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Telling him he has a small penis?

Guys, has anyone here ever had someone tell them that they had a small penis? If so, what was that like? I imagine it being terrible, but I don't really have any way of knowing. And just to avoid any anger, I would never do this.Girls, have you ever just flat out told someone that they were small? What affect did it have? Were you trying to be cruel? Did you feel bad afterwards?And if anyone is wondering this question is coming from just having witnessed my friend tell her boyfriend and two other couples that he was the smallest guy she'd ever been with. He turned all red and stormed out of the bar. I don't think she was even mad at him, I think she was just drunk. This might have made it worse for him because if everyone thought she was mad we'd be less likely to believe her, but I think most of us think she was telling the truth. I can't believe she did it though.

Updates:
I have an update. This is probably unsurprising, but my friend hasn't spoken to her boyfriend since the incident. He hasn't taken her calls or answered his door. She feels terrible, and only kind of remembers the incident. I guess she was really drunk
Why do you get so few characters to update?

Anyway, I was going to say that I haven't asked her if it was true, but from the way she's been talking about it I'm pretty sure it is. So it's not a huge surprise he's so upset.
In case anyone was curious, they broke up. There was some back and forth, but I don't think things were ever actually good between them since she announced that to everyone. She feels terrible. She told me that it was true, but that she didn't care. Oops.

What's Your Opinion?

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • My wife and I had made a xxx homevideo. She has a friend that is really pretty and was always visiting. She used to flirt with me a lot. One day she came over and asked to borrow some movies for the weekend. I included our tape in the plastic bag of movies. Well, a few days later she returned the videos to me. She kept glancing at my crotch and had a smile on her face. Finally she said that she saw our tape and watched only a few seconds of it. I acted like I was shocked that it got mixed in he bag. She looked at me and said "your **** is f***in small. Way too small for me. What is it.like 4 inches? And she laughed and said.you must be doing something right because your wife has stayed with you all this time." I was so embarrassed! I never knew that my **** was considered small! None of my girlfriends ever said anything. Then I realized that they had all cheated on me! Suddenly I noticed that my **** was hard in my shorts and she never even knew! Since that time she and I talked a lot on the phone and she always giggles. She showed me her 9 inch dildo and said that is what she needs. I have jacked off in her panties that I took fro her dresser many times since and I think she knew. Now I am turned on when a woman knows that I have a small **** and I enjoy the humiliation.

    • When life hands you lemons, make lemonade, I guess. Glad it worked out for you

    • Okay.. does your wife know any of this?

What Guys Said 20

  • She should feel terrible. What a B I T C H. It would be like if her boyfriend said, "oh yeah by the way, my girlfriend has the smallest and most awkward boobs out of anyone I've been with." If I was that guy, I would have just said" not everyone is perfect-- for example, you have an ugly face/ small boobs/ fat/ disugsting ass/etc.

  • Honestly, Yes. Although upseting no. Crazily it was a turn on. Although face to face is one thing in a public bar. that's iffy. Not sure how I'd react to that one. I'm different tho I don't think I'd storm off, I'd just giggle with ya. Then again I'm different I guess.Although most guys take that HIGHLY offensively, and no he probably won't have anything to do with her ever again. Which it seems like that's what she wanted, and I guess she got what she wanted. I guess if she knows she can't keep control over herself while wasted maybe she shouldn't get wasted.

    • I missed your answer before. Why was it a turn on? Was it part of a BDSM thing, or was it just while having regular sex?

    • Lil red answering in so much detail on this board... yikes.. normally I can explain these things, although when infront of god and all his children I guess I do turn red just as others...

  • Ok, so, 2 parts: guys, and girlsGUYSwell, no one has told me directly, but I know I have a small one, and one of my ex's has hinted at it. It's a hard blow ot my self esteem for sure, but I try to make for it in other ways. I feel as if your question is asking about the emotional effects such an incident would have though so here's what I think. It's a hard blow. A very. hard. blow. Some guys get depressed (like clinically) over it. Some guys don't even hook up with girls any more. Others don't go to public restrooms or showers anymore. As illogical as it sounds, penis size is a source of, pride? manhood? I don't know how to describe it, I guess dignity is a good word too. Telling a guy he's small (especially considering he most likely already knows he is) is probably one of the worst things you can do to him. Just hearing it from a girl can be devastating. Now keep in mind, some guys are not effected by this. a good public example of this is Timothy Delaghetto on youtube. you can search him up and watch what I'm talking about. GIRLSmy current girlfriend was mad at me once, I'm talking furious. Funny thing was, we had broken up at the time and she found out that some time after we broke up I had sex with another girl. Any way, she was really p*ssed and told some of her friends I had a tiny d***. Now, she either said it because she knew it would attack me in a place I was vulnerable, (most likely true) or she just said it because she thought it was true and was just talking about it (also true but I don't think taht to her its small. she's a virgin so when she tries to put osmething as big as my d*** in there it hurts her). any ways, we got back together, I asked her about it and she felt so bad. (as far as I know, maybe she doesn't? I think she does). so yeah. she was trying to be cruel.

  • Think of it like a guy calling you fat, or ugly.Some people are really really and I mean REALLY concerned about it.I personally have a bigger dick than the average man, and I'm not even done puberty yet, so I'm not worried, but a lot of people are really uptight about it.

  • Wow, that's cold. No to your first question, I'm pretty well endowed from any observation. But, I have seen this happen before when someone was comparing me to another guy she was with and I broke up with her for it. I don't care if the guy is small, you shouldn't cripple his manhood like that. After that event, I took him to a club with me to forget about it.

    • You, sir, are a true friend! That's truly awesome you'd stick up for another guy like that. So many men are quick to jump in with the women and bash another guy down. We really need to support each other more as women are getting progressively more hateful toward men. You make me proud to be a guy (and that's a rare thing these days! :-) ).

  • yes two girl lifeguards at the pool showers. I was changing in a stall when it just opened and I didn't notice it and they were laughing

    • I hate shrinkage too. (gotta love seinfeld)

  • 7d

    Well my first gf teased me saying I have a babydick. And also her friend who when for the first time meeting her at a pool party, we went in the pool with only underwear, laughed at me saying a have such a tiny penis. How did this make the young me feel? Well at the time I thought I could just let it slide by not affecting me but thats not possible.

    • 7d

      . I guess after i fully processed what actually just happened to me I felt emasculated, inadequate, and sexually unconfident constantly. I tried jelqing to be better for my gf which just caused minor nerve damage. Sadly I don't recall one time I had good sex with her over a 2 year relationship. its never been the same since, and I've had no healthy relationship with another girl. What makes things so much worse was I guess she felt bad and lied to me everytime we did it saying how big I was. Then to top it off when we broke up she said "she just already knows what I feel like" in a dissatisfied manner, she was looking for something better I g

    • 7d

      I guess. I feel like I've wasted the best years of my life and regret not being with anyone. But thats just what being a man in this ruthless world of nature, the bigger man gets the mate. I've never been open about this for obvious reasons and I just want to know how to have a normal relationship. fuck letting my past affect me like this and ruin my life

    • 7d

      p. s. I appreciate anybody who gives to time message me about this. I really wanted to get it in the open off my chest

  • imagine your boyfriend telling all his friends that your vagina looks like a car crash and stinks like a box of rotting fish. that may come close to the embarrassment, except you may recover from that, whereas it will stay with the guy for the rest of his life and may well ruin his sexual confidence forever. luckily I have an above average penis and if any woman were to ever say that about me I would most likely whip it out and p*ss on her there and then :)

    • You are correct, there is no insult we can throw at a woman that equals this one for most guys--not all. Except, rape--it has similar emotions but isn't really something we can use! You are so lucky you were reassured at a young age that you had no reason to doubt your worth due to your size. I'd venture to guess you've generally felt confident in most things you've done in your life, NOT just sex--is that correct? Those of us average or less aren't so lucky and have to backtrack to resolve it.

    • I never used to be confident. I didn't find confidence in any aspect until I hit 19, then I just realized I wasn't gonna get anywhere in life unless I changed my self image. its all in the mind.

  • this is like the equivalent to a guy saying to a girl ur vagina smells horrible or saying she as small tits or kicking the guy in balls foreverouch!

  • It is clinically proven that a man's ego is sewn directly to his penis. So when a woman makes any sort of negative comment about our penis, it will immediately crush our self esteem. This includes the duties which our penis performs. I'm kind of surprised the guy didn't move to a new city. We don't want to risk any chance of someone saying."Hey.you're that guy with the really small pecker". I'm not surprised the relationship failed.he would have been insecure from that day forward with her in the are of sex. What a shame we aren't all 12" long and able to last an hour.we'd have so many more confident men out there.LOL.

    • We'd have so many more bow legged women out there lol

  • A similar scenario happened to me, but it involved my entire high school.I was on swim team and girls would always watch guys, so I started going out with one of the girls, and she told all her friends that I have a tiny penis.as if it wasn't obvious enough when I was wearing a speedo. That got around to the entire school and everyone knew I had a tiny penis. I'm not too worried though, at the time it sorta sucked.

    • Ouch, I'm sorry that happened to you. You must've hated her after that. I wonder if it's something about swimmers. I remember in high school all the swimmers called one of the guys "Needle" and everyone knew why. Maybe it's the Speedos.

  • 1mo

    I'd be in bad shape. I probably wouldn't show it like this guy but, especially if it were true, I would never be the same. I'd always think Im never pleasing her because of my size and there is nothing I can do, this would lead to me feeling like inferior to her previous lovers, which would destroy all my confidence. A fat boy can lose weight but he can't grow a bigger penis. It is a really mean thing to do, however, the truth is the truth and sometimes it hurts, this is something only a woman can decide for herself. The most suitable characters are selected by females to produce offspring. If a big penis makes her wet and want to have sex, this guy needs to seek elsewhere, ya can't blame her instinct, her behavior yes, but the booze brings out the truth.

  • I have been told I am small by 3 women and I have been ruined psychologically. When I have sex I always have to think if I am big enough am I really satisfying her is she enjoying sex does she fake it when she isn't in the mood is it because I am not hung I don't get many bj's is it because she thinks I have a baby dick? I am over 6" in length and over 5" in girth. I am 6 ft tall 235 lbs and have very broad shoulders. I feel worthless most days as I hear on tv all the time big penises being worshipped and praised by women, open my email and yep it's another penis pill, cream, or stechting device promised to add inches and keep her happy. I loose sleep, become un-productive at work googling to see if I am normal. I can't take much more of this.

  • i was in a restaurant full of people with my Ex Girlfriend.We had a discussion about sex and suddently she tell out loud that I have a small package...Right after she tell that, some people around were watching me and some girl around were laughing.Oh god, I remember my body was shaking...Since then I have some insecurity about this and lost self confidence, when I go out and a gril walk by me I just flee...i don't know what to do about this :(Seriously girls, if your Boyfriend have a small penis, don't make him feel mad about this, if you have to tell him so you can work your way for better sex, try to find a way that will not hurt him.

  • lol what size is considered small just interested. The surveys done for academic reasons that I have found on the interenet shows that the average size is around 5.5 -6.6 inches for most men in this world. Of course that's only the average. Also when you ladies say the guy you been with has a small gun, what size do you prefer? Like you all want a 10 inch or something? If that's true wouldn't that be as ridiculous as us guys demanding all you girls to have D cups? where the average is probably B-C ? I don't know whether mine is small/large, but considering I use a normal size condom I guess mine's pretty average. However, if I was that guy in the bar who got insulted for no reason, my immediate come back would be maybe your vagina is just too friggin big, the only reason a guy wants you is to smuggle drugs. lol

    • Sounds good, but it wouldn't work. Women don't link their worth at an early age to their vaginas. That's why 1. Insulting her vagina in any way is not nearly by a large margin as destructive as fussing a guys penis. Plus, most vaginal problems can be modified, penis size not so much. Never, never, never heard a guy say he was disappointed in sex because of a big 'gina. 2. Any attempt to come back in this scenario feeds the perception you agree with your inadequacy and strengthens womens insults.

    • Sorry, should have been "dissing " not "fussing". Also, as women don't comprehend the link between your penis and your worth as a person (heck, most guys don't know either and are confused why it hurts so much), they feel free to toss this insult around and tell us, just get over it. I've said before, hitting most guys here ellicits very similar emotional effects as rape. It instills self hate, shame, anger, feeling violated, ultimate intimacy problems depression low self esteem. Sorry but true

  • to be completely honest ... I don't blame the guy... that's is very embarrassing to the guy. I might have reacted the same way. its bad enough he's got a small penis, but to have your own girlfriend announce that to other friends must be humiliating. were other people in the group you were with still associate with him?

  • My wife is the only one to ever see mine outside of an operating room. She unfortunately got her first look by taking it out, erect, while sitting in the car, I had jeans on. I was about 35 pounds overweight at the time. The only other two she had seen were in different scenarios and on guys who were very thin. So, to her mine looked small. She said, "is that it?" I was dumbfounded and just mumbled, "yes". She proceeded to play with it and even a little BJ. I swallowed down the pain. I worked on getting really thin to help the look. It is right in the middle of average, but to this day I think of it as the tiniest penis on earth. That was 18 years ago and it still bothers me when I remember it, so I mostly try to suppress it. I have asked her why she said it, she knows it bothered me, so she said she just wasn't sure I was completely hard or something and claims she really doesn't know what she was thinking. She's stayed 18 years, but I know there's other compelling reasons to do so. She swears the sex is awesome and she has no problems orgasming, but it was a blow to a part of me that I don't think will ever heal. I wish women could get past the man hate (yes, I think a lot of guys deserve that hate, but a lot of us don't) and see that it isn't just making fun of a funny little penis. Right or wrong, from a very young age for some reason, their feelings toward their "manhood" really does become intertwined with how they view their worth as a person. Boy, nobody wishes that weren't so more than me and a lot of other guys, but it is what it is and you just deal with it. So, I expect to get some hateful responses and that's OK, it doesn't change the dynamic of this scenario. And, any guy that ever made you feel bad about any part of your body, I am sincerely sorry. You are beautiful just the way you are. I certainly wish more people could see that about others, men and women. Thanks for reading, I hope this provides some fodder for reflection.

  • size separates the men from the boys...The reason most women don't come from intercourse is because (1) the tool isn't big enough (2) he's not using it right (3) it doesn't last long enough. I've got a good size, experience and stamina and its never been a problem for my women.

    • Actually the reason most women don't come is because they have low emotional intelligence. Do the research.

    • 38d

      You really are an ass and if you bad any common sense you'd realize that.

  • Women want a nice sausage not a little pickel d*ck. No surpise they broke up. She back with the ex because she got aDickted and wanted that old thing back.

  • I'm pretty big, so I've never had a girl tell me THAT. But I have had girls tell me I'm a quick cummer, which is pretty much a similar experience I'd think. Yeah, of course it's totally embarrassing but I guess I can understand where it comes from. And as in your friend's case, when a little alcohol is involved something that normally you'd keep to yourself might slip out.

What Girls Said 9

  • Wow no way would I ever do something like that to a guy, but like you I've been around when a woman (and I use the term loosely) did something similar to her guy. We were all at the bar and her boyfriend walked up to her and started dancing with her and her friends. She put the hand up in front of his face and started singing we don't want no short dicked men at the top of her lungs. Now I spoke to him later and assured him she was just being a cruel bitch, knowing him personally 10 years before, I could assure him he was actually bigger then average, at about 7 1/2 inches.But yes some women do love making fools of men by proclaiming there short comings even if it is not true.

    • These women are wrong or are some of the most heartless nonhuman entities in existence. They may think they are "making him a fool or knocking him down a notch". Honestly, just say he can't do oral or some other bash--guys are sensitive enough he'll beat himself up for it but can recover. Bashing his penis isn't about just a physical problem, it alters his selfesteem for life and is way way deeper of a psych cut than you gals understand. You just have to trust its that bad even if we act like not.

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  • If I really liked someone (which I would have to in order to find out they had a small penis) then I wouldn't say it because chances are they already know. Most men go through a phase of obsessing about their bodies just like women do. I think a nice shaped and nice feeling penis is better than a big one anyway - that's not to say that I don't like bigger penises also. The friend you witnessed telling everyone her boyfriend had a small penis must be pretty frustrated - unless she is just nasty. Most women can't climax through penetration alone anyway. I get the impression from lots of women that they think it's ok to be mean to men, don't you? The poor man must feel awful. I hope he gave her what for!

    • I understand you thinking she's nasty, I'd think that too, but she usually isn't. She's smart and sweet and one of those people involved in so many good causes that it makes me feel bad about myself. She isn't much of a drinker though. I guess maybe that was it. That lousy drunk honesty.

    • Maybe she's frustrated and it came out due to the demon alcohol? Ouch.

    • Women like to cut men down but they don't get the severity of this cut. They think its stupid but even so its just true. There is no cut a guy can do to a woman, except maybe rape, that will inflict the depth of hurt this does. Imagine if he'd raped her in the bar--thats the emotion this guy is working through. He may "recover" and find a girl, but he'll always have a big scar that could hurt any relationship. Are you ladies happy now? You go girl--cut that dude down!

  • This probably isn't really an answer to you Q, but feedback is feedback, right?I think it's COMPLETELY different to A guy telling a girl she's fat or whatever, I mean, That SUCKS but at least being fat can be changed.I would never tell a guy he was small, or make him feel that he wasn't well endowed. I don't think you need to go out with the "oh my god you're so huge" bs, but always make a point of giving them reassurance; cos if you're thinkin it's small, then they've probably heard it before, or been made to feel that they don't measure up, and as a result have got some penile "confidence" issues. I know as a girl, I like reassurance sometimes that my "bits" are a turn on and that.Your friend. OmG! Not kosher! That poor guy. How did she feel about it when she sobered up or whatever?

    • She feels really awful. I don't think it was planned at all or anything like that. I really think it just came out. That probably doesn't make him feel any better though since it kind of means it was on her mind to start with. Poor guy. I kinda wish they all had the exact same size so they wouldn't have to worry about it so much.

    • LOL I agree. If we just all had the exact same size penises and vaginas, what would our threads be about though? I have had that thought though--not sure why nature saw fit to have such a huge spread in sizes unless its to make us explore our true worth as a human, an imperfect human.

  • I have told a guy he was packing small but that was because he is a player and to cocky for me,...player all the way...i know he was playing me so to crush his little ego I told him he is packing small...and man it felt good telling him...normally I would never do that but I felt that needed to know since he thinks he is the sh*t.

    • The are ways to knock a guy down to size or just wait and life will do it for you. You girls don't understand the disproportionate amount of suffering you inflict on guys by bashung his penis because you don't have one and don't know his life story and how society has wrapped his worth up so much in his anatomy. It may be stupid to you but it is very very real to most guts. He may even be a jerk because he's been taught to overcompensate for feeling worthkess inside. I

  • I've told someone this before and I only did because they said something extremely inappropriate to me. Of course I think he knew his pen (yes that's right pen) was small. Anyway I think hearing me say it, knocked him right off of his high horse. We didn't speak for a like a year after that. We are cool now. It's never come up in conversation. lol B/C what I said was factual he wouldn't dare dispute it. LOL LOL

  • I dated a small finger sized penis wimp that was so tiny Icouldnt feel it it was pathetic & horrible it kept fallling out & Icouldnt feel a thing & Itold him & he started crying like a baby sissy wimp & all I could do was laugh Ilet him try a few more times on other occasions but it was just more of the same me laughing & him crying like a girl ! I broke up with him & of course he cried ! I told all of my girlfriends & showed them photos & after we were done laughing til we peed they said they were so sorry for me & hooked me up with a real man with a real mans big dick that keeps me very satisfied not like that little fairy minipenis crybaby sissy wimp douglas t. Gugel that couldn't even be a man he's probably gay now & wearing panties or diapers & crying or something? That poor little sissy crybaby tiny peenie wimp ! LOL sincerely , jenniffer

  • I wrote a guy's facebook that I would never put my mouth on his small stuff (paraphrasing) because I wanted everyone to see it. I only did this because we had hooked up (only kissing and a handjob took place) and he went back to his friends and I'm pretty sure he told them that we did more than that because I was with this other guy at a basketball game and his friend went up to the guy I was with and told him something about me getting with his friend. So I only told him he had a small penis because he tried to make me look easy. And what's really funny is this guy is in one of my classes and before this happened he was in class every day and ever since this happened (which was like a week ago) he hasn't been in class.

    • I have no idea what the f*** you are saying. Please use some f***ing periods and basic grammar. Holy sh*t.

  • I've really only seen two dicks. (My bf's and one of my past bf's who just kinda pulled it out out of nowhere to show me...) My bf's isn't small but the past bf's was. I told him he had a small penis when I caught him cheating on me. But if I was with a guy as he had a small penis and he was faithful and a good bf, I wouldn't tell him. It's not his fault.

    • Actually, I think I can condone this insult for a guy who habitually cheats as this kind of guy is vile to me. Sadly though, these guys won't care--they obviously aren't shy about their size if they throw it around and they obviously don't care what women say or feel. Also, they know the insult is said in anger so it doesn't mean the same. Its us guys that love and want to please our women that get devastated when our size is ridiculed and made a joke.

  • My ex asked me once if he was small. He was but I lied and said, "Nooo sweetie of course not!" and he was like, "well my ex told me I was...am I really?" and then I fessed up and admitted it. He then proceeded to ask if I knew any guys that were bigger that I had come across in the past. Talking about his smallness and comparing to others was a HUGE turnon for him as it turns out. He'd ask me to talk dirty to him...which meant he wanted me to tell him how small his thing was. I thought it was strange, but I guess it might just depend on the guy?

    • This is a symptom of a guy who has agonized to the point he is either going to kill himself or embrace his inadequacy. He chooses to embrace it then gets a twisted psychology like you saw. I find it disgusting guys are pushed to this point but I can see why.

    • I'm the same as your ex - love hearing my gf tell me I'm small. Better she's honest than lies about it :)

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