I just did a porn shoot...

Ok, so I'm a model professionally. Work has been TERRIBLY scarce. So I started looking for jobs, and ended up booking a "maxim style" project. When I actually got there, it turned out to be hardcore porn. I've never done that sort of thing before. They had 14 girls, and the scene was supposed to be a party scene that eventually becomes an orgy. They told me I didn't have to do anything too sexual, but I would make more money if I at least flashed my t*ts. I refused, and instead ended up more like a prospector/commentator then actually participating in the sex acts. One naked guy did start humping me ( I had clothes on), and I just ran away laughing, spilling beer all over the place. They tried really hard to pressure me to do more, but I wouldn't do it. But I didn't just leave because I really needed the money.anything like that again...


Anyway, I made friends with some of the other girls. A lot of them di this stuff for a living, and they say they hate every minute of it but they need the cash. One girl says she can only do it if she's had some drugs before the shoot. Most of them lose they're boyfriends because of it after a while, or say they can't get dates when guys find out what they do. One girl was an escort on the side and said that after the guys had sex with her, they'd call her a whore and act like they were disgusted by her. She just quit having boyfriends all together. I think she sort of resents all men because of this.


My question is...why do guys like to look at porn, but get all weirded out when it comes to actually seeing the girls in real life? These are real people with feelings, and that's kind of hypocritical, isn't it?


The only girl who's Boyfriend didn't have a problem with it was because he worked for Playboy.

 

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What Girls Said 23

What Guys Said 41

  • 7d

    There's a HUGE difference between being a model (even a nude model) and doing p*rn. I 100% understand you boyfriend dumping you because you are doing p*rn (or doing more traditional prostitution). It's not a double standard, either. The entire issue is about having sex with other people. Most boyfriends, while not particularly bothered over your past, simply won't tolerate you having sex with other people in present time (as in while you are supposed to be in a relationship with the boyfriend). Most girls would have the same rules regarding their boyfriend. It matters not that you are being paid to have sex, it's still breaking the rules. Seriously, would you expect your boyfriend to "understand" if you were a paid hit man? After all, murder is OK if someone is paying you to do it and you have not emotions invested in the situation? Right?

    Now, back to the topic at hand. Watching a video of two other people having sex is one thing. Watching a video of your boyfriend/girlfriend having sex with someone else is quite another. I'm not here to defend p*rn, but I am pointing out that the issues isn't the p*rn specifically, its that you are having sex with someone else.

  • Yes, it is a sucky double standard. Just add it to the list of things men expect of women but not of themselves. Oh, and fyi, I don't hate on men but I do see that men's ego's are fragile. I have read posts on here where people are involved in FWB or no-strings casual deals but if the girl has another guy on the side, it's classified as "awful" but, of course, the guy can be sleeping around and it is expected.


    Guys are afraid you are comparing their penis or their performance to another man's. Most are unlikely to be able to handle dating someone who does this for a living.


    Personally I find the fact that guys act like FWB or casual sex is fine but in their minds they consider the girl who does it to be a whore or a slut or just not relationship material. Not many girls will end up in p*rn, but a lot of girls are now exposed to the temptation for casual sex, and they might want to keep in mind what the guy is really thinking about them.

  • This is a very hypocrisy and different standards subject. Porn is pleasure for the mind, not everyone wants to do things in the flesh that they watch. In my opinion, I wish that girls would stop having sex for money, because I think their bodies should be treated like gold. I just think that the excuse of doing p*rn for money is overrated. I wish they would be honest and say why they really do it, cause there are other ways to make money. I know the economy is bad, but there is still something out there for everyone. I think its just a very less respect pressuring business to get into and in the end it just makes you feel less and less like a human being and more like a piece of meat.

  • I do porno movies but I find them enjjoyable. its all a matter of opinion

    • Good point

    • New Zealand would allow a 16 year old girl do porno work?

  • Because porn is all about fantasy. When the fantasy becomes reality, and that reality is in the form of a human being--not an untouchable sex goddess--they're unenchanted. It's f***ing ridiculous, the way men are today.

  • All the women I know watch porn? We girls just don't like to admit it, but we do watch it quite frequently :) There just isn't a whole lot of porn that stimulates a woman's mind, but it's still out there...

  • I say get away from it. I do get your point though it's kinda sad for those girls but I would stay outta that business

  • Wow I'm so sorry! I think on the inside guys want to get off and they want to see a woman do weird stuff, but guys egos won't let them date them because they have done sick stuff with other men. Guys want to see girls do gross stuff, but think they are too good for the women in porn, that's what it boils down too. Hope this helps!

  • Don't be abused just because you're low on cash. You'll regret it eventually. The economy will pick up, but it will take time. Waitress, do retail, but don't go into porn. Please!


    What's sad is most men don't realize the girls they see on Internet porn are not willing participants of sexual acts, but were pressured or manipulated into engaging in porn. WHen you view the girls as victims, it puts a different perspective on the whole porn industry.

  • if a guy has a girlfriend that does that for money, they don't see it as a job. The see it as another male banging their chick. It's a difference of perspective. I personally wouldn't want a boyfriend who bangs other girls.. even if he is tested regularly and has protection, I could still get some kind of disease because of his profession. not fair.


    Esp if these girls get treated like trash and some strange man jizz's on their face..


    seriously, are you surprised?


    i understand cash.. but there are other ways to make money if its that important.


    even a job at mcd's.


    i am by all means not knocking on people that do porn. whatever.. that's cool with me..

  • Find another industry to work in - you will regret it hon, there are not many women who come out of he porn industry unscathed.


    As for the guys who hate on their female colleagues - well, as many of the guys on here pointed out, it's self-loathing - stay away from those kinds of people.

  • There are a lot of guys who actually date pornstars, I read an intense article on it. They say they don't care because the sex and things they do for work, isn't intimate. It's work.

  • Im thinking they like it soo much because they are never seeing the people on the screen they are seeing them and someone they want to be with. Maybe that's it. I mean me I have no problems with girls that do things like that because I'm sure that if I ever needed the money I would bee out there doing the same things. I woulndn't be proud of it but I would do it. I mean some men forget that they are real people because to them they are just some person on the big screen. You know? I think that the men that have done this need to be slapped because no matter what you do in life you are still a human being with feelings and a heart.

  • It sounds like this is actually some made up sly anti-porn propaganda or you just had a very unfortunate and uncommon experience with some people who are not really in the real porn business. There are a lot of amateur do-it-yourself wannabe porn people that take advantage of men and especially women who don't know any better. What you described is nothing like the real professional porn studios. I'm in the business myself and I know. I will admit that not all of the the professional companies are respectful of the actors but most these days are. The real porn industry is much different in the last 8 years than it used to be.

  • good questions...i wonder also why guys love to watch it but would never date one and take her to meet mom. hmmm weird.

  • if you don't want to be a porn model the don't do it.

  • This p*sses me off about men as well. I just don't understand why they feel as though just because a girl has sex for money suddenly they don't deserve basic human respect. I really don't get it, not at all.



    Who in the hell do they think they are judging women like that. It's things like this that make me realize the superiority of the female sex. Empathy is very much a modern, civilisated, evolved emotion, and it is very lack in many men.


    • Yeah agree, their totally using these women as sex objects. then have no respect for them after

  • Be proud that you refused. Hold to your values and life will treat you well.

  • you know, I never really looked at it that way. I never thought that the girls would hate every minute of it or how sh*tty it makes them feel. it sucks that there is such a double standard for women when it comes to this. but that's what women put up with mainly because we live in a society that is still in the mentality that women are just lower than men. its just not the porn industry that uses women. its practically everywhere. even in religion women are lower than men. its funny, they need us to carry their offspring but they still treat us like sh*t give us the crappy jobs and want to use every part of us like some tool. I'm happy you didn't go through with much. I honestly hope you never do it again. you are worth more that a couple of hundred bucks, by you refusing to do much shows that you have dignity and that my dear is one thing that is worth more than diamonds or anything that any man could ever give you and the only thing that cannot be taken from you. no matter what happens you will always have your dignity.


    xoxoxoxoxox

    Lady D

  • Madonna / whore complex


    It is okay in their minds to have their fun and use the women for pleasure but they don't want the mother of their children or anyone they give their heart to to be that type of woman.

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  • Selected as most helpful

    Porn is fantasy pure and simple. When men watch it, it channels something primal in their heads because that is what they want to be doing. But in reality they have no respect for the women, and see them as only sex objects and may act like that is all they are good for. And that's kind of the way society has made it I guess. And the escort, and the guys who called her a whore and acted disgusted. They only say and do that to justify what they just did. Calling them a whore makes them feel better about themselves because they had to resort to paying a woman to have sex. You tell me who is the pathetic one? The woman getting paid, or the man who couldn't get any unless he paid?

    • Wow, very interestign and well thoguht out answer

    • BEST ANSWER!

  • Then again tell me. What if your boyfriend did p*rn what would your reaction be?

  • Because I put them in the same catagory as prostitutes. I look at them and I see one large STD. a vat of them swimming around in her pssy. Even though they may not have any, that is the image and no way am I having sex with them.

  • Because its fantasy, the women are submissive and enjoy doing the most vile of sex acts that us guys can think of. Its one of those deep down things that we want to see a girl do this or that, and when a pornstar does it, we feel like even though we aren't there we are still dominating her.


    However, if we were to meet them in person or even be involved with them its a different story. Just imagining how many guys they've probably been with is a little unnerving for a guy to handle. Also, one thing that makes us guys different from girls is that we are obviously more visual. Whatever our preferences are, we usually bring up those preferences even when we are trying to put ourselves in someone else's shoes. So we also assume that women are visual and enjoy the random sex with strangers. Like you said, most of them don't enjoy it and are there just for the money. But guys don't see it like that, we see it as the woman enjoying it. So she were to be my girlfriend and she's "enjoying" sex with another guy, I feel both jealous and angry. To me, it would be completely unthinkable if a girl that I was with, was having sex with another guy and being filmed doing it. Its sickening and that's what a lot of guys feel. The cold reality of it is that we don't care about the pornstar. We are just fine watching her have sex then having nothing to do with her. Its not my problem who she sleeps with and I'm not going to make it my problem. Hopefully this rambling makes sense? lol

  • if I found a girl that was truly my love and I really enjoyed being around her I wouldn't care what she did. some guys just can't talk the thought of THEIR girl being with someone else.

  • This is an old post, but after reading it just proves what I say to girls all the time. PORN IS A FUEL FOR MENS FANTASIES. IT'S A SPARK TO OUR IMAGINATION TO GET US GOING.


    Most of use honestly don't want a porn star as a wife or girlfriend.

  • thats sickkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk. save yourself...run away from it.

  • It is sort of like this:


    Would you marry your daughter to the person who collects your garbage? No. Why not? They are humans too!


    Also, you like to get your garbage cleaned by them, so why not like them in person?


    Same logic applies here.


    You like to watch porn, but if you think of it logically, it is disgusting that they are selling their bodies (that's what they're doing in a way).


    -------------------


    Another way to approach this is emotion vs. logic. We don't always go with our logic. That's why "love is blind", right? We go with the emotions. Well, watching porn is totally about emotions. You feel horny, you watch porn.


    Then, in real life, you look at things more logically. Someone you meet may be a pornstar, and that is logically the worst job she can have.


    Emotions vs. logic, that's what its all about.


  • dont do porn if you want a real relationship end of story

  • go to school and find another profession. in a recession, nobody needs a model with her clothes on.

  • Get out as soon as possible. The longer you do pornography, the worse you'll feel about yourself, the more abused, and in need of drugs you'll be. Run, don't walk, away from that scene and those pimps.

    • Actually, the scary thing is... you sort of get a bit desensitized. After this experience, the idea does freak me out anymore.

  • the best porn-ish type things are where they're obviously doing it because they want to, there are some places like that on the net. But you're best of acquiring some other skills that can hold you over whilst modelling is thin on the ground. go to college, do some night classes, whatever other interests you have. you would probably do well in 'sales' type jobs. Those other girls are probably what happens when you don't cover all your bases. Now you've seen it and how it's messed them up, do whatever it takes to avoid having to go back.

  • porn is fantasy... real people get aids and such. I think that would be my fear std's...

  • Honestly, it depends on the porn. I don't think the same way of girls who do artistic nude modeling as I do of girls who do hardcore. But basically when a guy is looking at porn he's looking for a fantasy, it is escapism just like video games, movies or anything else. It is a way of hiding from a lack of actual sexual fufilment, for a single person that's okay to a certain extent, but it can be extremely destructive to any relationship. And even for single people, it can become a crutch for a sexually unfufilled life leading into a spiral of lonliness, depression and self hate.


    Looking at porn and looking down on women who do porn is hypocritical on some levels, but just the same as a girl wouldn't want to date a guy who slept around and had a lot of one night stands a guy feels the same way.


    Personally, I think it is no different than an other crutch addiction like booze, if it hurts people in the end. Porn is not a substitute for a real relationship. It's a habit I'm trying to kick because I don't like how it makes me feel about myself.

  • Being a porn star is just another job, granted its probably a lot more enjoyable then other jobs, but still just a job. I think guys that treat those women as whores are damned idiots because they are narrow minded. Sexuality is prevalent in society today and as such there should be no discrimination about such things. Fething double standard strikes again.

  • honestly, those men are just sad


    ignore them, and get another job.


    like, star in a play!

    no sex in them (excluding Amsterdam)

  • its sad but that's the way it is. those girls ARE USED and that's the truth of the matter. we want them in our fantasies but that's all.

  • why would anyone who likes porn hate porn actresses? I for one love the hell out of porn stars and don't understand why everyone has to be embarrassed about sex. being in porn, especially regulated porn (blood tests and so on) is entirely respectable as a means of income. guys who treat women who have sex for money like "whores" have security issues, in addition to being self loathing. these guys are nothing but filthy hypocrites with guilt issues being translated to "disgust" and a holier then thou attitude towards the girl HE JUST PAID to have sex with. think about that. if he's actually disgusted by the girl he just paid to have sex with, he must have some deep seated issues with himself. the prevailing sociological opinion towards sex in this country forces women who like sex to associate with assholes and hypocrites. if you do porn, there is NO REASON to be ashamed. try to find an actual set with medical records being taken, etc. that you don't just frigging walk in on, it would be a much more pleasant high paying environment. good rule of thumb is, if you can mistakenly walk in on it, its probably a shady operation

    • Not really. Everyone had their blood tested.The company was pretty legit; they just didn't get into detail in Craigslist

  • That is pretty stupid. I will admit I have looked at plenty of porn but I can't understand why guys who do would be mean to girls that do that. That's just hypocritical. I feel like if you watch it you really are no "better" than doing it

  • i don't believe that pornography is right... I don't like what it does to women and I couldn't be with a woman who was banging other guys for money...

    but the horny ass man in me still watches it, because I like looking at naked women... porn is literally addictive to men. it does something chemically in the brain... I don't know how it works but that's why.

  • There are 2 types of women in the world, women that you f***, and women you have a relationship with. Would you have a relationship with a guy that has sex with 20 women a week? no... but you would f*** him though wouldn't you, because you know it will be half a decent shag.

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