed answer, I totally agree, Actually it's much worse, he's in his early 30s! So, of course he hid his virginity from me. But its partially because of his very modest relgion (jehovah's witness) and only girls he's dated in past, just a handul, were j/w and just didn't have sex unless married. He no doubt was addicted to porn in past, when he was very lonely, I know he can't afford to buy it now, has to share a computer, Even if ever does randomly once a

[germanotaku]

Well most of the time it is because we think that the girl might get envious on the girl we do masturbate to...

We're afraid that they might ask himself "What do these girls have that I don't?", stuff like that... Even though I know it's more than normal to do it, (I'm 23 and virgin... so...), I wouldn't really honestly answer on how often I do it xD Don't really know why, it's just the way it is.

Guess our thinking just goes "we do it way more often than girls, so we need to lie so that it might come out the same" - even if we don't actually know how often girls do it. (and of course it differs from girl to girl, too, I think... xD)

Well, that's as much insight as I'm able to give xD

[Dallsimo]

Its not because he lied to you that all men do! Personally, my girlfriend knows that i jerkoff watching pics / vidz of ourselves!

[Anonymous]

almost everybody does it and they feel pathetic doing it and in society everyone's a hypocrite on this