He literally can't keep his hands off of me?
Is it normal for a girl's boyfriend to touch her in all of her private places whenever he wants to? It seems like whenever my boyfriend and I are alone together, he'll just grab my breasts, my butt, or reach "down there" all the time. We have sex every time we see each other just about, and I do enjoy it, but I still don't know if it's okay for him to just keep touching me like that all the time. Sometimes I feel like he treats me more like a possession that he can do whatever he wants with than a person. I don't know if I'm making a big deal out of this or not, or if this is normal, as he is the first boyfriend I ever had, and I gave him my first kiss and everything just about... I don't have any past dating experience or anything to actually know the answer to this or not.
What's Your Opinion?
Most Helpful Opinion
Yes and No. Let me explain:
Yes, its normal for a guy to want to touch you and play with you a lot (every guy wishes for unrestricted access, very few get it).
No, it shouldn't be whenever he wants (and there's good reasons).
It should be a mutual agreement thing. There will be times when you don't want to be toyed with and possibly vice versa.
Its a nice thing that you let your guy "do with you as he wishes" and it will be very sexy for the guy. Also, it is nice to allow someone complete access to all that is you.
However, it might lead to it also quickly becomming boring which might be an issue. No matter how sexy a person, if a guy is "over sexed" he loses some appriciation for the partner (though, this can happen for under sexed too, its a bit of a tightrope sometimes.. but love is the balancing pole). Not in any nasty way, its the same as if you are allowed to eat as much chocolate as you like, chocolate loses its appeal.. where as, if it is somewhat "restricted" (but not overly) it gains more desirablity (basic psycology).
You need to decide for yourself where to put your boundaries and a good place to start is how you would feel if he rejected you access to his body and at what times you would accept this.
Talk it out together. In a way it will be hard to change things because after having unrestricted access, taking any priviledge away will really test how much he wants you as a person (beyond the sexual) and therefore the relationship. However, its probably a good thing to test because you need him to love you for you as well as your body.
What Guys Said 1
He definitely shouldn't if you don't want him to. It's an equal relationship and more importantly it's your body, you are allowed to say no, or ask him to tone it down if you don't like it or it's making you uncomfortable.
It is "normal", if there is such a thing, for those touches to take place. He likes you and wants to show affection and be intimate by touching all those places he wouldn't normally touch when you're with friends or in public. It is normal, but the level, amount, and force differ completely from relationship to relationship; You get to decide what and how much feel right for you, there's no real "standard".
What Girls Said 1
Don't panic! , it can be a bad thing like you said or a good thing, sincerely, you didn't give enough information for someone to have a clear idea about what is going on,
Anyway, I'll do my best to help you.
if both of you are very young, the explanation would be : he likes you a lot, he is physically attracted to you and is so enthusiastic about sex and the discovery of his body, he might be so excited about having a girlfriend in order to do what every couple does PLUS he is very active sexually (having a high level of sexual hormones)
But in all cases keep your eyes open! he might be enjoying you as an object not more nor less
as well as he can just be the type who feels horny whenever he sees you because you excite him, No need to let worries blind you,
It doesn't mean that all guys are like him, each person has his sexual needs which are different from another person
Anyway, don't be afraid of COMMUNICATION, it is the best solution a couple can adopt when facing problems or misunderstandings,
you should not keep it to yourself if it makes you feel bad or so,
share it with him , be direct but not rude, honest and sincere but don't exagerate otherwise you'd hurt him, and most of all DO NOT DISCUSS IT IN BED, NOR BEFORE NOR AFTER NOR WHILE HAVING SEX, in other words, discuss it when both of you are calm and in a private place , NOT IN A PUBLIC PLACE NOR IN THE BEDROOM,
P.S. : WHENEVER YOU FEEL TREATED BAD OR NOT LIKE YOU EXPECT IN A RELATION, TALK IT OUT WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND, IF HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND YOU AND SHOW NO WILL OF TREATING YOU BETTER LET HIM GO, HE ISN'T WORTH YOU BUT NEVER DO THINGS BY FORCE OR ONLY TO PLEASE HIM
THE BEST OF LUCK ;)