Boyfriend won't cuddle after sex?

[Roboticsanon]

We've been dating for 2 years and I was a virgin when I met him. We never cuddle after sex. After he cums he just gets up, gets dressed and ignores me by playing on his phone or computer. I am not good at hiding how I feel so he has got to see how upset I look laying in bed alone. Sometimes I will sit in his lap while he is sitting at the computer chair and try to at least get a kiss but he has the "we just had sex why are you still wanting attention" vibe coming from him. Might as well throw in the fact that I've never orgasmed and it seems like he has given up on it ever happening. When we don't cuddle I feel sort of used and it hurts my ego. Is it normal for guys to not want to cuddle after sex?

[SansiSavvy]

You MUST communicate with him. How can you expect him to just know these things? I'm not on his side but men and women often think different things at different times so while you're thinking he's just ignoring you he might be thinking you have had an orgasim and don't need anything else from him. Part of the reason you always want to cuddle after sex is because you don't orgasim. Trust me if you have had one, after sex is over you'll not want to move and will feel happy just laying in bed alone.

You need to tell him that you want to enjoy having sex and that's means your pleasure comes first. Since you have been together for a while I'm assuming that you're important to him and if he just knows how you feel he'll want to change things and make you happy.

[samhradh_leannan]

Talk to him about it and let him know how it makes you feel. Try not to be accusatory or critical, because that could get him on the defensive- just be honest about your needs and your feelings. Then ask him to explain how he feels and why he acts the way he does. Maybe you can come to a compromise.

[samhradh_leannan]

If he's not willing to discuss it, address your feelings, or try to compromise, then unfortunately I can only advise that you end the relationship.

[vck_l]

Oh mannn that sounds shit. Can't offer any advice other than serious talk or break up

[ShocknAwem]

Literally after us guys cum, we lose all emotions to everything for like 3 hours. It's just how it works with guys, girls will never understand. Kinda like how we dont understand periods.

[ShocknAwem]

Don't worry he's not using you. He just suffering after-cum emotion loss. Happens to every guy especially after masturbation.

[samhradh_leannan]

I've never sensed that from anyone I've ever had sex with.

[serp777]

@samhradh_leannan Its complete bullshit. Emotions change men to a calmer state generally after the release of a lot of tension and energy but its not like I become a psychopath and lose all feeling after sex.

[ShocknAwem]

@serp777 no it's not complete bullshit. Guys go into what is called a refractory period after we ejaculate. It can cause use to become tired, the penis becomes incredibly sensitive (painfully sensitive), and some guys also temporally lose their urge to have sex as the feeling of horniness just sort of disappears. It also becomes difficult for us to keep it up as the penis usually becomes soft as well. I would at least ask him to try to help finish you off.

[ShocknAwem]

@serp777 I don't think you had sex yet.

[serp777]

Yeah it is, none of what you says implies that all emotions are gone. I said emotions change into a calmer state; Still being horny or not has nothing to do with cuddling since cuddling isn't sex. You didn't say that men lose their sexual desire; you said they lost all emotions. Refractory period =/= emotions gone.

[serp777]

@ShocknAwem I don't think you've ever passed 1st grade reading comprehension. How are you concluding that I haven't had sex? I don't lose all my emotions after sex and I don't always lose my horniness--plenty of people do a second or even third round, its not that unusual. Anyways try being more competent and actually reading what i've written.

[samhradh_leannan]

The refractory period is certainly a real thing, but it has absolutely nothing to do with emotions or cuddling. It's not an excuse to ignore your significant other or act like sex is all you wanted from them. If you lose all emotions and desire to interact with your partner for hours after you have sex, maybe you don't have real feelings for them. It kinda sounds like sex is all you want from your partner and you have no interest in them if you're not horny.

[Zazzy_mac]

Some guys are just assholes like that. I personally don't like to cuddle right after sex because I'm way to hot I need to cool down a bit then cuddle

[RansomDraven]

This is me lol. Get off me, it's hot.

[Zazzy_mac]

@RansomDraven lol right Its hot and I'm thirsty

[Eatmedrinkme]

he's a dick. Leave him

[Intraluminal]

Not at all. He's weird, but you love him, so get used to it.

[jack_Daniels1]

you need out od the relationship. find a guy that will give you the time of day and that can and cares about giving you an orgasm. just by some subtle hints your relationship is unhealthy and mosf likely won't last.

[I_am_repulsive]

I'm not the cuddling type, but I'm working on it for my SO

[annoyymouse]

have you talked with him about it? It doesn't sound like he is thinking about your feelings

[VampireEmpress]

he sounds manipulative to me. he won't give u any attention after sex which means ur the one always giving him attention.

[orphan]

have you tried making him a sandwich first?

[serp777]

Angry ladies downvote and can't understand a joke.

[orphan]

@serp777 thats whats funny tho

[Yanoa_Yanza]

It depends from guy to guy
I love cuddling so, I'd probably just lay there and enjoy the 'present'

[hifromkai]

Does he go down on you?

[Roboticsanon]

No. He has maybe once before. But it was very short.

[hifromkai]

Well it's easier for me to cuddle with the fan on low because then I can cool down a bit and you should ask him to go down on you more and tell him what to do while he's there and make sure he knows where your sensitive spots are and you'll almost definitely reach orgasm eventually

[Hakkattack01]

He's cums and then gets up and plays on his phone or computer! Erm, I'd bin him off! The only person who can stop this is you Roboticsanon! Hope you get it sorted hun. :-)

[thisdudejimmy]

Noooo he's just an asshole. I never just ignore a girl after sex. Thats effed up! I love cuddling!

[jace117]

some guys are programmed to feel guilty after sex, it comes from repeated masturbation and the guilt that may follow after that. You could talk to him, but if he isn't willing to change, you should find someone that makes you feel good about yourself

[Harry2101]

Tell him how u feel

[Anonymous]

i'm here for u bby ;)

[Anonymous]

I think that's terrible and you should definitely tell him. Maybe not cuddling is okay if you both do something like eat. But he shouldn't just ignore you. That's stupid. Don't have sex with him if he's gonna be an asshole.