Want no strings attached sex from ex boyfriend? How do I initiate?

[Anonymous]

This is going to sound really messed up. My boyfriend and I broke up 2 months ago after living together 6 years. He walked away and now we are neighbors. Haven't really talked to him very much since. He is very distant and I've tried to talk to him and work things out but he gives one word answers or doesn't respond. Anyways, while I still have hope one day of working things out...right now I'm having fun without him. But, I really, really want sex. It has been six months and I want some no strings attached slam, bam, thank you no strings attached hard core sex. We never had this when we were together except in the first year where we had it all the time because we lived in separate cities but saw each other 3 days a week and always had sex and one of us had to leave. It was great! Now, I just want some good sex with no strings attached that I can walk away from. And as jacked up as his seems I want it with him (not due to the emotions) but because I know who he has been with and trust him more. If not I will end up having it with some stranger and end up regretting it even more if in the future we do end up getting back together. Am I wrong for wanting this? If not how do I approach him for this? Or should I just choose some stranger?

[rainydaydreamaway]

I think you can tell him you want 'no-strings-attached sex', and he may like the idea.

But - TRUST ME ON THIS - that is not likely to truly happen or last with an ex. There ARE strings and while the hot sex will hide them for a while, those strings WILL rear their ugly heads sooner than either of you will acknowledge, so maybe you'll both try to ignore them, and they'll silently get more tangled, till they are a mess to pull apart.

Do yourself a favor and either:

Go ahead and propose this to the ex, but discuss what you both think is wisest if things start getting complicated.

OR

Find another guy and let yourself have a no-strings relationship with him (glad to hear you place priority on safe sex!). If you and the ex are broken up, you owe him no explanation for your actions during this time, even if you get back together at some future point.

Also, do you know for sure that you know who your ex has been with? Are you sure you are any safer with him than with a new partner? After all, he owes you no explanation of his actions while you've been broken up as well, and thinks you'd probably prefer not to know.

[l-hedoniste]

Wanting sex is normal, and if your ex is willing, problem solved. Directness would work: "I need sex. Want to come over?" The advantage of a stranger, however, is that they have no expectations, and go away when told.

What you do when you're apart is none of his business, so your conscience should be clear if you get back together. You'll note that he didn't wait around for you.

[noejr10]

I think you should tell him that ... tell him you just want sex and nothing serious he might understand , 6 onths is allot of time with out sex