Need advice on confusing wet dream and its effects on me!

Question

Hi, I'm 16 and I really need some advice on this, so if someone could please say something useful about this, it’d be a great help for me...It started when I accidentally saw my mom undressing. She was stepping out of her jeans and revealing her butt in only a skimpy THONG and bending over right in front of me! I was like EEWW, but it was weird, cause usually I find thongs the sexiest thing on earth, and i’ve always fantasized about exactly that image I saw now. If it hadn’t been my mother, I would have sexually exploded right there! It was horrible for me.The following night I had a dream: I walked into the kitchen, where I saw my mom. She had her back turned to me and was bent over the table. She was wearing a small t-shirt and the same skimpy thong again. She was stretching her butt out in that thong, and I was very aroused seeing this. I knelt down right behind her and grabbed her cheeks, one with each hand. Then I started rubbing my face against them, and in the end I had my nose and mouth buried between her cheeks, right where the string of her thong was. My mom completely ignored me the whole time and was reading a newspaper, as if I wasn’t there and as if she didn’t notice someone was even touching her. That's when I woke up and reaized it. But I was already over the edge and still half sleeping, so I just let go and enjoyed the very pleasuring ejaculation that followed, while I was still continuing the same dream in my mind!I tried to forget about the whole thing, but when I saw my mom sitting in front of me, with her thong sticking out of her jeans and revealing half of her cheeks, and I caught myself staring at it and WILLFULLY enjoying it and getting aroused and erected!And now the worst...last time I was masturbating, right before I was cumming, the picture of my mom stepping out of her jeans and bending over in the thong popped into my mind, and I kept it there as I was cumming!Is this just a phase?

da5id · Accepted Answer

the question if this is a phase or not largely depends on what happens from now on.

this is not an oedipus-complex per se yet, it is more like this: link

it was an experiment where a guy named pavlov trained a dog to start saliva-production when hearing a bell.

so what he did was: at first he rang the bell, and the dog behaved normally, just like you behaved normally (or lets say unconditioned) to your mother, then he put a bowl with food infront of the dog (thongs for you), and it startet dripping saliva out of his mouth, obviously because it was expecting to eat soon (no need to explain).

then he connected those two by putting them side by side and after a few repetitions the dog started producing the moment it heard the bell, because of the association in its head.

now I don't know if this is still totally up to date knowledge, but that is the pavlovian conditioning.

it also works with fears, experiencing a horrible car-crash at an intersection and becoming hysteric when getting close to that intersection again etc.

the reason is thought to be because of the way our brain stores information, because, other than we might think, it doesn't do it "intelligently" but by using emotions as markers.

thats also why certain emotions suddenly make you remember certain memories or why certain memories make us feel certain emotions again.

actors do it to cry voluntarily.

its also part of why songs for example carry a lot of "meaning".

i would also think that the reason this particular thing is so strong for you is because it combines something socially unacceptable with something sexually arousing, you feel guilt, but also excitement, and because it is the strongest sexual experience you had so far, it is the first that comes to mind.

in case you want to discontinue this:

you have to do something counter-intuitive: think of your mother as just a normal woman (which she is by the way)

accept that what you fantasized about is something normal, even though not all may experience it while growing up.

look for more sexual input, make this scene one of many, maybe you find something even more to your liking, now I won't give you links to porn sites because you are not yet 18 :P, but they are one option of many, girlfriends, magazines, internet-chat, etc.

you may be a bit young but hey, anyone who still remembers being that age knows that we all started at 13-16 right?

there should also be a certified psychologist at your school, that you can ask for advice and talk to, avoid mentioning it to classmates, and your teachers but I guess I don't really have to tell you that.

whats MOST IMPORTANT however:

be open and honest with yourself AND with people that are 100% trustworthy.

best of luck

bersaba · Accepted Answer

1: Yes, it's just a phase

2: To answer your last part first, when you are orgasming (in this case, from masturbating). You hit a 'point of no return' where, no matter what happens, you can't go back. You could think of your grandma in leotards at that point and you're still going to cum.

3: Now, about your mum:

a) Given that you're both masturbating AND having wet dreams, you're clearly at that point in your teen years where you'll be wanking / orgasming about 10 times a day. We've all been there, it's both great and annoying.

b) The reason for your dream about your mum is, well, she's there. Your hormones are so pumped that anything sexual is a 'release'. Unfortunately for you, you saw your mum.

c) The fact that you have previously liked thongs, you saw that, and your first reaction was your habitual (thong = hot).

It's not really that it's your 'mum' that's turning you on, it's just a physical representation of what you always liked, which was a thong and ass. This problem happens to many young guys, often with their mother or sister becoming their first 'reality'. Don't feel to bad.

How to 'fix' it.

Option 1: Start on a different fantasy. You need to find something else to masturbate about that's not thong / anal. It doesn't matter what it is, but find something 'fresh' and use that. If you drop off the 'thong' fantasy, your mother should go with it.

Option 2: Try and imagine someone 'socially acceptable' in a thong. (Say a girl you like at school, or a hot school teacher). If you can move your thong fantasy to them instead, again, your mother should go with it.

Option 3: Cognitive behavioural therapy. This is 'retraining' the brain and you need to retrain your mother as something non sexual. If you find yourself fantasising about her whilst masturbating, stop and think about her in a disgusting / non sexual environment. (Like, I dunno, cleaning out a pig sty). This is not easy.

Option 4: Flow with it. I would NOT recommend this, but if you think you're emotionally capable of divorcing reality from fantasy and don't think it'll mess with your head, than just go with the flow and you should outgrow the phase in your own time.

blaubeca · Accepted Answer

I think you just saw something that was sexually stimulating and have become TEMPORARILY preoccupied with it. Everyone become temporarily fascinated with some image or person and then the excitation and fascination goes away. Then you become preoccupied with a different image or person. You already said that you normally find a thong very sexy, so the fact that it is your mother in the thong isn't so unusual.

When you are not dreaming, however, I would definitely steer clear of your mom's behind. Don't look at it, don't think about it, and don't get aroused by it!

You should go look at some porn or something and get aroused by that, so the image of your mom will be replaced.

Annia · Accepted Answer

We were studying instances such as this in my Introductory Psychology class. I'm not a doctor but it sounds like you have symptoms of the Oedipus Complex. With it, a group of largely unconscious (dynamically repressed) ideas and feelings which center around the desire to possess the parent of the opposite sex This is typical of boys age three to five but there have been belated occurrences. This is just a phase and will eventually fade away with time. Not to worry. :)

In case you didn't know, Oedipus is a Greek mythical character who kills his father and marries his mother (Unknowingly of course).

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I don't think its something you should intentionally think about by any means, she is your mother, but don't beat yourself up. If I'm reading this correctly, you're not getting off in any way because of who the girl is lol It's just an image of a girl's butt in a thong. All guys can find that hot. I would recommend watching some mind blowing porn or something so you can start fantasizing about that instead.

rdabby · Answer

I believe its just a phase, replace the image of something else, check out porn, check out other chicks and other stuff that might turn you on and if your mom pops in your head again just try to control it and not think about her.

katiesmuff · Answer

Sounds like you are having a great time in dreamland.

kittycat29 · Answer

it appears like an oedipus complex, but on closer inspection I believe it's a phase. it does happen occasionally to men. Alternatively and a more direct interpretation of the dream, may be your libido's way of telling you that it's been too long since you have had sex. It may also indicate repressed sexual desires and your needs for physical and emotional love, not from your mother, but from a better half (like a girlfriend). I think personally, you're mind is telling you that you want a relationship and that it's ready for either that, OR for a lot a LOT of sex. :D

hockeypro · Answer

thats hot moms wearing jeans damm is she a milf? because I know people who have had sex with their mom and the relationship was really good. and if it is just the thongs that make you horny then when you mom is not looking take the thongs from her dresser and jack off with them. good luck buddy

swagger · Answer

Dude. ... Your getting aroused by your Mum! That is not good. Try to check out your friends Mums Thongs and replace that image. However thanks for the images of your mum bending over in her thong.

Dan2287 · Answer

I wouldn't worry about it too much. It will pass eventually. Next time your masturbating, print off some porn from the internet and focus on that :P

effrubberduckies · Answer

Its normal to fantasize about authority figures. It being your mom will probably change into a teacher or something of that sort..

drakal76 · Answer

I think it's justa  phase. It does happen to the best of us sometimes. Just do as other have suggested and re-direct your mind in another place. I'm sure there are many more girls your age that you could think about.

poulette12 · Answer

It sounds like it's just a phase ( I hope) Try to distract yourself by looking at other women ( porn, magazines, whatever really). I don't wanna bit harsh with you because it's not like you want this.

Porter21 · Answer

Maybe? If you mom is hot I would probably feel same way! At 16 you have a lot of hormones going on! You also going through puberty you are probably very horny at your age! I know I was like you at 16 I was always getting hard one’s! I was masturbating at least 2 times a day! It sounds like a phase to me!
Though I don’t think I would tell her.
I say enjoy it if it get you horny and turns you on! I masturbate I would and I you have wet dreams from it even better!!
So don’t worry enjoy it why not!
I sometimes times hot women when I am out!
It still turns me on and I get aroused and erect too! I will offer masturbate when I get home!

cwink1 · Answer

Yep! Just a normal teenage fantasy. Just keep it as that, a fantasy.

lover-dude34 · Answer

just a bad phase of time..give some time and you'll get over it

munkilover95 · Answer

Its just a phase don't worry. Just don't think about it, and don't think about NOT thinking about it because it won't help. be yourself, focus your sexual energy toward crushes so you'll think of them rather than your mom's butt. Hang out more with friends and just STOP THINKING ABOUT IT! ignore it. forget about it. it might be hard but just let go, you might not know how but just start doing other things like drawing or reading, maybe video games, idk. find yourself a hobby to take your mind off it and you'll soon realize its gone. thinking about it won't help. to help ur self out, you should probably not look at this question again, or like maybe after a few eeks of not going on and checking.

Hope I helped!

KatiePotatie · Answer

its a psychological thing, I'm actually studying it now, its normal and it will pass x

Anonymous · Answer

if you keep it like that it will definitely get bigger without you realizing it, and I hope you stop it at some point, the point this will stop is when you get someone else to fantasize about but porn won't help, it might make things even worse 'cause there are hundreds of websites that mention such sticky situations... if your mother was the helpful and understanding type she might have her say on this, BUT NOT YOUR FRIENDS!

if this continued and you couldn't talk with anyone about it then you have two solutions: keep it just in your dreams and it will disappear with time, or contact a professional as soon as possible and they sure will help you with this problem, prefer that guidance/physician/professional to be a woman and from your school or local center or something... good luck

Anonymous · Answer

sorry to say but its really disgusting.

anyways, you are 16 and old enough to take control of your feelings. You have to yourself put a stop to this. every time such a thought comes to ur mind you HAVE TO tell yourself that "ITS PUKY" rather than just letting go because you want an orgasm or whatever.

SHE IS YOUR MOM! SHE GAVE BIRTH TO YOU! HULLO?!

don't be like any other sick guy we all normal people see on tv and feel yuck! be a normal person. this can only be achieved if next time you get these thoughts, you remind yourself of reality and not give in to temptation.

Anonymous · Answer

lmao, quit writing stories on here okay. its clearly obvious.

Need advice on confusing wet dream and its effects on me!

Most Helpful Guys

Most Helpful Girls

Related Questions

What Girls & Guys Said

Latest Questions