I went down on him but...

I went down on my guy for the first time. He hardly made any noise but I heard him say "oh" and "god" a few times quietly, and he did rub my head and hold my free hand at one point. I went down on him for over an hour. Seriously. My mouth hurt and my legs were cramping, but HE DID NOT CUM! Does this mean I did something wrong? I feel like I couldn't do it right or something.

OK Everyone was so helpful and I appreciate it. I just kept at it and learned some new tricks and really paid attention to his expressions and movements to see what he liked, and the next time I went down he came within 2 minutes! I was shocked. :)
Also, I asked him after about 6 successful bjs why he didn't come the first time, and he admitted he was terrified he would mess up my bed and I would be upset, so he said he was thinking about his grandma the whole time trying to not cum. haha


Most Helpful Girl

  • Wow, you are certainly dedicated to the task you put your mind to! :)

    And no, you aren't doing anything wrong. Ever notice that when you have sex, there is a very rhythmic nature to it? The guy (or girl if you are on top) finds his rhythm and you kind of go with that for a while. BUT as you are getting closer and closer to orgasm the rhythm picks up. And you almost feel instinctively pushed to move faster and faster. That's your body trying to get an orgasm because through rhythm and picking up the pace, that's how it gets it.

    The reason a lot of people don't come during oral sex is because it is either hard to keep a constant rhythm going and very hard to, in your case, move your head up and down his penis fast enough to give him an orgasm. So that's why there is no orgasm. Cause his body isn't getting the rhythmic pace that is increasingly faster and faster.

    There are several things you can try if you want him to orgasm during oral. But first, realize he may not orgasm during oral ever. He may never be able to cause his body might need very specific feelings, that he can't get during oral. So keep this in mind cause you don't want to ever make yourself feel like you aren't doing a good job when it may simply be something impossible.

    One thing you want to make sure of when you start is that he is insanely turned on. Sometimes a guy just gets a hard on and so we start sex. But just like us, guys have levels of arousal. If you start oral when he is at a 5, or doesn't seem to have one of his firmest erections, you are fighting a losing battle. He might get up to a 7 or 8 but he isn't going to get to a 10 he needs to orgasm. So, make sure he is rock hard (or as hard as you see him get) and seems about ready to explode when you start.

    Another thing to consider is you might be licking a guy who likes sucking or sucking a guy who likes licking. That isn't your fault cause he may not even know which one he likes! He just knows it feels good. So when you hear the "oh" or "god", remember what you did.

    Some techniques you can try are, like the guy said, use your hands. You are not cheating him. The best blowjob is with a handjob. Because the hand is better at giving him that rhythmic feel he needs. Your hand can also cling tighter on him then your mouth can. And you can go faster with your hand then you can with your mouth. And since most times you aren't putting his whole penis in your mouth, the hand is going to cover and stroke the part that isn't in your mouth. You can try something like sucking (or licking) the head while you stroke his shaft faster and faster. You can try gently stroking his balls too. Some guys really really respond to that. If you are doing things like touching his thighs with your free hand, stop. That feeling is distracting from the feeling in his groin and because you want him to cum, you want as much feeling focused on the specific area.

    Hope it helps. :)