Labiaplasty a turnoff?

[Anonymous]

would you be turned off or unhappy if you found out your girlfriend or wife had had labiaplasty done on her outie labia to feel more acceptable? i dont mean medical reasons but out of serious insecurity she couldnt get over otherwise. it seems like on one hand there are guys on here who prefer innies and may "put up" with outies but won't find them appealing and on the otherhand they find fake things like breast implants or makeup a bit of a turnoff and a sign of weakness even. maybe im thinking too much into it but anyways i was wondering what the view on cosmetic labiaplasty is. it costs about $4000-6000, risks are low but can be serious, and full healing takes up to 6 months though the person can get back to work in a week what are your views? just be honest

[hifromkai]

Honestly I would need to see what the "problem" is before I can judge anything

I understand the want to have a pretty vagina but honestly it doesn't bother me
Do what makes you happy because an innie or an outie as long as you like when I play with lick or stick it it's not important all vagina's are fun and beautiful if they're healthy and the person they're attached to is healthy happy and comfortable.

If you have insecurities in the bedroom it can make it hard to reach orgasm so do what you have to to make yourself happy but I seriously don't think it's necessary for a surgery on your vagina because your labia stick out a little because honestly I find that a little more pleasing

[Asker]

Oh wow, thanks for the thoughtful response. Hmm... okay, something like this is what I'm talking about https:// upload. wikimedia. org/wikipedia/commons/f/f7/Landing_strip_pubic_hair_pattern_LQ. jpg I don't mind how it looks myself to be honest I actually think its erotic and interesting looking, I am just terrified and would feel inadequate as a woman and bad about myself if I was with a guy who was turned off by it. I have heard guys (including virgins like myself) make fun of it and say truly awful things about it, like saying longer labia looks like exploded hamburger meat and that it's such a turn off and associating it with sleeping around. If he liked it or truly didn't mind, I don't think my bedroom behavior would be affected whatsoever. That would be amazing actually. I've actually got a rather kinky mind so I wouldn't be shy but this one thing really scares me. I don't think I would get the surgery yet anyways. It's too costly.

[hifromkai]

Honestly whether that's yours or just similar doesn't matter because I think that's beautiful it's a massive turn on I wouldn't be insecure about that it's hot

[hifromkai]

Also if that's what yours looks like it's beautiful and healthy with a nice pink color and even labia I wouldn't change it You can't improve perfection

[Asker]

=/ it's not as pink, more like reddish and some darkness at the edges. i'm not a white girl. can't change my skin color there even if I tried but the labiaplasty would get rid of the dark edges actually

[hifromkai]

The dark edges aren't a problem it's just a pigment in your skin and the reddish color is fine because it means you get plenty of blood flow to that area I would not change it because guys shouldn't be that shallow and yours sounds perfect to me Yup it sounds like a healthy vagina with nerve endings and the ability to make you pregnant It does what it's supposed to so in my opinion it's perfect

[Asker]

Yeah it is healthy and normal. I guess I am just paranoid because of what I've heard and that left its mark. I think in circles of friends and online there may be just a little too much idealization and an obsession with preference but when it comes down to 1on1 interaction, people are a lot more forgiving and open to difference. Thank you sincerely for the kind and reassuring words :D I will decide later on if I want to get the labiaplasty done. It's one solution but so is dating someone who is good with it so I should try the latter before signing up for the former.

[Slimbrenster]

Don't even consider it. As far as preference goes, I sit firmly in the outie camp. Before you make any decision, please watch this documentary. (Not xper level 2 yet so just delete the spaces in the link) https:// topdocumentaryfilms. com/ perfect-vagina/

[Zendrya]

I dont think I could take her seriously. That's the dumbest surgery ever if there is nothing medically wrong.

[Asker]

do you think that about all cosmetic procedures?

[Zendrya]

For the most part but no guy cares about the inner lips of a vagina! They just want to smash it. It makes no sense. I can understand why girls may be self-conscious about their boobs or whatever because guys have said they like particular types but guys don't declare a preferred type of vagina

[Asker]

maybe its true at least most guys would look past it if they cared about someone since its just extra skin, but honestly, i have heard great deal of criticism about labia... not just online but from friends as well. maybe not as much as breast criticism but enough. it wouldn't bother me if it wasn't treated as such a turnoff because preferences are normal. you know what i mean? I don't know. it is a weird insecurity i suppose. i just can't shake it off. its been years.

[Zendrya]

For crying out loud one of my lips is really long and the other is super short and I just don't see why it matters. It's just a vagina. My boyfriends never cared.

[Asker]

Thank you for your insight. I hope I get lucky with that kinda guy. take care

[hifromkai]

Why fuck with something that you were born with if it's not causing any health issues if it's making you that unhappy do what you want I'd have sex with them anyway but I just don't think it's worth paying that much money to change something that's a part of you just because some guys are that pathetic and shallow that they attack the size of your labia If they're that much of a fucking asshole that they won't have sex with you or go down on you purely because your vagina isn't exactly how they think it should look then you shouldn't be wasting your time with them

[Zendrya]

Amen to that @hifromkai

[Zendrya]

Thanks for MHO

[EarthToKepler]

Why would women do that.. Labias are attractive as fuck.. Personally I prefer them...

Better then nothing down there

[Asker]

that's really cool you like that, not many say that though from what i have seen. it's ridiculed a lot just like how male penis size gets made fun of although that is usually done by males. if it wasn't made fun of so much, i wouldn't think much about it to be honest. preferences are fine, all the comments about roast beef and it being a turnoff freaks me out though. otherwise i dont mind it myself

[EarthToKepler]

Maybe people will make fun of it but at the end of the day its only labias and I guarantee you that most men will still love it But for me labias are a massive turn on :) Hope you make the right choice :)

[Asker]

Aww. Thanks for the insight :D I haven't decided if I will do it or not, but right now it costs too much so I won't. If I end up with a guy who likes them, I wouldn't do it. I just hope I get lucky.

[TadCurious]

I would think that was a real shame because outies are actually my favorite. (Not that I don't live innies.) Outies to me are more erotic looking, and they're more fun to play with and suck on.

[Asker]

despite wanting to get this, I like how outies look too actually :D

[Intraluminal]

I think that if you need this for YOURSELF its fine. Did they say how it will look close-up afterwards? Because a guy has toeat you know.

[Asker]

It would look like shorter more tucked in labia basically... it does have a "chopped off" look unless you get a really skilled surgeon to do it, I don't think a man would notice unless I pointed it out. ( https:// www. ganchi. com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/labiaplasty-04a-ganchi1. jpg ) Initially you are just bloody and bruised but that goes away over weeks to months and most are happier afterwards. If I get it, I don't know if I would be doing it for me. More like doing it for him... whoever he is.

[Intraluminal]

All I know about you is what you've said in this forum. I looked at the pictures on the plastic surgery site, and some of the women did have protruding labia, but only four of them had labia that seemed like they might make sex slightly difficult, and two had labia that I would consider aesthetically pleasing before the surgery, and my preference is for smaller labia. You should understand that different men like different things, and many men like large labia. You should also understand that the two or three days that they blithely say you will need to recover, are going to be a BITCH. You will be in almost constant discomfort if not outright pain. You will lose some sensation (how important to you this will be I have no idea). You forget just how close a man will be. I mean most guys really like to give head. I am pretty sure that I would notice, but I realize there are some guys who wouldn't. I mean, there are some guys who have been with post-op transexuals and didn't notice.

[Intraluminal]

I've seen them on Jerry Springer, but many guys would notice if the labia looked chopped off. If this is something for YOU then do it. If it's for some hypothetical guy who hypothetically doesn't like large labia, then I think you should reconsider. I don't mean to sound racist, but what is your ethnicity?

[Asker]

south Asian descent. i actually can't afford it right now, so i will save up and decide later. you are right that it is something that should be thought through. most guys preference is smaller, i already know that. i have heard it over and over along with all the jokes. if labia size was something you could know just by looking at a person, the preferences people have wouldn't bother me so much. but you dont know until you get close enough to a person, so what's the point of having a preference at that point? I suppose it makes sense for people who prefer a casual sex lifestyle. I don't know, it's frustrating i can't shake off the insecurity, because I dont really have any other insecurity. I like the rest of me. i dont want to lose sensation but i also dont want to be repulsive to men even if they're too polite to say anything. i do think men would prefer the chopped off smaller labia vs the larger darker ones. honestly, i just need to start dating someone and then see what happens. i overthink

[Intraluminal]

I think you hit the nail in the head. You're overthinking this. Could you tell me which of the pictures on the webpage corresponds most closely to you? I ask because a couple were just fine. Please don't take too much note of guys jokes. Guys joke about things that no one really thinks anything about. I mean that truly. Also pay NO attention to porn. It's not real, and any guy that you would actually WANT to be with would know that. The people are made up and cut up, and the acts that htey perform are ridiculous for the most part.

[Intraluminal]

I just checked out a picture that you linked to called "landing strip." That is NICE looking, you definitely don't need surgery, VERY hot!

[Asker]

yea the landing strip picture is the closest though i am unfortunately darker. O man... I know I am overthinking it! I WISH I could turn off my brain lol Sometimes I feel empowered and sometimes I just want to hide forever. It's dumb that this insecurity runs so deep. Thank you for your kind words and patience though. It does help to hear it. I actually like how it looks. It looks more erotic peeking out. I have spent a ridic amount of time obsessing over it which is why I figured just getting the procedure will put this issue to rest. It seems like every girl who has the large labia is freaking out about it, so obviously there is something societally wrong about how it's perceived just like how it's unfair guys have to worry about penis size (which I actually think is more males teasing males). Can I ask you something? Do the after photos really look that bad? I was under the impression that the men who don't like large labia wouldn't even bother going down on a girl regardless

[Asker]

Oh, and thanks if you think that's hot. Porn actually doesn't bother me at all. I know labia varies. It's pretty cool it does. It's men mocking it that upsets me a lot. I don't want to be seen as less of a woman or a slut because of it and I don't want a guy to hold back in sex because of it. I am a virgin. I have both virgin and non-virgin male friends who have had roast beef comments... it's beyond mortifying esp when average joes are saying it. It has to be pink and little. Really? I should mention that I'm also a medical student, so these conversations do come up relatively frequently during ob/gyn rotations.

[Asker]

Anyways, I'm sure you're hitting your head against a brick wall trying to convince me to stop being stupid. Sorry -_- I'm just ranting. I think I would wait until at least I have a husband to decide whether or not to proceed, because at that point, its just him and if he doesn't care... I won't bother. If I'm honest, I really don't want to get them cut off. I don't want to go through a surgery that isn't necessary, because who's to say rare complications won't be me + that money can go towards moree important things. I guess I just want a guy who likes it. Not puts up with it... but likes it. Is it weird to bring up labia size in early conversations with men? I just want to be upfront so as to spare myself the humiliation lol

[Intraluminal]

The after pictures look fine, but you can't see what the labia look like, all you see is the "closed" appearance. Don't worry about what guys are joking about. Truly, jokes mean NOTHING. Guys are just making noise for the sake of making noise. I don't know about guys not liking to go down because I can't imagine going with a woman, or marrying a woman, and not being allowed to go down on her. Just the idea is depressing. Again, pay no attention to the jokes. Guys are just immature sometimes, but since you're medical student I can understand where you're coming from. I work in medicine. Having them cut off has got to hurt. Since you're a med student, you must know that doctors don't really look at things from the patient's respective. I've overheard cancer docs talking about these ridiculously deforming operations that will give, "an extra three months" of life, and then being unable to understand why patients don't want the surgery.

[Intraluminal]

They forget that the patients are very aware of the pain of the surgery, the recovery time, the pain of recovery, the disfigurement, etc. In the same way, it must KILL to have your labia cut off. As for your question about talking to men about your labia size, I don't know your culture. You say you're from Southeast Asia, which would be around India. I would imagine it would be very unacceptable there. Even in the U. S. it would not generally be a topic you would bring up on a date. "Hi, I'm Kim. I'm very happy to meet you. By the way, do you prefer long labia or short labia?"

[Asker]

Can I just start off by saying thank you sooooo much for this? It genuinely made me feel better. You are very kind. There are more sweet people on this site as there are dumbasses and blunt jerks which is nice to see. I think both the before and after photos are exaggerated to show a bigger difference. Fuller labia isn't honestly that much of a discomfort for most of us. Only while riding a bike sometimes I would say it kind of burns, but I never ride a bike It's mostly out of embarrassment women get it done. Yeah, I think guys are much worse when they are around their friends... always something masculine to prove. They tend to be much nicer individually. I guess I should keep reminding myself that. Med school guys are a little too much sometimes. I think all the status and all the hardwork they had to put into school goes to their heads... like they're entitled to be cocky. Not all of them but a fair amount are like this.

[Intraluminal]

Yeah, there's also the need to joke about things that make you uncomfortable, like death. People in medicine are rightly famous for joking about death. It must be uncomfortable in Southeast Asia for a young man to examine a woman, so the reaction is to make crude jokes about it. Don't let it bother you. Good night.

[Asker]

my parents are from pakistan but i was born and raised in the us. is my race somehow relevant to the convo? but ugh, definitely cannot bring up labia since i have to date muslim men or all hell will break loose... But hmm there are a lot of liberal muslim men so maybe they wouldn't be opposed to all sexual things I don't know. see this is why the whole labia thing is frustrating. if it's a dealbreaker, can't the deal break before i develop any feelings? blah. already so bent up about this issue, i dont need it to get worse. its okay, i suppose i have to remember that the sky will not fall if i hear a criticism and there's a fair chance there won't be criticism and its all in my head. i just have to be more confident about this, no one is perfect and I know I am very forgiving about appearance so i can't speak for all men... because they may be the same. Anyways, you're right again that doctors aren't always wary of what goes through a patient's head. A doctor's goals are very one-track minded.

[Asker]

by the way, I'm not in South Asia, I'm in the USA. It's American guys making these comments. Foreign guys are much more gentleman about it.

[Asker]

Ignore the rambling. Thanks again and good night

[Northeast106]

I wouldn't care, honestly some of the post surgeries come out really nice. It's very risky, I'm not telling you to do it, but if people can modify their noses, breasts, and ass checks why not the labia? Do what you want to do, just fully understand what you are getting into before you go through with it.

[Asker]

thats true i guess some cosmetic producures are more accepted than others since theyre more known but in the end theyre all the same idea. i would say the only thing holding me back is how much it costs. i would be an idiot to spend that much right now. im too afraid to get sexually active because of it though. i dont personally dislike how it looks, i actually like it. i just am afraid of what men will think and it would be nice to not have this one insecurity because i think otherwise id be confident with myself.

[Northeast106]

@asker truthfully there are men who would love it. I mean you're always going to get that guy who won't, but I don't think you should go through an expensive surgery if you are happy with it yourself. I always admit, if there was safe and effective penis enlargement surgery I would do it.

[Asker]

yea its indeed tempting the fact that there exists something i can do to completely rid myself of this problem and insecurity. I've always found people criticizing penis size or circumcision/not frustrating as well on behalf of dudes. it just bothers me when people get harsh about such intimate features that very few get to see. i actually dont plan on sleeping with multiple men so I don't know how i will find someone who likes it. i just hope whoever i marry won't find it unattractive. if he doesn't, i wouldn't go through with it. surgery is a serious thing that may usually go right but if it goes wrong, damn to lose something precious for something that wasn't needed.

[Northeast106]

Exactly, you're safer not going through with it. Try to go with a nicer, more mature man in general.

[Asker]

thanks for your advice

[Northeast106]

No problem. Just being honest.

[Asker]

oh yeah, also would large labia be a turn off? just be honest again

[Northeast106]

No. A really long clitoris turns me off a bit though. I would never say anything to her about it, but deep down it would. The labia doesn't bother me, but small ones do look better.

[Northeast106]

They are aesthetic. Realistically though most people are not perfect from head to toe. I'm not either, I care more about a girl's face and general body shape than her vulva.

[Asker]

Gotcha. Yeah, i mean, I can't blame anyone for what they genuinely find aesthetic. It's just human. If I could've picked, I'd pick smaller labia... not because I think it's better looking but only because men seem to like that more. But alas I can't remember a time my labia didn't peek out. They did as a kid too. Fml lol. And no, my clit is normal sized. When you say turn off do you mean it would affect the sex? Like what you're willing to do with her kinda thing?

[Northeast106]

I only meant a really long clitoris, you know cause it would sort of look and feel like a micro penis or something. Especially when giving oral or when its stimulated, so for me it would psychologically mess with me. I dont mean the labia, i wouldn't be phased at all by it, so with me you would be 100 percent good. Every guy is different too some like them long.

[Northeast106]

Just like when girls tell us not to let certain women's size preferences get to us, its the same thing.

[Asker]

Alright. Thanks!

[Asker]

Hey!! I wnted to askk you something again since you're thoughtful about it. I think Im gonna slowly save up to get a labiaplasty (its actually like effing $10,000 for my labia structure ugh). im just tired of feeling bad about myself so i think i wwould be happier if this issue was out of the way. do you think having plastic surgery like labiaplasty is something a person should come clean about with their future husband? i haven't decided when i will get it. whether it be before getting intimate with anyone, after, or after childbirth. probably after im married i would decide since if in the off chance he truly likes it, i think i could let it go. if not, i dont blame him and would just do it. does this seem reasonable?

[Northeast106]

You dont need to tell anyone if you go ahead and do the procedure. It's not really something that needs to be confesses in my opinion. I wish you the best of luck with your surgery.

[Looch]

I prefer large, even dark labia. I truly wish women would only consider labiaplasty for medical reasons as I understand some extreme cases can cause issues, anything beyond that would be disappointing

[Kuraj]

Nope, but I would be turned off by roastbeef.

[Asker]

if you cared about someone and then found out she had that, what would you do?

[Kuraj]

Nothing, I just wouldn't find it as arousing and attractive. I personally don't liken labiaplasty to implants and the like, I would liken it to thing such as laser treatment of acne, removal of warts or cysts. Labial hypertrophy is an actual medical condition that labiaplasty is intended for, unlike having small ass or boobs.

[Asker]

Would it affect sex for you? Like would you try less with her because of it? And I wouldn't compare enlarged labia to acne or warts/cysts at all. The idea is more similar to breast implants... it's just how much female private parts grow during puberty. Acne is an inflammatory condition. Warts are due to viral infection. Large labia is only rarely due to hormonal issues.

[Kuraj]

Probably not, but I would certainly be less inclined to go down on her.

[Asker]

i see. ok. at least you're being honest. thanks

[Anonymous]

That would be a deal-breaker for me. I love long labia.

[Asker]

would it be a dealbreaker because she chose to get it removed or because they would no longer be long enough as you like it?

[Opinion Owner]

Both.

[Asker]

I wish there were more people out there like you, honestly. I do think you're in the minority though

[Opinion Owner]

I guess saying both was a little too far. I wouldn't turn away a woman for not having long labia, it's just what I prefer.

[Asker]

oh okay. that seems fair.

[Anonymous]

If ik I couldn't help her feel better bout her self then I'd b fine with her and suport her if it made her feel good and helped her self esteam

[Anonymous]

What disturbs me is that opting for labiaplasty suggests her V is a high traffic area.

[Asker]

-_- Why do people assume labia is related to sexual activity? A lot of sex will not alter labia at all. Only childbirth potentially can. Large labia is genetic. Mine peeked out as a kid as well and I am actually a virgin.

[Opinion Owner]

Not what I intended. Rather, I see no reason you should modify your body to please an audience and it signals the notion that audience may be more than one or a few.

[Asker]

oh like you mean how pornstars get this procedure done? Yeah I guess thats a fair point. I don't care about audiences. It would just be relevant to anyone im in a relationship with.