I've known this girl for a bit and have been thinking of asking her on a date. She's in my college class. We've talked for a while, but I wanted to...
I've known this girl for a bit and have been thinking of asking her on a date. She's in my college class. We've talked for a while, but I wanted to convey my interest, so I started touching her to show that. At first it was just tapping her shoulder or holding it for a second. Then I started putting my hand on the small of her back when I opened doors for her. Now it's at the point where I put my hand on her mid/low back when we walk and what's amazing about all of this is that she has never flinched/recoiled at all or told me to stop or pulled away. I always checked her facial and body reactions discretely whenever I make a move like this and she never showed any signs of discomfort.
I'm not sure---do girls let guy friends touch them like this? Like literally, when we walk, I can have my hand on her back the whole time and she doesn't care.
Most Helpful Girl
try to reach for her hands, if you're walking try to hold her hand, or if you don't wanna go that far, then when you're sitting in class, try to put your hand on top of hers, and see how she reacts, does she pull away quickly being freaked out uncomfortable, or does she blush, smile, show some positive gesture? also, if you want an excuse to touch her, the last guy that liked me wanted to see me ring and bracelet so he just went for it and gently grabbed my hand saying how cute my jewelry was...and I blushed like a fool! lol
yes go for her. We don't let just about any guy friend to touch us that way... its pretty much unconsciously like your body doesn't clinched because it "accepts" you... I am that way too... when my body feels comfortable with someone it feels normal but when not then I just feel uncomfortable and it will show in my face or reaction...
I'd agree with the first two posters. Unless she's generally very comfortable around guys, most girls won't just like any guy touch them and not flinch, especially in sensitive areas like the small of the back.
I think it means she's comfortable around you...Does she look you in the eye a lot? Do you feel like she wants to date you? Or is she avoiding eye contact? You won't believe how much eye contact means...
SheLIKES you - that is really cute - I like that you did that, cause you are actually giving her a chance to see if she feels comfortable with you physically.
My boyfriend did that with me & I LOVED it cause I had no clue that he liked me so every time he did something it was a shock & electric.
Plus that way we never had to have an awkward conversation or anything.. everything kind of developed at the right time... It was gradual.
But also, when guys I DON'T like touch me, I automatically recoil, I do not even doit on purpose unless I feel it is inappropriate , in which case I tell them I do not like to be touched... I do not seem to have a problem, sometimes my guy friends touch me but if I am attracted to them I naturally do not ind,but if I am seeing someone it bothers me...
But if a guy friend were to doit often I would get uncomfortable case I would not want to lead him , unless I was attracted to him in which case I would be happy.
I agree with anonymous. I think she likes you. Most girls won't let you do this without showing any discomfort unless they have some feelings foryou. So now you just have to decide what you are going to do next. I say go ahead and ask her on a date. Just make it a kind of casual thing at first then take it from there.
Yeah, I have guy friends who are more touchy than others, so I wouldn't really see this as a guy who likes me as more than a friend. To make it seem like more than friends, it would have to be his arm around my shoulders or something. If you do that and she seems into it- she doesn't pull away or stiffen up or anything- you might try this: One thing you could do to show her is when you're facing each other fairly close- like maybe if you're talking before she goes into her room?- look at her lips, lean in a little, still keeping some space between you, then look back into her eyes and say bye. That will definitely give her a clue, and she'll probably like it. ONLY do this if you're pretty sure she likes you though.
Ask her in as casual a way as possible if she appreciates physical contact or not, act like you don't care - don't try to sound searching. That's my advice because - a guy friend of mine used to be very touchy with me, and that intimidated me, I hate being touched - I mean I was scared, because no one touches me.. ever. I didn't let him know it scared me because I was too intimidated to speak to him, I ended up telling our school counselor at the school who had to talk to him about it. He didn't get in trouble, but he never did that to me again.. I wish I wasn't too freaked out to open my mouth.. and please keep in mind that this is a RARE case - most girls would tell the guy to stop, I was very easily intimidated like that - but it is a very slight possibility she could be like that, extremely extremely slight possibility, but for the risk of it then ask her at some point..
I have had a male friend who did this. Yeah I liked him but I was so confused since he never told me his feelings and all he would do is: touch my lower back, tickle, poke me. It was ALWAYS HANGING OUT (sorry, that just drove me nuts and now I've placed him in friends zone).
Since you are transitioning from the many "hang-outs" to dating...just try holding her hand. I think that action is self-explanatory and not awkward at the same time. Then if you want to take a step further, let her know how you feel only if you want to make it exclusive. By the way, she is comfortable with you so she let you touch her...I have had guys who would try to touch me and I would just take a step back, flinch, or tell them "sorry I don't like people touching me". I rather hurt their feelings by making it clear of where I stand than having them keep doing it many times more.
I have a guy friend who does this to me. I kind of like him, so I let him and don't make any kind of face, or flinch or whatever, I just continue as I was. But if I didn't like him at all like 'that', I would probably give a quick look to him of like 'Hmmm why you doing that..'
She's comfortable with you, and doesn't think you're creepy. This is very good, but it doesn't mean she'll want to go out with you. She might also not let you touch her in CERTAIN places you might feel like going. :p
Try holding her hand next, and see how she reacts. If she responds positively, you're free to ask her out. >.> However, keep in mind there's the very small possibility that maybe she's just putting up with this because she doesn't want to make you feel rejected.