Sexual Health
+1 y

Telling him he has a small penis?

Guys, has anyone here ever had someone tell them that they had a small penis? If so, what was that like? I imagine it being terrible, but I don't really have any way of knowing. And just to avoid any anger, I would never do this. Girls, have you ever just flat out told someone that they were small? What affect did it have? Were you trying to be cruel? Did you feel bad afterwards? And if anyone is wondering this question is coming from just having witnessed my friend tell her boyfriend and two other couples that he was the smallest guy she'd ever been with. He turned all red and stormed out of the bar. I don't think she was even mad at him, I think she was just drunk. This might have made it worse for him because if everyone thought she was mad we'd be less likely to believe her, but I think most of us think she was telling the truth. I can't believe she did it though.
Updates:
+1 y
I have an update. This is probably unsurprising, but my friend hasn't spoken to her boyfriend since the incident. He hasn't taken her calls or answered his door. She feels terrible, and only kind of remembers the incident. I guess she was really drunk
+1 y
Why do you get so few characters to update? Anyway, I was going to say that I haven't asked her if it was true, but from the way she's been talking about it I'm pretty sure it is. So it's not a huge surprise he's so upset.
+1 y
In case anyone was curious, they broke up. There was some back and forth, but I don't think things were ever actually good between them since she announced that to everyone. She feels terrible. She told me that it was true, but that she didn't care. Oops.
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Ok, so, 2 parts: guys, and girls

    GUYS

    well, no one has told me directly, but I know I have a small one, and one of my ex's has hinted at it. It's a hard blow ot my self esteem for sure, but I try to make for it in other ways. I feel as if your question is asking about the emotional effects such an incident would have though so here's what I think. It's a hard blow. A very. hard. blow. Some guys get depressed (like clinically) over it. Some guys don't even hook up with girls any more. Others don't go to public restrooms or showers anymore. As illogical as it sounds, penis size is a source of, pride? manhood? I don't know how to describe it, I guess dignity is a good word too. Telling a guy he's small (especially considering he most likely already knows he is) is probably one of the worst things you can do to him. Just hearing it from a girl can be devastating. Now keep in mind, some guys are not effected by this. a good public example of this is Timothy Delaghetto on youtube. you can search him up and watch what I'm talking about.

    GIRLS

    my current girlfriend was mad at me once, I'm talking furious. Funny thing was, we had broken up at the time and she found out that some time after we broke up I had sex with another girl. Any way, she was really p*ssed and told some of her friends I had a tiny d***. Now, she either said it because she knew it would attack me in a place I was vulnerable, (most likely true) or she just said it because she thought it was true and was just talking about it (also true but I don't think taht to her its small. she's a virgin so when she tries to put osmething as big as my d*** in there it hurts her). any ways, we got back together, I asked her about it and she felt so bad. (as far as I know, maybe she doesn't? I think she does). so yeah. she was trying to be cruel.

Most Helpful Girls

  • This probably isn't really an answer to you Q, but feedback is feedback, right?

    I think it's COMPLETELY different to A guy telling a girl she's fat or whatever, I mean, That SUCKS but at least being fat can be changed.

    I would never tell a guy he was small, or make him feel that he wasn't well endowed. I don't think you need to go out with the "oh my god you're so huge" bs, but always make a point of giving them reassurance; cos if you're thinkin it's small, then they've probably heard it before, or been made to feel that they don't measure up, and as a result have got some penile "confidence" issues. I know as a girl, I like reassurance sometimes that my "bits" are a turn on and that.

    Your friend. OmG! Not kosher! That poor guy. How did she feel about it when she sobered up or whatever?

    • She feels really awful. I don't think it was planned at all or anything like that. I really think it just came out. That probably doesn't make him feel any better though since it kind of means it was on her mind to start with. Poor guy. I kinda wish they all had the exact same size so they wouldn't have to worry about it so much.

    • LOL I agree. If we just all had the exact same size penises and vaginas, what would our threads be about though? I have had that thought though--not sure why nature saw fit to have such a huge spread in sizes unless its to make us explore our true worth as a human, an imperfect human.

    • Did she at least enjoy sex w him? How big was he?

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  • If I really liked someone (which I would have to in order to find out they had a small penis) then I wouldn't say it because chances are they already know. Most men go through a phase of obsessing about their bodies just like women do. I think a nice shaped and nice feeling penis is better than a big one anyway - that's not to say that I don't like bigger penises also.

    The friend you witnessed telling everyone her boyfriend had a small penis must be pretty frustrated - unless she is just nasty. Most women can't climax through penetration alone anyway. I get the impression from lots of women that they think it's ok to be mean to men, don't you?

    The poor man must feel awful. I hope he gave her what for!

    • I understand you thinking she's nasty, I'd think that too, but she usually isn't. She's smart and sweet and one of those people involved in so many good causes that it makes me feel bad about myself. She isn't much of a drinker though. I guess maybe that was it. That lousy drunk honesty.

    • Maybe she's frustrated and it came out due to the demon alcohol? Ouch.

    • Women like to cut men down but they don't get the severity of this cut. They think its stupid but even so its just true. There is no cut a guy can do to a woman, except maybe rape, that will inflict the depth of hurt this does. Imagine if he'd raped her in the bar--thats the emotion this guy is working through. He may "recover" and find a girl, but he'll always have a big scar that could hurt any relationship. Are you ladies happy now? You go girl--cut that dude down!

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  • Wow no way would I ever do something like that to a guy, but like you I've been around when a woman (and I use the term loosely) did something similar to her guy. We were all at the bar and her boyfriend walked up to her and started dancing with her and her friends. She put the hand up in front of his face and started singing we don't want no short dicked men at the top of her lungs. Now I spoke to him later and assured him she was just being a cruel bitch, knowing him personally 10 years before, I could assure him he was actually bigger then average, at about 7 1/2 inches.

    But yes some women do love making fools of men by proclaiming there short comings even if it is not true.

    • These women are wrong or are some of the most heartless nonhuman entities in existence. They may think they are "making him a fool or knocking him down a notch". Honestly, just say he can't do oral or some other bash--guys are sensitive enough he'll beat himself up for it but can recover. Bashing his penis isn't about just a physical problem, it alters his selfesteem for life and is way way deeper of a psych cut than you gals understand. You just have to trust its that bad even if we act like not.

    • I agree with you 100%, as a matter of fact my man now, was told years ago that he was small by one woman and I have to constantly reassure him he's just the perfect size for me. So it is something that sticks with a guy for a long time if not forever. There is no excuse for anyone to treat a guy like that.

    • @tammymac, thank you for working with your guy on this. I've been with my wife for 18 years and she never knew I secretly hated my size and lived in fear that someday she'd go off to find that "ultimate big d***". I subconsciously "made up for it" by getting very good at foreplay, oral, fingers. It recently came to a "head" where I was almost suicidal over it. She finally made me understand the intense pleasure my size gives her and bigger is only going to cross into pain. So, I am content now.

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  • Honestly, Yes. Although upseting no. Crazily it was a turn on. Although face to face is one thing in a public bar. that's iffy. Not sure how I'd react to that one. I'm different tho I don't think I'd storm off, I'd just giggle with ya. Then again I'm different I guess.

    Although most guys take that HIGHLY offensively, and no he probably won't have anything to do with her ever again. Which it seems like that's what she wanted, and I guess she got what she wanted. I guess if she knows she can't keep control over herself while wasted maybe she shouldn't get wasted.

    • I missed your answer before. Why was it a turn on? Was it part of a BDSM thing, or was it just while having regular sex?

    • Lil red answering in so much detail on this board... yikes.. normally I can explain these things, although when infront of god and all his children I guess I do turn red just as others...

    • @alpinestars-2002795 what size is ideal for you? Is 6 inches smaller Than preferred?

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

7 35

  • It is clinically proven that a man's ego is sewn directly to his penis. So when a woman makes any sort of negative comment about our penis, it will immediately crush our self esteem. This includes the duties which our penis performs. I'm kind of surprised the guy didn't move to a new city. We don't want to risk any chance of someone saying."Hey.you're that guy with the really small pecker".

    I'm not surprised the relationship failed.he would have been insecure from that day forward with her in the are of sex.

    What a shame we aren't all 12" long and able to last an hour.we'd have so many more confident men out there.LOL.

    • We'd have so many more bow legged women out there lol

  • I wrote a guy's facebook that I would never put my mouth on his small stuff (paraphrasing) because I wanted everyone to see it. I only did this because we had hooked up (only kissing and a handjob took place) and he went back to his friends and I'm pretty sure he told them that we did more than that because I was with this other guy at a basketball game and his friend went up to the guy I was with and told him something about me getting with his friend. So I only told him he had a small penis because he tried to make me look easy.

    And what's really funny is this guy is in one of my classes and before this happened he was in class every day and ever since this happened (which was like a week ago) he hasn't been in class.

    • I have no idea what the f*** you are saying. Please use some f***ing periods and basic grammar. Holy sh*t.

  • Think of it like a guy calling you fat, or ugly.

    Some people are really really and I mean REALLY concerned about it.

    I personally have a bigger dick than the average man, and I'm not even done puberty yet, so I'm not worried, but a lot of people are really uptight about it.

  • I've told someone this before and I only did because they said something extremely inappropriate to me. Of course I think he knew his pen (yes that's right pen) was small. Anyway I think hearing me say it, knocked him right off of his high horse. We didn't speak for a like a year after that. We are cool now. It's never come up in conversation. lol B/C what I said was factual he wouldn't dare dispute it. LOL LOL

    • How big was he if you were to look at a ruler?

    • @CoKaCola it may not be factual because what women think is small isn’t actually small…actually small is under 4 in in the USA

  • I would if he was arrogant or an asshole. Otherwise, I wouldn't. And I wouldn't date a small guy either. I would find some way to break up once I found that out.

    • apparently size does matter

    • @rationallioness so if he thought you were a bitch he could say you had a loose pussy then right?

  • Wow, that's cold. No to your first question, I'm pretty well endowed from any observation. But, I have seen this happen before when someone was comparing me to another guy she was with and I broke up with her for it. I don't care if the guy is small, you shouldn't cripple his manhood like that. After that event, I took him to a club with me to forget about it.

    • You, sir, are a true friend! That's truly awesome you'd stick up for another guy like that. So many men are quick to jump in with the women and bash another guy down. We really need to support each other more as women are getting progressively more hateful toward men. You make me proud to be a guy (and that's a rare thing these days! :-) ).

  • imagine your boyfriend telling all his friends that your vagina looks like a car crash and stinks like a box of rotting fish. that may come close to the embarrassment, except you may recover from that, whereas it will stay with the guy for the rest of his life and may well ruin his sexual confidence forever. luckily I have an above average penis and if any woman were to ever say that about me I would most likely whip it out and p*ss on her there and then :)

    • You are correct, there is no insult we can throw at a woman that equals this one for most guys--not all. Except, rape--it has similar emotions but isn't really something we can use! You are so lucky you were reassured at a young age that you had no reason to doubt your worth due to your size. I'd venture to guess you've generally felt confident in most things you've done in your life, NOT just sex--is that correct? Those of us average or less aren't so lucky and have to backtrack to resolve it.

    • I never used to be confident. I didn't find confidence in any aspect until I hit 19, then I just realized I wasn't gonna get anywhere in life unless I changed my self image. its all in the mind.

  • I’m honest I tell any woman I’m interested in I’m small

  • I've been told by several women that they've never seen a smaller dick than mine, and I consider this a tremendous accomplishment, because if a woman doesn't let me have sex with her, she's more likely to use me exclusively for oral service, and I've become an absolutely amazing asslicker. I can bring virtually any woman to climax simply by performing anilingus for her.

  • In high school it was unbearable. Word spread from the boys locker room to the female students. I had one female friend who actually consoled me over it.

    But at 19 I met a woman who created in me a small penis humiliation fetish and that opened up a whole new world for me. She enjoyed doing naughty things to me and I enjoyed her deliciously evil words.

    We dated for over a year and my penis never entered her body yet it was the most sexually satisfying relationship I ever had. She actually made me like having a tiny penis and man boobs.

    Another woman I dated had a fear of large penises and her previous boyfriend was 5" and she said that hurt. so she was giddy and relieved when she say me 2.5". She I should have married.

  • She should feel terrible. What a B I T C H. It would be like if her boyfriend said, "oh yeah by the way, my girlfriend has the smallest and most awkward boobs out of anyone I've been with."

    If I was that guy, I would have just said" not everyone is perfect-- for example, you have an ugly face/ small boobs/ fat/ disugsting ass/etc.

  • Fortunately I don't have this issue so no one has ever said that to me however if your friend was trying to be an ahole she certainly succeeded. Why say that in public of all things? Maybe he should have announced that her pussy smells like rotten trash. Need to be mature about stuff - what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. I never kiss and tell and I would certainly never say something of a personal nature like that - especially in public

  • this is like the equivalent to a guy saying to a girl

    ur vagina smells horrible or saying she as small tits

    or

    kicking the guy in balls forever

    ouch!

  • No girl ever has told me that if anything they tell me its big some say its alright. But I never believe a word they say. Even though they never tell me that its still an issue. People are always cutting up on white guys and I just can't believe anything any woman tells me. It really hurts though. Sometimes women are so mean. I've seen girls laugh at other dudes but I really haven't been around town as much as they have. In this world sex is everything this world is sick. It really hurts me to not be able to satisfy a girl as much as possible because it makes me feel like my existence has no meaning. It is a organ there is basically no way to make bigger. There is nothing being done about it. Its a terrible feeling for me to think what if she is stabbing me in the back. God must've been high when he decided to do this. I refuse to put a child here where they too experience the pain I have.

    • thats why people marry virgins bro. you are automatically the biggest she ver had

  • Oh that was a low blow. I'd probably dump a girl for humiliating me like that in public. It would be like announcing in a bar that you have lopsided tits or that she has a beefy vaginas lol

  • Has anyone told me that? Many times. Here are the indispensable facts first: flaccid 1 1/2” erect 6.02” and 5” girth.
    Ok obviously flaccid I can’t argue bc 2” below average is indeed small... but erect too? According to every scientific study I’m at the upper end of average in length and a little above average in girth... but in real life I’m considered small and too thin. My last ex claims I was her smallest by far.
    Almost every relationship starts out with what the girls like to portray as amazing sex, but by the sixth month sex is them walking up to me with a bottle of lotion and a towel. I’ve had a horrible complex about having a small penis my whole life that I’m working very hard to overcome, accept, and embrace. It’s never bothered me for a girl to say my penis is small when flaccid... but being told I’m small erect by so many different girls crushed me. Don’t get me wrong... there isn’t anything I wouldn’t try to please my girl. Sleeves. And dildos are a regular thing. I’m good with that totally.
    What does it mean then when a girl says “you’re perfect I’ve never even quietly wished you were bigger,” And shortly thereafter asks how I’d feel about a strap on because the bigger dildos “would feel better if you were behind it.” Like I said I would much rather for a girl to say I’m small if that’s what she honestly believed... at least then I know I need to try to find other ways of pleasing her. But the lying to “protect his feelings” or whatever is what makes it worse. Makes a guy feel like there must be something so terribly wrong with him if people are too afraid to even utter the words. If a guy genuinely asks if you think he’s small, he knows the answer. He just wants to know how you feel about it and will you accept it or not.
    Sorry for the rant

  • Yes I have been told I have a small penis more than I will admit. How it feels depends on the situation. Ino a bar in front of friends would not be good at all however there could be some exceptions to that, at least for me there was and still is. For exame, (only my experience) if we have not been together long and have never talked about my small penis I feel insecure and being outed in front of friends sucks, even if/when she was drunk. Like a man saying your the biggest girl I've been with. Now, when I have been with a woman a while or we have discussed my penis and I feel like if we break up that's not the reason I would not be mad just embarrassed. Lastly, I have been with wife 20 years, we've had lots of talks about my endowment. They range from me apologizing, asking if she's mad or has regrets to her other lovers. I know and she has told me I'm the smallest by far considering the 2nd smallest other than me was 7 1/2". And yes she has told on more than one occasion that I'm small and the smallest to others but I'm okay with it because after 20 years I know she's mine, I know she likes telling others (not sure if it's just a humiliation and control issue, or if it turns her on). I know that when I have been attracted to another woman attached she knows she makes sure she finds out I'm small

  • nope. not that i know off anyway.
    and i didn't know this was an old question, but jesus, this must be the sadest thread i have ever seen in my life.
    goddamn, i can't believe so many guys have been told this.
    i can't believe so many girls would say it.
    there are some things that you simply dont say, you dont call a fat person fat, you dont calla short person short, and most certainly you dont say that a guy has a little dick. thats worse than raping a man. who does that? wow, this thread is unbelievable

  • I’ve Been told how tiny it is and that Im less of a man

  • yes two girl lifeguards at the pool showers. I was changing in a stall when it just opened and I didn't notice it and they were laughing

    • I hate shrinkage too. (gotta love seinfeld)

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