My girlfriend only wants sex once or twice a week

[Anonymous]

Hi, I am currently dating the love of my life for about seven months. We have been having sex for only about two months, once or twice a week. In the beginning, she told she was a virgin but I found out she wasn't by explicit photos/vids from her ex-boyfriend who she still denies having sex with. Basically, this girl used to have sex on almost a daily basis with her past boyfriends and only has sex with me once or twice a week. I honestly want more than that from her and I get frustrated knowing that she doesnt. I mean lets face it she is well-figured (swimmer) and I am kinda overweight with a beer belly lol. But she tells me she likes the way I am and doesn't care If I gain 100 more pounds. I get frustrated knowing that she also had all this sex with these past ex-boyfriends but when it comes down to us she hesitates and tells me she is busy or has things to do. She used to have all this ex and now with me NO, only once or twice a week. This has been really killing me knowing she knows how much I enjoy making love to her and she does too, but not as often as I want to. Just now , I told her "I want to make love with you" and she told me, "you always want to make love to me" . I instantly became upset. AGAIN. An hour later after that happened, she called me to tell me how much she loves me, that I am the prefect man and she can't imagine to not be with me ever. And she wants to spend the rest of her life with me. I do too. but this sexual relationship between us is fcuking killing me. What do I do? BTW, If you need more info about the relationship, I can provide it. Thanks!

[xEllenx]

maybe she doesn't want to have sex with you as much as her ex's because she feels there's more to ur relationship than just sex and she takes it more seriously than her ex relationships ? I always think and say sex doesn't make a relationship and you shouldn't need to have it every day to have a relationship and I think once or twice a week is a fair enough amount.

[Asker]

She does fill our relationship is more than just sex, I can tell. However, I know we have a healthy relationship but I want our sex life to be too. What should I do?

[xEllenx]

Hmmm have you tried speaking to her about it ? tell her how you feel and that ur a bit concerned and just let her know ur there for her if she has any problems, she may just be feeling a little insecure or maybe she doesn't want to mess things up with you like the fact she lied about being a virgin maybe she might of not meant to lie or hurt you but maybe she was shy or insacure and didn't want to mess things up with you because she liked you for more than tht ? or maybe you could spice it up abit,

[xEllenx]

Maybe you could spice it things up a bit make it different and more fun and a bit of a change to ur normal sex life ?

[paigems]

Did you ever think the ex made the tape to get to you? If that's what he did then it sure is working.

[Asker]

No I got the tape from the ex's old computer which was sold to a good friend of mine.

[paigems]

Perhaps her sex drive has gone down. Is she on the pill now? That may cause her sex drive to go down.

[tzdc21]

If it bugs you that much and she still insists on only doing it twice, then dump her. Because at that point she is not giving you what you want, and is only focused on what she wants. She should be more considerate on your feelings.

And to be honest, just based on the fact that she's lying to you about her being a virgin, that is already a red flag right there. You gotta wonder what else has she been lying to you about.

[Kingkiara]

In my last relationship I used to have sex all the time but only as a way of kind of keeping that toxic ex around cause I was young and dumb with my husband we only have sex 2 a week simply cause A) I don’t feel pressured to feed a man my body to keep a leash on him B) a serious relationship is about growing we work so much that if I were to have more sex I would be exhausted with no time to myself , also when your having sex all the time it makes you feel really bad about yourself , it scares us away and makes us think that’s all it’s about is the sex.