How far should I go with my boyfriend without sex?

In other words, I love making out but I want to be a virgin until marriage. I'm just wondering is there anything that my boyfriend wouldn't want me to do if sex didn't follow? We make out, I cuddle/spoon with him in his bed while clothed, he touches my breasts sometimes and if we get into making out he starts rubbing my crotch but I tend to stop him before going too far. And he is extremely respectable so he stops when I say. But I wonder if he gets blue balls and really frustrated when I stop him. If he does, he doesn't vocalize it. What should and shouldn't I do? I don't want him to be upset. :(


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't do anything that could lead to an STD. Also, most people don't think about it, but oral sex is a sex act, and when visiting an nurse practitioner, she'll ask questions. You can get or give an STD by having oral sex. In fact, the occurrence of std's found in the throat of girls are increasing. I can't remember which one, but I think it was gonorrhea. Scary and disgusting. I've seen pictures.

    Don't cheat the system. Besides, it's a slippery slope. When I was 18 I made the same pact... and I only lasted 2 years. It's not an easy decision, but I wish I would've waited. I'm finally dating the most amazing Christian man, and the guilt of my past conquests constantly haunt me. Yes, they were learning experiences, but that's something that I could never share with him on our wedding night. Stay strong!

    Limit yourselves in alone time. Never lay down on a bed or couch together, and don't close the door when you're in a room together. I know it sounds lame, but it will prevent you from having opportunities to make mistakes.

    Best of luck!

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What Guys Said 11

  • you could give him a blowob or a handjob that would take care of blueballs

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  • You should at least give him head.

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  • Well yes he will get blue balls if he is right next to a girl and feeling sexual. However if you don't mind him masturbating that doesn't mean you can't have a meaningful relationship. Any good man would wait till marriage if he loved a girl that much. Good luck!

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  • If you want to wait until marriage I applaud you and shouldnt change that for anyone and if he really does love you he won't mind waiting until that day. He may get a little frustrated but he will live, no one has ever died from lack of sex.

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  • If he can wait at least a year then he deserves it.

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    • Thats horrible thinking I mean just because you waited doesn't mean you deserve it. You should think of the chick don't be selfish like that. God. Virginity is special and you need to think of it that way. Its not something you just give to the first guy that comes along and waits a year. That's stupid.

    • You should think the chick not be selfish like that, I'm agree.

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What Girls Said 12

  • You can be a virgin till marriage and still satisfy a guy. Giving head and hand jobs are not loosing your virginity. Neither is fingering or eating out.

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  • He seem so sweet. You should be so happy to be with a guy like him lol, because there's only few in this world, Thank god ii get 1 of the few too lol.

    i feel bad to tell you this, but there's nothing sexuale you could do with him or to him without sex following! aka without getting horny.

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  • I am in a similar situation, but my boyfriend and I have gone pretty far. The most important thing that we have found is being upfront and honest about what we wanted and how far we wanted to go. My boyfriend also wants to wait until marriage, but does want to enjoy the perks that come with being a couple. We have agreed to save blow jobs and him eating me out for later on down the road, when we know how the other person's body works. Everything else we are both okay doing with the other person, because we made the decision first to not have sex and practice self-control, even though it is very tempting. He does things to my neck that make me die and go to heaven, as well as fingering me and I give him hand-jobs he loves in return. It is all what works best for you as a couple. Best of luck to you! Let me know if you have any more questions.

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  • To be honest, anything further than making out can lead to sex. so if you are honestly wanting to wait.. then you should realy wait on doing all sex acts.

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  • Just give up and f you c k him.

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